This is just me.

iamdotune:
I don't see anything wrong, I use the left hand for almost everything it's just like using the right hand, it's very nice especially when brushing your tooth it feels more comfortable to use than the right hand, the only thing I use my right hand for is to write and eat

And yeah.. every left handed person I know are usually intelligent

AMEN

nony43:
My humble Prayers to us all on NL is that for God to bless us enough to build and high interior decorators, Amen

What about traditional wedding? Is it only church wedding?

Lets look at it this way:
Your personal things come first (I am citing example of my own wedding expenses)
Traditional wear for husband and wife (lace and aso oke - just gele, ipele, cap, veil, hand fan, shoe and bag for bride and sewing) - 35,000
Eru iyawo (bought the box and the items myself, sebi na me get am 20,000
Food and drinks (rice, semo, amala, meat, fish, vegetable, bottle water, bottle coke - small, alcoholic drinks and wine) budgeted for 50people but more than 100 came and were all satisfied and even had takeaway - my paramount concern. - 120k
Chairs and tables - 5000
Venue - our living room - so no decor
Cake - very beautiful big cake - 10,000
Souvenirs - Courtesy of my siblings and mum
Photograph/Album - A friend (11,000)
Ring - steel - complete set - 7,000

Church Wedding
No gown - Just made a very beautiful skirt and blouse lace with the same gele and ipele i used of trad, same my hubby - 6,000
Paid 7,000 (church expenses)
Paid registry for marriage licence - 10,000
Bought drinks for thanksgiving and for priests and few parishioners present (it was a weekday) - 5,000
Collected certificate in the church.
Hosted few family members that came - including key family members - father, mother, uncles, aunties and siblings) - 20,000
Shikena.

No money to spend unnecessarily - we go chop after wedding na. Now we are waxing stronger and growing bigger.

Key Note: Don't try to please anybody.

Congrats dear.

shelter4luving:
Happy sunday lovely people. Pls your suggestions/ advice is welcome here.

Am getting married. The days of heart break and all that are over. It's time to smile, love and trust again.
He's been my best friend for a long time. We shared all our secrets with each other. He finally asked me to marry him and I said yes.

Our budget for white wedding is 250k. We want a small wedding besides things are difficult now and he's not financially buoyant now , but I love him like that.

These is the list I came up with :

1. Wedding gown & groom suit -- 15k
I will rent my gown
2. Shoes (bride & groom) - 5k
3. Wedding ring - 2k
We'll buy more better one later
4. Bridal hair/make up - 3k
I don't need a make up artists. Most people already know I look more beautiful without too much painting.
5. Cake (2 tiers of cake) 15k
I know how to bake so na weh weh. Noone can cheat me on that.
6. Reception venue (church premises) tables, canopies, decoration - 25k
7. Photograph (coverage, one photo book, pre wedding) 28k.
We are taking 5 pics for pre wedding in a very standard studio. That will be #500 multiply by 5
8. MC. We'll look for a friend maybe from youth department in church. - 5k
9. Souvenirs - 20k.
10. Food(fried rice, jollof rice, semo, fish) 70k
11. Drinks (soft drinks and 15 bags of sachet water? 25k.

I think everything above is 200k already.


These are the things I can remember. Pls any suggestions or advice? If your suggestions will reduce my above budget, pls its very welcome
Any wedding planner in the House? Pls help me adjust my list above.

Thanks

Let me suggest they get ring of about 7-10,000 Naira (steel) its durable. they can get gold when they are financially buoyant.

Negotiate:
15k may not be enough for gown and suit.
Let's put that at 20.

If you can, please get good rings. Get gold. It's going to be one of the main things because it stays on after everything has ended. 30 - 40k should do, and you won't bother again. Buy from abokis. It's cheap.

Your decoration seems high. If you're using your church, just appreciate the welfare unit with a crate of malt and 5k in an envelope.

Budget #150/person for souvenir. Buy in bulk.

What about plates for serving? Are you renting extra seats?

nurey:
Always sanitary pad still sell for 250 naira nah. Which one be 500naira

For where? It should be between 350-450 naira

nnamdiosu:



First of all..I havent heard your wife's side of the story. So I won't totally blame her. In all matters I know there are always two sides to a coin.


Now from the little I have read I can see you and your wife are two honest loving people trying their best in this union. And that's the key to a lasting marriage.

1. First ensure you carefully filter the suggestions that people will give here (including mine). Be wise. Nl is full of sadistic and occultic folkes.

2. People are different. They also apologise in different ways. Now I don't know ur wife but you will be in the best shoe to know. Some of my friends outrightly apologise. Others come near me and indirectly apologise. Some eben indirectly blame me jokingly and tell me they've forgiven me! Even wen its clear to a blind man that they were annoyed. You have your own way. I have my own way. She has her own way.

