₦airaland Forum

Damibiz:
Chipapii,Damibiz most confess ur wounderful work took me to last year..nd it was great..nice work u gat here...Damibiz will follow to the end

Lol. Thanks bro.

nollyway:
Shape: shaping tins

> I see u bro

hoMegas:
Fantastic as usual. Keep da flag flying and bleep shape real fast

thanks bro.

yellow237:
omo dis guy na master tactician, ur style na A1

orijintv:
Man !!! Im so so proud of you .. You write so well .. God bless your hustle

Thanks bro.

Short story

Click HERE for all episodes of Diary of a Broke Playboy

I handed my list over to my father. He was of the opinion that it was the excess money that he was giving me that made me keep my girlfriend in my lodge and be getting her pregnant anyhow. So he decided I was going to break every expenses down on paper, that way I won't have change to feed any girl. "Excess money", Imagine.

"What do you need 6 packs of toilet rolls for? Do you run a public toilet?" he asked me, observing me over the rims of his eyeglasses.
"And see this one, 2 towels? What for?"
"Dad, it's for the remaining 3 years I have in school."
"So you want to use 2 towels over a period of 3 years, so that you will come and be spreading disease everywhere?"
Hian, daddy sef.
"One carton of Indomie," he read out. "Where do you even get the strength to be impregnating girls when all you eat is indomie?"
Willie who was busy with his laptop and had headphones over his head giggled, That MOTHERFUCKER!
"Papa Willie!" my mom yelled and eyed him. He hissed and continued.
"And look at this one, he can't even spell knickers," he said and shot me his eyes again.
"Which one?" I asked, going closer to take a peep at the list.
"Ar ar, Daddy is sneakers nah not knickers."
"What is sneakers?"
"A types of shoe."
He shook his head and continued, if only he would just give me the money and Bleep the list. It reminded me of my elder sister's days in the dormitory. She would bring him her list and he will be like.
"Why 5 sanirary pads? Are you marketing them in school?" and when she decides to save herself the interview and remove sanitary pads from the list, he would be like.
"Why no pads? Come Oluchukwu Rita, are you pregnant?"
And my mom will always be there to intervene but my popsy no send anybody.

"And you should include condoms in this list because I am now afraid of you, Chinecherem, your fear is catching me."
And after everything, he broke the whole expenses into 2. My father never liked maths and he hardly stressed us each time we flunked in any maths exam. My mom will be scolding and he would just be like.
"Leave this Children, how many times have you applied X and Y in that your small office? If he knows how many 500 nairas can give him 1 million, he is ok, that is the basic thing." My mother will only shake her head.

So when it came to money, Chike Obi has nothing on my Popsy.
He divided my 21,525 naira into 2 and divided one part into 2 again. He added a half of the whole money to one part of the the other divided half and gave me 16,145. He probably knew I wasn't going to buy one quarter of those things on that list. So I was still rich anyway.
"Ehe willie, when are you going back or have they expelled you?" he asked my brother.
"Daddy nooo, I'm going back next week."
"It's your last semester in that school, so you won't buy anything naa."
"No sir, I'm not buying anything, it's just that I need small money to fix some things."
"I know, you are always needing money, how much?"
"Just 50k," he said with a wide grin.
"Are you mad? Did you put JUST before that 50k?"
My father actually removed his lenses to ask him if he was mad. It was my turn to giggle at him.
"Daddy no, I mean It's only 50k that I need. Nothing else."
"What are you even doing with that type of money? Are you sorting your VC?"
"Daddy noo, We are, I mean my department people, we are hosting a graduation part and I need a pair of tuxedos to shine dad. You know it's once in a life time." he was grinning ear to ear again.
"Party kwa? Are you graduating from Quilox that you will each contribute 50k for it?"
"What is Quilox?" My mother asked.
"A Church in Onitsha," My father replied so casually, I would have believed him if I didn't know what Quilox is. My mother only nodded and continued pressing her phone.
"Daddy, the money is for tuxedo, party and other things."
"I don't even understand the language you are speaking, maybe when the sun reduces, I will understand," my father said and ran into his room before Willie will remember any other dues.

I cat walked into Naza's room and met her kneeling on her bed, saying the divine mercy prayer. A miracle. I was going to slowly sneak out of the room before she caught me. She didn't talk. She just pointed at the floor beside her. I can't argue, I just jejely joined her. Luckily enough, she was rounding up. Her mother peeped into the room and saw us. I was able to notice the smile on her face. Yepaa, I have scored a positive point on her score card.

