₦airaland Forum

Man U park bus

What a wasted chance from lac

Confused young

bopm:

don't u think its too early

damoneymag:
your ass is getting kicked tonight

we came with guns bro not ass

Arsenal all the way...


We gunning are united nets like terminator

mumumugu:
God forbid.we can't have two mumu in a home

So me and a lady was chatting last night. She was like she wish her guy was like her (not taking things too personal) saying the dude takes things personal and she doesn't find it impressing.. Wishing she wants someone that is carefree and understands her nature of carefreeness, that she wish she marries someone like her

She asked if I wish to marry someone like me?.. I said nooo

I'm very smart,very neat, witty and way generous.
I will like someone with similar qualities but not exactly as me.

Would you like to marry someone like you?

Which way Nigeria


she Na like this we go deh deh?

Sense making

God forbid bad thing

FlySly05:
SleekBack, is that you niqqur

a PIM.P named Sleekbag

I love that movie die. Boondocks

Its these kind of people that may cause other genuine needy beggars not to get help.

I know things are hard, but u shouldn't play on peoples intelligence to gain sympathy

Right from independence until Now, no Nigerian Leader was ever prepared for Leadership. They either usurp power or are illegally imposed or get in thru deceit and cheap propaganda to unsit the incumbent. Nothing new. Similar to how America is only living on past glory since from after the times of JF Kennedy.


There's little or no possibility in passing an Examination you never prepared for.

Nigerian Leaders has history in never having a definite blue prints, No realistic agenda, just reasons upon reasons why the sitting president/head of state has to go. These reoccurrences is what make an accidental leader wait four month before appointing ministers whom have not served a year and starting to have indictments up and down.

Similarly, it's an accidental leader that grants presidential pardon to a disgracing treasury looter who dresses like the opposite sex to deceive.

It is an accidental leader that will call another accidental leader a failure, just because another accidental leader decides to turn a blind eye to his excesses and withhold the full power of the law from catching up with him and declaring him cleared. All because he now shares same sentiments or belongs to same party.

Nigeria is blessed in human capital and natural resources, but would it be out of place if one should say we are CURSED in Leadership?

