If by any reason, I regret relocating into the UK, in a way my soul swears for that man called buhari, because not only will I have been able to cope in Nigeria because I financially doing well, it just seem like the insecurity, delapitated financial, health, educational anf other sector has fallen short of catastrophic mess reason why I left. Sequel to my previous post on here, I have seen people blame me for apparently doing somethings am nt meant to do, but then no matter what I come here to discuss, na me know the intoto, and na me know exactly the toe inside the shoe wey dey pain me. The recent event of yawa that happened was when myself, my colleague who found me the job that am working at now went for lunch break, and I have sang plenty praises and accolades about this my friend to madam about how nice he has been to me and she knew he was the one that linked me to this good job. Recalling that day, she had called me at work that shes coming to London area with her director, a lady she met in this country who also linked her to beauty and cosmetic business with a well known brand thaat they want to come and sample and sell some products at a mall there in London. So during lunch, i called madam, cos we normally go to get launch at this same mall. Omo na so I call madam oo, sey shey u dey around, sey me and my friend dey mall for lunch, if u dey around make you for meet and greet am o, she come sey she dey one eatery, make i waka come there, funny enough we were just a minute away from her. Lo and behold as i saw madam and her director, I greeted the director, then reached out to madam to introduce her to my friend, omo she just sat down there, me wen dey expect sey since u know this na my correct friend wey help my life, u go at least stand up and greet him proper, omo she didnt stand, and I could see the way my friend was nodding his head while talking to her, it shows a sign of respect, but madam didnt reciprocate, I felt somehow...after the intro we left and I called her few mins later sey why u come downgrade me like that, that you could not even greet my friend proper, in which as of one i observed her while sitting there, the cloth she wore was an eyesore, so I knew thats why she didnt stand up,so I said why you come wear this kind clothe wey I know sey u nor fit wear comot for house if I was at home, she quickly confessed that it was because of what she wore that made her not stand up to greet my friend, that she apologised, but she has something to tell me, I said what, that is it possible that I allow her to be free to wear whatever she wants, that for example because of how shes dressed, it drew attention towards her that people tend to approach her for the product while giving her commendations that they like her shape and body, that she sold more products than her director, i was like wow, and u listen to pastor JERRY every morning, if you practice the preachings and you allign by the words that you hear, do you think you approach is the best way to sell your business? That you feel using your body as an object of attraction to well market to me is an indirect process of establishing organized and professional prostitustion. She said no oo, that sebi me I know sey UK tough, and she had to use whatever way to convince customers to buy from her. It didnt end there, wetin come burst my head be sey, she come tell me to allow her be free with whatever she wants to wear, and that I should put it into writing for evidential purpose so I wont deny it in the future that I accepted, omo my hND FALL, Something wey nor fit sup for NIJA.
I stylishly agreed, and penned it down on whatsapp message that I agree, I did it because, to catch a monkey u must act like one, u cant drag anything as such as that here, cos if I disgree, she go do am anyways and it will only cause more probs, but for my mind, we never spend a year, u dun dey run crazy race, me wen use millions carry us come here na to come here come dey follow your own dirty mandates, so I just dey plan on how we go go back Nija and destroy our passports. Since that time, she dun dey wear werin she like, wey be sey my daughter come tell me one day sey she nor like wetin mummy wear comot that she had to keep dragging her shirt down to cover her bum, I Was devastated that my 10year old will have such conscience and awareness.