"So by what time are we leaving?" she asked after the prayer.
"Ermm, 3pm."
"I hope your lodge mates would be back by then, that your logde that looks like graveyard."
"See, I want to buy some things," I said, standing up.
"Come first before you go."
She held my hand and I was expecting her to order for fried rice or any other impossible food. She eyed me with a wicked smile on her face
"Don't worry, I just want you to rub your baby's head."
I smiled and stroke her belly. The bulge was still small. I kissed her forehead and turned to go.
"Peel those oranges for me before you go."

My father dropped us at the park and made sure we both took different buses back to school. One going to Anambra State University and the other going to unizik. He needed no further stories. He even bought our tickets with his money. My brother was just spicing my anger with laughter. I swear he would have followed my bus to my school if he didn't have an appointment.

As I dragged my bag into my my lodge, James wasn't back yet but shape and her sister was. Even Chinaza was already chatting away with Shape in my room. That girl is a magician.


http://gistrealm..com.ng/2017/04/diary-of-broke-playboy-44.html?m=1#more

hoMegas:
I used to read as a guest but the story was so good I had to join nairaland to tell you how good a job you've been doing. BTW you must bleep that shape girl o. Keep the flag flying. P.s a loyal reader

Wow. Thanks bro.

That shape matter still dey.

I busted into their house. That was actually my first time of visiting their home after I had Chinaza where she is now. I threw my greetings around like I was doing broadcast planting.
"Where is Naza?" I asked, surprised that everyone was so calm.
They all pointed up to her room.
"In her room?" I asked and they all shouted me upstairs. I was disturbing their movie.

I busted into her room and met her wiping blood from her hand. I rushed her and held her hand.
"What happened?"
She slowly opened her hand to reveal a small knife cut in her palm.
"I cut my hand while peeling oranges."
She was giving me a look that was expecting sympathy. I wished I knew how to hiss.
"This is why you called me out this night. Small injury like this?"
"No, come and finish peeling these oranges, I swear I will leak them."
She was begging and she was beautiful. I kept wondering why a girl like her would stick around with a guy like me. Love took over and I was peeling oranges in no time. Then Davido's "If" came up and I joined in. We were actually doing a duet.

"If I tell you say I love you o!!" I sang and she responded.
"My money, my bother na your own o baby!!" she sang in her sweet voice. I eyed her and nearly cut myself open.

"Naza respect yourself, which your body na my own?"
"What do you mean, is it not yours again?" she asked.
"The body that you have refused to allow me touch since this baby came up."
Then my favorite part came up.
"No do no do, no do gra gra for me o."
Fast forward to the "I go shook you shooku shooku part", I sang it with all my heart and she switched off the music.

"See neche," she said and held my arm. "every time is not for shooku shooku. At least relax and appreciate what you have. If you keep wanting to shook me, then I will have to start suspecting that you don't actually love me, that you are only after my body."
I dropped the orange and held her.
"That is not true naa, I love other part of you as well and you know it."
"Then stop wanting to shook all the time. At least, you should be grateful that my family didn't throw me out because of this pregnancy and we should take things easy small. See me here, I am not going anywhere, I love you and will always be around even though you keep messing up. I won't go. I have taken enough shit from you to walk away."
I was touched and for the first time in my life, I felt real guilty for cheating on her. I brought her closer and placed my lips on her forehead while I rubbed her belly, feeling the little bulge in there.

"Do you think it's a girl?"
She smiled and looked at me.
"I want it to be a boy, I want to know what you looked like when you were born."

I kissed her mouth and she held my lips with her teeth. I was able to Ignore her ass and boobs all those while. A miracle.
"Thank you for sticking with an arsehole like me, even though I have nothing to offer except my dick."
She laughed and punched me playfully.
"You are not going home this night, You will stay here," she was commanding, my opinion didn't matter.
"And your people?" I asked.
"They are tired of fighting with me, they won't bother us."

I made my call to Willie and told him I was sleeping over at Naza's. He was only too glad. He was going to eat my own share of the spaghetti my sister cooked.

I carried my baby and my baby in her to bed and dropped her gently. I locked the door and joined her. She placed her head on my chest.
For the first time, I appreciated what it felt like to sleep beside a girl I really loved and nothing happened. No shooking or any other thing.

I promise a lot of you would really enjoy this if you gave it a try but eventually not me. I love shooku shooku pass Davido.


http://gistrealm..com.ng/2017/04/diary-of-broke-playboy-43.html?m=1#more

mikuz:
This is good read. Great job here.

Thanks bro

nollyway:
Guy infact u na everything

Lol. Thanks brother

Shawnpp:
You just always make me wanna Bleep anytime I read your story....

