₦airaland Forum

samblaze:
Not responding joor.

Same here... Seems not to be working.

YES

Just in case... You know the rest ; -)

Anyway, Happy Birthday to me and my BD mates star (38), Atana , dejavou(30 ), TAILODUL(39 ),
barnaby04 , hauwabd , Youngavo(38),
stanlon40 (35 ), VENUSS, ochukoeja (25 ),
segxes23 (23), brabus, Melikam (55 ), ayo2009ice
(30), lizybos , lastina (31), Gudugbem (29 ), Ariyke,
Electronzeez , Highbe( 23), RICHBOI2 (55), tobnical
(32 ), billionsam ( 26), Omoswags (25), evvyking
(30 ), ojsamuel , audigier (23 ), obaflex( 30),
drizzydrag (27), uwherin(45 ), MikelMerry( 21),
austinemike , priscillawill( 19),
emmanuelpeace1(19 ), 30ammy (20 ), pathoma ,
nonnysilva( 25), base83 , ytnatureboy ,
dougy2 ( 27), abbyglow2012 (33), itzhibekay,
yeloyhemzy (22), udison (18 ), itsmreldorado(31 ),
umoeyenisim , hassal2004 , yisakolo(31 ),
sapphiref , kolawole97 (18 ), Divy001 (23 ),
maxivinsly05 (25 ), Fabulousoshi97 ( 18), adexbash,
Femi2Ranking , kiz1to71 ( 22), memud001 (23 ),
Mykemore(28), Jennycute (28 ), HeyNaijaF,
sirelexzy (17 ), emmytune(23 ), Shafiushafzy

luvlyoracle:
Any hope for those in metallurgical and material engineering?

Plenty hopes bro... Met & Mats Eng'g is the most diverse eng'g courses among all d eng'g courses. You can get them in most of the industries like oil and gas sector (as corrosion engr, welding engr, materials engr, & so forth), automobile industry, mining, metal production, ceramics industry, plastic, construction, power sector, and also Govt parastatals (like under minister of mine and steel, works). The main thing is just to show yourself worthy, and employers will seek your services.

Beesluv:
Good
But, some are not challenges
Why including 'his' when the topic reads 'ladies



Conclusion: Confused thread

I include HIS to show how Male co-workers seems to always have their way compare to ladies.

Conclusion: Convinced thread

Beesluv:
Good
But, some are not challenges
Why including 'his' when the topic reads 'ladies



Conclusion: Confused thread

I include HIS to show how Male co-workers seems to always have their way compare to ladies.

Conclusion: Convinced thread

We all seek for changes in this nation buh yet we seems not to see other parties apart from PDP & APC when we look at the list... The question is, are others not human being or they are not just worth considering because of their lack of fame?

How the company views its employees.

(HE VS SHE)

1.The family picture is on HIS desk.
Ah, a solid, responsible family man.
The family picture is on HER desk.
Umm, her family will come before her career.

2. HIS desk is cluttered.
He's obviously a hard worker and a busy man.
HER desk is cluttered.
She's obviously a disorganised scatterbrain

3. HE is talking with his co-workers.
He must be discussing the latest deal
SHE is talking with her co-workers.
She must be gossiping.

4. HE's not at his desk.
He must be at a meeting.
SHE's not at her desk.
She must be in the ladies' room.

5. HE's not in the office.
He's meeting with customers.
SHE's not in the office.
She must be out shopping.

6. HE's having lunch with the boss.
He's on his way up.
SHE's having lunch with the boss.
They must be having an affair.

7. The boss criticised HIM.
He'll improve his performance.
The boss criticized HER.
She'll be very upset.

8. HE got an unfair deal.
Did he get angry?
SHE got an unfair deal.
Did she cry?

9. HE's getting married.
He'll get more settled.
SHE is getting married.
She'll get pregnant and leave.

10. HE's having a baby.
He'll need a raise.
SHE's having a baby.
She'll cost the company money in maternity
benefits.

11. HE's going on a business trip.
It's good for his career.
SHE's going on a business trip.
What does her husband say?

12. HE's leaving for a better job.
He knows how to recognise a good
opportunity.
SHE's leaving for a better job.
Women are not dependable.

