boxer022:
I read it several times but couldn't quite understand what you wrote.

That's the point

boxer022:
Your writing and question doesn't go well, review the storyline.

The writing is pretty legible, you just have to read slowly.

There's this girl with muscle in the body is the temple of the dog the guy was home as well so I can get the money from the government election sleeping beside beauty.

As we speak, the same time as me but I think are the best and we are in going around the gym because of my life.

This brings me to this question -- Why do people cheat in a relationship?

FERNANDEZISBACK:
She's being honest simcp boy....

I like that you called him a simp.

czarr:
Seun sef fit get alternate moniker wey him dey use insult people.

HilcomTech:



You are very bitter and have an excessive hatred for men and it shows on your post.

Not true

siofra:
Please for the record, I don't hate men. I love them because I have brothers, fathers, boyfriends and sugar daddies.

Never said you do. I said you're obsessed.

Read slowly

That reminds me...

I could be MadamVanessa: Hot MILF, and hardcore supporter of IPOB (By the way, I am, too. Not hardcore though).

Note: Anything said here is just a (Factual) joke and should be considered as such.

If there's one thing Nairaland members have in common, that would, most definitely be having and operating multiple monikers by one user.

I myself have and operate multiple monikers, and most of them are very active.

We literally create account to basically complement each of our many characteristics.

For example, Pst. Righteousness has been accused of having more than 1 monikers (Which isn't a sin anyways), which he occasionally uses to create doomsday threads, and then leaves a doomsday comment with his main moniker. Making him the first, second or third commenter, but surely among the first set.

Some of my other monikers are well recognized and popular. In fact, you'd be shocked if I reveal them on this thread.

You see... I could be SmellySperm: The guy whose sperm smells.

I could also be : Nairaland's bad news blogger. AKA Badnews (His alternate moniker).

I could be Iyaebe AKA Beebah2000: A wannabe feminist, who knows nothing about feminism, how it came to be, it purpose or goal. She thinks feminism is all about hating on men.

I could be GooodHardDick: The guy with the hardest d***, literally.

I could also be siofra: The girl so obsessed with men that most of her topics are related or closely, really closely related to men. (I like her though). She's also getting married to a man soon. .

Who knows?

I could be Candidlady: A Nairalander from Hausa tribe (or maybe not), who also hate on men.

Well, most female N'landers hate on men for absolutely no reasonable reason.

Speaking of females hating on men;

I could be FutureIsFemale: A low budget, hardcore feminist, whose hatred for men is on another level.
All she basically do on a daily basis is to surf the World Wide Web, looking for crimes, evil acts committed by just the male gender.

I could also be FERNANDEZISBACK: Slayer of online women bashers, or so she thought. This one is like MTN, Everywhere You Go!

I could be Shortyy: Well, just like her moniker, I'm also short of what to say.

I could also be slawormiir: Nairaland's yahoo boy. Wait a minute... Where the hell is this guy? Has he been damned by the efcc? Damn Nigger! Isoright.

Look, the list is endless.

I'll continue in the comment section.

sajmark:
SIMP jam cultists...

You don't know me.

Not a simp

Updated

Moeman:
space booked

Updated

"Cliff, are you okey? She asked."

How can anyone be okey after receiving such beating?

"And who are you?" The soldier asked my bestfriend, who was trying to help me up.

She told him she was my girlfriend.

"You better call an ambulance or a taxi to take this guy to the hospital before he dies here." The soldier said.

He asked someone from the crowd to go get a taxi.

He then proceeded to ask the guy what happened.

The taxi arrived few minutes later and I was taken to the hospital where I spent the rest of my Saturday.

My friend was with me all through till Sunday morning. Then she went home and came back later.

I was discharged same day at 4pm. She drove me to her house where I was taken care of.

The next day being Monday, I woke up at 9am. Still on the bed, I was trying to recreate the event of last Saturday when I heard a noise in the kitchen.

"This girl no go work?"

I got up and went straight to the kitchen, and there she was.

"Why didn't you go to work?" I asked.

"We were given today off" She answered with an attitude, leaving the kitchen for the sitting room.

I knew she was lying because her boss would never do such - not on Monday.

"How many of you?" I asked as I tried to catch-up with her.

"My whole department" She answered.

I knew she was lying to me. She, apparently, skipped work because of me. So I confronted her. I asked her why she had to do something like that.

That was when she lost it. She said all sort of sh!t to me. Like, she blamed me for everything that went wrong since the last Saturday.

What pained me more than anything was saying that I was beaten like a small boy by my fellow guy.

I was really pained by that statement. I never believed this girl could say such after all I went through on that Saturday because her.

I got up, picked few of my stuff in her place and left to my house.

