Efemena_xy: ^^ Lol!

Wahala dey house indeed-ee!!

Ishi, Oya come out now? E never do you??...I don't know how much longer I can keep the crowd your fans from baying for your er...er...

Patience Mena, plx...

Ishilove:
Shhhhh....the Honourable and I are verrrry busy at the moment. Pls come back later

*giggles from behind the door*. O Honourable, you animal, you!!

Lol!in ilaje. So hw's d experiment? Is his fingers equivalent to d engine room?

Ishilove: Patience Mena, plx...

@Ishi dearie, I'm in no way related to the first lady...so, yala!

brokoto: movie advert: *in segun arinze's voice*
She promised. . .to update her story on the 31st of october.
One week and 2 pages of chit chat later, the story has not been updated
Who knows what happened in ROOM 21
stay tuned. . .
anyway, you've got mail

Bt this time tomorrow I will update. Sorry for the delay. You've gat mail

albacete:
ishi, are u sitting on a long thing?

The tin is overlong

Ishilove:
The tin is overlong

OMG! No wonder u've been quiet since.
Oya update us with immediate alacrity.

Ishilove: "Goodday sir,Akure sir", I said woodenly to Chairman as he looked up inquiringly at me. When us corpers were asking for lifts, we went straight to the point. Chairman graciously opened the door despite my stony countenance and I got in. I didn't care if my demeanout put him off, I just wanted to get the hell out Wasimi, take a gaddem break before I found myself in "the market", as my brothers would put it.

Wasimi is about twenty-five minutes from Akure, and I was determined to maintain a stony silence till I got to my destination, because my nocturnal adventure had left a sour taste in my mouth in addition to leaving me with a bruised lip and aching shoulders. Chairman tried to put me at ease, regaling me with tales from his own youth service days. Chairman served in '73 or 75 (can't recall now). He said during his days, the government transported the prospective corp members from their home states by flight! After service, they were given car loans and civil service appointments. On hearing this unbelievable tale, I gradually forgot my troubles and started to relax.

Chairman was the inaugral local government chairman of Efon local government area where I served. I really don't know I'd I should be mentioning this. . .

Anyhow!

According to him, he and his cronies lobbied with the then military government for the creation of Efon Local government out of Ondo west,and as a result of his efforts, he was popularly elected into office during the 1999 elections, making him the pioneer chairman of Efon LGA.

While he was talking, I was wondering why his car was so modest considering the nature of Nigerian politicians. I then concluded that either he was lying, he was seriously 'coding', or he belonged to the almost non-existent class of honest Nigerian politicians.

During that short journey, he gave me a lot of scandalous and vexing inside scoop on the inner workings of Nigerian politics in general and Ondo politics in particular. I would have been greatly incensed at what I was hearing if I gave a flying fucck about politics, but since I don't give TWO flying fuccks about politics, I simply "oohed" and "harrumped" about the deplorable state of the nation and enjoyed the passing scenery.

I noticed that Chairman alternated his attention between the road and my face. People say I have a 'interesting' looking face,so I put his stares down to curiousity.

When I told him where I was headed, he offered to drive me beyond Akure, right to Owo garage where I could get a vehicle going to Ikare at a cheaper rate. Such a nice man. . .

When we got to Akure, he couldn't remember the route so we rigmaroled town a bit before we were finally able to locate Owo garage. Even when we got to the garage, he made sure I boarded a vehicle before he finally drove off, but not after collecting my number and promising to check up on me to know if I had gotten to my destination safely.

Such a nice man. . .

In a much lighter mood, I made my way to Ikare where I spent a most relaxing weekend with my friend. We stayed indoors like two old retirees, gisting, taking leisurely strolls and catching up on old times. A refreshing weekend in civilisation

Back in Wasimi three days later, on a Wednesday morning to be precise, my phone rang and surprise surprise, who do we have here?, Chairman! I was surprised because he hadn't called as he had promised and I had forgotten him as soon as I landed in Ikare-Akoko. He enquired after weekend vacation, my well being and the state of affairs in Wasimi. I responded in the positive to all his enquiries. He asked if I was free later in the afternoon,to which I also responded in the positive. He reminded me of his promise to take me out to savour the sights and sounds of ancient Ondo town, to which I, beginning to feel weighed down again, took him up on it. We agreed on a spot where he would pick me up and he rang off.

