₦airaland Forum

^Thanks

One day I met a sweet
gentleman and fell in love. When
it became apparent
that we would marry, I made
the supreme sacrifice and gave up eating beans.
Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on
the way home
from work. Since I lived in the
countryside I called my husband and told him
that I would be late because I
had to walk home. On my way, I passed by
a small diner and the odour of
baked beans was more than I could stand.
With miles to walk, I figured
that I would walk off any ill
effects by the time I reached home, so I
stopped at the dinner and before I knew it, I had
consumed three large orders of
baked beans.
All the way home, I made sure
that I released all the gas. Upon my arrival, my husband seemed
excited to see me and exclaimed
delightedly: "Darling
I have a surprise for dinner
tonight." He then blindfolded me
and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as he was
about to
remove my blindfold, the
telephone rang. He made me
promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned
and went to answer the call. The baked
beans I had consumed were still
affecting me and the pressure
was becoming most unbearable, so
while my husband was out of
the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight
to one leg and let one go. It was
not only loud, but it smelled like a
fertilizer truck running over a
skunk in
front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from my lap
and fanned the air around me vigorously.
Then, shifting to the other
cheek, I ripped off three more.
The stink was
worse than stinking cabbage. Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the
conversation in the other room,
I went on like this for another
few minutes.
The pleasure was indescribable.
When eventually the telephone farewells signaled the end of my freedom,
I quickly fanned the air a few
more
times with my napkin, placed it
on my lap and folded my hands back on it
feeling very relieved and pleased with myself. My face
must have been the
picture of innocence when my
husband returned, apologizing for taking so long.
He asked me if I had peeped
through the blindfold, and I assured him I
had not. At this point, he
removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests
seated around the table
chorused: "Happy Birthday!"!! I
nearly died!!!

thanks. Merry christmas

@lilkech. At least you got my intention.

read this little paragraph of His biography:
At dis time yrs ago. A husband & a heavily pregnant wife wr searching 4 a place 2 deliver their baby. The night was cold. The people were unfriendly. Noise was strong. Doctors were either on strike or on holiday. Hotels were crowded. Carriages were expensive. Above the 'king' or 'devil' and his SSS were after them. But the baby had a job to do. To disgrace His enemies they found a manger where horses and other gentle animals were present. The shepherds also honoured the invitation of His christianing. No satan, no witch, no subsidy, no inflation, no black out, no Boko haram, no strike, no HIV, no, (though they had d map in the tip of their fingers) could stop Him. Mtcheew Olodo people. One funny thing is that all d king's hired killers, kidnappers, Boko haram, militants, air force whatever no, SSS, policemen, , bowed to Him to d extend of presently him their precious properties (wc they had stolen or collected through bribes) or may be called gifts. To crown it all, the stars sef no sleep. Meaning d geographical surroundings were at alert. What more do we need in a delivery. Welcome Jesus. Happy birthday. Merry christmas to u all esp Nigerians.

A farmer ordered a high tech milking machine.
Since the equipment arrived when his wife was out of
town, he decided to test it on himself first.
So he inserted his manhood into the instrument and
turned on the switch and everything else was
automatic. Soon he realised the equipment provided him wt
much more pleasure than his wife did.
When the fun was over, he quickly realised he
couldn't remove the equipment from his member.
He read the manual but didnt find any useful
information on how to disengage himself. He tried every button on the instrument but no success.
Finally, he decided to call the supplier customer
service hot line.
Hello I just bought a milking machine from ur
company. It works fantastic but how do I remove it
from the cow's udder. Dont worry replied the customer service rep. The
machine will release automatically when it collects
five litres.

Yaradua's moaner,shit packer,lended dead crier,baby sitter,devil advocate,, but oh,, has been SACKED

Yaradua's moaner,shit packer,lended dead crier,baby sitter,devil advocate,, but oh,, has been SACKED

Mjtwmjptmjpt

Supriseeeee3z

You know the topic.
YESTERDAY SOME GUNMEN SHOT AT TOGO TEAM.
FIFA COMPLAINS WITH NOISE FROM FANS IN STADIUM.
AND MORE,
Is these good for Africa?DISCUSS

Sorry i mean TEAM not TERM.thanks

I dont wish i happens to term nigeria.they are our best for NOW

Thanks vampire 5

NEWS:TOGO TERM WERE ATTACKED BY GUN MEN.
What do you think

We dont need to bully.the best teams will win

Thanks algerian and egyptian men.world cup would be great expecialy our first match with  argentina.they will suffer a great deal.semifinal is our goal,the cup is our wish.AMEN

We will win.am sure of it.we have the players