₦airaland Forum

mmmmm sounds really delicious from your tone...I know your type

mysticgal: That would be babyish of me,i would rather do something else sensible...like getting on with my life.
*Eba and egusi soup is delicious but my damn life is more tastier,trust me,life goes on.*

I was still trying to build a relationship with her when it happen. As soon as we were established, I cut the ties. Honestly speaking, I wouldnt know if am being selfish here but I didnt see what I did as cheating, because our love was not really established not until the first time I came back

dmz: You had a little thing before in the UK when you guys were still dating. She had her own little thing when you were on a break and somehow it's all on her?.

You have already crossed the line yourself and shouldn't purnish her for something you're guilty of. Don't expect to get what you can't offer

its just a kiss you say...there is a saying that " its from clapping you start dancing"...so from kissing to...
anyway for me kissing, love-making, romance are all same family. From your comment I guess you dont see anything wrong with kissing other men while in a committed relationship

Adaeze003: Its just a kiss mr... stp being a baby about it...

Overly emotional men sha...

yea.. so a married guy I met in Abuja few days ago told me during our interaction. I know its not easy; but if we can conquer infidelity, it would be a lot easier dont you agree with me sister

Harmonyemerald: Holy cow!!!b!!!!! Seven relationships How old Are you now? Don't mind me shaa, I get you very well, u take the concept of faithfulness so well and you expect your partner to return the favour else it will be a deal breaker. Butnoone is above mistake, hence the concept of forgiveness. Am not asking you to go back to her, am just saying that you need to learn to be more flexible and forgiving towards mistakes in relationships. Relationship is work my brother, I tell u. It is really work. Sometimes, u will want to kill your partner, other dayz, u will just not wanna let go.

thanks bro...we learn everyday.wish you the same.

NairaMode: Funny man.
I personally don't speak out of the blues.
Practice?... I'm "living" what I preached.
Just sharing my mindset with you ni jare.

Wish you all the best bro.

If its the will of God, we ll come back...I believe in destiny

Mogenerous: You were grooming a relationship and had sex still, did you tell her then? Nope? If you had told her, how would she have felt? Bad? And probably forgive you? Maybe. Why not try forgiveness, like letting go of the past, am sure she felt bad enough already. If God had taken decisions like you did, what would have happened? Stop hurting yourself and try getting back... Happiness matters more

weird...u thinking

Vikky014: hmmmm.

you are really a genius on matters of the heart...If you practice what you preach, then every lady should be at your door for a relationship; if I had one I wouldnt mind giving her to you. I believe in forgiveness too, but like you rightly noted we make our own rules. for me its not a rule thing; its just who I am. I believe she wanted to test what cheating looked like

NairaMode: Well like you said you don't know my orientation.
I understand your mindset perfectly and it's as valid too. After all we all make our rules and we owe no one no apologies for it.
Let me tell you a bit about my orientation.
I don't see love the same way you see it.
In fact I don't believe love exist... I only believe in responsibility.
I believe love outside of the one God has for us (if you believe in God) is the only love there is. Humans just try.

That established.
"Love" as it were doesn't stop people from liking other people.
Even married men and women will testify to this...
We may love someone but we may love someone else more than our partner and that's because we are humans.
Just because we love someone else more however does not mean we now fail our partner and start cheating.
That's where responsibility comes in. That you are committed to someone else and you should stick to your choice already.
In fact that's maturity on the contrary.

Now given my mindset above, I believe there are circumstances that can make people falter.
Circumstances which to me are valid and which should give room for forgiveness or reasonable doubt. At least for once.
So like I said if someone cheats on you and you are able to logically peruse the circumstances and you have a forgiven spirit and you love the person then you can forgive a one time affair or more if you have the accommodation.

But for me, if it is more than ONCE then I would tie the engine of a Suzuki power bike to my legs.

are there shock absorbers when it comes to love...I can handle every other thing with the exception of cheating

crudedude: Its a cruel world OP. You really need to start developing shock absorbers.

In all my relationships this far, I v had to put up with a lot of things but when it comes to cheating; I take an exception. Am not perfect I know that already, but I cant help who I am. Wish I could still take her back because in my seven relationships so far, I have never loved anyone as I loved her...she was soo unique and special; I dont know what went wrong...maybe bad company

Harmonyemerald: It is a pity that yoou couldn't let it go. Am not blaming you, it is who you are. But that lady in question would have learnt one thing from you, never be honest with your partner. There is this saying, "hurt me with the truth, donot confort with a lie" but I guess with you, the opposite applies

thanks for the comment, I appreciate

Mondisweets: Im glad she now has a chance to move on with mature man, who doesn't blow trivial things out of proportion. U had broken up, i don't see why you are being a baby about it. If it was when u guys were dating that would have been a whole different thing.

