A friend of mine is in this dilemma. The girl is insisting he must marry her. According to the girl 10 years is no joke.

Why did your friend waste her time for 10 years?

ronkebp:

Why did your friend waste her time for 10 years?

He did not really waste her time. He kept telling her it won't work but she did not believe him. Furthermore his family like the girl so they sort of kept forcing the guy not to break up the relation. He feels trapped and has again told the girl the marriage thing won't work but she does not want to reason with him.

Of course if you date someone for ten years then you should marry her but in actual fact very few men do that.

And a woamn should also not let a man date her for more than two or three years without marriage, if she's the marrying type.

I mean after ten years of dating then marry her regardless if you're doing so out of pity.

10 years no be beans. Choi! Your friend and his babe both messed up, big time.

Can't see how he would have attempted to break up with her during the 10 years without succeeding.

He shouldn't marry her out of pity. That will be unfair on both of them in the long-run; unless of course they both don't mind being in an unhappy marriage.

Well from what you wrote he also dated her 10 years out of pity so he might as well marry her out of pity.
MENNNNNNN!!!!!!

I will not support his marrying her, it would be a living hell for both of them, they should just part ways, It is good for the girl!!! ba boyfriend ku!! oloju wonko wonko!!!, The guy don dey take mouth and body talk, she no wan know!, let your friend waka abeg!!!

Who does that? in this time and age, stick to a guy for 10 years?? no be husband faaa!!!!!!

10 years relationship, what is that, can't imagine it, did they start while they were still toddlers, lol? Anyway, I wouldn't advise the guy to marry the lady if he is indeed not in love with her, because even married people that love each other still have issues, let alone, one without equal love, but the man should in all sincerity, tell the lady, ask her if she wants a marriage in which he will be unfaithful or bad to her. But lets be realistic, if a guy can be bold enough to tell a lady that marriage btw them can't work out, what does the lady want, a lady can utter such a statement if she is annoyed or something and may not mean it, but I know men usually think so very hard before saying things like that, so it is a no win game for the lady, let the lady look for anopther person, 10 years broken relationship is far better than 1 year broken marriage or 1 year unenjoyed marriage, I tell you

Everyone hopes for a long marriage. Are you willing to keep pitying someone for an average of 30years? Break it off firmly and at the same time compassionately. Make sure you explain well that you dont love or have any feelings for her. That all this has been pity and family pressure. Just do it gradually and with time she will move on. Before you break up make sure you analyze the situation properly and look at her well. If she will make a good mother and wife then try to find it in your heart to give her a chance, and try to give it a chance. Give a 6 month trial to where she is the only one you are dating and focus on the relationship to see if your feelings change. If it doesnt then break it up. I suspect you are juggling so many ladies at once, and this is making your eyes closed to the possible jewel and blessing in your life. If you did not love her in the first instance then how did you find yourself in a relationship? Try to rekindle that love and get rid of other girl friends for now. There is something your family is seeing that you are not seeing. They know you as much as you know yourself.

^^^^^^ 2mch feelings that did not develop in 10 yrs would now develop in 3 months, naaaaaa!!!!!! it will not happen.

Whether the family like the lady or not, it is the man that would live with her.

ronkebp:

^^^^^^ 2mch feelings that did not develop in 10 yrs would now develop in 3 months, naaaaaa!!!!!! it will not happen.

The guy is lying about not having any feelings for the girl for 10years. did his family find and toast the girl for him? Did they force him into the relationship? If he is willing to tell the truth here and confess to the other relationships he has had concurrently you will be surprised. Knock on wood, dude has a woman of interest that has diverted his feelings suddenly. Something shiny and new. Now he has come to the conclusion that all those years were pity. It makes it easy for him to justiify and dispose the girl. He is just looking for confirmation and balls here. Old babe is probably aware, and is not willing to sacrifice her investment in the dude for anyone. He should just be truthful to himself. He would have chased this girl away a long time ago if he seriously did not have any feelings for her. 10years?! He is pitying her but i bet he is still chopping her too. Pity sex abi? . He is as much to blame as she is.

^^^^ that is the problem, definitely, he has another woman on the side and he is comparing and contrasting, though i still feel strongly that he does not have feelings for her, he has been holding on to her because of the good comments he is getting about her and the ''thing'' she is giving him on the side, maybe he enjoys her kpekulogical characteristics.