Truth is an apology is not out of place. Maturity demands that one should apologise for a wrong act...but wisdom accepts that no two people are the same. Does she show an apology in some other way? If yes...then accept while still trying to show her why a spoken apology is more ideal. If no.....then it is well.

3. To be frank...it is very very wrong for a wife to disobey her husband. In that aspect she was 100 % wrong. Very wrong. But maturity and compromise is needed in marriage in all matters. Since you've talked to her and she doesn't want to listen. Call her and ask her y indeed she really disobeys and uses the product. If the reason isn't holding water....ask her if she will prefer cooking separate pots of food for u too. At least that will help solve the problem. She has her way..u have your way.

3. I admire your patience and love for her. I felt your pain. But now...put aside that pain....and pick understanding and love. Truth is, ideally in all ramifications, she is wrong. But let's forget about that. Try the steps I gave.. Esp the frank talk with her. Find that right time when she is in that emotional state of mind (after sex? Or buying her a gift), and tell/ ask her y she is disobeying u.
Lastly commit it into the hands of God. Only God can help u direct a woman. Because they are the last thing he created, very mysterious, very surprising yet very lovable and emotional.

And madam if and if I say (cos I know there are different sides to a story) what Oga said is true...then remember that only a foolish woman plucks her home down with her own hand. I've seen good marriages break down for issues less than this. Yours will not be so in Jesus name. Amen.

I admire your wisdom sir/ma.

gucciplay:
Hi everyone i sold my 2 plots of lands last year to build a house . so the issue now is that my 4 tenants rent have expired since last month. my junior brother informed them there house rent have expired the told him that i will have to give them 3 free months. that is what Nigeria law said unless i should them Quit Notice .It's very sad that a house i build with my hard earn money somebody will be telling me that he will live in my house for free. I want to know which step i have to take

I think the 3months is for those that are given quit notice. So you give a quit notice with AT LEAST 3months grace. You can give them quit notice if they want to frustrate you but with AT LEAST 3months grace.

bodmas119:
My younger brother is living with us but my wife used to complaint to me he doesn't wash plates, pls how should I handle the matter peacefully coz am confused?

Maybe you should talk to your wife calmly and make her understand that your brother is a grown up man. Make her see that he is humble enough to assist with some house chores. Your brother sef try, if na some they will not even lift a pin in the house.

You are welcome sir. My regards to your beautiful queen and ATINUKE. I wish her safe delivery. Don't forget to tell us when the time comes. Also, If you can, try as much as possible to avoid society wedding, it will only save your and your wife to be some money and stress. The most important is your family's blessing and if your are a christian just go to church for blessing with your wife and FEW members of your family and witnesses and if a muslim, its very simple, just provide the necessary things for your nikkah and get reputable clerics to bless you and leave the rest to GOD. I did a parlour traditional wedding an just went to church with my husband and very few of our family members mainly our parents and siblings. We were blessed by both parents and priests and we got our certificate. WISH YOU ALL THE BEST.

suleiman16:



Thank you for ur advice, it will go a long way...

Good. But staying with your parents may not go down well with her. She may not complain but she may not like it either. I for a person like to be independent no matter what. It will give her more room to make her own decision, unlike when with her in-laws, she will be doing shy shy and will not be so free. Let her stay in your apartment and start building your own empire. Like I said earlier, be independent. Your family, your pride.

suleiman16:



Thank you for this weekend this wonderful advice, hopefully she would graduate before this year run out, I have an apartment she can stay, thou will like her to stay with my parent since I won't be around... My fear is just how she will cope with her final year n pregnancy...

Congrats OP. Many are really looking for that bundle of joy you and your fiance just got on a platter of gold. Mine was just like urs in the beginning. Be optimistic, prayerful and have faith. All things will fall in place. My advice - Try to be independent. Your family, your pride.

Can you please upload picture of the product and how do I get it here in Abeokuta?

Good one sir.

raydatluvs:
Everybody is saying let her go which is probably best,I just want to give you a flip side to salvage your love.
You see,my family is or was pretty much like what you are about having. my dad was the eldest and all his siblings took turns to live with us like you and my mum tried to understand. My point is I understand her fears,firstly its going to be a new marriage and when push comes to shove,you would take your siblings' side as she would be like the odd one. Its the natural thing to do unlike if its just two of you and they visit,she would feel a sense of entittlement.
That said ,I think she needs to be assured of her position when heads start to roll, that you would not put your siblings first, that you would support her when there is agrument and not stay on the fence like you say you do. She needs authority!! So bro,you have got work to do. Believe me,her reaction is normal.