Silensa:
Chipappii Chipappii Chipappii

how many times I call you. stop making me laugh like a fool.


guy you really on point. this your experience with Naza had led me to have a rethink about giving my babe belle

Lol. Sorry bro. Give am belle abeg. Naza own dy special, e dy her body.

nastynic:
LMFAO!


BIG UPS CHIPAPPIi, NICE UPDATE BRUH....

Thanks bro.

So I noticed that a girl can grow from an Emmanuella to Regina Daniels within a space of 5 years if not shorter and while you are waiting for her to mature, some guys will be chopping her like that. Just like that popular saying, Girls are are like Mango, while you are waiting for them to ripen, some will be eating them with salt.

Like this particular girl in my area. She was like a bamboo like 5 years ago when I first knew her. Fast forward to now, her assets seemed to be way out of this world and like I always say, if she is 15 and her body looks 20 then fucking treat her like she is 20. And I did my age compatibility calculation. My age divided by 2 plus 7. I.e 21 ÷ 2 = 10.5 + 7 = 17.5. Well she should be around 16 so it was close. We could actually start something.

So on a very good day, just after I have gotten my daily dose of TOMENTATION from my pregnant girlfriend, I decided to catch some fresh air, maybe it will help my frustration evaporate. I was just outside our gate when she walked by, dragging her 2 tons of backside along and seemed to be running after her firm boobs. Immediately I saw her, I knew I needed to talk to her.

"Hey you come here!" I called, I was her senior naa so I needed to add some sort of command to my tone. She came and dropped a good evening on me. I nodded with my attention fixed on the upper part of her body, just below her neck. Think whatever you like. Lol.

"What's that your name again?" I asked.
"Chidimma," she replied. She was Ebony and like girls her age had low cut hair. Open teeth. Cute face and beautiful eyes. She could have competed very well with Naza if she was fair.
"Are you in a hurry?"
"Yes, my mom is waiting for me."
I looked around our environment and did a few seconds thinking.
"Let me walk you down, I want to discuss some things with you."
She didn't complain and since her house was just a few meters away, we strolled. I had this aura that would make any girl her age like me easily. At least, she will be bragging that a boy like me talked to her.

I got a little more details about her. In her ss2 and the same class with my our Amara. I'm sure Amara wouldn't mind.
"So you don't have a phone yet?" she nodded and I shook my head.
"Quite a pity. How do we now communicate?"
It was a rhetorical question and she knew that.
"Well, can you always come to my house?"
She nodded. She didn't even ask why I want her to be coming to my house. Girls these days, even the small ones can decode things that are bigger than them.
"See what will happen, can you come out to that field by 6pm today?" I asked, pointing to a nearby field that belonged to a primary school around the corner.
"I'm not sure, but I will try."
Well we got closer to their gate. Our 6pm date fixed. One last look at her boobs and booty and I was done for the minute. Just when I turned on my way home. My father's car screeched to a halt beside me. My heart jumped to my mouth as I stood there.

The passenger side window went down and I saw Willie's teeth shinning at me. I hopped in with relief.
"Where you go naa?" I asked as we moved on.
"I just go give one girl like that heart attack. She just dy form for me because I no dy use ride enter school."
"So how e go?"
"As she just see me inside this ride, she commot bra for me."
He was shinning his teeth as he spoke.
"Shaa, I hope you won't be banging girls inside popsy car. He will smell ur sperm o or you fit forget condom or pant inside."

6pm and I was patrolling the field like a pregnant woman in a maternity ward. 6:15pm and I was already vexing, blaming Chinaza. If she had dropped something for me. I wouldn't be here running after a 16 year old girl. I was going to walk home angrily when I spotted her walking towards me. Her short skirt blowing in the wind, revealing her tempting laps. All my anger evaporated.

"Sorry, I was helping my mother with the food," she said as she got to me.
"Ok, so let's sit."
I held her hand and we walked to nearby seat, made of concrete attached to a classroom block. We sat there and I began my preaching.

".. long and short of it all is that the moment I saw you walking past me, I knew I liked you immediately and would love us to get closer. I don't know if anyone has ever told you but you are very beautiful." I confessed, eyeing her boobs like the discussion was between me and it.
She smiled a thank you and flashed her dimples.
"So can we be friends?" I asked.
"Yes, We are friends already."
"Well that's not the type that I want."
"What type do you want?"
"The type that with everything inclusive. Your heart your body, everything."
My emphasis was more on her body. She smiled and murmured an "I don't know." I only needed to prod further and before we knew wassup, she was already tripping. One thing to another and we were already closer. The next thing and we were on each other. It started with a kiss before my hand started its investigative journalism. I just couldn't wait. The lord blessed us with darkness. The sky was getting darker as the time ticked on.

