Ovokoo:
Hundreds and thousands of inter tribal marraiges are happening every year in Nigeria, so things are changing.

AM GLAD TO HEAR THAT BRO.... MAY GOD CONTINUE TO MAKE SUCH GREAT CHANGES HAPPEN IN OUR FAMILIES. MAY GOD TOUCH THE HEARTHS OF THOSE FUELING THE TRIBAL WAR AND DIFFERENCES

OMAR12:
now let me bring u up to speed with the reality of thing not infatuation, and I ask will you be comfortable sharing the same house with ur in-laws as a man for years without complaining? say the truth. can u and ur wife relocate down to the east so to be closer to them?? even if u don't want them to stay in the same house with u, can u help them relocate closer to u as u have suggested and foot the bills??. I wait for ur answer. what u don't know is that when an igboman is tired of is sojourn he retires to the east and when he is in the east there is nothing u will do outside his village that will take him away from his village. so their relocating down to ur house or close to where u stay is out of the picture, we can't change ome na ala Igbo. just to suit ur idea of love. east, west home is best.

For me '' Impossibility is nothing '' Their is no point giving excuse for an answer I will rather push hard and improve where necessary and I surgest you do the same bacause if u are straight with God and he give give you a wife he will surely give you everything you need to take care of her including doing your rights to the family as well. East, West, North or South no wahala provided it is Naija and it is peaceful. Please check out the definition of HOME from the dictionary.

OMAR12:
bro! so she will be taking care of her parent from miles and miles away bah.. yo talking about love, love for family will always surpass that of an individual. her family's welfare will always come first. that in a way is LOVE. also u can't dispute the fact that both men and women from ur ethnicity are bound to cheat. am not saying that my ethnicity is perfect BT it on a lower side. divorce is also on a higher side when it comes to ur ethnicity due to the complexity of ur society.

Well, thank you for you view and opinion but my brother, I THINK YOU NEED TO READ MORE and enlighting your mind. What will happen if you relocate close to your inlaws area or vicinity don't u think that is posible, what is wrong if your parents stay with u ? my brother STOP THINKING MICRO! Please think large and you will see a bigger and broader picture of LOVE. When u love a girl you will love her together with all her family. Love is not confined to area or distance LOVE IS VERSATILE and it knows no Bound. Please read the Bible and if u are a Muslim read the Holy Quran, read books, listen to successful lovers and read more about LOVE then your thought and mindset will be refined. Thanks and God Bless you ........

OMAR12:
my man aside from what awolowo did that caused the death of millions of my people, Yorubaland is far from home, if a babe from Enugu marries a man from asaba or aba.. it will be quicker for her to rush home should the need arises. especially if she is the first daughter, first daughters are not allowed to marry too far from their village in question. unless their parent are well to do. aside for that ooo, me I won't advice my sister to marry a yorubaman rather she should stay at home, reason being that Yoruba men are not family oriented, I have been in Lagos for more than 20years. the chances that they may cheat on u is 8 out of 10. u can hardly find a Yoruba man that doesn't have a child outside before he turns 24, so ladies shouldn't be surprised if a child pops out from somewhere and claiming ur man to be his daddy.

Am laughing in Spanish language hehehehe. Show me a ''perfect'' man and I will tell you his weakness. Stop generalizing issues. Please remember this proverb that says '' Every white pap/akamu/ogi comes out from a black pot'' I hope you understand. Our life is a matter of choice, what make you think your thought is right and even if it is, my brother, '' I AM DIFFERENT and so are YOU too because I am myself not someone else, AND YOU ARE YOURSELF TOO NOT SOMEONE ELSE. Talking about distance, I must say you are wrong because TRUE LOVE KNOWS NO BOUND and no place is too far for LOVE. TRUE LOVE GIVES NO EXCUSE it's only deceitfulness that gives excuse. Brothers and Sisters of my generation PLEASE MARRY FOR LOVE and that may be the first step towards you fulfilling God's will because GOD IS LOVE

jopretty:
That's a good one, bro. I'm not saying disobediece to one parents is right, but when it comes to matters of the heart and future partner, they should let us be. If the only problem parents have with our chosen partner is based on tribe, then they have no reason to hold us back whatsoever.

