₦airaland Forum

hbpeze:
PS-I did not disvirgin her,that's too na part of the reason I wan free am.cus I wanna marry a babe I disvirgined.

then go for wat u want. Simply allow her to go... She's nt worth all these headache

wen has cryin solved anythng? If dem break ur heart na cry b d next thing?

cr80vity:
guys tell us whr u met the love of your life...share urs as ds wil b fun cux u wil b shocked wen u see whr sum met their lover

where did u meet urs? U shud tell us den we follow suit

justmag:
In my sweet dreams...

Vaseline crew vice president

innervoice:
Children aren't stu_pid.

A dolphin isn't stvpid either bt stil doesn't understand d human language, wats ur point?

vfactor:
The point is that u think children don't understand. U need to read researches about them and observe them more. Children can quickly tell when your action differ from your words.

Eg. You tell your 5yr old boy not to lie and almost immediately u received a phone call and u tell the person on the fone that you re not at home, while u re at home. Tell me the child won't understand.

My bro, children decode more than you know

I'm nt askin u to lie in front of a child, d main point was if u made a mistake wud u apologise. If someone calls and u lie wud u apologise to ur own child?

innervoice:
A child whose parents are real will develop more trust than a child whose parents are fake.

Hw wil u knw ur parents are fake if u can't understand d meanin of fake/real? These ar kids nt adults pls try and understand

Anywhere sef, except nairaland

Voting poll

vfactor:
What is it based on? Failing to admit a mistake, when everyone knows u re wrong?

If trust were based on love and care couples won't b havin d issues dey have these days and divorce won't b rampant... Trust is based on knowin d decision of d person ure trustin is always goin to b right

I jus see one guy holding anoda girl's jaw, mayb he wants to slap her

Wats his gf's name? Ice princess?

tcalc:
when someone was clearly wrong and did not apologize for their behavior. It caused a lot of resentment when we felt we were unfairly treated. children have an acute sense of fairness. Resentment grows and eats away at good feelings and a barrier grows between children and parents.

u cudnt b more wrong darling, children have zero sense of fairness... Dats why dey need parents,

ammyluv2002:
Lol..lies! Look, those kids have brains too so they know if their parents aren't the perfect role models so they don't need to fake it.You think they don't see abi you think they don't dicuss family matters with their friends even at a very tender age. Pls, let's not deceive ourselves here cause respect is earned.

If they see u and dey talk abt it to their friends do u really think apologisin is d next step if u offend ur child? Calm down for a second and think abt dis... U offend ur child, so u apologise?? Why?? So ur child knws ure sorry?? So wat wil he/she gain from knwin ure sorry?? Dey won't forget wat u did and dey wil stil talk abt it... A child dt sees a human being being killed doesn't knw if its wrong or right... Dts why dey tag dose films +12, +16 dey just want to emulate, dey dnt hav sense of judgement, ur apology is jus anoda piece of word from "my mom" or "dad" to d child

afolag:
ar u saying is customary, custom or cultural? what is your argument.

I won't even dignify ur mindless question wit an answer

winetapper:
so whats the right way to let them know we are wrong and sorry about it

There's no way... Let it go, wen dey grow up dey wil understand... My parents made mistakes, I now understand dat

vfactor:
Since he understands its a mistake, he now knows u re not perfect and your moral guidance cannot be trusted, according to you.

I think parents should let children know that adults make mistakes too. The amount of love and care you show them is enough for them to trust you

Trust isn't based on love and care bro...

winetapper:
yeah i am learning some thing here.. But are you trying to say one shouldnt use the word sorry when refering to her children

Just like u wudnt say "fvck u" to ur child if he/she offends u, u shudnt say sorry either

ammyluv2002:
U see? That's what I'm talking about! It's not okay to tell a child "don't lie to anyone" without letting the child know why lying is bad. We all have feelings no matter how old. A child needs to be heard also, you just don't treat them like sticks

When u tell a child its bad to lie, its nt until u lie dt u do dt... I never said anythng abt treatin dem like sticks, bt u hav to condition their mind to d prospect dt ure a perfect role model until dey ar matured enof to understand wt life is all abt, children ar nt adults dnt treat dem like adults, if u hav a dispute wit an adult, u fight or engage in arguments, u can't do dat wit a child, so also u dnt do some other things meant for a matured mind

vfactor:
So you think the child doesn't know u re wrong?? You re only preparing the child to be an adult who never admits his mistakes!

Take for example you purnish a child for what he didn't do and it later becomes clear to everybody that he didn't do it, will u still be claiming your right? You re increasing the amount of disdain the child will have for you.

If u punish a child for wat he didn't do u wud never do dat intentionally, and if d child knws u made a mistake den he understands, if he doesn't knw its a mistake den he doesn't need to

winetapper:
its more fact to show no one is perfect...and one needs to know the cause of the failure and amend it..
But if you didnt apologise the children would think the parents mistake is right

If u apologise, all ur actions from dat day hence forth wil b subject to doubt in d eyes of d child... If u make one mistake dnt think d solution is apology, apology is meant to make d oda party feel good, it doesn't right a wrong... Dnt confuse it

winetapper:
at least its better they admit they are wrong and try tell them their mistakes and take correction

Dey wil look at u and tell u "hw do i knw ur correction isn't anoda mistake?"

ammyluv2002:
That Parents are always right and owe no explanation to their kids on any action they decide to take that's the mentality I'm talking about here

Why wud u owe ur child an explanation for ur action? If d child isn't matured enof to understand why u did watever u did den d child isn't matured enof to knw wat u did is wrong either

winetapper:
bro the mentality is that pride that makes you think you always perfect

Wen it comes to parenting u can't allow ur child to knw ure nt always right...

winetapper:
hmm but they should lead by example tho..

If dey ar ur example and dey apologise dt means dey ar admittin dey ar wrong... If ur example can b wrong, won't u find a reason to find anoda "more superior" example?

ammyluv2002:
Well said but it's not really a cultural thing, rather it's just our mentality.

why do people always say dis? "Its our mentality" wats d mentality here?

tcalc:
It’s not part of our culture for adults to admit wrong doing to children, even when it’s obvious they are at fault. In reality, when a parent apologizes to a child, it further cements the parent-child relationship and provides the child with a sense of safety and well-being.

I dnt agree wit dat, if u apologize to a child d child wud feel ur imperfection and knw u can't always b ryt, d child won't see u as a moral compass anymore... Its like havin a computer dt u found out is liable to mistake, wil u stil hav complete trust in it?

winetapper:
Nigerian parents find it pretty hard to say sorry..
The closest sorry you would hear is
Have you eaten
Is it pride or your opinion.

Its pride. If u offend an 8year old u wudnt apologize either

NoMoreTrolling:
Yeah, guess your right! Back then I cut distractions out cause I was trying to make a 1st Class.

Now, guess I need to do it for my future family and myself, so we never go broke. Going broke does scare me a lot.

Its just hard to say, all you're gonna do is work, save and invest till your money is at a certain level, without giving into girls (taking multiple girls out) and other distractions like excessive smoking.

I guess I have to find a way to embrace the pain I feel when I'm feeling bored or restraining myself from spending unnecessarily.

Thanks!

U hav ur answer bro. Ure welcome

Youngpo413:
thank you for making me laugh

Lool

They av different spellings!!!