Glad that I would be having a change of environment so soon after my weekend trip, I looked forward to noonday. When it was time, I primped myself up for the outing, feeling light and gay. "Yes", rejoiced I within me,"another outing!". It was that bad. For a simple sight-seeing tour with an elderly gentleman to excite me that much just shows how starved I was for a change of scenery

With the sun shining brightly on my back,the gentle breeze subtly kissing my face, I walked jauntily past some youths who had gathered to watch a world cup match in front of the store next to my living quarters. I walked to the agreed spot and waited for Chairman to come pick me. I didn't have to wait long before chairman drove up. I walked up to the vehicle, got in, greeted my bushy browed, kindly faced elderly tour guide and settled down to enjoy the ride. Chairman put the vehicle in gear and drove off. Into a most unpleasantly memorable afternoon for the both of us


I will continue my tale after I have massaged my fingers, they cramp painfully

U shouldn't have revealed d identity of chairman, someone might stumble on this story and use it against him... Cuz, I did a simple google search wt d info u supplied us wt... and his identify was revealed... Y not modify dat part of ur post?

Ishilove: The first thing I noticed about The Honourable was his teeth...so big, brown and shiny... Does anyone remember Donkey from the Shrek series? Honourable's teeth were by far more impressive than that of the famous cartoon character. I found myself staring at the teeth. . .

"Ajuwaya", Honourable hailed jovially

I forcefully tore my eyes away from all that teeth.

"Sir," I answered nervously. Who was this obviously important man? Why did he stop this impressive convoy for lil 'ol me?

"Are you going towards Akure?", he asked.

I bobbed my head rapidly. "Yes sir,Akure sir" I answered with great enthusiasm.

"Okay, let me drop you off corper", he said, and smiled.

I almost jerked involuntarily but caught myself just in time. My goodness, so much teeth!

He motioned for his PA(?) to help me with my bags. The grumpy man all but snatched the bags from my hands and went over to the boot. While all these were happening, other road users kept a cautious distance away from the convoy because in this country of ours, government convoys mean trouble. Passing motorists gave me curious glances and I must admit I felt a tad funky with all the attention I was getting

As I got in and sat down beside the Honourable, I heard Mr PA wreaking havoc on my grocery bag and awkward blue basket in the boot of the car. My hackles rose as I silently fumed: Hey watch it assshole, don't mess with the tomatoes!!! It better not burst and soak my gari because I can't come to Ondo market TWICE on top of gari matter o!!!!

More rustling and grating sounds...

Fool don't break the basket, I can't be having rat shiit in ma plates!!! .

I honestly don't know what they had kept back there in the boot that warranted this kind of manhandling of my innocent bags and basket

To my utmost relief, he didn't wrestle long with my bags. He shut the boot, motioned to the preceding cars in the convoy to start moving and re-entered the vehicle. I gave the back of his head a surreptitious glare from the top of my glasses before turning my attention back to the Honourable.

The Honourable was a very pleasant fellow and a lively conversationist. He asked me where I was serving and when I told him it was in Kind Comprehensive College, Wasimi, he asked me where in God's sunny Ondo Wasimi was located. I didn't blame him for asking. Even a lot of folks down yonder area didn't know where Wasimi was.

He introduced himself as Honourable so and so. I will not mention his name because he is still a serving officer in the Mimiko-led administration and he will go into an athsmatic fit if he should come across his name in a public forum such as this. However,I will mention that in addition to being a high ranking officer in the government, he is also a member of the Ondo states sports council. A very important one.

I must say I was very impressed. A humble "government pikin" like me sitting beside such an important personality and interacting with him, wow, wait till The Guys hear about this!

He told me that he picked me up because when he was a corp member, he vowed he would help corp members anywhere he came across them because of the wonderful treatment he was given by his host community. He served about twenty years ago in the old Rivers state (present day Bayelsa state). He said that even whenever he was able to make time out of his busy schedule to visit them, they still called him "corper", twenty years after!

Throughout the journey I couldn't relax because in the back of my mind's eye I could see that large, white, rusty welcome signboard looming ahead. I just wished this vehicle would zoom past the signboard and take me far away to more exciting climes. To pictureseque places where sunflies and goats didn't outnumber humans about a zillion to one.

If wishes were horses though, beggars would ride like thunder. . .

All too soon the journey came to an end.

When the convoy pulled up in front of the sign that said "Welcome to Wasimi, the place of rest", Honourable rolled down his window and sunlight instantly flooded the car's semi-dark interior. He leaned sideways and squinted out at the downward slopy road that led to the bush hamlet. He then turned to me and asked, " So this is where a pretty girl like you is holed up?? How are you coping?" I simply shrugged and answered, " what choice do I have?"

He shook his head in wonder and remarked that NYSC was no longer what it used to be. He thereafter asked for my phone number so that he could "occasionally check up on me". I hesitated, my recent experience with another politician still fresh in my mind. When he noticed my hesitation, he gave me one of his startlingly toothy grins and asked if I was scared. Since I didn't want to be rude to this very important man, I obliged him.

After I had successfully crossed the road to begin my downward descent into the dreary Land of Sunflies,Turkeys and Goats, I looked back once to stare at the receding vehicles. I was very sure I would never hear from my new, big toothed friend.

I couldn't have been more wrong. . .

U have to be stingy wit d description of these politicians, D̶̲̥̅̊ε̲̣̣̣̥γ̴̴̲̣̣͡ would do anytin, and I repeat anytin to look Ǧ☺☺ϑ and they don't like seeing their names associated with stories like this... Biko(pls), ishi love...

legendprac:

U shouldn't have revealed d identity of chairman, someone might stumble on this story and use it against him... Cuz, I did a simple google search wt d info u supplied us wt... and his identify was revealed... Y not modify dat part of ur post?

now you just gave the idea to us to google him too

legendprac:

U have to be stingy wit d description of these politician, D̶̲̥̅̊ε̲̣̣̣̥γ̴̴̲̣̣͡ would do anytin, and I repeat anytin to look Ǧ☺☺ϑ and they don't like seeing their names associated with stories like this... Biko(pls), ishi love...

abeg stop scaring my sweetheart jo. i no like am o

brokoto: now you just gave the idea to us to google him too abeg stop scaring my sweetheart jo. i no like am o

Oga, I no dey scare am. She be my sweetrat,sorry heart too..ℓ☺ℓ. Hence, d warning....

She didn't do a gud work of hiding the identity of those men...

For honourable, if she removes d bit abt him also being a member of d sports council, it would help...

Ishilove, I no wan hear say complications enter,cuz our politicians no D̶̲̥̅̊ε̲̣̣̣̥γ̴̴̲̣̣͡ laugh @ all Oº°˚˚°..

Just stumbled on this thread and am sooooooo loving it,cant wait to knw what happened in ROOM 21 nice work ishiluv

legendprac:

U shouldn't have revealed d identity of chairman, someone might stumble on this story and use it against him... Cuz, I did a simple google search wt d info u supplied us wt... and his identify was revealed... Y not modify dat part of ur post?

You google searched?? Lol, U have time. Her readers, orshould I speak for myself, understand this and I doubt anyone took the pains to google him.
You sound like a yahoo boy

legendprac:

U have to be stingy wit d description of these politicians, D̶̲̥̅̊ε̲̣̣̣̥γ̴̴̲̣̣͡ would do anytin, and I repeat anytin to look Ǧ☺☺ϑ and they don't like seeing their names associated with stories like this... Biko(pls), ishi love...

Abeg stop the scaremongering jor!

No one's interested in finding out who the dude is.

We're only interested in Ishi's story, which is meant to be nothing more than light-hearted fun!

Mr legendprac, I am aware of the complications that can arise from revealing too much about a serving political holder. That's why Honourable's name is not mentioned. As for Chairman,I don't know what your google search brought out but what ever it is, it is very wrong. He is no longer a public office holder, and besides, I changed one or two things about him so no one can ever find out who he is. Believe me when I say that.

When is the next update coming now?! Small time now u go begin abuse my beloved Ogun State I vex for you, new update better be here sharpish!

naijababe: When is the next update coming now?! Small time now u go begin abuse my beloved Ogun State I vex for you, new update better be here sharpish!

Tomorrow, God willing. Abeg no vex

"Like a lamb being led to the slaughter house. . .like a lamb being led to the slaughter house". I couldn't shake these words out of my head. The words had surfaced from the blues when I beheld the retreating broad back of my guest once he turned away from the reception and moved into the corridor leading to Rm21. I tried racking my brains to try to figure out where I had read these words but I couldn't concentrate because too many thoughts were competiting for my attention. . .

Why on earth did he bring his nasty PA on this journey?? I could see the scorn in his eyes each time he looked at me, the look that clearly said "these useless corper girls."

Would he be a gentleman like he had always been in previous dates? In my experience, when a man says he wants to 'relax' with you, it only means one thing. The first time it happened to me, I had gone with my coursemate to a bar close to Unilag. After a few drinks and nkwobi, he suggested we go upstairs (it was a hotel and bar) to go and 'relax'. I innocently followed him upstairs. I won't bore you with details of what went down, but needless to say that I came out of the room in shock and considerably more dishevelled in appearance than when I entered.

Perhaps he would be a complete gentleman like he had always been. We would discuss politics, the economy and history like we always did whenever we met. Yes, perhaps. . .