I was tunning on and off her firm boobs and searching underneath her short skirt while she was grabbing at my Penis. I held her against our concrete seat and made her legs go 45 degrees apart, her pants were already in her purse by then and my penis was already condomed off. I needed no second baby.
I found out it was a bit easy to penetrate her and she grabbed my shirt the moment it hit her. Kissing me violently like I was resuscitating her. I started my thrust and it dawned on me what I had missed for so long just because that crazy Chinaza was pregnant. I went hard and she received me excellently. She was a good baller.
We were done before her mother would call her home.

My phone rang and I picked. Chinaza was on the line.
"Neche I want orange."
"leave me, go and pluck by yourself."
I cut the phone and faced my latest babe.

"So are we seeing again?" I asked as she brushed the sand off her skirt. She nodded. Why wouldn't she.

Sha sha. I led her home, didn't exactly get to their gate. Then I went home. The time by then was roughly 7:45 pm. Naza was already dropping her 10th missed call. I called her back.

"Neche please come, I am bleeding," she cried. I don't remember exactly how I did it but I think I jumped our gate because I didn't remember opening it. I guess I was falling in love with my unborn baby..


https://gistrealm..com.ng/2017/04/diary-of-broke-playboy-42.html?m=1

yellow237:
have been following this story like no tomorrow and and all i can say is that this guy is a real bomb.infact is like reading about my own life story although i have changed my life style cos that way no de pay at all. love d way u creat u character making them look so real like in a movie not nollywood tho.
once u finish this story jst come and c me for ur new house in banana island(lol).
Ride on ur story too sweet jareh .

Jeez. Lol . Thanks bro

kelvinhilton:
Nice one op.... King Solomon must be proud of u

Lol

gtin:
Hmmmm Chipappii now u are making me scared of getting any girl pregnant

Lol. Baba try and get one pregnant. E dy sweet small. But anything wey u see. No call me o

Girlfriends = 23
Side Chics = 27
Bang mates = 12
Crushes = 1 million
Secret Fantasies = 500 million
Milf fantasies = 100
Sugar mommy = 0

I just sketched a rough estimate of my Romance life since when I became aware that men were supposed to run after women. I can't even remember the age I grew that awareness but I can remember playing that infamous game of hide and seek with my classmate back in my nursery 2. Then our teacher would force us to place our heads on the desk and go to sleep. She would give me a Mouth Gig under the desk and then proceed to hide an empty cabin biscuit pack in her pant and ask me to find it with my hand. Y'all know how that would end up right. That doesn't matter though, I doubt if I even knew what I was doing.

So my details up there is to let you know that I am not as bad as most of us here lol. See, its just roughly 23 girlfriends up there since I was born, I know some of us here have more than 23 girlfriends as they are reading this thing now. See I'm actually a little bit of a good boy.

So recently, I decided to meditate on my life a bit. I ended making it all about Chinaza and the pregnancy. I started wondering if there is any other girl in my life I would have preferred to be the one in Chinaza's place.

I remember Maryann, she was so beautiful that I missed receiving holy communion once in the church because I was staring at her. She was 100 yards of everything I wanted and I got her for a period of time. Only problem was that I was 12 and she was 11. We only wrote love letters which we perfumed and rubbed sweet smelling powder on. Apart from that, no other sort of RUBBING took place. I am still looking for her shaa, I hope I find her one day.

Uju, Ujunwa. She was Ebony, a beautiful sort of Ebony. Met her when I just started with Chinaza. Small tits but her ass covered up for what she lacked in Boobs. She gave me the styles that busted my brain, even Cynthia couldn't do that. We hit it off for a while before she got married after her NYSC. I would have loved her to have a baby for me, only problem was that she was 25 and I was 17 and she was Chinaza's aunt. Jeez.

Azuka, she was beautiful and petite with a round ass and perky boobs. Those types of boobs that will flow down and then curve up with the nipple like a banana. She was bad and naughty in a way that I liked and can display her love for you even in the street. I was even shy at times. Can you Imagine. There was no problem with this one. Just that I was sharing her with my guy. While he was writing her text messages, I was reading them to her in her father's bedroom, on the bed each time. We shaa went our way and I didn't miss her much.

Then Jennifer, not the other Jennifer o, a different Jennifer. A combination of my sperm and her eggs would have produced nothing less than a Chris Brown. She had this way of kissing that could cover up for the sex that we never had. We still talk shaa but she is kinda far away from where I am and wouldn't want to take this stress of meeting her when I could easily find a good replica of her and her pussy. Only problem we had was that she only loved me fingering her. If we were still together right now, I know my biceps would have been as huge as. Fingering a girl like that beats hitting the Gym.