As he be now, I wan use style sey my 40th birthday will be celebrated in nija, if she gork the FM we all go together, na say gobe, we nor dey come back again. The recent issue wey I experience na denial of sex. I go touch am, plz plz am tired....or am not in the mood, truth be spoken, there are different reasons why a woman might feel that way, and I pretty much understand that there are certain reasons like fatigue from work, too much thoughts, cos this town na billing, she does most of the house chores, so that alone can be wearing her out, but when we dey nija, no matter how stressed, tired or mentally down she is, she go open for me, its not even about turning me down, its about the way she does it, angrily and authoritatively, na then i come dey sense sey there could be more to it, is it because I earn lesser now that I was in nija, is it because the system is changing her mentals. I come give am lamba one day, i said I dreamt u have started having feelings for someone else, (jokingly oo) she said where, in school or where, I replied the dream is not clear, so U dont know, she said is it Lanre ( the guy I complainedabout in my previous ost) I said the dream did not reveal any identity, he nor reach 12 mins after we don ditch that discussion, She just came from nowhere and said damn am honrny, something wey i never hear from her in a while, now thinking, is it because I raised the false dream story? Something aint adding up there, in which I saw on her phone dey ask the guy to borrow her 30pounds, that does not speak well to me. Nlanders does any1 have a perfectly built up story or FM to take cornishly take us bk to nija, or the one I talked about is legit and ok? Nobody knows it all, why am here. Remain blessed brothers and sister.

Wahala

If you need free ride from the airport to your hotel or home upon your arrival. Quote me later.
It's 100% free of charge.

twang414:
If by any reason, I regret relocating into the UK, in a way my soul swears for that man called buhari, because not only will I have been able to cope in Nigeria because I financially doing well, it just seem like the insecurity, delapitated financial, health, educational anf other sector has fallen short of catastrophic mess reason why I left. Sequel to my previous post on here, I have seen people blame me for apparently doing somethings am nt meant to do, but then no matter what I come here to discuss, na me know the intoto, and na me know exactly the toe inside the shoe wey dey pain me. The recent event of yawa that happened was when myself, my colleague who found me the job that am working at now went for lunch break, and I have sang plenty praises and accolades about this my friend to madam about how nice he has been to me and she knew he was the one that linked me to this good job. Recalling that day, she had called me at work that shes coming to London area with her director, a lady she met in this country who also linked her to beauty and cosmetic business with a well known brand thaat they want to come and sample and sell some products at a mall there in London. So during lunch, i called madam, cos we normally go to get launch at this same mall. Omo na so I call madam oo, sey shey u dey around, sey me and my friend dey mall for lunch, if u dey around make you for meet and greet am o, she come sey she dey one eatery, make i waka come there, funny enough we were just a minute away from her. Lo and behold as i saw madam and her director, I greeted the director, then reached out to madam to introduce her to my friend, omo she just sat down there, me wen dey expect sey since u know this na my correct friend wey help my life, u go at least stand up and greet him proper, omo she didnt stand, and I could see the way my friend was nodding his head while talking to her, it shows a sign of respect, but madam didnt reciprocate, I felt somehow...after the intro we left and I called her few mins later sey why u come downgrade me like that, that you could not even greet my friend proper, in which as of one i observed her while sitting there, the cloth she wore was an eyesore, so I knew thats why she didnt stand up,so I said why you come wear this kind clothe wey I know sey u nor fit wear comot for house if I was at home, she quickly confessed that it was because of what she wore that made her not stand up to greet my friend, that she apologised, but she has something to tell me, I said what, that is it possible that I allow her to be free to wear whatever she wants, that for example because of how shes dressed, it drew attention towards her that people tend to approach her for the product while giving her commendations that they like her shape and body, that she sold more products than her director, i was like wow, and u listen to pastor JERRY every morning, if you practice the preachings and you allign by the words that you hear, do you think you approach is the best way to sell your business? That you feel using your body as an object of attraction to well market to me is an indirect process of establishing organized and professional prostitustion. She said no oo, that sebi me I know sey UK tough, and she had to use whatever way to convince customers to buy from her. It didnt end there, wetin come burst my head be sey, she come tell me to allow her be free with whatever she wants to wear, and that I should put it into writing for evidential purpose so I wont deny it in the future that I accepted, omo my hND FALL, Something wey nor fit sup for NIJA.
I stylishly agreed, and penned it down on whatsapp message that I agree, I did it because, to catch a monkey u must act like one, u cant drag anything as such as that here, cos if I disgree, she go do am anyways and it will only cause more probs, but for my mind, we never spend a year, u dun dey run crazy race, me wen use millions carry us come here na to come here come dey follow your own dirty mandates, so I just dey plan on how we go go back Nija and destroy our passports. Since that time, she dun dey wear werin she like, wey be sey my daughter come tell me one day sey she nor like wetin mummy wear comot that she had to keep dragging her shirt down to cover her bum, I Was devastated that my 10year old will have such conscience and awareness.

