₦airaland Forum

My Wife’s Salary Was a Mystery Until I discovered How Much She’s Truly Worth

In 2016 she told me her salary was N35,000. And then two years later, when she got promoted, I asked about her salary and she said, “Oh these people, don’t mind them. They added only N8,000 to my old salary. Because of her meager salary, I’ve taken up so many responsibilities in the house without complaint. I pay for utilities and pay for food. I pay the fees of our two kids, clothe them, and take care of their medical bills. When my wife sends me a grocery list, she adds sanitary pads. She buys dresses and clothes, comes to show them to me, and asks me to pay for them. She started talking about a car when our second child came in. Things weren’t good on my side so I asked her to give me some time. She said, “I’ve saved something. I can add it to what you have so you pay me when your money comes.”

I agreed and took that money from her, topped it up to get her a car. For three months my ears never rest. She would wake up at dawn and ask me to pay what I owed her. I got tired and paid the money when I didn’t have much in my account.

One evening, I turned my laptop on and saw a lot of emails. I checked and it was my wife’s email that had been opened. I asked her, “Did you use my laptop?” She answered, “Yeah I was checking something.” I told her, “Then you didn’t log out.” She answered, “I forgot. Please log out for me.” I was about to log out when something caught my attention. I saw a mail with the subject, “January Payslip.” I opened and started going through. When I saw her gross salary, I was shocked. N654,734? And this girl has been crying poverty?

I went through the details. That night I couldn’t sleep. I was angry. I felt let down. I felt cheated. I felt played. We’ve been married for six good years and my wife earned that much without my knowledge? How much she earned didn’t bother me a lot than what she was using that money for. I decided not

Keep up the good work.

To my story.
I have been married for twenty years and it has been blissful with four children. I and my husband adopted a child years before we got married. It happened that while we were dating, a neighbor who was a single man had a daughter, whose mother ran away to another man after giving birth and life was so difficult with them, she left the man and the baby to another man. The man brought the baby to me and I was the one caring for the child when the man goes to work then he helps people in carrying loads in the market. Even at night the baby sleeps with me. I took this baby everywhere and people believe she is my child. Tragically the man died one day while carrying loads, he fell off the staircase and was badly injured. It was my husband who took care of the hospital bills even after he died. During his burial just few people came , his brother he always talked about came and buried him. We thought he would demand for the child, or maybe on the burial day the wife would come to take her child. Janet, I prepared the baby, packed few of her things that was in my house and was ready to hand her over to whoever would come for her from the man's family. But no one came. They only carry her and gave her back to me. Her mother did not come. After the burial everyone left. I came back with my boyfriend, now my dear husband. We took the baby to his brother when he came to pick some of his things, he said he doesn't even have a house of his own and he's not married. He gave us two thousand naira and said we should continue caring for the child. Janet that was how we cared for the child date. We got married when she was four years and my husband said, before she's five years and no one comes for her we would adopt her legally. She clocked five years and Janet no one came, no one ever asked of her. No message from anyone to us. We adopted her legally. She is our first daughter, our ada whom we adore so much, very brilliant. And is in a private University.

she introduced her boyfriend to us two years ago. And now they are fully ready to get married. We do not have contact of any of her father's family, not even her father's brother, because there was no phone then, he refused telling us his address. And even her father was buried in the cemetery, which the service was also conducted there.

My husband is not bothered about any of this, he said he adopted her and would not go looking for anyone. He has already given the boy's family list. But I am worried. We have never mentioned any of these to our daughter, she believes we are her biological parents. Do you think it's time we let her know the truth, though my husband is not in support of this? Personally I wouldn't want to do this, but for the sake of tradition. I need to hear others opinion. Should we go ahead with the marriage or look for her family? Is there any need to tell her anything? I love my daughter so much and wouldn't want to do things that would affect her later. Please advise me.

People dey marry sha!!! Chaiii. Virtuous women has seen a lot.

