₦airaland Forum

APOPTOSIS:
.... and you brought it to this platform for what exactly, knowing what this platform can do to you in minutes 🤔🤔

I was only scared cos the doctor said he sent it to the lab to know what it was, so it really got me scared that's why I brought it here. I was restless make Dem no come talk another thing.

GlorifiedTunde:
Those are her thyroid glands. She just went through Thyroidectomy, a surgical procedure to remove all or part of the thyroid gland.

And it wasn't sent to the lab to discover what it is. It was sent to the lab to detect if it's benign or malignant.

waoooooo, really enlightened...

Rexymania:
No need to ask what it is, just thank God it was successful

you're right... I really appreciate

MightySparrow:
Surgery is a thing I don't like, especially when handled in Nigeria.

very true bro....

MightySparrow:
Whatever it is, thank God she survived the surgery.

Thank you so much sir... The Lord bless you. It was really a tough surgery that the doctor had to call another specialist from another hospital to come and help him. Infact after the surgery she was taken to the ICU straight to a point that her breathe ceased completely. Thank God she survived.

Last year my mum's neck kept swelling from time to time, so we went for check-up in the hospital and the doctor said it's goiter, then she was scheduled for an interview. Glory be to God the surgery was successful today and it was removed but then the doctor said that it is not goiter and he sent the thing to the lab to be tested inorder to ascertain what it is... Please medical personnels, what is this?

I wonder how nff arrived at the decision to sign finidi George... The last coach did very well.. How can you sack a coach that reached a final of afcon just to appoint finidi.

I was browsing through Facebook then I came across a post that generated a very strong argument mixed with laughter, anger and comic..... The question says: how many times should a couple have sex in a week? Someone said at least 5times in a week and a lady who go angry with that comment said did her husband marry her for sex or has sex become food? Lolsss

So nairalanders let's discuss.... As for me, when i was still married, i only have sex with my wife once a week, sometimes once in two weeks and sometimes no sex at all for almost 3weeks or 1month.

[quote author=Kinghenry1315 post=130060792][/quote]so you think God will not give me other children who will take care of me in my old age or carry me to my grave?

skj1377:
I wonder how life was designed. It's good guys that always suffer in hands of these terrible women. I can imagine what your going through.
Don't love her pls. Cancel any love for her.

you're right sir, i really appreciate, though it's not easy but I'm gradually doing that already and I thank God I'm gradually moving on.

Kinghenry1315:
You should have come here to seek advice before sending her packing ,Yoruba adage says if ear doesn't hear bad news the stomach will not get spoiled think of all the rich men and all the mothers that knows the children they had for their man are not theirs yet they all lived happily you just brought forever sadness to your life what is important in this life is a child love I pity you .

so i should keep a woman who is capable of killing me? A woman who know all the while thay I'm not the father of her child and yet kept quite for almost a decade? I should I keep quite knowing fully well that the real father of the child has started talking about his child?

I pray this happen to you someday so that you can forgive.

Nexttpage:
I can only imagine what you going through.
Please how much does it cost, I mean the DNA!

it cost me 170k... You can't imagine what I'm going through bro, this is the worst thing that can happen to a man.

2Radii:
Sorry about that but trust me, don't let emotions rule you, u would have more depression if u allow her back into ur life...talking from experience

hmmm, I'm already healing gradually bro, taking her back is what i'll never do in my life. God forbid!!!

Adonko:
you are the one that should be pitted ...what a shame ...so he should have bought it here first so that you will give this advice . So he should just ignore all his findings and Iive with a deceiver and a fraud happily ever after.

It's your lots that brings shame to men....if that's the case All of us should not bother looking for a decent wife rather will should just go to a brothel and get any ashawo for a wife and even if she gives us loads of other people's children we should just live happily ever after .

Op in all you do don't listen to this person or his likes ..

thank you very much sir, i can't appreciate you less. I'm already getting over it gradually and move on with my life. But to take her back? Never in my life!!!

Zaheertyler:
Your spirit no gree from day one
But you continue prolonging the karma
The pain could have been less if you had done what your spirit was telling you since 2015
I never feel this kin pain before so I no fit advice you well
The good thing is
Time heals and your single now
Please leave Nigerian women for now if you are soft hearted

I was not having money to do the DNA right from time that was the major constraint.

skj1377:
Check DNA of second child. If the child is yours take back immediately. My child is exactly 9yrs old and I almost married a lady that would have put me in the same mess. God help you.

I'm planning to do that soonest bro

Mentholated:
Life is not black and white.

Get all the information regarding this situation to enable you to make a better decision.

Before confronting a spouse with any serious issue like this, get your ducks on a roll.

1. Is the second kid yours?

2. Who is the father of the first kid?, Is he alive or dead? Are they still in contact? Is he even aware of the kid?

3. Who else knows?

4. How is my relationship with my wife?

5. Is she a good mother to my kids?

6. Is she fully committed to this marriage?

Life is deep and decisions should be taken to serve your best interest and not what society expects from you.

the father of the first child is alive and aware... I found out that they've been contact secretly.

