Greetings my brothers and sisters, please i need your advice

My fiance and i got engaged last December. he is a truly amazing man and posseses all the good qualities of a husband. he is from Enugu state, im from Anambra state.

normal family investigations were conducted. it was found that his mother and my maternal grandmother are from the same family/kindred so the tradition according to the elderly women say that my fiance and I are forbidden to marry, that if we have kids they will die. our alternative is to do a ritual to break our so called blood link.

my fiance and i are christians and will not partake in such. iv told my pastor and he said he sees no close link between us that we can go ahead and marry because even in the bible the list of forbidden relationships among family members does not include my fiance and i . my parents advise i end things with him but i believe this man is my God sent husband and we are ready to fight this. if we were close cousins i would understand but our family tie is far. my theory is. if something is forbidden there should be no alternative. i need advice

no i shoudl be the one to thank u all for your advice. i just discovered this chat forum and knew that i would get help seeing as u all know how some nigerian men behave. its highly appreciated. have a wonderful afternoon and God bless

i cant believe i almost gave in. as they say if a relationship is not of god it will never last. he used to try and convince me that sex b4 marriage is good so that both of u will have time to enjoy and explore each other cuz apparently after marriage they will be no time to enjoy and be free cuz of children and family responsibilities and thhat a wife who is sso much into church is boring

I WILL. AS HARD AS IT IS. I CAN NEVER FORGET HIM. MY YOUNGER BROTHER SHARES THE SAME NAME AS HIM SO HE WILL ALWAYS BE A SAD MEMORY. I JUST WANT TO KNOW Y IS IT THAT A MAN WHO CLAIMED TO LOVE FOR THREE YEARS CAN ALL OF SUDDEN JUST FORGET U AND THE GOOD TIMES U SHARED AND MOVE ON SO QUICKLY TO AN EVEN MORE SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP JUST LIKE THAT AND FEEL NO ELEMENT OF GUILT OR REMORSE WHATSOEVER

thank u so much i feel much better. funny enough my church which consists of mostly the youth the message today was finding the right spouse. i realised i was dating a man who was walking me straight to hell. a heartless human being. i even pity the fiancee. Now i have another chance to find someone whom god has destined for me. iv also realised that one should never judge someone by their family background even if that person comes from a good catholic christian home.

well thats what it means she must have been with him all that time we were together in nigeria. u cannot start dating a woman for a month and already decide to propose not in nigeria it does not work like that. the girl is his sisters best friend she is close to his family so he has known her. she recently came back from london about a year ago after completing her masters from what my family told me. he has evn made the engagement it official on face book but when we were together he never put up a relationship status, last december i noticed he was not confortable with us going to common places like crunchies ect in enugu. i dont know y i was so blind. I sent him a message saying ill forgive him and wished him well in the future and his marriage. no thank u or same to u came out from his mouth. i want to tell my aunt what happened cuz she is the best friend to his mother but i guess it wont change a thing. the fact that he feels he did nothing wrong and shows no remorse its what hurts the most.

@ j boy how did u see my pics

well i will never displease myself to please others. i will try my best to forgive and forget. and it does not mean if a girl is still a virgin before marriage she will not be able to perform it does not always work like that. I know somewhere out there ill meet soomeone who will love and respect me and not put sex as basis of which our relationships will lie. he used to tell me that we should make love b4 marriage and enjoy cuz after marriage there will not be time to be adventurous cuz of family stuff. how sick is that

no i did not i told that i wanted to wait till marriage he said i was being unrealistic and selfish.s its difficult to accept the loss. i loved him so much i went into that relationship with good intentions. i told my parents about him my mother liked him cuz he comes from well respected family and strong christian home. i did not know he could turn out to be this wicked.

i need your advice im going through the worst emotional trauma. im a 21 year old igbo who dated an igbo guy of 28 years. it was a long distance relationship for two years he lives and works in nigeria while im in my final year of law in sa. i got back with him in nigeria last year after we broke up for six months. he convinced me that things would get better between us. so we got back together and things were going so well . he will always call me his fiance and all that. we were so much inlove, atleast thats what i thought. however after our last night in enugu he never called me again not even to wish me a safe journey back. so in jan i called him and told him that i could no longer handle his suddden change in attitude. TILL A MONTH AND A HALF LATER I FIND OUT FROM MY FAMILY WHO IS CLOSE FAMILY FRIENDS WITH HIS THAT HE IS ENGAGED TO MARRY THIS YEAR. i called him he even admitted it and said he only started dating her after our break up last month. he showed no remorse and told me he did not do anything wrong. i cant stop crying from this betrayal. i remember how at times he used to pressure me to sleep with him as his future wife which i never did so could this mean i was only a girl he wanted for sexual pleasure for two years.