₦airaland Forum

Chaiii sai baba dun spoil naija finish. Back then, everywhere u go na so so show advert u go dey see. But right now, people never chop belle full na money for show go cum dey
It shall never be well with those that brought this calamity. May Amadioha and Sango visit d families of those that brought this calamity of govt

Samueltemi337:
quote me with your original moniker


scared mf

U are quoting d fake drug seller

ImaIma1:
You didn't give any examples. But it's ok. It won't matter anyway.

I told u to go to page 1 or 2 and see where I cited an example of what happened in my former place of work. Either u hv read it and decided to look away as usual which is normal with women whenever something is not favouring them

Mariangeles:
Please, do yourself and the world a favour; do not marry any woman.
Please.

We are not talking about marriage here young lady.

ImaIma1:
This here is the reason why domestic violence can not be eradicated, because of men with such mindset.

U guys never told yourself d truth, d earlier u say d truth d better for d society.

ImaIma1:
Explain. Give examples.

Read from page 1 or 2 and see where I cited an example

ImaIma1:
But normal woman will just wake up and start pushing her husband to the wall right?

Men we have these days are perfect. They don't commit offences.

Domestic Violence are majorly caused by women, d earlier u ladies tell yourselves d truth for u all.

ImaIma1:
And men don't want to eat their cake and have it right? As I said guys are innocent. You people don't have any blame. The women are the cause of the world's problems.

Domestic Violence yes, women are d major cause

Mindlog:
And you think we don't have such men in abundance?

You think we don't have men and women whose personality disorders thrive on inflicting either physical and emotional pain or both on others?

As you have said you have volunteered, working a NGO, do also make effort to volunteer in a psychiatric facility.

Actually d nature of what I do enables me to mingle with people from all sexs.
Let me tell u a bit of how it DM starts.
Women likes to manipulate weaklings, and when such manipulations stops working for her, that's when issues start springing up, and some men does not hv tolerance to handle it. Mostly somebody like me.

TONYE001:
In truth, there are wives like this and this is bad, very bad, in fact. Simply, they lack wisdom and should be urged to study their Bibles closely.

But please, can I ask a question? Are there men that would refuse to help their wives in the kitchen but would hastily cook for their girlfriends (what they call "side chicks" ) ? Are there men that would not wash their wives' clothes but would wash their girlfriends' clothes just because of sex? Of course, there are!

You see? It goes both ways.

Honestly, we have to learn to look at this issue without gender bias. Both genders have their faults and we must learn to address these faults together.

But how many people are really talking about it? Rather society would laugh at d man, simply bcs he is a man

ImaIma1:
People like that are set in their thinking. They cannot see beyond their own narrow-minded thinking.

But you cannot blame him. It was how he was brought up to view women and the relationship between men and women. He has to make a conscious effort to get enlightenment.

It was how women made d society to be.
Back then, every young man dreams of having his own family, every woman dreams of coming to another family.
Back then, women united so many families that a brother would like to marry from d family of sister inlaw.
DM was less then, Love was more then, understanding was more then but this day, women want to eat their cake and still hv it.

ImaIma1:
Noooo there are no stupid or idiotic men. They are all right and guiltless. The woman is the problem.

When it comes to DV, the woman is to blame completely as per she was created to be the cause while the man is so innocent, above reproach that he has no other choice than to beat her...as per the beating that she deserves.

The stories you have heard are not basis for conclusion. Have you heard other stories from other people? But you choose to be right on your own. Please don't get married with this kind of pne way thinking. It will end in divorce.

I still maintain my stand that some women deserves better beating.
I never chose to be right on my own, d fact still remains that women are d major cause of DV. Normal man can not just wake up in d morning and start beating his wife, many women pushed their husband's to d wall. It's only an abnormal man that just lay his hands on how wife. Women we hv this days are something else

TONYE001:
The bolded is a costly generalization. When people generalize, they tend to do so in narratives that support their arguments. I can also say that "that husband that refused to help his wife in the kitchen would gladly cook for the young girl he cheats with because of sex..."..see?? Generalizations have no facts so I like to stay away from them.

There are women that would place their pastors over their husbands just as there are men that would place their girlfriends over there wives. But there are good women too, and good men.

I do not know what causes 80% of domestic violence. If I see a published research article with this report, I'd appreciate the information and keep it. However, I know that men and women are both responsible for DM and until we talk to BOTH men and women, DV would go nowhere.

Sir TONY that's just, d same tired woman would go to night virgil but can't go to d kitchen.
D same tired woman would be set for night prayer but can't go to d kitchen

JONNYSPUTE:
.... Hehehe. As Una no wan call a spade what it is. Let's be dealing with it.

Op what do you have to say about this?
Haven't you also noticed how trying to correct even your own child thesedays is seen as child abuse?

Even sending kids for little errands theses days is called child slavery.

What do you ve to say about women battering their house maids? While their foolish husband's keep mute?

Let's all revive the family values where everybody knows his or her roles.

Like you keep saying that if both couples comes back late from work that the husband is not supposed to request for food from the wife because she is also tired.Who made such rule? Do you think every family has the same dynamics?