This is urgent. Post immediately you see this. Please pardon any mistakes. I’m not coordinated. I’m a married woman of 3 kids. 8years, 5years and 1 year old baby. I’m a market woman. My husband drives keke. I have seen shege in this marriage but I’m not here to lament. I just want to talk about what happened now and the best way I can pvnish this stupeed man I called husband. You know the situation of country affected all businesses. We’ve not been able to pay our children’s school fees. My husband lamented bitterly about not having money. I break my safe and I brought out 120,000 I’ve been saving since January. And gave him to complete and pay our children school. The fee is 140,000. It’s with abeg that the school allowed them take exam. I leave for market 4,30 am to be able to buy food stuffs cheap before it enters resellers hands and I told hubby to go and pay the fees before going to work. This night, I asked him how far. He said his keke jam person and he used the money to repair the persons motor. I waited till after he slept and I went through his phone. He didn’t know I know his password. Nurse chi, I found out that my husband’s side chick is pregnant. I suspected he’s che@ting but I don’t know with whom. That is not even my only problem. My husband gave his side chick my hard earned money to comot belle. I want a planned deal after I’ve recovered my money. I want to pay that side chick a visit. I’ve gotten her name through true caller and I’ve seen her social media handle. I’m trying to get her house address. Please advise me. My head is full. How do I pvnish my husband and his side chick. I want them to feel the same pain they caused me in this marriage . The id£i0t is sleeping like zo_mb_ie right now. I feel like st@#b£ing him to de#@#th He is a d&£m!on in human form.

Where can I find the "submit" option? I've searched and searched but couldn't find it. Please, help me.

...

truthsayer009:
DON'T GO PLEASE.

Life isn't always about money any longer especially when family is involved. The grass is always greener at the other side so be careful.

You have a great relationship with your husband and children, you have a good business going, you have a good social life.

Why do you want to spoil that for a new job that you are not even sure is fulfilling?

It will affect your children because they would need to make new friends, adapt to new teachers.

Stay where you are!

Well, thanks for your advice.
A Federal government job offer is always better.
Right?
It's just the location I'm worried about.

ayeesha:
You will enjoy lokoja cos it's generally peaceful and quiet. Accommodation is affordable with good schools too. The weather can be very extreme whether it's hot or cold but you'll get used to it . Food is also very cheap depending on seasons cos I send for certain food items from home. ( popsie lives there). Can't say much about social life cos I was an indoor person while at home. All in all, cost of living in lokoja is okay especially given the federal job your husband has gotten.

Okay. Thank you.
It's like you are from Kogi.
I'm glad cost of living is okay there.
Do you have an idea of how much a 2 or 3 bedroom flat costs in Lokoja?

1030:
Lokojo is far better than any capital in North East,U wont have problem with the hot weather because same appear in North East.

Nice private schools are available for kids,state polytechnic and Federal university are in lokoja with less than one hour drive to Salem university which is private.

As for your job, teaching will be for a start.

Okay. Thanks Dear.
For the job, do you have an idea of what they pay teachers? Or bankers?
For business, do you have an idea of the kind of business that will thrive in the area?

graciamore:
lokoja is a very good place except for the heat, there are also good schools there.

Thank you.
How about good accommodation?

Should we relocate to Lokoja, Kogi State for a Federal Job?

My husband and I have been in a dilemma between moving to Lokoja or remaining where we are. A Federal government job offer recently came up in Lokoja for my husband with a slightly better salary but we already have somethings going on for us were we are now (a local government area in another North Central state). My husband works with the government here while I'm running my own business. We have kids.

My worry now is that I don't know how Lokoja environment is. Moving over there means starting life afresh. We have no one there. I'm worried about what I'll be working on there, the social life. I don't know if there are good schools for the kids.

Please, is there anyone who has an idea of life in Lokoja. Is it worth the risk of leaving everything we have here behind? What job opportunities are there for graduates like me? Is Lokoja a nice place to be in?

I need advice, Please.