As he be now, I wan use style sey my 40th birthday will be celebrated in nija, if she gork the FM we all go together, na say gobe, we nor dey come back again. The recent issue wey I experience na denial of sex. I go touch am, plz plz am tired....or am not in the mood, truth be spoken, there are different reasons why a woman might feel that way, and I pretty much understand that there are certain reasons like fatigue from work, too much thoughts, cos this town na billing, she does most of the house chores, so that alone can be wearing her out, but when we dey nija, no matter how stressed, tired or mentally down she is, she go open for me, its not even about turning me down, its about the way she does it, angrily and authoritatively, na then i come dey sense sey there could be more to it, is it because I earn lesser now that I was in nija, is it because the system is changing her mentals. I come give am lamba one day, i said I dreamt u have started having feelings for someone else, (jokingly oo) she said where, in school or where, I replied the dream is not clear, so U dont know, she said is it Lanre ( the guy I complainedabout in my previous ost) I said the dream did not reveal any identity, he nor reach 12 mins after we don ditch that discussion, She just came from nowhere and said damn am honrny, something wey i never hear from her in a while, now thinking, is it because I raised the false dream story? Something aint adding up there, in which I saw on her phone dey ask the guy to borrow her 30pounds, that does not speak well to me. Nlanders does any1 have a perfectly built up story or FM to take cornishly take us bk to nija, or the one I talked about is legit and ok? Nobody knows it all, why am here. Remain blessed brothers and sister.

When I and my family are desperately looking for means to come there. Make we swap places na? You no even get problem, this one that Nigeria is getting worse everyday.

Your format is good but if you know you earn much in the UK compare to what you earning while in naija then I'll advise you stay back o,dont allow a daughter of Eve to frustrate you please. You can bring her back to naija while you'll hold on to her passport and take it with you back to the UK.

Nlanalyst:
If you need free ride from the airport to your hotel or home upon your arrival. Quote me later.
It's 100% free of charge.

So what's the catch. What's in it for you?

Pele OP..

This kain marketing style sha is wrong and it's everywhere not just UK check out female marketers in Naija , so I honestly don't think it's the location it's a personal thing, what make you think she won't wear worse over here.

The 'you listen to pastor Jerry every morning' part had me rolling in laughter.

Maybe you would feel better if she comes back to Naija because you seem to attribute all to the location but just know that it changes nothing.

You are so worried now she's within your reach, what happens when she comes back to Naija and she doesn't pick calls by mistake, or you track her location as usual and she denies being there.

Or do you want to divorce her?

As for your plan I wish you the best. wait first when you destroy the passports what next?

PoliteActivist:


So what's the catch. What's in it for you?

Nothing. Just a free service to humanity especially to diasporans who want to relocate back to our darling Naija.

Nlanalyst:
If you need free ride from the airport to your hotel or home upon your arrival. Quote me later.
It's 100% free of charge.

Na advice or wetin?

Buharidgeneral:

Na advice or wetin?

Yeah. Subtle advice that he's needed back home.

U want to forgo everything you and your children have there cos of a woman

She has tasted it, even if u bring her back here, burn her passport, she will still find her way somehow to go back.

What do u really have here waiting for you.

U want to relocate her to naija to start afresh.

It won't end well.