Can we also say that because she works,she is not supposed to ask the husband for financial assistance?

Na Una dey put rules without balancing it.

I know that some men are evil and can get provoked without any offence been committed by their wives. The question is what percentage?

Op try settling a marriage dispute and find out things by urself and you will see that most times it's a very little thing that causes all this domestic violence.

So many women that you see talking back at husband's calls their pastors daddy and and even see nothing wrong in submitting to his rules and regulations but turns to tiger in their matrimonial homes.

When we are ready to say the truth then we all will know that we are ready but for now let's keep blaming the economy and society.
@TONYE001

I'm happy that somebody is in alignment with me. A woman would batter her maid and everybody will look away.
A woman would worship her pastor and causes her husband, nobody would say anything
A woman would bring division btw brothers and nobody would call for her head.
We aren't ready for change, until then let's all deal with it.
My time with an NGO on domestic violence really opened my eyes wide about women

Finally d fake drug seller dun change moniker

Vision101:
Food don done for ladies that hate or failed in marriage. Oya come and attack.

Exactly, they would never say d cause of the abuse, they will never say d role they played before d abuse
U won't see them telling d truth, always playing d victim card

Kobojunkie:
So why return the "bride price"? He suppose to pay for damages inflicted on your body and psyche abeg.

U hv started again, why won't she return d bride price?

Lets all wait for d autopsy before hanging d man but emption wont allow us see it that way

TONYE001:
Oh...

What the lady did was wrong and I'm sure a trained pharmacist would prefer reporting the incident to the supervisor/boss and an appropriate discipline action would be taken. If the lady has been disrespectful repeatedly and it's so bad that it interferes with business, I'm sure her employer would consider disengaging her.

It's not all about reporting her to d boss, this is what u get in our modern society.
These are d types of ladies u see in our modern society.
D pharmacist being a gentle and cool guy was annoyed within him but somebody like me would hv treated it in my own way.
With all due respect sir, women of this generation feels that once they acted stupidly and nobody cautioned them, it would automatically become part of them.
Women hv to be put in their position that's one of d way domestic violence could be curtailed

TONYE001:
Well, from the research I did (cited in the article), it's actually getting worse now and this is understandable.

Before now, women easily acted their roles according to the African society/culture. Now, things are different. Women have to do more now. Because of the economy, women have to work. We now have education and women have to pursue their aspirations, just like men. So, they are overwhelmed. Imagine a bank manager returning home at 6/7pm and being expected by the husband to hurry to the kitchen and prepare dinner. Since women are unable to meet all these impossible expectations (without the help of their husbands), they are branded disloyal and in some instances, arguments from this scenario may amount to violence.

My point is, men should understand that we are no longer in the old days. This idea of the-wife-must-cook-and-do-the-chores must be thrown away. Men should be willing and eager to fold their sleeves and help out. Their wives are as tired as they are in the evenings when they return from their various places of work. This shouldn't be hard to understand.

Thank Jah that u did d research by yourself and that was why I didn't stress myself by replying to that chairman.
I grew with elderly people both elderly women and men. Back then, if u don't see me in d house just go to one grandma or grandpa house in d kindred and u would see me.
I learnt a lot, women of d oldies knew d heart of their husband's. And husband's knew what their women cherished.
Violence will continue to multiply in our society on daily bases, when u think that u hv seen it all, that's when another version of DM would spring up.
I personally, volunteered with an NGO on Domestic violence and child abuse (without pay, Infact I was using my personal data and system to do some office work).
With all due respect sir, some women deserves beating, let's not attach emotion to it

TONYE001:
But again, let's make something clear.

No one has any right to hit another. If the pharmacist had hit the attendant, or using your analogy, if the husband hits his wife, the wife can pursue the case in the court of law and he'd find himself behind bars. This is what happens when we are unable to control our emotions. After years of struggle, after years of education, hustling, and all, we make a little mistake that'd send us to prison for the rest of our lives! And guess what? the wife (and the children) would move on with their lives.

In functional societies, people think twice before they do stuffs like this...and if they assault their spouse eventually, they'd go in for it. In more extreme societies, if they kill their spouse, they may be sent to death. Even here, an angry mob may kill the husband (or wife, whoever did the act) before the police gets hold of him/her.

So, the question is, is it really worth it? If we could interview those that are behind bars now or dead because they assaulted their spouses, what would you think their responses would be? Surely, many would act differently if given a second chance.

Again, if the spouse you loved so much that you decided to spend the rest of your life with him/her offends you continuously and you feel you can't take it any more, call it quits! Walk away and go find joy elsewhere. This remains the best thing to do. If you allow your emotions to act ahead of your reasoning, you may end up doing stuffs you'd regret forever.

This is the main message of this article.

If I were to go back to school, I would loved to be tutored by u.
Back to d issue on ground, but sir, u never said anything on d said sales attendant that silently insulted d pharmacist?
Sir, u never bordered to asked if it was her first time or if it was her attitude?

TONYE001:
Good morning, bro.

I refer you to the first two paragraphs of the article. You'd see that I made no conclusions there. This article is not about the man. In fact, it is not about the lady too. It is about DM. Her death made this stirred this discussion online and offline. A number of fora are talking about DM. Over here, my colleagues and friends are also talking about DM.

