^^^^^^^ web of frustration , i am not confused cuz i know what i want to do but want to know of other fresh and ideas as those i have tried arent working.

^^^^^^^^^^^^ nice 1,

@@@kpolli, no, after the period we actually dated, i havent given room for that to come to play.

haba@ smoooooth, u harsh ooo, in the last 10 years from when i dated him was when the other guys happened, i never even 30 yet,

what i simply asked for are ideas of how to get over him, i know thats what i have to do. but give examples, eg cutting off all contact with him, then what??

@@@@@khanye, loooooool ,  u no even serious,

@CH20H, i get your point,  i should sever all ties, abi?? but in doing that still pray to God,  i'm working on it,

@@kpolli, a friend told me that 4years ago, i didnt have the liver to do it,  besides, wetin wan happen when i arrest am for a week? when i no gree do the thing, he go use that as excuse.

God will direct me in His own perfect way for me,  ill do things to renew myself,

ok, i will do these things, i may not have been trying my bestest best, there is nothing to forgive him about, we are buddies. u wont believe when u hear us gisting( when the tension of the obvious isnt on board though).

i'm praying to God most of all about this. if it isnt meant to be then let Him take him off my life for good. so we can be comfortable as just friends.

i hope this year marks the end of this crazy spell,

@thoniaslim, i have tried that, i liked the other guys genuinely, but he managed to remain under my skin, i think i need deliverance, its either we end up together  or  God sends me someone who would totally wipe thoughts of him off my being.


i really really want to forget him and have tuned myself but it ain't working,


@@@C2H5OH, i have tried that over the years, it always seems to be working at first then it just comes all down on me, its not all simple, there were times i didnt talk to him for up to a year,

how do u advise that i allow myself get over him maybe i'm not doing the right stuff e.g meeting new people, going out to do new things and others to take my mind of it and ones that make me happy eg shopping


but at the end of the day, when i lie down to sleep (not every day though but too often for the word 'comfortable', i think of him.

@ kpolli and everybody, i know the right thing to do is to swallow my pride and tell him how i feel but i have done that several times and its resulted in nothing, obviously, i'm alone in this dilemma.

i have thought of how it might hurt when i get invites for important occassions in the future (assuming i end up with someone else), as @@@whitelexi pointed out, that is so true but what can i do when he wont budge??

i cant keep hurting myself with the silent rejection, i just want to get over him, i dont know why it didnt work out cuz i thought we were really compatible, we used to play alot, thats by the way now,

i just want a way forward cuz i know, after telling the next time (just this one time), my heart will not be able to take it anymore, i will definitely give it a shot though i must confess that the past silence has made me a bit timid, wont he be sick of knowing the truth over and over again,

or worse, wonder why i havent managed to let go of him all these many years??

Thank you all for the suggestions, He knows how i feel and since he won't do anything abt it, there is little else i can do, for me, the next guy has to be a great deal,

i have been praying seriously about it, He is in nigeria and i'm in london, that wont have been a problem though but i really want to get over him.

@@kpolli, i wish, life isnt that easy oo,

this isnt normal, is it? how can i have liked someone for almost 10years il talk to him but i know nothing will come out of it.

please, more ideas coming in.


thanks for the warm concerns.

He and I dated almost 10years ago, Yes, unbelievable, We broke up, I started seeing someone else and he wanted me back but I stuck with the at-the-time guy. When that relationship didn't work, i tried getting back with the first (lets call him 'x') but he was in a relationship, and then i started to see someone and he wanted me back,

So you all see, it was like an unpleasant game of hide and seek, we wanting each other when we were already seeing someone else.

after that (about three years ago), we hung out together and i, at this time, had started practicing celibacy and respecting my body and anyone who respects my choice. x and i saw a numbers of times but no sexual intimacy took place leaving us tense,