That's pathetic

Jones4190:
Atiku meeting with obasanjo
Obasanjo springs up from a seat in his expansive sitting room as soon as Atiku is ushered in. He smiles briefly and offers a handshake. Atiku throws himself at him for a hug.
“Please, sit down. Good to see you again. I’m sorry I couldn’t give an earlier appointment. I’ve been travelling. The problem in Zimbabwe, Kenya and so many others. Anyway, what brings you this time?”
“Baba, I thank you for your time, for receiving me despite your tight schedule. I won’t take much of your precious time sir. I bring peace. You’re our leader; our pillar. We do not think it will be wise to take any important step without informing you and carrying you along. In this country today, nobody can say you don’t count. You are not just an ordinary person; you’re an elder statesman. And…”
Obasanjo cuts in, raising his right hand. “Please, go into the specific. What exactly do you want? That long introduction seems to be confusing. Straight to the point.”
“Baba, I’m running and I wish to get your blessing.”
Smiling, Obasanjo looks straight at Atiku, his visage betraying some incredulity. “You ’re running? Where to? Why? Is anybody pursuing you?”
“No Baba. I’m planning to contest the presidency on the platform of our great party, the PDP. And I am honoured and privileged to be telling you this so that I can receive your blessing. Former President Jonathan and many other eminent Nigerians have advised me to visit you and settle whatever differences we may have. This is my mission sir.”
“Hee he. Jonathan asked you to come here? Am I in their party? Please, I’m a statesman. I announced it that I’m no longer a politician. When I resigned from PDP or whatever they call themselves, I didn’t do corner corner o. I tore their card. So, if that boy, em…eeem…eeeem… Jona, is telling you to come and you’re coming here, is he sincere? I remain a farmer and a statesman. One million Atikus can’t change that whether they are running or walking or flying. I’m sorry, Mr Atiku.”
“You seem to be getting it all wrong sir. I’m not asking you to come out of retirement and campaign for me. No. I’m only informing you and asking you to bless me so that I can succeed.”
“Again, I’m not a politician. Are you listening? I’m too honest and frank to remain in that circle – of lies, backstabbing, intrigues and corruption. Deceit. No. I’m done. My politics now is Nigeria. Anybody who says Nigeria will not rise and move forward, I am ready to go konkobilo with that person. So, oga, that is my position.”
“Baba, I salute your sincerity – and courage. You are not the type who will deceive anybody to score cheap political points. You’re blunt. There are many of us in the race. That is why I crave your endorsement. You must have an opinion on this important matter.”
“Yes. I have heard that some of you are warming up. I’m not the type that fears. I have my opinion on each and everyone of you. The other boy (wetin be im name now o?). Obasanjo scratches it aggressively. He looks up and continues.
“Makarfi. Yes; I hear he too wants to contest. I know he used to be governor of Kaduna. He was a senator. And now chairman of what they call Caretaker Committee. Hmmm…
“Sule Lamido is my boy, but dem say he get baggage. And you know Buhari is a soldier. He will simply ambush him and that will be the end of the matter.
“Buhari sef. I said so that he will not steal. He will fight corruption and jail all the thieves making noise and gallivanting all over the place. But Buhari may not do well in the economy. I said so. No be so?”
“Baba, I thank you for your insight. The words of our elders… . Do I take it that I have your blessing to pick the PDP ticket for 2019?”
Hmm…hmmmm…hmm (Obasanjo clears his thrioat). “PDP my foot. I don’t care who gets the PDP ticket. Dat one na dem toro. I’m not a member and I don’t plan to be one. Let them sell it or give it or dash it to whoever they like. Me o, Olusegun Aremu Okikiola Obasanjo, I don’t care. A statesman I will remain. I thank you for visiting.”
A crowd of reporters and photographers have set up a camp outside the door. As Obasanjo and his guest emerge from the main house, they spring up onto their feet and rushed towards them.
“Baba, good afternoon. How are you sir?”
Obasanjo, smiling without showing his teeth:”I dey kampe, as you can see.”
“How did the meeting go?”
“Which meeting? No meeting o. You know Christmas will soon be here. The former VP came to wish me merry Christmas. Is anything wrong with that? And I wish you all Merry Christmas and a prosperous new year.”
After a handshake with Obasanjo, Atiku walks briskly towards his car, adjusting his agbada. The reporters rush to catch up with him.
“Sir, how did it go? Is it true you came to tell Baba to support your ambition? Did he promise to back you?”
“Baba has spoken and that is all. I have no comments – for now. Have a nice day, my friends.”
An aide opens the door. Atiku jumps in and the car rolls out of the large compound.

damn!! this is so vivid and look so real ..I can't believe I read everything from start to finish with vivid imaginations...bro u are good writer. have u consider writing a movie?

Nigeria itself is underdeveloped, so what does it components stand to boast of?

Nothing person no hear for this world

Nothing person no go see for this world

ScotFree:
Kai!! You're really vexing. Very infectious. Now i don dey vex too

you mean my vex is making you vex?

Well, I wonder why a grown-up like randy Orton put on only pants in front of large audience all in the name of wrestling

And why people close their eyes when kissing is still a mystery

But why ladies wear just pants and bra in hip hop videos while the dude are fully dress is not my business

I still don't know why rappers rub their palms in slow motion in many hip hop videos, I guess it you've noticed?


I really cant tell how it happened I'm just bemused, I'm afraid my gfriend added codeine to my coffee

Thank you for listening lemme come and be going

Leshyne:
Hallo,

My fiancee has lied and I forgave her. But this time it's troubling. She recently got money to invest in biz but lied that she got it from her colleague in the office.

I asked her several times but she said I can go ask the guy, presuming I will not, and I didn't.

I stumbled on her email n saw the alert she got from someone showing where she got the money from and d same guy has been sending her money in the past.

Before I confronted her, I asked her again but she sarcastically dismissed me. Then, I asked her "do u know any Dan" that's the man sending money.

Shocked, she said his a friend and won't answer any question again since I suspected her and kept it secret.

Please, imagine if you were in my shoes, what will you do

first I cant be in your shoes I've got plenty of shoes myself

So you mean she's secretly collecting money from another man ?

Are you vexed cos she kept it secrete or you vexed cos she denied it or you vexed cos another man is giving her money beside you or you vexed cos the money is more than what you do give her or you vexed that you ain't consider relevant enough to be let-in into your wife's personal business ?