Now what is the best way to pass these messages to our parents because they are not bearing our pains they do not know what we suffer emotionally by the kind of dissensions they make for us. How can we make them understand?

DarlingtonJ:
Thanks for your understanding. YES every good parent will protect their children but who is the problem or WHAT is the problem we are talking about here? its HOLDING BACK LOVE because of the offence of our fathers. Though we are burn by these parents but it does not mean we should or will follow their own ways of life. So it will be justifiable not to judge a son by the fault or offence of the father. THe truth is who soever I LOVE, I WILL NEVER HUT!!! That is my own way of life not my father's.

I will like to know you better can I have your phone number? am Darlington and my phone number is - 08136975775

catal:
I understand your point ,but unless you choose to deny that there's no tribal tension in nigeria , you wont blame the parents that are trying to protect their children(especially females). Me, i run as far away from problem and dont just walk into it to see what happens.

Thanks for your understanding. YES every good parent will protect their children but who is the problem or WHAT is the problem we are talking about here? its HOLDING BACK LOVE because of the offence of our fathers. Though we are burn by these parents but it does not mean we should or will follow their own ways of life. So it will be justifiable not to judge a son by the fault or offence of the father. THe truth is who soever I LOVE, I WILL NEVER HUT!!! That is my own way of life not my father's.

boobyman:
My sister u are so right. Let me use myself as an example. Am from Edo state and the woman I want to marry is togolese and Calabar . My parents where against it especially my mother and even when I wanted to marry from my place they still stood against it because it's not what dey want. I admit it was a foolish thing I did for lots of years just because I want to please them and they don't even care about my feelings. Now am holding on tight to this Togolese lady who grew up in Lagos . I simply following my heart not caring what my parents thinks. Am standing on my decision as a man.

You will soon realize that is the happiest decision you have ever made in life because that is how it works. You follow you hearth and you find happiness

catal:
i still find it hard to understand wats difficult in marrying your own .it saves you a LOT of drama

You forget to remember that people don't just choose its the hearth that chooses. In life we do not have the opportunity or privilege to choose our parents, we cant choose the day we want to be born to Earth neither can we choose the day we will die but the only thing we can choose in life is our life partner. Its better to marry your friend than just a husband or wife!!!

DarlingtonJ:
Even Hiroshima done Forgive U.S. Haba....... Please let forgive and let love lead.... the youths tell your old ones that we need love in our generation and not transfer of aggression and God will Bless you even more.[quote]

Lets pass these messages on to our parents and make the world a better place by our own little efforts

DarlingtonJ:
I think it is better to be fear and Irrational about this issue. Do you realy mean you are holding back all those grogginess in your hearth these this happened decades ago and any leader who is preaching or teaching you to block the flow of love is your real enemy because i can tell you that '' nothing good comes out of hate''!!! all you need is a bit of love and your wounds will be healed beside this same yorubas you talk against are not Awolowo and they have shown love in many ways and have accommodate the Igbos for decades and ain't complaining and will continue to accomodate and welcome them till forever because of the love for peace/peacefull co-existence . This does not mean Yorubas are perfect neither are the Igbos perfect although choices, languages may be differnt but LOVE is a universal language that EVERY MAN HEARS, FEELS, KNOWS AND UNDERSTANDS and FORGIVENESS IS KEY. Even animals knows the meaning of love, they hear it, they feel and they show it also much more we humans. Love is a language understood by even the blind and the deaf. My question to you is being a normal human, LOVE or HATE which would you prefer

Even Hiroshima done Forgive U.S. Haba....... Please let forgive and let love lead.... the youths tell your old ones that we need love in our generation and not transfer of aggression and God will Bless you even more.

OMAR12:
that your business, who needs ur apologies?. now the casualties suffered from that single act alone was more than the entire military men killed on both side. so tell me, which was far greater, the casualties of the military men or the innocent souls starved to death. if the war had continued without that declaration and blocked of food we would have know who truly won the war. if the blocked of food didn't happen, the casualties would have been less than 800,000 soldiers. u do not have an excuse for consciously killing innocent women and children who where civilians.