Who else, who else, who else? So many of them but I can't remember much again. Now Chinaza seem to be okay to me but I don't just understand her ways these days. I think it's the pregnancy thing. Someone cannot even drink garri and drop spoon for her. She is always wanting one thing or the other and she won't even want to have sex, that's the most annoying one.

That was how I was waiting for Amara to come home from the Market so I can beg her for a little kiss. Even if its 2 seconds. Chinaza called me that she wants fried rice. Me that can't cook jollof rice without over watering it or over salting it. And she said she won't eat take away, that I must cook it myself. The next thing she was threatening to come over to our house if I don't cook it. I don't even know if fried rice is actually fried in the real sense or if it's cooked.
Shaa I agreed to cook. My plan went this way, Amara would come back and when we are done with each other, she would whip up some rice and I will take it over to her.

I was still in my room, whatsapping away on my phone when my door opened. I looked at the door, hoping to see Amara. Chinaza just stood there, scolding me with her eyes.
"So this is where you are cooking the fried rice?"
"See Chianza, I don't even know how to cook rice, can't you just look for something else to eat, maybe garri and soup?"
"No I want fried rice."
She came and sat on the bed, I noticed her tommy was starting to protrude and she walked like a woman in a maternity hospital.

"Just cook me fried rice and we will.... "
She stopped half way and gave me a suggestive wink.
" We will what?" My heart was thumbing like I was checking my semester results.
"Baby, you know nah," she said and winked again. Hehehe, see me see youtube, searching for how to cook fried rice. Luckily, my moms no dy joke with food so all the condiments were there. We didn't have chicken but Fish was in the fridge.
The rice was ready in no time and served in my room. No dulling.

We drank the rice rather than eat it. The water in it no be here. She wanted fried rice. She got it.
"See eh, Neche, I don't want fried rice again. Just cook indomie."
"You are not serious, you will finish it o."
I was getting angry.
"I thought you wanted to do that thing that made me pregnant again?" she said eyeing me with a smile on her face.
"What do you want?" I asked.
"Indomie."

I shaa spent the whole day cooking indomie from there to making tea and back to Pap. In the end, just when she said she wasn't hungry again, after I had brought her Pap, my mother came back.

I spent the rest of the day Washing plates and pots and cleaning the kitchen. The rice went down the wastebasket and the pap with the tea went down Willie's stomach.

Like I always say. If Chinaza's doesn't kill me, I won't die.


http://gistrealm..com.ng/2017/04/diary-of-broke-playboy-41.html?m=1

Meanwhile house was agog with the news of my coming baby. I felt older all of a sudden. My sisters will hail me "papa junior" at the slightest chance, Willie automatically changed my name to C. Ronaldo while my mother never stopped asking when the baby would come, underage or overage, she couldn't wait to carry her child's child. Sometimes I wonder the type of family I was born into. Anyways, it made things easier for me.

Naza's parents weren't so easy or so hard to talk to. We were family friends and that made things milder. Her father and mine settled it over 2 bottles of Heineken and old time jokes about their girlfriends when they were my age.

As for me, I just wished Naza would remain pregnant for the rest of her life. Her belly wasn't showing the signs of it but her skin developed this kind of glow that made me want to take her to bed each time.

Our school had gone for Easter break so we were all at home. Naza spent more time in our house than she did in theirs. She did that because of Amara, lol. She didn't want us overplaying our brotherly love, if you know what I mean.

Meanwhile, I was getting too uncomfortable staying around my hood. I mean like all of a sudden, the whole place started booming with fresh chics. Nobody knew where or how they managed to find their way into our area.
The worst is while I am contemplating on hitting on one today, the next day, another will show up and I will just focus on her again. Confusion everywhere. And just when I thought that Chinaza was pregnant already, so we can Bleep anyhow without fear of pregnancy or period. She decided she was always too tired or not in the mood and worst still she won't leave me so I can find go and find a remedy to my problem.

"So Naza, why are you always tired?" I was asking her the day the something was trying to destroy me, after series of turning and upturning on my bed which didn't solve my problem.
She just rubbed my head and smiled, a beautiful smile that annoyed me in this time of my need.
"Neche I want to drink tea," she replied, rubbing my back like she was begging. The both of us knew it was an order more like "Neche go and make me tea."

The tea showed up in no time, anything that will make her drop the honey pot for me.
"The tea is still hot," she said and dropped the cup on the table.
"So what were you saying?" she asked me.
"I was trying to say that I need you."
"Yes, am I not here?"
"No, that is not the type of need I am talking about."
"Which type kwa?"
She definitely knew what I meant, I was sure but Naza was just being herself. How do I even explain myself to her without looking stupid?
"I mean, that thing we did that made you pregnant, I want to do it again."
I believe that was better. She shaa laughed and nearly poured the cup of tea away. I wasn't finding it funny, not when it's one week gone and I haven't even kissed anyone talk more of doing the other one.