OP is just one of many people that have sacrificed their marriage, happiness and relationships because of Japa.
@OP, tell her you have a top job at an oil company wey dey pay X3 wey you dey earn for UK. Tell boys make them draft you confirmed letter, print am show am to your wife. Tell am say una still go dey go UK for visits. She go follow you come back.

Mr Twang ...sorry oo

This better be a dream. But have you burnt all bridges before relocating? I mean, sold everything, droped resignation letter, etc. If yes, better stay back in UK and count your wife as a 'loss'. Stomach it and move on jejely without wahala.

Even if you have not burnt all bridges, i would advise you to still stay back and move on.

As per your question, i doubt she will follow you to naija with that your format, as she's half way gone into another man's bold arms (according to what you wrote).

Bring some of your relatives in naija up to speed about your plans and reasons for it. They will give you ideas.

You can as well Say someone in your family is very sick or dying and that there is urgent need to visit naija. It must be someone of significance anyway. Else she wont move an inch.

I remember that very late evening when someone called me that MIL died. I told my wife, we left all what we were doing at home, grabbed the keys and traveled several hundreds of KM down to the village.

So.....that kind of format.

@twang414:

I think I remember your previous story.

You need to honestly ask yourself some tough questions:
- Why did I really relocate out of Nigeria?

- What was my goal of relocating to the UK? Why did I choose UK and not US, Canada or another location?

- What can I forgo to achieve my UK dream? For some, it is marriage, some is children, some is their peace of mind, some is wealth etc.

Question three is particularly important because it seems you cannot hold on to your family and the UK dream at the same time. Day in, day out, your wife puts up attitudes you find strange: if it is a lack of opportunity in Nigeria, she just 'rediscovered' herself in the YouKay or this has always been 'her'.

If for instance, you realized that you japa'ed out of peer pressure and Nigeria isn't so bad after tasting the other side (let's face it: Nigeria has not significantly improved since you left so deciding to come back means the 'insecurity' and other circumstances that drove you out of Nigeria did not really matter to you OR you have realized there are worse situations) so you want to come back.

Come back to what? Do you think your madam would want to come back or would take being deceived to come back lying low? What if she still wrecks havoc in Nigeria? What if she still decides on a divorce in Nigeria? How would you feel?

As for destruction of passports: that's spiting your nose to save your face; never ends well.

This is a serious matter.

Bro, in this life you have to think of yourself first. If you stand a better chance in the UK to succeed in life abeg stay there. Don’t put your life on hold for any woman. A woman that can’t use her sense to know whats good for her and her children in the UK will not have that sense in Nigeria. Think of urself first, marriage isn’t an achievement do not try and hold on to someone that does not want to be held. I am speaking from experience. Again think of whats good for your own progress. Loyalty is scarce these days.

The Nigeria you left is still the same. I won't support coming back home though

Nlanalyst:
If you need free ride from the airport to your hotel or home upon your arrival. Quote me later.
It's 100% free of charge.

if village ppl get account for nairaland, e go be this account

Your reasons for relocating are not clear. I think it is lame to always include healthcare as one of the main reasons for relocating out of Nigeria, especially to places like the UK. That reason has never made sense to me.

Healthcare cost may be cheaper in the UK but access ain't better (for the middle class). The only people who should be complaining of poor access are the poor villagers in Nigeria (people who don't have 20m to japa anyway).

All the private and tertiary hospitals in Lagos or Abuja are not mere monuments. They admit new patients everyday, probably faster than what you'll get in the UK, Canada, or any other developed country. In fact, Nigeria is by far the only country in the world where you can simply walk into any government hospital and see a Consultant after few minutes or hours without a prior appointment.

So I think it's time to reflect. Find a better reason to remain in the UK and continue to reinforce that belief. Remove healthcare and other related nonsense from that list unless you have a life threatening medical challenge that requires consistent funding and attention.