@poster
if she did stand that long then she can stand another 10yrs, where is she gonna go?! abeg!!!!
that gal is trapped and cannot leave. if she does then she is doing HIM a favor so that he can simply tell everyone that SHE left him, lol!

at least she got 10good years of happiness, let her go and settle for Mr Anybody.

not all men are "ready" for marriage, not all man are made for marriage. . . . . . . so, no matter how most women focus solely on marriage, they may end up with such man.

..

2mch:

The guy is lying about not having any feelings for the girl for 10years. did his family find and toast the girl for him? Did they force him into the relationship? If he is willing to tell the truth here and confess to the other relationships he has had concurrently you will be surprised. Knock on wood, dude has a woman of interest that has diverted his feelings suddenly. Something shiny and new. Now he has come to the conclusion that all those years were pity. It makes it easy for him to justiify and dispose the girl. He is just looking for confirmation and balls here. Old babe is probably aware, and is not willing to sacrifice her investment in the dude for anyone. He should just be truthful to himself. He would have chased this girl away a long time ago if he seriously did not have any feelings for her. 10years?! He is pitying her but i bet he is still chopping her too. Pity sex abi? . He is as much to blame as she is.

thank you o!!! ronkebp, no mind the lying friend. your friend dated the girl for a whole 10years!!!! he kept telling the gal that it would not work for 10 whole yrs,  but he continued dating and chopping the girl anytime that he wants for 10 whole yrs, he did not start dating another girl in all this 10years to prove to her and the so-called family that he is serious with stepping out of the relationship.

na now him wake up realise say him no love the girl, NONSENCE you friend has seen something else which he thinks is better. if he can date her for 10years out of pity, then he should go ahead and marry her out of pity for dating her for 10years nah tink about all the time the gal must have put in the relationship, her investment, her encouragement, her body, her money( maybe), plenty oother things. abi things don better for the boy now and he realised that the gal is no longer "his type". he should lie on the bed he laid on and not look for any supported club

i wonder why a  woman will date a guy for 10years and the guy no marry you .

^^^ bro, if you date a gal but tell her you would never marry her, YET, she still hangs around and hands over her toto whenever you want. . . . . . .  would you turn it down if you had no other gal?!

obviously this man has a problem with marriage (with her), the fact that she kept throwing her toto at him like a frisbee, is the problem here, NOT the guy who happily chop the toto.
was she forced into staying in this union? was she forced into handing over the toto?

the guy said clearly that it wont work and there is NO REASON why that should change (10yrs or not)

MRbrownJAY:

^^^ bro, if you date a gal but tell her you would never marry her, YET, she still hangs around and hands over her toto whenever you want. . . . . . . would you turn it down if you had no other gal?!

obviously this man has a problem with marriage (with her), the fact that she kept throwing her toto at him like a frisbee, is the problem here, NOT the guy who happily chop the toto.
was she forced into staying in this union? was she forced into handing over the toto?

the guy said clearly that it wont work and there is NO REASON why that should change (10yr or not)

he told his friend that HE TOLD HER, the friend jus gave us reported speeh o! why is it that he did not keep another girlfriend openly and let everybody know that he has moved on, in that case if the gal decide to give am free chopping, guy go gladly chop and clean mouth. i have a cousin who was a true born player, he had this gal that he dated for 4years, he constantly told the girl that he wouldnt marry her, we all loved this gal, but he didnt love her that much and kept telling her. Nothing wey this gal no dey do for my cuz.

Guess what, the moment he found a gal he loved and later married, he started dating the gal openly!!! didnt hide anything. at the beginning of his new relationship, he was still chopping as long as the other babe drop. But after a while he stopped and moved on with his the new gal. There is no need wasting a gals time, if na chop you wan chop>>>STOP FIRMING DATING and dont drag it on for 10years, that is deceit

bro,  it's called: "to have your cake and eat it too". why should this man drop such a great situation?

if a man openly tells a gal he wont marry her, but she still sends the "frisbee" his way, why shouldnt he chop it? the joke is on the gal who think he will change, not on the HONEST guy!

10 years?? let me ask you what you would do if it was your sister in question!!!!! The guy is wicked and the girl is foolish, sorry for my choice of word.

i am sorry to say that it's HER life, HER choices and therefore i would have no say in the matter because SHE is the only one that will live that life (thats if i had a sista of course)

people should live with the consequences of their actions. . . . . . if she decided that it was ok to stay in this r/ship, knowing fully well that it was NOT marriage bound, then she has only herself to blame in this story.

MRbrownJAY:

i am sorry to say that it's HER life, HER choices and therefore i would have no say in the matter because SHE is the only one that will live that life (thats if i had a sista of course)

people should live with the consequences of their actions. . . . . . if she decided that it was ok to stay in this r/ship, knowing fully well that it was NOT marriage bound, then she has only herself to blame in this story.

