₦airaland Forum

luckgood:
I'm just curious to know what you guys think,because I only see them as nothing but a ho!

Fit2Rule:
The topic of love, lust and infatuation is one that have attracted discussions from both young old over time. A lot of young people still don't know when they are being infatuated, lusting or in love. The result is heart breaks, societal instability through relationship and marital failures, and other accompanying social ills. While some people argue that one leads to another and then to the other, some see these three as entire different.
Janet Zimmerman once wrote:
Lust is a physical emotion and reaction to someone else's physical appearance. It's when you're sexually attracted to a guy and want him only for sex. Lust tends to be short-lived and is more about immediate
gratification. If it's just lust, you will have sex in the
heat of the moment and only feel physically fulfilled.
Infatuation is an intense feeling. It happens when
you are attracted to a guy's appearance or attracted
to him sexually. Infatuation happens early on and
tends to become obsessive. When you're infatuated,
you see him through rose-colored glasses based on
who you imagine him to be. You have put him on a
pedestal and don't acknowledge him for who he
really is — good or bad. You may behave irrationally,
become caught up in your feelings of what you think
love is and aren't living in reality.
Lust and infatuation are usually fleeting and short-
lived and don't tend to turn into love. When you are
in love, you will have intense feelings for a guy, and
be attracted and connected to him on the level of
mind, body and soul.
She went further to state the attributes of love as follow.
That love is
-a feeling
-an inside job
-a way of being
-a choice.
"We love with our hearts, but we first lust with our eyes"
As the popular saying goes: What the eyes doesn't behold, the heart doesn't grieve about. What's your opinion? Do you think these three are entirely different? or do you think one can lead to another? Most importantly, can someone fall in love without first lusting?

PunkyOh:
Beats me. This one didn't die though, he just broke a few bones because he made his leap of fate from a 2nd or 3rd storey. Can't remember. He was mighty embarrassed afterwards & kept on telling lame ass stories about why/how he fell.

Oh & he was a Nigerian

alberto2k:
I don't know about others but for me... I'll just turn it off, 3days and am over a break up... Might still miss the person tho but with time, i'll forget about her.


You wanna know how I do mine?

Permit me to say your where in lust not in love


















A bottle of vodka and a nice meal prepared with weed ... Thank me when you're sober

stnwani:
Dear Nairalanders, I've been wondering whether a man performing cunnilingus(MouthAction involving the stimulation of a woman's Virginia/clitoris with the tongue) on a woman is at a great risk of contracting HIV.

Please I'd love Ur candid opinion...

Eberex:
You dont need a crystal ball to know how it will end. Or do you want to know? Can your heart take it? Cos i can tell you now.

PunkyOh:
It's the one that had more genuine feelings. No such thing as this gender suffers more than the other gender blah blah blah. I've seen a guy jump out of a window because his woman left him. We simply deal with it differently. With some of the ladies crying their little hearts out etc. I don't know how men take it since they aren't as vocal about it as us ladies. I think the not talking is what turns some of them psycho. The trauma & no real outlet can do a number on a person's psyche, I reckon.

Eberex:
Yes school is a major reason oga. Why do i say so? The parents should be responsible for her tuition and wardrobe. You only come in in area of recharge cards and up-keeping. But the most important thing is communication, but in your own case communication only happens when she needs something. i guess she talks about it more when you guys talk.

I know females who are contented with what their guys sends to them. Hence i would term your girl as materialistic who doesn't love or give a shit about you.

Twaci:
Well, I have a lot of males in my family and I learn almost everything I know from them.

I watch them a lot, especially when they go through a mutual breakup from their ex. I noticed that when they go out there, infront of the girl or a friend, they act all unconcerned. But when they come home, they start singing stupid love songs (Toni Braxton's Unbreak my heart don tire for their hands) and acts mushy and all.

What say u then?

andromida:
The character is the person. So who or what do you love?

Eberex:
You started wrongly by saying yes to her request all in the name of love. Now she is used to that idea of asking and receiving. I would advice you stick to your policy of knowing when to give or not, mind you its not a guarantee that she will marry you. I can say confidently that you are not the only one in her life because it is clear that she is materialistic and would dump your sorry ass when someone who is more buoyant comes her way (if he hasn't already).

Meanwhile how can you be so serious with such a girl who resides in abuja? you try o!!!!

My advice is cut down your expenses on her. Does she school? Or what does she do actually? Is she from a rich home?

winnieberry:
I have been single for over a year now,and my friends both in my hostel,dept,home have been bugging me over why am I single,am I normal,am I a lesbian,do I have a spirit hubby preventing me frm being in a relationship.Its seriously annoying ,they have hooked up wit guys number of times but have turned them down with flimsy excuses like not tall enough or too smallish.Am a pretty tall lady though am not interested in height or physical appearances ,those are what I used turning down toasters so they stop bugging me,this made my friends to think am being selectively main reason for me is I haven't met a guy I feel a connection or a spark with, most times I try but I end losing interest in them. My older friends I confided in think I should start a relationship first and love or feelings will come later But what I end up dating a guy and the love or feelings doesn't come,do I end dumping him or continue in a loveless relationship?my friends don't understand my reasons so I just keep it to myself.But for now am content with being single for now.My friends are the ones making it a big deal out of it like being single is a crime.Abeg nairalanders is it a big deal or abnormal to be a single?

Twaci:
I have heard a couple of guys and girls say that they can do without their partner in an event of a breakup. Some have even gone to the point of getting a re-bound girl or guy just forget an ex.

But let's be sincere to ourselves, who do you think (even under the facade of being emotionally undisturbed and strong) suffers from a breakup the most?

Nokialumia720:
The girl i,m dating is a holy holy church girl and she is too religious. When we started dating she told me that she will not have sex with me which i accepted because i trully love her and sex is never my priority. But the problem now is that she always felt guilty whenever will romance and kiss and do some other things apart from sex. The worst of it is that she called me and told me that she is no more interested in the relationship which got me heartbroken bcs I sincerely love her. Pls friends what do i do?

MayflowerB:
Pls let her go......dont be d devil in her life