"You must choose to participate in one award
pool. There are 6 regional pools on the basis of
geo-political zone as identified by market in
which you want to do business"

I dont understand dat statement. Can u pls help me elucidate ant dat word "Pool"?

Following...

funny and good to go with...

Count your blessings,
Instagram them one by one...
Oh yes that’s the new saying
now. We Nigerians like to show
off, and instagram was made for our
lifestyle. If you still don’t have an
Instagram account you missing a
lot. Infact you’re most likely to be lost
in this post, so go download and
signup on instagram . 
Here are The 10 Types of Nigerians
you find on Instagram:
1. Team Kfb –
These are the most annoying group
of people on Instagram, they post kfb
on almost every post. Well for those
that don’t know what kfb means, it
means you’re not on Instagram, go
sign up and find out what it means
lol. Begging for a follow after every
comment or post you see is rude and
not polite, he will follow you if he/
she wants too. I saw people posting
kfb on Beyoncé Instagram page ,
Beyoncé doesn’t even follow Jay z so
why will she follow you.How do I
know this, check her Instagram page,
she has 19 million followers and the
babe doesn’t give a shit about
following anybody(following zero).
.
.
2. Filter Lords-
I sometimes use filters when
necessary but there are this group of
people that can’t just do without
filter on any pictures they post, I call
them the Instagram Dencia(Her royal
majesty of skin tonning,nah that
sound too nice, bleaching queen I
mean).You see the Dolapo,a.k.a
walking shadow, your old secondary
school crush all of a sudden looking
so light skin on Instagram, and you
start wondering isn’t that Dolapo omo
Iya alamala ?

3. The Selfie Babe-
It’s not only girls nowadays that
takes selfies infront of a mirror even
boys do also,yeah even me
sometimes. All this group of people
do on Instagram is post selfies of
themselves,mostly in front of a
mirror ,then add hashtags like
#selfie#meAlone#mirrorselfie etc.

4.Mr “like all pictures”-
This group of people are mostly guys,
they don’t post or comment that
often, all they do is like any picture
posted as if they’re been paid to do
so.You check your news feed are you
see Obinna liked 90 pictures(20
seconds ago), nna when will Oga
Obinna post his own pictures now?.

5. The Comedian-
The chief obi class of people, this
group of people are the ones that
truly make Instagram all way fun,
they’re always posting short funny
videos that would make you laugh
your ass off. If you don’t have the
likes of chief obi, funnyAfrica
pics, iamdulo , oluwakaponeski , crazeclown
, foxy p etc on your instagram list
then you’re missing out a lot of
laughter. They are the ones that
have gotten fame and cash through
Instagram, gone are those days when
you have to be seen on TV to be
popular, these days just post funny
videos ,get more followers are you
can sign autograph on beautiful
excited female fan’s boobs lol.

6.Mr.”Na me gym pass ”-
He his always in the gym, posting
pictures of his “8 packs”.You wonder
if he got a day time job
.
7.The fashionista-
#floraljumpsuit
#sundayRedandWhiteAnkara
#iroAndBuba #newlook,these are the
kind of hashtags you see on their
daily fashion post. It’s always about
the cloth they wore on Monday or
the iro and buba they wore to
church last Sunday. They have the
most colorful Instagram page,’cos it’s
always about the right color worn.I
like this group sha !

8. The Hashtag Assassins-
The Chuck Norris and James Bond of
hashtags. Let me first confess, I was
also a member till I understood what
hashtags are meant for. Hashtags are
used so Instagram search engines
can find and categorize pictures with
same tags.For instance, if you type
#puffpuff in one of your pictures,
any user anywhere in the world
looking for “puffpuff” can find your
picture. How can someone type an
hashtag looking like a page from
Edet and Simbi English Textbook and
expect that another user somewhere
to find his picture . Biko don’t string
too many words together with a
single hashtag

9.The Instagram Columbus-
Today she is posting a picture of
herself with burj khalifa in the
background ,hashtag
#Indubaichilling,tomorrow another
picture of her with the london
bridge ,next she’s posing with
the colosseum in Italy.You start
getting jealous and wondering if
she’s a pilot or an air hostess,’cos
where does such money for that kind
of travel falls from?

10.Madam Multiple Photos(MMP) –
This group is dominated by mostly
girls ,I find them really annoying.
You mirror the same single image in
2 or four squares using those insta
apps, Girl did you missed the Physics
class on “reflection” in your High
school??
So which group do you belong too?