"So right now, that is all you want?" she asked and I nodded.
"Well, I am pregnant, wait till I deliver!"
That was it. I was plain angry.

"What does that mean?" I asked, raising my voice small small.
"Don't shout, Your mom will hear your voice now and will start asking what is wrong, what will you then tell her?"
"Let her hear, why are you mean like this... Bla bla bla bla... "
I was really frustrated and I didn't hide it. She just sat there, staring at me as I vented my frustration on her.
After much ranting, she just sighed and fanned her tea with her hand. Nobody told me to calm down.

" See Naza, you know you are my only girl and I love you."
"So?"
"Just this once, eh nne?"
"Neche no."
Her reply was cold and final.
"I think I will just go out there and find myself a new girl," I complained, expecting her to change her demeanor or get jealous. She just blew air into the cup of tea.
"Please do if that will make you leave me alone," she said.
"Really?" I asked.
"Yes, but before you go, just make Pap for me, I don't want tea again."

Is that how pregnant people use to do?


http://gistrealm..com.ng/2017/04/Diary-broke-playboy-40.html?m=1

Lol. Thanks people



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*

stephenGee12:
Hope u aced it sha

Hoping on God o

"Someone lives really large."
Jaycee picked a chain off the shinning wooden table and examined it like a collector.
"Do you think it's really gold?"
Oscar shot him a look and shook his head.
"How do I know, never seen a real one before."
"Sure you haven't."

Jaycee scavenged the room more while Oscar kept to his cookie.
"Stan sure knows his cookies."
"And you sure are an idiot," Jaycee replied holding up a portrait photograph of Stanley and Maria. He caressed her face and shook his head.

"Do you think he really loved her?" Oscar asked, creeping up from behind him.
"I don't know but she probably fucking loved him."
He dropped the photo with a bang and the sound of a car pulling up in the front tarmac followed.
Oscar ran to the window and took a peek.
"He's back, new car."
"I can see that," he replied, looking down at the roof of the car.

Stanley walked up to the stairs, too occupied to notice that the door wasn't supposed to be open.

"Hey Stan," Jaycee called out as he opened the door. "Nice to meet you again."
He caught himself from tripping to the floor, he had never seen a ghost before.
"Jaycee?" He asked, the shock still on him, he walked the tiled floor slowly like he was walking on a knife edge.
"Yea, it's me, I obviously didn't die, but Maria," he started. "She died, Joseph too and August is so bleeped up."
"I know bro, hurts me how things went so wrong, I lost Maria too, not just you, I lost a friend in Joseph and the one I loved most, Maria, I lost her too and you don't know how happy I am to see you standing here."
He advanced closer as he spoke.
"Could you do me a favor?" Jaycee asked.
"What?"
"Just stand the Bleep where you are, do not come any closer than you already are."

He heaved himself up the table while Oscar sat on a couch, the plate of cookie on his laps. Stanley was the only one standing.
"Williams' still alive, are you aware of that?" Oscar asked and Stanley gave him a look that made him assume he never knew.
"He was killed at Town Square that day, how could he possibly be alive?"
"I don't know, he just is but then, what I find confusing is your parts in all this. You gave us away that day, you were obviously walking with the black Mercedes team, just like Williams is but you seem not to know much."
He searched his face for reactions and got a faked look of confusion.
"I don't understand what you are talking about," Stanley replied.

Jaycee drew the gun from his waist and pointed it at him.
"Maria got off the phone with you the day she was killed, she told you which way we were going and funny enough, the black Mercedes squad showed up, Stan, tell me, what is happening. Who wants us dead and why?"

"I think you are putting the right questions to the wrong person, trust me Jay, if I knew who it was, he would have long been dead for taking Maria from me."
He watched his face, trying to figure out how convincing he sounded. Jaycee's face showed no emotion, even if they were there, he didn't see them.

"How would you know? You are too inconsequential to know, you are just the bloody snitch and pawn you are known for."

A car pulled up to the front with a mighty screech, Jaycee looked away from Stanley and to the window, he grabbed the opportunity and pulled a pistol from his hips.
"Oops," Jaycee muttered and dashed away from the table, followed behind by hot bullets. Oscar threw his plate of cookies at Stanley and fell behind the couch.

"Sorry Jay, just doing my Job, a bloke's gotta survive."
He moved slowly with his back against the door, turned the knob and ran down the stairs. His car left within seconds.