I think it is better to be fear and Irrational about this issue. Do you realy mean you are holding back all those grogginess in your hearth these this happened decades ago and any leader who is preaching or teaching you to block the flow of love is your real enemy because i can tell you that '' nothing good comes out of hate''!!! all you need is a bit of love and your wounds will be healed beside this same yorubas you talk against are not Awolowo and they have shown love in many ways and have accommodate the Igbos for decades and ain't complaining and will continue to accomodate and welcome them till forever because of the love for peace/peacefull co-existence . This does not mean Yorubas are perfect neither are the Igbos perfect although choices, languages may be differnt but LOVE is a universal language that EVERY MAN HEARS, FEELS, KNOWS AND UNDERSTANDS and FORGIVENESS IS KEY. Even animals knows the meaning of love, they hear it, they feel and they show it also much more we humans. Love is a language understood by even the blind and the deaf. My question to you is being a normal human, LOVE or HATE which would you prefer

taoheedoriloye:
Well, move on bro.that is part of stories to tell in future.
But why is your heart is a glass type? Broken into pieces just like that?

you simply dont undrstand what it means to give ALL, I mean ALL. My main problem is what can we do to stop this tribal war it is causing our generation alot of problems, should parents still be choosing for their children at this age? i KNOW ALOT OF PEOPLE WILL BE GOING THROUGH THIS SAME THING IN SILENCE and are dieing inside but I feel its time for Nigerian youths to stand up against TRIBALISM. Its time we start choosing what we want for ourselves... we are not just the leaders of tomorow our leadership should start from today!!!

jopretty:
Hmmm, I feel your pain and truly sorry for what you are going through. Lucky you are a man and can pick any lady of your choice in the nearest future. A friend called me yesterday, crying her heart out that a man she's been dating for over 10yrs just call it quit all because his mum doesn't like her 'cos she's from imo while he's from anambra and this is the same guy that has been on his knees begging her to stay with him when he had nothing. Pls take heart and know that she isn't meant for you, cos if she was, she'd fight for her heart and love...I've seen such.

thanks its just that am so down that I dont know what to do or how to get out of this pains and bitter esperience

Am a victim of tribal difference a bleeding hearth and need to air my mind.
Will this Tribal war ever stop?
Why is their so much hatred among the Yoruba and The Igbos
It hurts to the soul to see that in this modern generation our parents will still let TRIBALISM LEAD there hearts and decisions instead of LOVE
I have been dating her for two years with all sincerity and loved her to the soul, its beyond what I can easily explain and she love me too.The mother will say ''just tell him to be ready to build two houses'' usually said with joke. With hope and Love I kept on and I was Loving harder.... I offered all the love I could and ever gathered on earth. We prayed about it and it was told that her families won't accept westerner and even if they accept they will cause alot of trouble in the future but with this she sounded strong and we were ready to pray it out. She then traveled to the East with the hope of having a hearth to hearth discussion with her mother but Surprisingly at the point of discussing marriage they started this problem of Tribal issues and saying Lagos is too far from Enugu, whereas this lay has been staying in Lagos for over 12 years. Just today the 4th Of November the lady called me after all pressure, what I call ( fearful brain washing) and treat of death by her mother she finally surrender to them her family members and she was told not to pick a husband from the West or North but if she picks among themselves in the East they will allow her. She normally gives me hope but suddenly all hopes are gone and my life i must say will not remain the same because I offered ALL MY HEARTH TO HER. It feels like the end of my life. CAN I STILL GET BACK TO MY FEET?

BlaqCoffee109:
i feel sorry for him,because he did it out of pressure and duty..trust me,he just acquired a window dressing...thing is another IBO guy who would give anything for me to accept his proposal..his ex was an Edo babe whom he told me he loved to bits but his father fought against his settling down with her and told him to bring home an Igbo girl..in his search for an Igbo girl,we met..but I just from the get -go don't want anymore of the drama..but he claims he is ready to be his own man and marry his choice...

That was a nice decision you made most girls would not have such decisive power.

The Grace to Hold-on Stedfast, not and never to depart frm the right way, that, I pray for