Nonexisting1:
No, do the DNA test now to help you know if and if not you should be involved in his life. If he is your son, you must not fight for custody immediately, just remain involved in his life for now until he is of age. If not, he will despise you after they must have downloaded lies in his brain. If he is not your son, then to hell with everybody and continue your normal life.

very right sir, I really appreciate... God bless you alot!!! I'll start working on that soonest. Just that for now i need to heal.

Nonexisting1:
Try to have DNA test done on your second child. If he is your child, bring him back immediately to avoid throwing your own blood out of your home. It leaves bad memory on a child's head. As for your wife and the first child, you took the best decision.

the truth is even if i conduct a DNA test on the second child and confirm he's my son, i bet you her family that i know will never give me the child, i know how much they'll fight me for the child especially for the fact that he's still a minor and have not attained the legal age of being under a father's care. I just have to be patient till he attains that legal age of being under my care. No court will give him to me at this age.

bliizz:
I understand how it feels but you really need to pick up your broken pieces and move on.

You are even lucky say you never grow old...you can still produce more kids

This time around,as you dey prepare for antenatal care...dey arrange money for DNA test.

The other gender ain't loyal at all

hmmm, you're right sir... I've been betrayed. Everything happens for a reason.

Brandiebird:
If that’s the case then you’re glutton for punishment. You love someone who chose you because you were an option to cover her shame.

You will do whatever you want but be sure of your decision because you will forever be resentful of your wife and that innocent child.

You will believe that she owes you some unattainable level of respect and honour and whenever she falls short you will remember her betrayal. It’s a dangerous path to embark on.

There’s more to life than love. It’s a huge responsibility. That child needs to know where they came from and one day they’ll look for their father. Your wife may even contact him behind your back if you stand in the way.

There’s a lot to consider. Love doesn’t always conquer all. Take some time to think about your decisions and don’t base those decisions on feelings.

you're right sir, the basic truth is that i can never accept her back... my major concern right now is how to move on from the pains of betrayal and depression it caused me.... Just yesterday night i just found myself crying uncontrollably.

HopeNeverDies:
Omohhhhhhh... Damnnn💔

Some women can be so desperately wicked shaa...


Please, on no account, shaa try eat and look fresh. Don't take back that hoe pls and pls... Even if she calls Tinubu to beg u, no ans am... Pls

Omohhhh! Nurturing someone else's kid of 9yrs! 9 good years ..

Meaning, if u didn't do the DNA secretly, you wouldn't have known still and she'll be inside that house laughing and smiling with and at u... Damnnn!!!

honestly brother, I've tried so much to eat but no appetite. The worst thing is I'm at home 24hrs because I work from home.

Brandiebird:
Take comfort in the fact that you found out 9 years later rather than 29 years later. Also, the pain is fresh because the betrayal is fresh so give yourself time. Give yourself a year or so to heal and then do a test on your second child. If that child is yours then do right by that child and move on with your life.

What she did is more than paternity fraud, she has demonstrated that she will always put her interests before yours and anyone else’s. That is a dangerous person and you are very lucky to find out now before she sends you to an early grave.

She lied for that long and she would have gone to her grave with that lie. She put herself before you and that child. I hope you never take her back because you were a means to an end for her.

Though I'm thanking God for finding out, I'm also in pains because of how much i love her.... I just wish i can move on.

I'm sorry for opening a new account to post this and also start afresh on nairaland.

I'm married with two kids aged 9yrs & 6yrs respectively. I was dating my wife while we were planning to marry, then she got pregnant and claimed it's for me, so due to the pressure from her family i had to taker her in ASAP before the pregnancy becomes conspicuous which is what the family was avoiding.

She have birth to the child in 2015 and since then i've been having doubt about being the father of the child, but there was no means of conducting a DNA test due to financial constraints, so i forgot about the DNA test totally and continued taking care of my wife and the child because of the love i have for both of them. Honestly guys i passed through alot in order to cater for them and make them happy... I've seen real stress.

Early this year the mental torture about the Paternity of the child started hitting me real hard again because the child does not look anywhere close to me or my wife, then i started working and saving towards a DNA test.

Finally on the 2nd May, 2024 i conducted a DNA test secretly. After two weeks i was browsing through my phone then a mail entered from the DNA centre. My hands started shaking, my body became so cold due to fear.

After 30mins or thereabout i summoned the courage to open the mail, that was when i got the greatest shock of my life, the probability of Paternity is 0.03%. Immediately i went blank and couldn't even talk as my blood pressure became so high, i was only shedding tears.

After two days, i asked my wife who the father of the child is and immediately she heard my question, she knelt down crying and begging me to forgive her, she said the child belongs to her ex boyfriend, that they've been dating even before i met her.

She further confessed that when she got pregnant, she told him but he denied being responsible and because i was equally dating her and we were also having sex, she decided to pin it on me. I've been taking care of a child who isn't mine for the past 9 years?

I asked her to leave my house together with the two children and i told her that even the second child is not mine because i don't know what to believe anymore. She has left my house already but I'm still passing through a great state of depression, i can't eat, I can't do anything again, just crying my life out.
I don't even pray for night to come because of how difficult it is for sleep to come. Please guys will i ever get over this or heal? It keeps getting fresher and fresher in my mind every moment...

This is the worst thing I've ever seen in my life... God!