"Jay, you okay?" Oscar asked, creeping out from behind the couch.
"I'm alive."
He held onto his bleeding hand and crawled out.
"I was grazed by the bullet."
"Let me see," he said, walking up to where he crouched on the floor. He raised the bleeding hand and nodded.
"Nothing Much, just a scratch."
"Yea, except that it hurts like a fucking heartbreak."

He helped up up and they walked to the door.
"Wait," Oscar said.
"What?"
"Gotta pick some cookies."
"Mad Bleep," Jaycee muttered.

Nancy squeezed her face tighter as she mopped up the blood from his arm.
"You know you have had a failed career if you ever tried out nursing," Jaycee whispered as he she worked on him.
"Never said I wanted to be a nurse."
"I know, just try and put a smile on that face, the look on it keeps making me feel like I am going to die."

"So Stan obviously does not know that Williams is alive, what does that tell you mate?"
Oscar said, walking up to them with a mouthful of cookie.
"That he is unimportant in the scheme of things," Jaycee replied, knocking off Nancy's hand as the pain of the disinfectant hit him.
"Could you just go easy on the hand? Please!"
"You know I hate blood," she complained.
"You love me, it's my blood, you should love it too."
"Yea, I should make tea with it."
He smiled and she caught it.
"August is leaving here, don't you think we should leave too? Before you set up a date with your death," Nancy commented.
"We will leave, after Stanley burns."

Oscar crunched on the cookie so loud they both turned their attention to him.
"Bro, sup with the cookie, could you stop already?"
"You need a bite to know what I'm going through here."
He handed him a cookie and he took it reluctantly, he took a bite and nodded.
"He sure knows his cookie."
He put the remaining piece into Nancy's mouth.

"Stanley obviously snitched you guys out to the Mercedes Guys but for who if not Williams?" Oscar asked.
"Definitely not for Williams, where would he have gotten the money for such big Gang, definitely not for Williams bro," Jaycee said, stretching his arm for bandaging.
"So you saying Williams and Stanley works for a common goal or more like a common boss?"
"I don't know anymore, don't know what to think but I will tell you what I will do."
"What?"
"I will decapitate both Stanley and Williams and use their heads for a teacup, guess it will give me some satisfaction."

"What a hell of teacup that will be," Oscar murmured.
"Yes, for your private and personal use only," Nancy said and knotted the bandage furiously.
"Ouch, cut off the hand already," Jaycee half yelled.


http://gistrealm..com.ng/2017/04/cold-35.html?m=1

Blood is thicker than water, even Akamu. I appreciated that saying at my dad's office.

So I and Willie popped into his place of work around 12 pm the next day after Willie have treated me to Nico and Vinc's "That's how you know you bleeped up" in mom's car.
We were blocked by his secretary. She wanted to call him before we can go in. Imagine, our own father. We relaxed shaa, we didn't want to start the day with more Bleep ups, knowing the sensitivity of our mission.

"He said you should wait a while before coming in."
She still had the phone to her ear when she passed us the message.
"What do you mean?" Willie protested.
"But he is our father!" I added.

"And so what? My friend wait there!"
That was my father shouting over the phone. We heard him Loud and clear. So we just mellowed and waited. We took a seat facing the secretary.

"So you mean shape wasn't a virgin?"
Willie nodded and winked at me.
"Jesus, so I had something like that under my nose and you just came and took it away?"
"You are still learning naa, how can you expect a girl like that to be a virgin."
I nodded and shook my head at the same time.
"Willie you are an Idiot."
He eyed me and laughed. The secretary eyed us and I was forced to look at her. My right eye observed her face on which she placed reading glasses like she actually knows anything. It reminded me of when I loved to watch women on glasses porn, they are always good looking.
Meanwhile, my left eyes was placed on my favorite part of the female body, not the boobs, the the other side.
She wore panties but the dark shade didn't let me know the exact color and her laps were thick. That allowed me estimate the size of her booty and I was wowed by my findings.

"I swear he is fucking this one, that's why she wore short skirt and pant instead of tights, to allow her pull off fast fast," Willie whispered into my ears.
"Who is fucking her?" I whispered back.
"Popsy naa."
I eyed him.
"Guy are you sure?"
"Dey there, you don't know your father."

Our gossips were still on when the door opened and her royal thickness walked out of his office. She was grabbing some files which she pinned to her inflated boobs. She was beautiful too. I just watched her catwalk to where we sat and I bet Willie too was watching. She beamed us a smile and we smiled back, I bet I showed my 32.
"Williams and his brother, how are you guys?"
"Fine fine," Willie answered for us two.
We exchanged pleasantries and she left. Then the secretary ushered us into the office.

"Is he fucking this one too?" I asked. "I like her."
"Don't you know Aunty Grace?"
I shook my head.
"After momsy, na her."
"So popsy bad like that."