Omero:
Yea very gud idea, once managed a bottling company. Was very tasking and challenging working with modern and gigantic machines. All d very best Sir!

Can u pls share with me some of d experience u had wen u were managing a bottling company. Am a serving Corper and will get to manage a water-bottling somewhere in FCT wen done. So, I will like to gather an information regarding to that bfr time. thanks in anticipation. I've sent u an email.

NL, please how can I delete a post (mine) frm nairaland after posting it.

Tonyosas101: A shade that can see through clothes,,,, Asin 'one will be able to see a nun naked body while she's fully dressed

Na u o suffer am... except is d one dat can detect weda d person is a Virgin or not, wen person enter dere last and how many ppl has enter, and can also measure d diameter (i.e how tight or wide it is)

Extrnal Wall tiles dat can used sunlight and air as a form of energy to give electricity like solar panel dat uses only sunlight... Am still making research on it. Be expecting it from my company *wink*

Am a batch B Corper serving in Federal Staff Secondary School, Adewale Estate.... Call me on 08060466910 if u need home tutor or if u know someone dat need. Am an engineer by profession.

semasir: Yea ooooo..... OBS crew..... I'm relocated to Rivers now and where is your PPA?

relocated to kwara, hoping to get my ppa today bcozz dey ask me to come back today after reporting on Monday

semasir: #TeamZamfara. Relocated to Rivers from Zamfara too but from Lagos. Is there anyone with an idea of a favorable place to serve?..... what a camp in Zamfara!

Now I know u... OBS crew... Hall 2... If u dont know me, am Idris, Rimsy friend (Bunk mate) near Ustaz dat psycho guy...

semasir: #TeamZamfara. Relocated to Rivers from Zamfara too but from Lagos. Is there anyone with an idea of a favorable place to serve?..... what a camp in Zamfara!

Which hall and platoon were u? I was in platoon 1 and hall 2...

xpensiv05: University of ilorin..... So many place 2serve dere

Thanks! Hope dey wont reject me if incase d NYSC posting officer agree to post me dere?

Initially posted to Zamfara, buh relocated to Kwara... Am in my house (FCT) chilling till Monday bfr I will report... Pls, is there anybody in d house dat knows abt kwara and favourable place for PPA? help out pls...

xrazzy: Welcome to kwara state! It's surely good here. Name's Badmus, finished from ABU, Zaria, and posted to kwara state, MY STATE OF ORIGIN where i presently reside. Y'all gonna have fun!

Hey bro, I just got my relocated letter frm Zamfara now and am been relocated to kwara. So, pls how much does kwara pay as their state allowance and where is will suggest for a Corper to do his PPA if he has d opportunity to influence it. I finished frm ABU as well. Met and Mats Eng'g.

computerboy: Dear Sir,
APPLICATION FOR EMPLOYMENT
I refer to the recent death of the accountant at your office and
hereby apply for the job as a replacement of the dead accountant.
Each time i apply for employment a get a reply that there is no
vacancy but in this case, i have caught you red handed and you
have no excuse because while i was in my home town for holidays i
heard the good news about his death so i quickly back to attend
his funeral to be sur that he truly dead before applying.
Attached to my letter is a copy of my CV and his Obituary as
proof of vacancy.
You cant swerve me this time, give me the job.
Thank you.
Yours Faithfully
Akpos

... U no go kill us with laf

timilehing: Where 2 or 3 gathered, fear Ebola outbreak. Am outta here

Am coming with u

YoungForever: Nice camp...but dry place...

That's good to hear... Buh d dryness is not good for me. Anyway, see u 2moro

I was posted to Zamfara as well... leaving Abuja for camp on Tuesday... I cant wait to redeploy back to FCT

naijamd: Can you supply to Benin city, Edo state? How much per tonne and who bears the cost of transportation

I can supply u all d way from Kogi state... I bears the cost of transportation since ot is incorporated in d price per tonne of d maize...

At last.... What heart warming news for the FCE students... Nice one from the new MOE Ibrahim Shekarau..

vanessaphilip: @ zubb,they asked me to be lecturing in their skul,never knew corpers are posted to polythenic to teach

How much do they pay you monthly and were u given an accommodation or u av to get for yourself?