₦airaland Forum

Ekaitte went to the store to buy a parrottrained in the USA and asksthe sales person;"What's so special about this parrot ?"Sales person says:"This parrot is a genius and can answer anyquestion"Ekaitte asks the parrot;"How do I look?"The parrot replies;"You look like a fuckin slut?"Ekaitte gets pissed off and tells the salesperson that its a very rudeparrot and she cannot buy it despite itwas trained in the USA.The sales person tells Ekaitte to wait for 2mins...The sales person takes the parrot to the backof the store andshoves the parrot into a bucket of waterand when he pulls theparrot out he says;"if you disrespect the lady out there againi'll soak you back in water" and takes theparrot back to the store.Th sales person apologized to Ekaitte andsays she can ask theparrot another question.Ekaitte: "If I come home with one manwhat would you think?" Parrot: "He's yourhusband"Ekaitte: "Two men?"Parrot: "Your husband and his brother"Ekaitte: "Three men?"Parrot: "Your husband, his brother andyour brother" Ekaitte: "Four men?"At this time the Parrot turns to the Salesperson and says:"Bring back the bleeping bucket of waterI already told you she's aslut!!!"

SOME LECTURERS FROM A UNIVERSITY IN NIGERIA, FACULTY OF ENGINEERING BOARDED A PLANE.WHEN THE PLANE WAS READY TO TAKE-OFF, THE PILOT SAID......"WELCOME ON BOARD LADIES &GENTLEMEN MAY I PLEASE INFORM YOUTHAT THIS PLANE WAS MANUFACTURED BY YOUR STUDENTS IN THE UNIVERSITY AND THIS IS THE FIRST TIME OF FLYING".IMMEDIATELY THEY HEARD THAT, EVERYONE RAN OUT OF THE PLANE EXCEPT ONE PROFESSOR IBRAHIM YUSUF WHO SAT COMFORTABLY.PEOPLE WERE SURPRISED AND WENT TOHIS SEAT TO ASK HIM WHY HE DID NOT RUN OUTOF THE PLANE LIKE OTHERS?HE SMILED AND REPLIED..."THERE IS NO NEED TO RUN OUT BECAUSE IF IT IS TRUE THAT THIS PLANE WAS MADE BY OUR STUDENTS, THEN WITH WHAT WE TAUGHT THEM, AM VERY SURE THE PLANE WILL NOT EVEN MOVE".Pls don't laugh all alone. Just to put a smile on someone's face���

Girls with small breast are scared of hanging their bra outside cos it looks likenose mask ��I come in vawulence

Short girls cheat a lot because they thinktheir boyfriends will not see them

Girls with small breast are scared of hanging their bra outside cos it looks likenose mask ��I come in vawulence

Short girls cheat a lot because they thinktheir boyfriends will not see them�

1)If you introduced me to your parents and later dump me, I will continue coming to your house, I can’t leave your parents because of you*����������2)Oh God, the smell you gave to Goats, some of your sons have Stolen it*����������3)some of us, our girlfriends will neverpost our pictures even if we get missing.*����������4)I was in a taxi and there was this weirdlooking muscular guy at the back seat with 2 other guys. His phone rings and he answered, ‘boss, I’m in a taxi with him now, I will shoot him when he gets off’*We’ve been in the taxi for 2 days now and no one wants to get off����������5)We UGLY Guys Don’t Usually Change Our Profile Pictures *Because We Know How We Suffered To Look Handsome in The Previous Photo!!���������6)Are you going to ask me to be your val or should I call your name three times and break the egg like baba told me to?*����������7) If her armpits are hairly let her sleep outside since she want to be a wild Animal����������Some girls will Zoom your picture justto see if you have money in your pocketsbefore replying your message….If I mention tribe nowThey'll say I hate Igbo people����������9) Girls, best way to punish your boyfriend is to reject his “Money”.I swear it is very Painful.Boys am i communicating??����������10) I don’t give my number to strangers but you can give your account number to strangers, thief.����������11) Nothing hurts more than buying a new Exercise book and getting zero on the first page����������12) So The Situation Where Fine And Rich Girls Fall In Love With Ugly Broke Boys Nu, Does It Only Happens In Movies?Because I Meet All The Requirclick ement. I’m Broke And Very Ugly But Still Naa!!Why !!!����������

1 is the number that begin the numbers that is use to count

seven is my lucky number

••••••Conversation between a Rat and Man•••••Rat: (with tiny voice) hello.Man: hello, who am I speaking with?Rat: Na Mr. John be this abi??Man: Yes you are speaking with Mr. John,who is this please?Rat: So you no recognize my voice abi? Name your room mate.Man: You say what?Rat: Your room mate Rat. I dey your roomnow...Man: I beg your pardon?Rat: which yeye beg you dey beg me. Inever eat since yesterday,were you wakacomot? I check that place wey you dey putfood I no see anything. I check the kitchen,nothing. I even check your fridge,no singlefood there. E be like say you wan kill meabi... No problem, I just say make I let youknow say That your certificate inside yourwardrobe wey dem write LAGOS STATEUNIVERSITY I don eat the LA comot.Remaining GOSSTATE UNIVERSITY. Let mesee which work you go take GOSstateuniversity find.....Nonsense (rat ends call)

1.wife:I have a dream about you giving me a diamond
husband:go back to dream and wear it

2.soon in Nigeria you would be hearing pay your tax money for your well

3.last week I was going to America to meet my friend as I hear the flight money I commot board a bike to America.I don't have time for rubbish

4.For the next year candidate for presidensy my chicken Chuckieschicken has decided to contest for CHICKEN DEMOCRATIC PARTY CDP Let us celebrate kuku give him money to contest

5.COVID 19 NEWS:it has been confirmed that 50,000 rats,19,550 chickens and 152.023 ants have been tested positive for covid 19
me on my way to isolation centre

Hello folks

FUNNY JOKE OF THE DAY
1.if Nigeria ever want to be a like China permit me to choose one of my best chicken to run for Government

2.wonder shall never end o! I saw a girl on facebook posting:today is my birthday so you should come and celebrate with me
so I come and she dey be like:ekaro evibodi shey well for you
I comot japa

3.AMERICA
B:hey babe
G:whats up
CHINA
B:how are you
G:fine
NIGERIA
B:hi babe
G:wetin!


4.
It is found out that ant can transfer corona virus so are we sick or dead

5.I lost my #10 yesterday at Sokoto and I'm in Lagos and I went back to pick it shey be I do well

A teacher is asking his student question in home economics

_teacher:what do we use to cut food in the kitchen?
_student:knive
_teacher:now Chicken what do we use to turn off fire?
_chicken:carbonate drinks
_teacher:what!
_chicken: our elementary science teacher told us that carbon(ii)oxide is use to turn off fire and it is use in the preparation of drinks
_teacher*chaiii*

Na Nigeria new sim card

Thanks here is the card: 8654633252546645234656664562323256456464636432326548547464

I know every one will be lazy to read this numbers

1.has anyone wonder by the way Nigeria goat look at people as if it had met one in an important occation

2.in a class
teacher:what is photosynthesis
student:photosynthesis is the ability of a phone to capture a picture synthesis by sunlight produce from the sun to make it more beautiful.
/chaii/

3.a guy dump me last year by collecting #50,000 from me and telling me I would recieve $500million and has not been picking my call,pls what went wrong

4.I saw a flock of chicken having an accident on the road and I'm hoping an ambulance would come and pick them

5.pls,I lost my atm card last week.
the name is "chicken",password is "micky5mouse" account number is "0NIGERIA4DEBT"

1.why do girls like nylon during rain as their best padi(friend)

2.my girlfriend ditch me yesterday and I was appointed as a NEPA today so I went to her house and tell her I dey pity your street.

3.why do witch suddenly appear and start laughing,has they won lottery

4.a professor made a calculation about my result and say I going to fail and I prove his calculation was all wrong by asking him to solve this equation:
x*0=2

5.if you ever had a chance to save one thing,would you choose to save your iphone 11 pro max with your atm of all your money over your life? Smart guys only.

;DManchester united virsus Machester city,predict your scores

Numerouno94:
I jux they imagine who Lamasta go support wen Ronaldo scores against City. Chai!! I go luv that day

We will make them drink there sweat

Leed utd have sign James for £25million from Manchester utd and he is going to be wearing jersey no.20