Now, the problem is whenever i try to date anyone, i size the guy to 'x' and now, i have ended up single and worry that i will be too heart broken when i hear that he is getting married, i don't know if he is dating anyone but he is well into that age of settling down so i guess it could be anytime.

i know and have come to realise that we cant have any other other kind of relationship asides being just friends but that is so difficult for me even though i am trying my best.

i always really liked him and he knows, he likes me too but i dont know what was amiss in the past. and just chose to ignore the reality, i want to get him off my thoughts totally, but dont want to rush into a relationship like i did in the past just to get over him.

sometimes, i forget all about him for days, even weeks then thoughts of him just manage to creep in from nowhere, i have been praying to God to deliver me from this mess as i recognise it is a big problem.

please for anyone who has been in this situation or anything like it or anyone and everyone who can advice, please write on, criticisms are welcome too.

these matters of the heart isnt at all for the faint-hearted oo,


thanks.

CHEAP ARTICO!!!! Hungry hyenas!!! lol

He and I dated almost 10years ago, Yes, unbelievable, We broke up, I started seeing someone else and he wanted me back but I stuck with the at-the-time guy. When that relationship didn't work, i tried getting back with the first (lets call him 'x') but he was in a relationship, and then i started to see someone and he wanted me back,

So you all see, it was like an unpleasant game of hide and seek, we wanting each other when we were already seeing someone else.

after that (about three years ago), we hung out together and i, at this time, had started practicing celibacy and respecting my body and anyone who respects my choice. x and i saw a numbers of times but no sexual intimacy took place leaving us tense,

Now, the problem is whenever i try to date anyone, i size the guy to 'x' and now, i have ended up single and worry that i will be too heart broken when i hear that he is getting married, i don't know if he is dating anyone but he is well into that age of settling down so i guess it could be anytime.

i know and have come to realise that we cant have any other other kind of relationship asides being just friends but that is so difficult for me even though i am trying my best.

i always really liked him and he knows, he likes me too but i dont know what was amiss in the past. and just chose to ignore the reality, i want to get him off my thoughts totally, but dont want to rush into a relationship like i did in the past just to get over him.

sometimes, i forget all about him for days, even weeks then thoughts of him just manage to creep in from nowhere, i have been praying to God to deliver me from this mess as i recognise it is a big problem.

please for anyone who has been in this situation or anything like it or anyone and everyone who can advice, please write on, criticisms are welcome too.

these matters of the heart isnt at all for the faint-hearted oo,


thanks.

He and I dated almost 10years ago,  Yes, unbelievable,  We broke up, I started seeing someone else and he wanted me back but I stuck with the at-the-time guy. When that relationship didn't work, i tried getting back with the first (lets call him 'x') but he was in a relationship,  and then i started to see someone and he wanted me back,

So you all see, it was like an unpleasant game of hide and seek, we wanting each other when we were already seeing someone else.

after that (about three years ago), we hung out together and i, at this time, had started practicing celibacy and respecting my body and anyone who respects my choice. x and i saw a numbers of times but no sexual intimacy took place leaving us tense,

Now, the problem is whenever i try to date anyone, i size the guy to 'x' and now, i have ended up single and worry that i will be too heart broken when i hear that he is getting married,  i don't know if he is dating anyone but he is well into that age of settling down so i guess it could be anytime.

i know and have come to realise that we cant have any other other kind of relationship asides being just friends but that is so difficult for me even though i am trying my best.

i always really liked him and he knows, he likes me too but i dont know what was amiss in the past.  and just chose to ignore the reality,  i want to get him off my thoughts totally,  but dont want to rush into a relationship like i did in the past just to get over him.

sometimes, i forget all about him for days, even weeks then thoughts of him just manage to creep in from nowhere,  i have been praying to God to deliver me from this mess as i recognise it is a big problem.

please for anyone who has been in this situation or anything like it or anyone and everyone who can advice, please write on,  criticisms are welcome too.

these matters of the heart isnt at all for the faint-hearted oo, 


thanks.