For now, testimonies about the DM the lady suffered are all over the internet, from her friends and family. The man is yet to deny any of these. While I think this is likely to be true, I'd continue to wait for a definitive report.

Alright, can we all wait for d autopsy result before hanging d man?
I just narrated a story of where I worked before sometime ago, could u read and let's discuss on that, that's one of d causes of domestic violence. I won't say that I know d causes of DV, but I hv seen d causes

JONNYSPUTE:
.....The truth is bitter but it is the only thing that can save us all from this issue.

Let's keep covering it and see how it goes.

Obident is better than sacrifice. What do we have now? Woke people call it slavery and still want things to remain normal.

U nailed it, truth is bitter, we all want to eat d cake and still hv it, which is not done anywhere.
Something happened at a pharmacy that I worked with sometime ago.
D pharmacy normally closes by 9 but doors are being locked by 8:45, for d attendants to tidy up d days activities.
They employed a new pharmacists (though without much experience), so when d pharmacist wanted to go which is normal thing all over for pharmacist to leave before d whole attendants.
Could u believe d silent insult from one of d sales attendant. "that pharmacist can't leave until they reconciled their excess money, that he was d one that delayed them" d pharmacist asked politely that (bcs he was one cool and gentle guy) he was never d one that delayed them, they didn't wanted to open d door for d poor pharmacist to go.
Immediately I got hold of what happened, I opened d door and locked all of them inside and stayed outside. It was when they finished that they didn't see key, they called and pleaded that I should unlock for them to go. Why they pleaded they knew that my head no too correct for women matter.
So in this scenario, let's assume d pharmacist was the husband d sales attendant was d wife, what would u do in such situation?
Mind u, a Pharmacist on duty is d head of that pharmacy

TONYE001:
I tried to make him see things differently but I couldn't.

Maybe he'd have a rethink sometime. I hope it won't be too late.

Morning brotherly, I expected questions regards to d death of that lady but to my utmost surprise, nobody is asking those questions.
People are after hanging d man without seen d result. When we attach so much emotion to things that's when we will forget to ask d necessary questions,

ccffwx:
You will end up like Osinachi's husband. Coward!

NIGERiANS ARE TOO EmOTIONAL, U GUYS HV NEvER ASKED SOME QUESTIONS THAT LED TO HER DEATH. LETS WSIT FOR D AUToPSY BEFORE HANGING D MAN.
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A FATHER TO INSTIGATE CHILDREN AGAiNST THEIR MOTHER OR D OTHER WAY ROUND?

ImaIma1:
From your comments men are saints, and are only pushed to the wall by women. They are completely blameless in all their dealings and can never be wrong. Any wrong in them is caused by the woman. So they have to beat the woman because they are pushed. Ok I see your point.

When it comes to DV, women are simply d cause, that's d fact. I would hv narrated stories upon stories but I won't go their bcs this is not why we are here.
Yes I know some stupid men in boys skin that can't reason at all.
Yes I know some men that are not worthy to be called men at all.
Yes I know some idiotic men in boys skin that are not suppose to associate with human beings.
But domestic violence are being caused by women and d earlier women start knowing that they are d cause d better for them

Kobojunkie:
Stop rambling abeg!

I expected this comment from u

TONYE001:
I see you would not stop blaming women for DV.

No wahala.

D earlier women start telling themselves d truth d easier to eradicate DV but species of women we hv this days are not ready to hear d truth.
A man can not just wake up and lay his hands on a woman without d woman pushing d man to d wall, mind u not all men can be allowed to be pushed to d wall before fighting back. If a woman want peace she should bring d peace

Bekind123:
They should also look into girlchild inheritance of father's property, even if it's half of what is given to a boy child.

Mak una cum see one of d people causing domestic violence.

Iyaebe:
Just marry the right man and you’ll never experience rubbish in marriage, money shouldn’t be a determinant factor, your happiness should.Another secret is that ladies should stop hiding their ugly side so as to be chosen, flaunt your weaknesses and let who wants to be with you stick.

First time of making a point bcs all your comments are pointless and stupid

TONYE001:
Which you have a published source to back your assertion. The world is too big to arrive at a conclusion based on your experience. I have my own experiences and I'm sure others do. Only verifiable claims can be believed.

Someone out there has seen a lot of terrible males too. Someone out there has seen a drunkard for a husband, a cultist or a serial adulterer. Your experiences are not exclusive.

U see this DV, this shit aren't going anytime soon, Infact it has come to stay. Back then, women were home builders, peacemakers, unity, but right now, they are home breakers and most of d disunity in homes are being caused by them.

Mindlog:
Same you hyperventilating, would urinate in your boxers when a cadet in the Nigerian Defense Academy confront you.. na for woman matter your body dey hot.

That you grew up seeing females in your family being beaten up by the men does not make it right.

One thing about me is that I don't make mouth on a faceless forum, so I won't go their. We'll I gat no one, so say something else.
Some daughters of eve deserves better beating, marriageable women were last seen late 1990s and early 2000s. U see from 2005 down d Lane are all rubbish