₦airaland Forum

[quote author=oluwakekz post=69950807]Hello. Please a kind advice is all I need .

Have being dating this lady since last year December 8months now. I met her at her sister's place that happens to be my mum's neighbour when she came for a visit. She just finish school and looking for a job. We were both looking for job for her even if it's far from her place (Ekiti) as I thought she should be productive to herself.

Thought I was lucky when she called weeks ago to inform me that a friend called her about one vacancy here in Lagos. I was so happy because I can't do long distance relationship (experience)

She came to my place this said Friday and stayed till Sunday. She left for that so called friend's place because we think it's not too safe to get to the interview venue late. She got the job and we thank God......

After two weeks of resumption, I saw this advice on nairaland that talk about 10 Questions To Ask Your Partner In Order To Build Trust "What do you find hard to talk about with me?" She said "nothing " I try talk to her to open up because I can't settle down with someone that will hide anything from me, then she said my ex got me this job. She has kept in contact with him. I ask her" we've being together for three days, you left my house for your ex house and passed the night there? You keep contact with him without telling me all this while? You guys have being seeing each other since you resumed (two weeks?) All she kept saying is am not cheating on you.....

I really love her and I'm confused right now. Please I need advice on what to do because am just tired right now.


OP, I don't think you should pass judgement yet. No two relationships are the same, hence you wouldn't be able to get everybody to answer unanimously, that "No" she's not cheating or "Yes" she's cheating. Every woman wants a man they can look up to, not just to provide, but in regards to the feeling of security in all sense (Social and otherwise), especially when they are fresh out of school. this is when they start taking mental checks and comparing guys socially for a potential "husband".
I think you should take sometime and do a mental check on where you are right now and compare it with where you want to be and then start taking quick, decisive and progressive steps towards that. she is with you right now, however if you're not actively working on self improvement or aren't doing something that would deem you progressive, she'll leave you in three or four months. Women get easily distracted in Lagos, especially with that place being a social jungle, and the lots of hustling guys that are deemed "prospects" there.
How you handle this particular milestone in your relationship would determine if you guys grow together or fall apart. try to sit down with her outside of your place or hers, take her on a walk or sit somewhere quiet and ask her about things "be empathetic", not commanding, but rather listen to her and think before you reply. see and guage her responses, then follow your guts.

This is just my two cents, not the gospel

yungchivvy:
I don't know them.. They don't no me.. