₦airaland Forum

Blackpowers101:
Are you still hearing those voices?

It stopped 'cos I met someone I thought is of value.

I'm numb again.

Crenzywilliams:
What are you waiting for, you had the time to sit down and type this, and even add that the voice sounds sweet, well, then. Go right off the roof, jump and go meet him, then he'll sing for u.
I think you're looking for cheap attention, there're ppl with real issues, If your schizophrenic and in 9ja, you can as well jump now.

Thank you.

Blackpowers101:
fast get palm fruit, the soft ones, get salt, put 4 of it in a dry pot, let it heat for a while, 15 minutes, bring down and chew them one after the other, for each one you put in your mouth just say am not ready. The voices will go forever

Thank you.

nedekid:
Better visit Yaba, let them inject you or give you anti depressant pills.

Okay, thanks.

IyaebeTheGreat:
How are you doing, hope you’ve gotten over the evil thoughts and have seek the needed help? May God come through for you

I'm not doing good my dear, I'm bout to write out my mind. I'll quote you in it.

Lol lol lol and lol

Very funny comments and definitely some relief, IyaebeThegreat, to your question maybe or maybe not, but definitely I'm still being hurt, I can't move on, I keep changing them girls like a baby changing diapers. I'm just numb and cold to many things I don't feel anything, and I don't know why.

He's been telling me to jump off my balcony on the third floor, and it's beginning to sound scaringly sweet damn.

Raymond0008:
That’s not a spiritual problem bruh, you are just broke. Assumes you are loaded definitely the babe won’t leave you and for not seeing another girl immediately definitely you are not loaded. You just need time and focus on your hustle then love LATER after getting it right on how to make money.

Not sure you read the whole thing. Being or wealthy isn't the point here.

I'm having girls, could change them weekly bases if I want, but I don't feel them, never met a one I TRULY love even it seemed so initially.

What I'm saying here is, I'm tired of changing girls, I've had quite a few since the last time I was in a very serious one, these days even older women are coming around but I'm not having that, that's what I'm saying.

Lastly I made this thread https://www.nairaland.com/5519396/cheated-deep-down-im-pains#83876714 2019, that's the genesis.

Nazgul:
You don't have any spiritual problem, you just lack self control.

Learn to control your díck and things would get better for you.

Did you read my post at all?

Also how do I forget about someone totally? This wrong remembrance of her keeps hurting me.

I wish I can induce a selective amnesia.

Hey guys, good evening, it's me again.

Sequel to my cheating episodes and the events that followed, she left me, she said she won't be able trust me again for life. Each day I tried to move on and forget about our memories, but it's so difficult. To make the matter worse, periodically, she do text me to ask about my work & family, particularly my mum & sis(they were close to an extent) but she would never have me back to her life.

The current issue I'm having right now is that I can't seems to love any girl, no matter how I tried or how good she was, this made a close friend of mine to insinuate that I'm having a spiritual problem. I've had a few relationships since we broke up 2019, and none of them lasted for 2 months. I always ends it up at the slightest opportunity.

Also I noticed this trend of older women around getting romantically attracted to me. Probably they've been noticing that I don't have a girl. I'm very tired & exhausted menn.

Does anyone think that probably I've been jinxed jazzed?

Sundrus:
why u dey fear?

Not about fear bro, it’s a mental thing.

Sundrus:
Go patronize ashawo for brothel. Since the solution na for u to dey get regular kpekus.

Not an option bro.

Offpoint1:
What do you seek exactly? To overcome your self servicing ambition/journey or to be free from your past?

The earlier bro.

It’s almost a year now I bedded my woman’s best friend, that singular act of mine crashed all I’ve built in three years, I came clean months after all the dusts have settled, but the damage has been done, no trust again, I’m loosing her.

Now the problem is that it’s proofing difficult loving someone else since we parted, my old ways are resurfacing, the one that worries me the most is masturbation. It has fully crawl into my life, and I needed practical solutions to defeat this.

Hookups/relationship isn’t an option as I am not emotionally and mentally ready for any, at the moment, I’m fixing up my broken relationship.

Help a brother please.

If I had a frail heart, I'd definitely contemplate suicide from the emotional assaults I received here as a result of my misdemeanour, I was not man enough, but my prayer is that the Almighty God will see us all through, and keep us from falling into temptations.

Thank you all.

trappatoni:
'[b]she cornered you'[/b]weyrey gidi ni man yi sha, boy take responsibility for your actions because you will still do it again. I wonder how the few good ones end up with boys like you.That one wey corner you go still blackmail you more because she has successfully found your weakness already. OP grow up and appreciate a good woman.

I'm no mad/bad person. This is just an unfortunate incident. This won't repeat itself again.

And I fully accept the blame for all that happened.

Viking07:
Dude is just discovering himself. Should the opportunity presents itself again, he'll cheat over and over again.

No sir. This won't ever repeat itself. Thanks.

Kick me, stab me, slam me, crucify me, I deserved all of them, and more. But remembers, I'm a human, an imperfect, my human side prevails me.

In response to few comments here;

1. I didn't take advantage of her, neither did she took advantage of me, because I'm a grwon up man. It was a mutual thing as a knife wasn't held on my neck to do that. Though she brought up a strange game which I reluctantly agreed to play(no 1 error) and that's the genesis of the whole thing. The act happening more than once is graphical, I wouldn't want to explain that on a public forum. Believe me, it wasn't my fault.

2. My fiancee isn't a dumb or a stupid girl, she was only been considerate as the cost of hotel accommodations for some 4 days around here would be too much for a job seeker, she was only trying to help out, I live alone in a room flat apartment, it's not as if we would be sleeping on a bed together. Even if it was like that, my girl trusted me to a fault. All the years we've been together, she's got no single reason to doubt me on anything. Though I fell, I never taught that this would happened.

3. Our relationship isn't a leech/parasitic one, we are doing fine on our own, she did helped me stop some things at the other end of life, like she showed me what life is truly is. I can't just afford to loose a woman like her in today's world.

Though many woman are secretive in nature, but trust, she is not many woman, she has never hide any part of her life to me. I do check up on her whenever I'm free, and there's no a single time I've got a reason to worry. Like I wrote before, she is a pure soul, the type you don't just meet everyday. I've seen many ladies before her, even in my undergrad years, so I fighting to keep her means a lot to me.

4. If I'm arrogant, I'm sorry, I didn't intend to be. And in all honesty, I'm not an arrogant being. That was just a mere description of my self, which I thought that it wasn't bad.

Thanks to everyone for your wonderful advice, and for righting my wrongs. I've decided not to tell her till we tied the knot. The friend has alreadu messaged me saying she's sorry for all that happened, that it shouldn't be her.

She already blamed herself in her series of messages, I'll keep that as a defense for future. Again, I'm so sorry, and thank you all.

Thanks to all for trying to help.

I'm just more confused now than ever. I'll keep this to myself till we meet in December, by then, I pray that God will forgive me, and help me keep this that have nurtured for a long time.

I've learnt my lessons now. Again, thank you all.

Abuse and curse me all you wished, the did is already done, the one I am not proud of, and never wished for to happen. I took all the blame, and only wanted a best idea/advice to safe landing.

My mind is pushing me towards visiting her to relate with her all that has happened. And again, another mind is telling me that all would be lost afterwards. I don't want to loose her, she's already an integral part of my life.

How best can I confront her without loosing her?

funmisticqueen:
She didn't seduce you,, you allowed yourself to be seduced. You couldn't stay faithful for her? Guess she isn't as close to your heart as you thought. And it was more than once. Guess you didn't really know yourself

I love her with all my heart, God knows . I was cornered with a game that I didn't really know it's rules, that's the genesis, the act happening more than once, well God knows. My human side prevails me. Women are tricky ma. I fell so hard.

Ahmed0336:
Hehehe tell her and loose her.

Keep her but make sure you stylishly make her quit her friendship with her end time friend

Hope her friend do not have evidence of what happened? As to the size and nature of your dick better find story tell her o. E.g I was sleeping with just boxers and your friend just walked in e.g before she ll use the size of your dick to blackmail you

Don't chat with her on social media even if you must keep it cordial.

I am in no way supporting your act but somethings are better left unsaid

For days I've been so weak bro, I'm so out of thoughts. I really bleeped up, I know.

I actually kept my distance from her, the first day, she slept in the bedroom, while I in the living room. I fell to some cheap plays, and she cornered me. I'm seriously regretting my actions.

This is a girl that have been praying with me(and for me) before I sleep or go to work the next day. I shouldn't have do this to her. It seems that I can't live with the guilt, neither do I wanna loose her.

Her friend is already ignored, both off and on-line.

donbachi:
Sounded very arrogant.

How please? But then sorry if I was.