My dad is a really good guy, I love him so much and he's gentle most times. Though he gets angry sometimes but he's reasonable about everything he does.

I came home 11:30 which is very late and I knew that and I even hated it too that I came home this late so I was trying to avoid him even when he asked to come to his room because I had a gut feeling that things won't gi right.

But I ended up going to get my charger that was with him, then for the first 5 minutes in he was making sense about why I came home late and I was agreeing to it that it's true

Then all of a sudden he starts saying "what will people think?" "Neighbors are watching" "they'll start saying god forbid, like father like son" "I nor fit let my pikin be like this boy" "which kind family be this, see when their son dey come house?" "People are watching, people are judging" and even more words and it started getting annoying to me, then he said they will say "see when this small pikin dey come house"

It was at that moment that I shut it down, I've never been that way to him but it was so infuriating, I told him I'm not a child I'm 18 which is legal age, I work for my money, I make 50k to 300k a month on my own; no neighbors give me food when I'm hungry, the landlord doesn't clean my eyes when they hurt from viewing my phone too much so I don't give a Bleep what they think of me. I told him to not put all those orientations in my head because it affected me alot when I was younger and it made me timid and shy and scared of being myself or having different opinions and that's what I'm trying to fix in myself and my mindset now.

What I do feel bad about is last year I paid for the house rent and packing when I had alot of money, I brought it up when I was talking to him and said "I paid for this house with my own money so who is landlord or the neighbors for me to be sacred to come in and out of my own home, I know what I did is wrong and I'm sorry but don't put those bad thoughts in my head" I shouldn't have said that though by bringing up what I did for family. He only called me back and said "don't worry I won't talk to you anymore until I use my own money to pay for the house next time" I didn't say anything because i know I was wrong and nothing good would come out of talking back, I just left his room. What pissed me off asides from things he said was the fact that he was putting himself down and the family down with his words all because of what other people will think. God! I hate it so much because he's been doing that for years always comparing us to other people, wanting us to behave in a way that won't upset people, to be seen as perfect and likable by everybody and when I realized this fact I start working on myself till this day, i still get that feeling of timidity but I always push through because really who gives a Bleep what people think of me that's why I was so timid when younger that I hated myself. Coming home late was wrong and I told him that yes it's true but those things he was saying is where we had the issue.

What's your thoughts on the matter?

I am very proud you stood up for yourself instead of letting him "put all those orientations in my head because it affected me alot when I was younger and it made me timid and shy and scared of being myself or having different opinions and that's what I'm trying to fix in myself and my mindset now". The fact that you stood up shows you are cured.

Now go and apologise to your father for misspeaking about the rent, and you shall be a man.

DamianDd:
My dad is a really good guy, I love him so much and he's gentle most times. Though he gets angry sometimes but he's reasonable about everything he does.

I came home 11:30 which is very late and I knew that and I even hated it too that I came home this late so I was trying to avoid him even when he asked to come to his room because I had a gut feeling that things won't gi right.

But I ended up going to get my charger that was with him, then for the first 5 minutes in he was making sense about why I came home late and I was agreeing to it that it's true

Then all of a sudden he starts saying "what will people think?" "Neighbors are watching" "they'll start saying god forbid, like father like son" "I nor fit let my pikin be like this boy" "which kind family be this, see when their son dey come house?" "People are watching, people are judging" and even more words and it started getting annoying to me, then he said they will say "see when this small pikin dey come house"

It was at that moment that I shut it down, I've never been that way to him but it was so infuriating, I told him I'm not a child I'm 18 which is legal age, I work for my money, I make 50k to 300k a month on my own; no neighbors give me food when I'm hungry, the landlord doesn't clean my eyes when they hurt from viewing my phone too much so I don't give a Bleep what they think of me. I told him to not put all those orientations in my head because it affected me alot when I was younger and it made me timid and shy and scared of being myself or having different opinions and that's what I'm trying to fix in myself and my mindset now.

What I do feel bad about is last year I paid for the house rent and packing when I had alot of money, I brought it up when I was talking to him and said "I paid for this house with my own money so who is landlord or the neighbors for me to be sacred to come in and out of my own home, I know what I did is wrong and I'm sorry but don't put those bad thoughts in my head" I shouldn't have said that though by bringing up what I did for family. He only called me back and said "don't worry I won't talk to you anymore until I use my own money to pay for the house next time" I didn't say anything because i know I was wrong and nothing good would come out of talking back, I just left his room. What pissed me off asides from things he said was the fact that he was putting himself down and the family down with his words all because of what other people will think. God! I hate it so much because he's been doing that for years always comparing us to other people, wanting us to behave in a way that won't upset people, to be seen as perfect and likable by everybody and when I realized this fact I start working on myself till this day, i still get that feeling of timidity but I always push through because really who gives a Bleep what people think of me that's why I was so timid when younger that I hated myself. Coming home late was wrong and I told him that yes it's true but those things he was saying is where we had the issue.

What's your thoughts on the matter?