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Your thoughts please

Let me tell you personal experience…

My ex wife once suggested that we should start plans to have our own house. She said we should buy land first, then build later.

At that time, we were living in a three bedroom flat. It was my duty to provide the house and I was doing that without stress. The place was good. We had two kids and space was not a problem at all.

One day she told me she had seen a land close to where we lived. I said that was fine, but I was clear with her. I told her I did not have money to buy land at that time.

She then said buying the land would not be a problem. That was when she told me she had some money from her job and she could pay for the land. Her idea was that she would buy the land and I would build later.

I did not reject the idea. I told her I would think about it. After some time, I agreed. I said since you have the money now, let us go and see the land. She arranged everything.

We went together and met the land owner directly. The land was affordable and after talking back and forth, we agreed on a price and paid.

When it was time to do the papers, I told them to write only her full name. I told them my name should only be there as a witness. I did this on purpose. I knew her character. I told her clearly that it was her land.

I said we were already living comfortably and there was no rush to own a house. I said I would help with building slowly, but the house would still be hers.

Before all this, she had once asked me a question. She asked if I would move into a house owned by my wife. I told her clearly, no.

So even when we agreed on this plan, in my mind I knew the truth. That house was not ours. It was hers, even if I spent money building it.

She gave me all the land papers to keep. I kept them safe.

Just one week later, we had an argument at home. In anger, my supposed wife said something I will never forget. She said do not worry, let us finish that house first and you will see how I will deal with you.

I was not shocked. I already knew. I did not argue. I simply went to where I had kept the land papers safe, brought them out and handed them to her.

I told her when you finish the house, put it on rent or use it for business. Do whatever you like with it. But don’t ever think we will move in there as family.

That was it.

I have seen many cases like this with other men too. This is not theory. This is lived experience.

So I will say it again. Do not move into a woman’s house unless you are ready to lose your authority as a man.

A woman is first a woman before she is anything else. Her nature, instincts, and needs come first, everything else comes after, especially when dealing with a man.

Yes, a man should have authority at home as the leader. That authority cannot stand when you hand over your duty to your wife and call it being woke.

🤷‍♂️ - TheOdin11

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These things are not 100%..it may not work for but it may work for someone..I will never forget my former neighbour, the husband lost his job became broke, the woman was doing everything, I knew because the husband is my friend,so anytime we have things to contribute in the compound, when you go to their flat,the wife will tell you to wait till evening that when the husband returns he will pay,in the evening the woman will give money to the husband to pay...so please good woman dey,bad ones na many pass...bad men dey,bad ones na still many pass..as a human being try to be able to fend for yourself first before marriage whether you are a man or woman have something doing oo...e get why