Now that she knows what an immature man is like, she will be able to know what a mature one is like.

I have forgiven but I couldnt forget or put the thought off my head each time am with her

Vikky014: op do u believe in GOD?If yes do u know our LORDS PRAYER?.Dt means if u forgive odas God will also forgive u.so forgive her first!it is nt easy but try.

she said she felt bad and disturbed n couldnt put up with me if she didnt let it out; so I promised I wouldnt use it against her...............................................which I did

Exjoker: Truth they said is always bitter. You were wrong for breakin up with her just 'cause she told you the truth but it would have been better if u had told us her reason for tellin you bout the incident

nice one...destiny will take its course. I ll leave it in the hands of the Almighy

stanconnect: Bro...u get mind oo! am sorry if this is getting @ u, if u are a christian, I would like u to reflect back to the scriptures on this word that Jesus spoke; let him that has no sin be the first to cast the stone' no one could respond to this question, if u are a good bible reader u should know what they did...or u want me to tell u? ok...they all walked away!

Do u know that her likes are rare? How many times have u committed such offense or even one worse than that and told on it? If I where u, I will kneel down apologize to her and also make her the mother of my unborn kids

Imagine if men where to be God, where would we all have been?

It was while I was in the UK...JUST ONCE and that was because we met a couple of months before I left; so we were still grooming the relationship. As soon as it was obvious we were dating, I couldnt continue living a lie anymore

Mogenerous: Just one question and I hope you answer honesty.... Since you guys started dating, have you ever cheated on her?

I appreciate your comment...I must confess I still feel something for her in my heart. I v always wanted to move on but thoughts of her wont let me already. I v got another very beautiful n homely young girl whom I v know for a couple of months, but I dont think my heart is healed enough to get into an emotional stuff just now

tblacker: Hmmm, truth hurts. I am almost in the same shoes now dude although this was a past that i dug out but it still hurts like she cheat on moi.

I would advice that you go and get that girl back and live with whatever it is she told you, You know why?: That is what makes you a man and definitely broaden your mind. There is no perfect human being and am guessing that you have affection for her in the first place. Just try and forgive her even though you cannot forget. Marriage is for the mature minds, punish her for what she did and let her know that she is being punished for her weakness . The truth is, different stroke for different folks so no one can tell you how to deal with this case unless you sit down with a simple arithmetic of mind. Do you really want her.

well...i dont know your orientation but for me I believe true love takes a while to forget...I dont know your sex but if you are guy and you have some scratch with your woman n she cheats on you, you say its valid. There is God oh!!! always remember that

NairaMode: My opinion is you don't love the girl.
What if she had sex but confessed.
If the circumstances why a girl cheats on you is valid then it is best to forgive if for just once.

if you were her would you have done such to get back at your man...

mysticgal: some people sha

sincerely speaking I had a little thing in the UK...but during the three weeks of not communicating with her I never kissed another.

dmz: Just out of curiosity, did you kiss anyone while you were in the UK and during the little break?

we were not formally apart...just three weeks of 'no communication'...

andromida: I agree with you there was no reason for her to tell you about the kiss. You guys were broken when she kissed someone else.

am short of words...

Samyj247: I am a psychologist. Do you know why she told you? It was because, while kissing the guy, she was caught by somebody that knows you, and was afraid that that person will tell you, and she decided to just tell you, not knowing that the person did not say anything. THINK AM the truth has already set you free. Or do you want your wife to be kissed always by your gate man when you are out for work?

yea yea I commended her for that effort...i still miss her sometimes though, just that....................I think she shouldnt have allowed that happen within a short while; its disheartening you know

Justiyke4u: Think about it this way, if she hadn't told u the truth u will still find out and now u will be dealing with d issue of betrayal as well but now she summoned the courage to tell u the truth that's something because where there is truth there is love think about that if it had been u can u summon the courage on ur own to tell her? Think about that

Academically you wrong; you know why...God is a God of yesterday, today and forever, He never changes so whether they lived in the days of the old testament matters little. If God commanded them to serve Him the way they did back then, it would still be applicable now. Notwithstanding the fact the christians believe Jesus is a christian, I have the feeling that those who live according to His precepts have a chance as well; muslims, Hindu, Buddists, etc

biafran1stson: . Believing in the supreme being and preaching and practising good virtue is not enough to save. Jesus said I am the way , the truth and life, no one comes to my father except through me. That means u must accept him as ur lord And personal saviour before u are saved. Romans 10:9-13. As for the men of the old testament,Abraham, Moses, Elijah,elisha,Samuel, e t c , all of them lived in d days of old testament and yet they live a life of obedient to God, so God knows his people. Faith in Christ Jesus doesn't apply to people of the old testament, they were justified by the laws. So at the time of ignorance God overlooks .

some I think are better left untold...

amakufrancis: the truth they say is bitter.