While I was preparing to leave, she realised I was hurt by her statement and started apologizing, but her apology means nothing. The damage has been done already.

I was beaten real bad for her, and look what she said.

She's been calling, texting and even came to my house to plead but I didn't let her in.

I will never forgive her for as long as that statement of hers lives in my mind.

End

I was in my pyjamas, so I changed to something much better as we dash out.

We walked pass two streets and was on the third one, which is the street that leads to the market.

Church Street: The most dangerous street in the vicinity, housing all kinds of creatures living and roaming in human flesh.

We talked as we walk. Holding hands and walking side-by-side. Literally minding our God-given business.

On the other side of the street were three (3) weird looking creatures. Drinking & Smoking weed.

"Httssssss, fine girl! Hey, fine girl!!"

That was one of the three creatures, referring to my bestfriend. We kept walking like we heard nothing.

And again, but this time he said...

"Fine girl, na ur type I dey like. Na this kind nyash (ass) I go like chop. Come make I fck u."

This was when I got pissed and told my friend to wait on the spot.

I felt really disrespected by those statement and was going to confront the guy.

She pleaded I shouldn't go, but I was so mad to even hear her. So I continued.

I got to the guy and said...

"Guy why u dey disrespect us like this nah? You no see say na me and the girl dey waka?"

He draw closer and asked me...

"Wetin you wan do?"

He turned to his friends...

"See this guy ooo" he said, and turned back at me.

"Wetin you wan come do? You wan fight me?" He said and pushed me.

"Cliff? Clifford??"

That was my girl calling. But my rage was already filled to the brim. All I wanted to do was to hit him. And that was exactly what I did.

I hit him. He couldn't believe I could. None of the onlookers believed I could do something so courageous and yet stupid.

I was already regretting letting the anger in me get the best of me, but it was already too late as there was no way to reverse the punch.

I knew there was no way I'm leaving their presence without a serious beating. So, what did I do, you asked?

I hit him the second time!

That was all I could clearly remember as he pounced on me and gave me a beating meant for 10 guys.

I felt each punch like I was being hit with an iron. I couldn't even run - like, I wanted to but couldn't.

All this while, my friend was just crying, shouting and begging people to separate us (Or, should I say rescue me from this creature).

People were just there looking. Some were even video recording. No single person from the crowd could even try to rescue me.

The fight (beating) lasted for (I don't know, but I guess) 10 minutes, at least.

All this while, this guy's friends didn't budge. I thought they were going to join hands with guy but they didn't. They also didn't try to stop their friend.

They were just there drinking and smoking still. I guess they knew what their friend is capable of.

They just sat there, minding their business as if nothing was happening.

While I was still receiving it, a military man, who, apparently, noticed the crowd and decide to see what was going on.

That was the first time in my life to be happy of the presence of a military personnel.

"Hey! Stop that!!" The soldier shouted as he approaches.

"I said stop that" he shouted again.

That was when the guy stopped the beating.

The soldier commanded us to go down on our knees. The other guy was able to knee, but I couldn't.

I lay down on the spot and was breathing like someone who just defeated Usain bolt in a race.

My bestfriend rushed down to me.

...

It was Saturday; Workers' rest day (I don't have a physical job anyway; I'm a freelancer -- I don't work on weekends though).

I was in the sitting room gaming on my console when she walked in (My bestfriend).

"Hey Cliff (Not my real name), What's up?" She asked.

"Can't you knock?" I replied.

"Why I go knock?" She said as she approaches me.

I was playing PES2020. She grabbed the other gamepad and we started playing 1vs1.

As time passed, we became hungry. I told her to order some food from Jumia, but she refused and said she wants to cook the food herself.

She asked me what I would eat. I told her. Then she said I should follow her to the nearest local market; something I detest so much.

I told her I wasn't going, but she wasn't having it. She wouldn't take a 'NO' for an answer. So, reluctantly, I agreed to go with her.

A decision I would later regret. I wish I could see the future.

...

SmellySperm:
you took a bullet for her

I did.

SmellySperm:
and u never die?

Luckily.

dacblogger:
Red pillers are coming for your head
How dare you fall in love

I'm not in love. I'm in a relationship with the right person.

I don't believe in loves.

As for the redpill... I'm an Alpha Male

Not like I have to share this here. I just want someone from here to learn a thing.

We can't have all we wish to. We can't.

I've always wanted to date someone (a girl) with big ass and big front. I swore never to settle for less; Never believed I could.

Those were all I looked out for whilst searching - until I met her.

Her type is rare. Never believed I could find such beauty with brain in the country where I come from.

I took a bullet for her in the past, and I would take more just for her.

I never believed I could say this - She's all I've been searching for.

Happy women's day to her.