Or you vex cos buhari is the president or you vexed that, Apc is the ruling party, or you vex that Mugabe was oust or u vexed that the incoming presidents son is already displaying dollars on his I.g page or you vexed that he is already declaring himself a minister?

Cos me I'm vexed that I stay in Lagos and hardly rest from the sound of generators each time NEPA "carry light", ; I vex whenever I see good guys falling for cheap hoes, I also vex whenever I see a guy forming big boy on I.G with borrowed car but can hardly afford a bicycle tire, I vex gan when ever arsenal lose to man u and my nosy neighbour knock my door to ask how market?. I vex wella whenever I see snake on any thread and glo network didn't let me comment on time as FTC before Lala move it to FP, I vex when ever I and my younger cousin is with the dstv remote watching telemundo and I want to change it to Supersports3, only for my mum to say Juliet pls increase the volume small I'm coming, , I vex any time I say a joke only for someone i call a loser in class to say it louder and everyone began laughing, and who even laughed the most is my secret class crush..i vex



So eh en what did you say even happen again?

Jesus!

What a world!

Ogo de- emi pin

Rip

BigSarah:
So there's this guy in my department looks so much like my primary school sweetheart who passed away .
Anytime I see him I get so drawn to him.. I'm a really shy person like nervous, Sweating,heartracing kinda shy, only around him though.
So I took his number off my department group chat and started sending him all sort of texts and he replied back well for the first 3days but he kept saying that I should tell him who I'm (I didn't use my number got a new line, just for that purpose). As of Yesterday He Sent me this mean text

.Mtchew.... Wtf
Sarah or whatever ur name is, dont call nor text me again
Who cares abt who u are.
Let's dis be the last time u call and text me..
To hell with u, mtchew ..

I didnt call him throughout that day, but I called today he still asked who is dis, I ignored the question then he hanged up.
What do I do now? Telling him it's me is gonna be so embarrassing to me I've poored out my heart shamelessly in those texts and it'll be horrible if he ends up not dating me after the revelation.
I don't wanna miss him please Tips

. And nobody cared enough to tell this young one to FACE HER STUDIES and leave boys alone

Princedapace:
Come to me and I will give u rest baby.

U are pretty.. As for him, forget him.. He will just use and throw u away..

Come to me

who are u...?

come to u kor..go to u Ni...


Ole...fi omolomo le o

Peachess:
Funny thing is that I can't be in that kind of situation cos I don't feel anymore, I don't care about people. It's all trash to me.

So there was this guy who came to repair a home appliance...he didn't face his business..he got distracted looking at another appliance he didn't have any business with. .so he decided to leave his business and face another...






U know what?? ....he got into trouble.




Moral of the narration: Learn to face your business..try not to get distracted or u may get into trouble like that man.Thank u

emusmithy:
Obviously: Some folks are quite immature in relating with others. You even tried to keep the convo going.

don't be an ass licker either ..two wrongs don't make a right .

Sorry If I sound insulting I just didn't know the right word to describe such.

Accept my apologies in advance.

Peachess:
Yoruba people can be so annoying sometimes, so why were you using Yoruba English (or whatever) while addressing me? Do you think everyone is Yoruba? You guys need stop that annoying shit you do (addressing someone with Yoruba or English translated from yoruba others can't understand), not everyone is Yoruba. This not the first time it's happening. Even if seun is Yoruba, does nairaland look like a Yoruba forum to you?
For the record I don't believe in the shit called love, I just wrote a general comment some people say. If your gay ass is stuck with a dick, doesn't mean everyone is like you. Don't ever quote again ass hole.

pls stop calling people ass hole.

Have u really taken your time to view how a asshole look like...guess u haven't..it smells and irritates...a God created being shouldn't be term as one..God bless u dear....I'm sure he will stop quoting u.

iammolise:
Does any other person here sense blackmail in this... check the woman's reply to bidemi's reply comment u'll discover she couldn't spell out 'God', instead she said 'got' livet... She's afraid of the consequence of lying with God's name.

But on the other hand... Why do all bidemi's like sex too much
Why

how many bidemi's have u met?

Labels want my name beside their X like Malcom ....everybody gat a deal I did it without one...


One of the beautiful lines I've heard in a long time.

Our naija artiste don't do music they make calculated noise up and down

KOPT55:
That blazer alone can feed you and family for two years and educate you up to master degree level in a Nigerian federal university.

eassssssyy bro

Calm down