Btw, listening to pastor Jerry or any other new generational pastor changes nothing. They follow these programmes for the prayers and blessings they hope to get. The day pastor Jerry decides to dum.p prayer rain and requests for holiness and end time message, people like your wife will dump him. Listening to pastor Jerry is, in fact, one of the main reasons she'll continue to dress seductively. Pastor Jerry is not Pastor Kumuyi.

You should find a way to remind your wife her old time values (if she had any during her time in Naija). Environmental influences are so powerful and we can't emphasise this fact enough. The values in your new host country will most likely shape your behaviour and attitude. Today na seductive dressing, tomorrow she fit change gender or get herself a female partner.

Na you get work to do at this point o...so keep trying to talk sense into her.

Ok you are hereby given an ADVICE

twang414:
If by any reason, I regret relocating into the UK, in a way my soul swears for that man called buhari, because not only will I have been able to cope in Nigeria because I financially doing well, it just seem like the insecurity, delapitated financial, health, educational anf other sector has fallen short of catastrophic mess reason why I left. Sequel to my previous post on here, I have seen people blame me for apparently doing somethings am nt meant to do, but then no matter what I come here to discuss, na me know the intoto, and na me know exactly the toe inside the shoe wey dey pain me. The recent event of yawa that happened was when myself, my colleague who found me the job that am working at now went for lunch break, and I have sang plenty praises and accolades about this my friend to madam about how nice he has been to me and she knew he was the one that linked me to this good job. Recalling that day, she had called me at work that shes coming to London area with her director, a lady she met in this country who also linked her to beauty and cosmetic business with a well known brand thaat they want to come and sample and sell some products at a mall there in London. So during lunch, i called madam, cos we normally go to get launch at this same mall. Omo na so I call madam oo, sey shey u dey around, sey me and my friend dey mall for lunch, if u dey around make you for meet and greet am o, she come sey she dey one eatery, make i waka come there, funny enough we were just a minute away from her. Lo and behold as i saw madam and her director, I greeted the director, then reached out to madam to introduce her to my friend, omo she just sat down there, me wen dey expect sey since u know this na my correct friend wey help my life, u go at least stand up and greet him proper, omo she didnt stand, and I could see the way my friend was nodding his head while talking to her, it shows a sign of respect, but madam didnt reciprocate, I felt somehow...after the intro we left and I called her few mins later sey why u come downgrade me like that, that you could not even greet my friend proper, in which as of one i observed her while sitting there, the cloth she wore was an eyesore, so I knew thats why she didnt stand up,so I said why you come wear this kind clothe wey I know sey u nor fit wear comot for house if I was at home, she quickly confessed that it was because of what she wore that made her not stand up to greet my friend, that she apologised, but she has something to tell me, I said what, that is it possible that I allow her to be free to wear whatever she wants, that for example because of how shes dressed, it drew attention towards her that people tend to approach her for the product while giving her commendations that they like her shape and body, that she sold more products than her director, i was like wow, and u listen to pastor JERRY every morning, if you practice the preachings and you allign by the words that you hear, do you think you approach is the best way to sell your business? That you feel using your body as an object of attraction to well market to me is an indirect process of establishing organized and professional prostitustion. She said no oo, that sebi me I know sey UK tough, and she had to use whatever way to convince customers to buy from her. It didnt end there, wetin come burst my head be sey, she come tell me to allow her be free with whatever she wants to wear, and that I should put it into writing for evidential purpose so I wont deny it in the future that I accepted, omo my hND FALL, Something wey nor fit sup for NIJA.
I stylishly agreed, and penned it down on whatsapp message that I agree, I did it because, to catch a monkey u must act like one, u cant drag anything as such as that here, cos if I disgree, she go do am anyways and it will only cause more probs, but for my mind, we never spend a year, u dun dey run crazy race, me wen use millions carry us come here na to come here come dey follow your own dirty mandates, so I just dey plan on how we go go back Nija and destroy our passports. Since that time, she dun dey wear werin she like, wey be sey my daughter come tell me one day sey she nor like wetin mummy wear comot that she had to keep dragging her shirt down to cover her bum, I Was devastated that my 10year old will have such conscience and awareness.