This seems personal to you. Dude, are you Blackcat 1 . Yea right, am sure you will be silently strategizing how to off the guy except you dont have sisters. No one wants to see their sisters in pain and cry. Not to talk of your daughters. Before you lead anyone on, remember that your daughter could be in that situation. What if she commits suicide? Some people kill themselves over stuffs like this. I think people should be open, firm and fair in their dealings as early as possible. If you know you cant marry her, stop kpoxing her. A psycho will kill you one day you mess with the wrong person.

obviously the lady didnt wash some toto inside his stew.


that's why he's gallivanting all over the place after refusing to marry her for ten years.



if he keeps refusing she should move on jare.

tpia@:

obviously the lady didnt wash some toto inside his stew.


that's why he's gallivanting all over the place after refusing to marry her for ten years.



if he keeps refusing she should move on jare.

Tpia has killed me with laugh oooooooooo, egbami !!!!!!!!!!!! if she washes it into his stew how do you expect the man to succeed in life??

if she was throwing her toto at him like frisbee then she might as well have just thrown it into his stew

imo, a man looking for success doesnt date a woman for ten years then leave her hanging?

tpia@:

obviously the lady didnt wash some toto inside his stew.


that's why he's gallivanting all over the place after refusing to marry her for ten years.



if he keeps refusing she should move on jare.

ronkebp:

Tpia has killed me with laugh oooooooooo, egbami !!!!!!!!!!!! if she washes it into his stew how do you expect the man to succeed in life??

Only a crazy person will do this.   . There is Aids and STD this days, make una sofry sofry o.

2mch:

This seems personal to you. Dude, are you Blackcat 1 . Yea right, am sure you will be silently strategizing how to off the guy except you dont have sisters. No one wants to see their sisters in pain and cry. Not to talk of your daughters. Before you lead anyone on, remember that your daughter could be in that situation. What if she commits suicide? Some people kill themselves over stuffs like this. I think people should be open, firm and fair in their dealings as early as possible. If you know you cant marry her, stop kpoxing her. A psycho will kill you one day you mess with the wrong person.

whoever ¨Blackcat¨is, he is not ME.
bro, well before this charade had reached 10yrs, i would have simply asked my sista/daughter what were her plans with this guy. . . . . . . whatever her answer would have been, i would have been ok with it.
if my sister (or brother) wants to be in such r/ship then it is none of my business, so long as what they do aint criminal or illegal.

if she commits suicide then it sure shouldnt be blamed on the guy solely, abi he put a knife to her damn throat?! or you want me to put on a ninja suit and go threaten this guy to marry her, or else? lol!

who would even want to marry someone who DOESNT WANT TO MARRY THEM?! beats me.

bro, we all know women and their tricks, the majority get some deadbeat guy who has ONE quality while the rest of him is fukced up BUT they most think they can A) change the guy or B) he would change after time/marriage.

onçy ONE person to blame here because enjoying someone s toto (handed to you on a platter) is still not against the law.

tpia@:

obviously the lady didnt wash some toto inside his stew.
that's why he's gallivanting all over the place after refusing to marry her for ten years.

if he keeps refusing she should move on jare.

if he clean his balls in her next meal, do you think that would make her finally leave?!
people and the urban legends, lol!
wash toto ko. wash nyansh ni!

btw what has SUCCESS got to do with someone dating for 10yrs?!

if rinsing toto has the magical effect of parking the man's butt inside the woman's yansh, then why would washing his balls work differently?


as per urban legend- as redsun smartly pointed out while high on weed, rinsing toto gives you the same vitamins you get from oral s.ex.

tpia@:

if rinsing toto has the magical effect of parking the man's butt inside the woman's yansh, then why would washing his balls work differently?


as per urban legend- as redsun smartly pointed out while high on weed, rinsing toto gives you the same vitamins you get from oral s.ex.

if only we could get the same PLEASURE eating this food, as when we eat toto. . . . . . . . helas!

^^I guess you do else there wouldnt be a market for it.

same basic ingredient element- just that some males get theirs raw from the source while others get the bottled version which had been warmed up from the fridge.

potato, potahtoe.



little difference of a few minutes delivery or so.

^^i sincerely hope you are joking and that most sistas dont believe in this nastiness.
how could she clean her toto in the soup, that shiit will burn her coochie so bad that she will never try this nonsense again.

@thread
when you accept "LITTLE" in life, thats what you end up with.

^^bottled version.