I believe true love takes time to forget...talk more of moving on. So, to have kissed another just in few weeks means two things; either she was double-dating or she was not really in love. Thats why I quit

Samyj247: So someone thinks like me here, to me as long as she can be seduced by other guys up to dat extent, then even if we are married, she wil not stick to me alone. Bro u took a nice decision, instead of getn married to her nd discovering that she is a good kisser to other men.

thanks bro... noted

JEITO: Bro! Emotional people are always unstable and insecure and could make rash decisions.

Her reason for kissing the guy was wrong- you don't do wrong to get back at another person. But it was better she told you the truth, would you rather she hold back the truth to protect you

If you are afraid or uncomfortable with the truth, it is better you start working on yourself because in marriage, you'll be faced with many difficulties and demanding challenges that you'll have to tackle as a man. Being Emotional will not help you one bit.

tried severally but I couldnt...people say we could get back but am already considering moving on ...

Confussion2: Only kiss ur getting worked up !!

Let it go bro. I bet such girl is a rare breed 4 her to be sober bcuz of a mere kiss. Shez 4 keep if u ask me unless ur tired of her.

Mine tried braking her virginity when we had our own problem. She cudnt because according to her it was too painful. Dude gat confirm if d kush is still intact b4 I continued with her. Point is if she goes out of the way and feels soo sorry to let u know, 4give. The second time, well u show her d exit door.

emotions do play out...sometimes lies are better told for the greater good

Waspy: Is that your excuse for finally breaking up with her , your first attempt failed because of your regard for her mother

Love covers multitudes of sins...She did it to get at you( in her heart) and she was innocently truthful to tell you?

Why are you suddenly feeling bad.....guilty conscience I guess.

Truth they told us will set us free...how true is that in matters of the heart.

I had dated my last girl for two years...to cut the long story short; we had some scratches after my return from the UK which led to some distance between us. We didnt speak for over three weeks, but later got back when her mum called me on the phone one nite to ask what was amiss. We buried the hatchet and moved on...few days later she said she was feeling bad about something that happened during our little break " a guy had kissed her and she returned the kiss with all pleasure TO GET BACK AT ME"...that was the last straw which broke the camels back because being the very emotional guy I have always been, I forgave her but just couldn't put behind the thought of her in an emotional kiss with another man. Today we are no more because of the truth...I wish she never told me about it because if she hadnt, we would still be together as it was already a closed deal between our families...I regret that conversation that day and I really wish she never told me the truth.

there was a typo so i misunderstood...you could be right but from the academic point of view; where do other religions which believe in the supreme being and preach good virtues just like christianity fall...I thing that from the academic perspective that Jesus came for all like I now understand you to mean...His preaching of christainity coming under the new testament does not quash the old testament as He said" I have come not to abolish the law 'old testament' but to fulfill it. The law as moses and other prophets established 'form of worship, sacrifice etc' you would agree with me seem more like idol worshiping from the new testament form. so were those prophets in the old testament non-christians from your personal view point

biafran1stson: read the last line of my comment.

you dont seem to get my point...am not doubting whom they are; the bible made us understand that Jesus was sent to save the whole world. We christians believe that, so do you believe that He came just for the christians; what about other religions that preach good living amongst other good virtues. They still believe in a supreme being which I believe is God. so where do they belong or end up after having lived a virtuous life...see this from an academic perspective not a religious one please

MightySparrow: Muslims are referred to ad Mohammedans is Mohammed a Mohammedan?


I see hypocrisy here, agabagebe.

so He came for only the christians...notwithstanding the fact that the bible is the oldest authority on religion per se, you know that majority of those who brought us christianity do not believe in God. But that is aside, my concern is the interpretation of whom Jesus came for; just christians or the enrire world.

RockMaxi: Acts 11:26 And when he had found him, he brought him unto Antioch. And it came to pass, that a whole year they assembled themselves with the church, and taught much people. And the disciples were called Christians first in Antioch.

Rev 22:13 I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end, the first and the last.

Rev 22:16 I Jesus have sent mine angel to testify unto you these things in the churches. I am the root and the offspring of David, and the bright and morning star.

Christianity means "Christ like", the disciples were called Christ like in Antioch because of the resemblance in actions to Jesus Christ. So read the above scriptures and get the understanding.
The quotes from Revelation is to tell you who Jesus is.