I'll not be writing a whole lot (I wish) but I thought a thread on this will be helpful. First, i'll like to say i'm not a writer so don't crucify me if i go off topic at times or err (damn tablet), i'm just an observer and concerned citizen, hear me out

I'm appalled by the way nairaland has been turned to a war zone among the different ethnic groups with the Yoruba's and Igbo's being the most guilty in this modern warfare over the internet.

With that said, i'm not here to blame anyone or take sides but to understand and identify the cause of these problems and for us to find a solution to it. My reason for bringing this up is that, I remember and reminisce about my childhood in lagos and how my parents frowned at my friendship with Igbos. While they thought they had good reasons for their negative perceptions of southerners, I totally disagreed and my mom and I got into it over my friends.

I didn't want my life to be shaped by prejudice especially the ones other people had and not my own direct experience. I believed and still believe that everyone should be treated as an individual and not judged based on some bad experiences others had, in this case my parents. Lets look at it this way, who is your friend or family? The one who denied you water when you were thirsty and kicked you out in the street or the one who gave you food when you were hungry? The answers are pretty straightforward isn't it?

While I've never had such experiences (at least none that I remember), and maybe some have, maybe not but will it be appropriate to simply hate or dislike someone who has done you no wrong simply because they are culturally different from you? Or because of what somebody else told you? My common sense tells me no (hopefully it's common :p) and I don't see any other appropriate answer to that.

I remember 'chemist' as a child (the pharmacist), Nneka my best friend whom we walked to school together, my closest buddy whom we play hide and seek together and so on. I mean common guys, we all have had experiences both positives and negatives within and outside of our ethnic groups and it's painful that at this age, we can't come together and fight the common enemy. This enemy isn't nneka or the 'chemist' neither is the enemy shola or dayo.

We know who they are and the earlier we come together and accept that we can't cut of that part of our body just because it hurts, the better we will be in identifying and fighting justly for our rights. I believe this generation can make a difference for the ones to come with the exposure and access to these technologies all around us. Whether we like it or not, we owe it to our children and the ones unborn to make it right and we can only do it together as one. 

Whether Nigeria splits or not, we still need one another, gone are the days when a country tries to do it by itself, the world is global now, take America and China as an example. If that's not enough, would you not help your nephew or niece who is a product of brother chinedu and Aunt Remi's union? Would you let the innocent and helpless generations be caught in the crossfire solely because you refused to accept Tunji or chuks as a family?

Time to sheath the sword and we can do greater things together. It ain't wrong to love your tribe but please lets respect other tribes while doing so. Treat others how we want them to treat us. My Igbo bros and Sis, lets live peacefully while identifying the true cause of our problems.  Lets stop the hate.

Your write up is enough to pull at the strings of anybody's heart. You are right, all this hate between us need to stop someday and what better day than today as we read what you wrote.
I was fortunate to grow up in an inter-tribal household and then have friends and acquaintances from different tribes. I guess this and the upbringing I got have helped mold me into the tolerant person I am.

I just wish people will be respectful of other people's opinions, religion, culture etc if we are to have peace. No culture or people are more superior than others. Once we get this fact buried in our heads, maybe a change will come.

Oh well, I know I will teach my future children that with tolerance and respect comes peace and love.

@pslm23
  Thanks for that. I was hoping we all can open our hearts and understand the changes we seek has to start from us and no other time than now. I make my mom understand that even though she had her reasons for going against my friendship with other tribes, these people acted like a brother to me and I just wanna show them the love back which is only normal.

Can this be moved to the front page mod?

@poster,

Your sentiments are understandable. I feel your heart and I'm not going to discourage your initiative but the action you are calling for, reconciliation, is truly a political issue, not a cultural one.

Personally I see that you are talking from your childhood environment of growing up with other children in the community and forming bonds of trusts and the intimacies that exist and how that impacts your outlook on the Yoruba/Igbo relationship. You have failed to look at a general and much broader community of Yoruba/Igbo citizens. There are gains already made which would be reversed by going in the direction you demand. This is why I said its a political issue and far above what you have the capacity to alter. This should in no way affect your intimacies with your friends, continue to love and share with one another.

@Negro_Ntns

Ok here's my take on that. You're right this is political, and while i'm not gonna deny that there have been gains associated with this either directly or indirectly, it shouldn't take away the fact that something needs to be done and fast too. Also a point to note is that, we're not gaining from this as much as we're being made to believe and think or how else do you explain the bad roads you and i have to ride on everyday? The numerous loss of lives that could have been avoided? (maybe otherwise if you're in the government or relative is but can we all be?) I lost 2 members of my family to the system that failed you and I.

Hundreds of thousands of lives have been lost like that and more dying yet we still can't get our priorities right. We look at our yoruba/igbo neighbor with hatred while this common enemy continues to milk us and maltreat us. The armed men are not visiting because i'm yoruba or igbo neither am i being denied proper health care because of my ethnicity. Our leaders are not failing us because they are yoruba or igbo or whatever ethnicity, they are failing because they know they can and will continue to get away with it as long as you and I think this way.

Mods can you move this to the front page please? I didn't think it will be this hard to get this to the front page.

This would have more views if it was about Tonto Dike