Now folks, I know what y'all are thinking; that I was deceiving myself by thinking that a full blooded male locked up with a young, delectable female would discuss the state of the nation and not attempt to get overfamiliar with the more sensitive parts of her anatomy. Perhaps you are right. Perhaps I was subconsciously trying to block out the warning signs because some perverse part of me wanted push the limits. That dark part of me was curious to see how far I was willing to go with the Honourable. That part revelled in mischief and was eager to explore.

". . .I do not understand my own actions. . .that which I hate I find myself doing it. . . Woe is me". (Rom 7.NKJV)

The adrenaline rush that had being fuelling me all afternoon reached new highs when I entered Rm21. There was a big double bed laid with a really fancy bedspread at the corner of the room. A large flat screen television hung on the wall opposite the bed. A wall mural hung next to the television. A telephone rested on a glass table that stood beside the wall The coffee coloured rug was very plush, the leather chairs by the wall even more plush. The room smelt heavenly and the AC was on at full blast, like we were being expected. Even in the midst of my adrenaline intoxication, I was able to minister to my treacherous heart to slow down and start beating normally.

My date crossed the room and dropped his briefcase on the bedside table. He then turned to me and smiled. I immediately averted my eyes and focused it elsewhere.

"What would you like to take?," enquired my host. I replied that I wouldn't mind taking anything. After gently chiding me that "anything" meant "nothing", he picked up the hotel extension and ordered pounded yam and efo riro soup with goat meat.

I groaned inwardly. Pounded yam?? How could I eat pounded yam when the waist band of my trousers was nearly cutting me in two? I would have to find a way of discreetly unbuckling my belt and undoing the jean buttons if I was going to eat that meal. I elegantly rose up and pretended to be interested in the wall mural. The artist must have been a very mischievous one because the painting depicted some women with extremely large buttocks dancing.

I was surreptitiously undoing the clasps of my confining attire when Honourable spoke up from the bed.

"You like art?", he asked. My hands paused in their fumbling. I could feel his eyes on my own buttocks. He must have been comparing mine with those of the woman in the painting. I smiled grimly, for once thankful to God for blessing me with flat buttocks.

I turned to face him. "Yes, I do, very much indeed . . .(his name)".

"I find art very boring," he said and yawned expansively, giving me a eyeful of gigantic teeth.

Mesmerised, I stared at his mouth until he was done yawning.

"You seem to like staring at me. Am I so handome?", he joked, and flashed his massive pearly browns.

God help me.

I shook myself and hastily turned back to the painting. Good heavens, the teeth on that man!

"You don't have asss at all" he observed. Yep, you read right. He said ASSS.

"I know I don't have," I said, thoroughly amused. He declared that it was a good thing I I didn't have a big butt because I would look too heavy. He went further to state that everything that should have been at the back went to the front. When he said this he was leering. I bristled and glared at him but he was too busy staring at my aggressively perky bosoms to notice.

Deliberately, I turned back to the painting. Let him stare at my buttless back and leave my breasty front alone.

"Why are you standing way over there, baby?" , he complained, when he got tired of of staring at my behind. "Come join me here let's talk".

I laughed inwardly. Not on your life, mister! Thankfully room service chose that moment to bring our meal. When room service had left us alone, he insisted we eat together. I had no choice but to join him at the dining area. While we ate, we chatted about everything and nothing in particular.

He wanted to know why my glasses were so bent. I proceeded to narrate the tale of my nocturnal adventure with the coughing goat. After having a good laugh, he said matter-of-factly that we would see a well known optician at Maxivision, Abuja to run some tests on my eyes and get me a new pair of glasses. He proceeded to make plans that included me in them. Plans for trips, plans for vacations, plans for redeployment and so forth. He assumed I was already his. Yeah, right.

After the meal, he went to the bed while I sat down on the chair facing the bed.

We stared in each other's direction. Or to be more precise, I stared at his fingers; those longy, fleshy fingers, while he stared at my chest.

"Come here my dear," he said, and patted the bed beside him where he sat. I didn't answer. My eyes were focused on those big long, fleshy fingers. . .

Hahahahahahahahaha finish the gist joor.

*me smiling sheepishly in the office*

Hehehehe!!! Na dis one dem dey call 'okun meran'. I hope you know what that means

naijababe: Hehehehe!!! Na dis one dem dey call 'okun meran'. I hope you know what that means

No I don't

But this chairman no try sha
Because of his little 40 thousand naira, an old man wanted to bed a fresh juicy chick

His mates buy cars for girls naw