Shaa we walked into the office and met our father. He observed us through the rims of his spectacles as we walked in. We pulled Seats and relaxed.
"Daddy good morning," we greeted.
"Eh, goodnight."
"Sorry, good afternoon," we corrected immediately. He sized me up and asked about school. I said fine, he nodded and switched to Willie.
"You, when are you guys resuming?"
"Ar ar, daddy we just closed naa."
"Are you sure they have not pursue you from school because David's daughter is not yet back."
"Which David's daughter?" Willie asked.
"That Yellow one, Mary Cynthia."
"So Mary is in my school?"
"Yes of course, don't you see her?"
"Dad how can I see her in a school as big as that?"
"Ok shaa, it's almost 1, come and buy something for."
He was pulling out his wallet when Willie coughed.
"O gini?" he asked.
"Dad we didn't come buy something for you, we came because something happened."
He looked at the two of us one after the other.
"What happened, have they suspended you from school?"
He was asking me. I shook my head.
"Are you in a cult?" I shook my head again.
"Did you impregnate a girl?"
Nothing from me, before he could ask any question again, Willie came to my rescue. God bless that boy for me.

"Dad, see what happened, shey you know Chinaza?"
"Who is Chinaza?"
"Erm, Uncle Laz's daughter, that fair one."
He nodded slowly. "His girlfriend?" he said pointing at me.
How did he even know she was my girlfriend. Daddy daddy.
We both nodded.
"Ehe, did you impregnate her?" he was asking Willie. Lol.
"Noo, see what happened."

He started spicing the story the same way I have told it to him the first time. From Chinaza falling sick to her going for test and all.

"Oho, I said it!" My father said as Willie finished.
We both stared at him as he tapped on his table. Shooting his eyes at the two of us. I didn't know if it was sweat or urine but my buttocks was all wet.

"So you went to school, instead of reading your books and coming out of there, instead, you got a girl pregnant. Did I tell you that I needed a baby from you?"
I shook my head, staring at the floor.
"My friend, look at me when I am talking to you."
I obeyed and he continued.
Willie threw his head to the ground, it's not that he was scared, he was only trying not to laugh and me too, I was trying my best to appear remorseful. My father has this way of yelling at you that instead of you feeling bad, you will end up laughing.

"I told to go to school and get me good grades, you say it is a baby that you want, if I wanted a baby from you, I would have married a girl for you, and I even thought you were better than this baby bush."
He was referring to Williams. Now the laughter was threatening to break out.

"All he knows how to do is grow beards and do make up....."
The tongue lashing shifted to Willie and if my sisters were there too, they would have gotten their own portion.

"Where is she?" he asked after he was done and had taken some breaths.
"Back at his lodge," Willie answered.
"Wait," he removed his eye glass and dropped it on the table. "This baby, is it a joint something, are the two of you responsible for it?"
"Noooo!" Willie shouted.
"Then why are you answering for him?"
"She is in my room at school," I shot in.
"You even live together at school?"
"No, she came from her school."
"I think you will have to start going to school from the house," he said.
"That's far!" Willie exclaimed.
"What is far, this one, he will be using public transport, back then, I trekked 20 kilometers to primary school everyday."
Even the look on his face showed that he too was shocked by what he just said. 20km gini.
"Daddy daddy, 20 km kwa?" Willie said, winking at him.
"You don't believe me? You can ask your mom, we walked to school everyday."
"So you were already mingling with mom as early as primary school."
I was already Fearing for Willie's safety when he asked this question but my father played it cool.
"My friend that is none of your business, but then, we trekked big time, you people of nowadays are just lucky."

That was how Chinaza's pregnancy was concluded and my father's primary school history took over. I didn't make much noise shaa, before he will come and notice me again.

"Ehe, come and buy me lunch at that restaurant across the street."
He pulled out 1k from his wallet and handed it over to Willie. We both stood up.
"Buy yours too, shey you will eat?"
He didn't need to ask.
"And call me that lady outside," he said, putting back his glasses.
"There are two girls," Willie informed.
"Call the one with the biggest breast."

Jeez, Why won't I impregnate a girl when I have a father like that. It runs in the family.


http://gistrealm..com.ng/2017/04/diary-of-broke-playboy-39.html?m=1#more

umufarha:
Thank god you only got someone prego and not that you've contacted HIV, or you expect to keep enjoying girl without having to pay for something. Congrats baba ikoko to be

babe please naa. Pity me

BlissfulJeff:
weldone bro

Thanks Bliss

tojahh:
I knew she's no Virgin. No Virginia clings to a guy like that without urge.



Or so I tot