As he be now, I wan use style sey my 40th birthday will be celebrated in nija, if she gork the FM we all go together, na say gobe, we nor dey come back again. The recent issue wey I experience na denial of sex. I go touch am, plz plz am tired....or am not in the mood, truth be spoken, there are different reasons why a woman might feel that way, and I pretty much understand that there are certain reasons like fatigue from work, too much thoughts, cos this town na billing, she does most of the house chores, so that alone can be wearing her out, but when we dey nija, no matter how stressed, tired or mentally down she is, she go open for me, its not even about turning me down, its about the way she does it, angrily and authoritatively, na then i come dey sense sey there could be more to it, is it because I earn lesser now that I was in nija, is it because the system is changing her mentals. I come give am lamba one day, i said I dreamt u have started having feelings for someone else, (jokingly oo) she said where, in school or where, I replied the dream is not clear, so U dont know, she said is it Lanre ( the guy I complainedabout in my previous ost) I said the dream did not reveal any identity, he nor reach 12 mins after we don ditch that discussion, She just came from nowhere and said damn am honrny, something wey i never hear from her in a while, now thinking, is it because I raised the false dream story? Something aint adding up there, in which I saw on her phone dey ask the guy to borrow her 30pounds, that does not speak well to me. Nlanders does any1 have a perfectly built up story or FM to take cornishly take us bk to nija, or the one I talked about is legit and ok? Nobody knows it all, why am here. Remain blessed brothers and sister.

Come quick there's alot of opportunity for u here in Nigeria please don't waste tym come this week please.

Hmm
This is serious. You need to bring her back to Nigeria, dump her there and go back to UK. Don't forget to burn her passport.
No go give yourself BP

@twang414

Your wife is the one irritating and frustrating you. Depriving you the opportunity of focusing on your forward progress.

So, own up to your responsibility of the decision of relocating don't blame any system or government.

If it is possible to get elsewhere to stay and leave her to her faith, do it. So you can focus and build up yourself again for good without any form of distraction.

Nlanalyst:
If you need free ride from the airport to your hotel or home upon your arrival. Quote me later.
It's 100% free of charge.

🎶some have food but cannot eat….some can eat but have no food 🥘…..🎶

Your wife is smart.
Any lamba u use... she go kana
Just tell her u r visiting home with ur child n her..
If she gree fine..
If she no gree..
Tell her u n ur child are gonna have to go..
If it works..
Lucky you....
If e no work....
Carry yourself alone n come back home..
When she see how it is to raise a child alone
She go send the pikin to u in naija..
See ehn...
Abroad dey change naija woman....99% of the time
Na 1 in 100 go still dry submissive after so many years..
I guess ur wife don dey give Lanre small gbenshing...
My brother apply wisdom with it..
Tell her how u feel about her dressing n denial of sex...
If she no change...
U could report to ur inlaw...
So that when u decide to take action..
Dem no go blame you ooo...

kingthreat:
OP is just one of many people that have sacrificed their marriage, happiness and relationships because of Japa.
@OP, tell her you have a top job at an oil company wey dey pay X3 wey you dey earn for UK. Tell boys make them draft you confirmed letter, print am show am to your wife. Tell am say una still go dey go UK for visits. She go follow you come back.

I love this idea

BrighterThanDay:


When I and my family are desperately looking for means to come there. Make we swap places na? You no even get problem, this one that Nigeria is getting worse everyday.

U know u r just being wasteful ask me y? Then Ur point is inconciderable,I guess u didn't get his worries.why is most black couples in abroad complaining about this same issue of trust ?

Kontri hard o





Try other continent or country o

No come back to Lagos o holdup go kill u

Wow... she come hustle pass you wey spend millions bring her...

The money she's making now, na for herself oooo

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