A mother had these words for her 3 daughters after their weddings, "My beauties, don't forget to text me your experience of the first night, " After 1 week, the 1st. daughter sent an sms "NESCAFE" to the Mum while the 2nd txt "BENSON & HEDGES". The Mum, bemused by the messages, picked her tin of Nescafe and read from the label "Fantastic till the last drop". She also went to her hubby's packet of cigarette, written on it was "Extra Long, King size", She blushed! For their age she wasn't much worried but decided to wait for her 3rd daughter's experience. After a few days, she received a PostCard which was written "Arik: Lagos-Kano". She quickly called ARIK Air Information Desk and was told "It's 3 times daily, 7 days a week & 75 minutes flight both ways". She just slumped & fainted! this man go kill my daughter! =)).

In an alcohol factory the regular taster died
and the director started looking for a new
one to hire. A drunkard with ragged,dirty look came to apply for the position. The director of the factory wondered how to send him away. They tested him,gave him a glass with a drink. He tried it and said, "It's
red wine, a muscat, three years old, grown on a north slope, matured in steel containers." "That's correct", said the boss. Another glass. "It's red wine, cabernet, eight years old, a south western slope, oak barrels." "Correct."
The director was astonished. He winked at his secretary to suggest something. She brought in a glass of urine. The alcoholic tried it. "It's a blonde, 26 years old, three months pregnant, made inside the work office. And if you don't give me the job, I'll also tell who's the father!" The boss replied you ve got the job.

Nice one!

9days 2 val, and guys are already changing their ringtones from U MUST CHOP MY MONEY to WHETHER NA ONE NAIRA, ABI NA ONE MILLION, BABY U GOT ME, BABY U GOT ME. guyz wit wayoooooooo.

A professor at the University was giving a lecture on the supernatural.

To get a feel for his audience, he asks “How many people here believe in ghosts?”
About 90 students raised their hands.

“Well, that’s a good start. Out of those of you who believe in ghosts, do any of you think you’ve seen a ghost?”
About 40 students raised their hands.

“That’s really good. I’m really glad you take this seriously. Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost?”
About 15 students raise their hands.
“Has anyone here ever touched a ghost?”
3 students raise their hands. “That’s fantastic.

Now let me ask you one question further. Have any of you ever made love to a ghost?”
Way in the back, Akpos raised his hand.
The professor takes off his glasses, and says, “All the years I’ve been giving this lecture; no one has ever claimed to have made love to a ghost. You’ve got to come up here and tell us about your experience.”

The big redneck student replied with a nod and a grin, and began to make his way up to the podium. When he reached the front of the room, the professor asks, “So, tell us what it’s like to have s*ex with a ghost?”
He replied, “Ghossst?
Shiiiiit! From way back there I thought you said,”Goats!”

Lol at first joke and guys changing their ring tone!

haha dude u got me cracking up! more! more!

Hahahaahahahhaah, Laff wan make me lose my D1ck Donkoline. . . . . Nice jokes collection

nice jokes i cant stop laughing

^^^

me too!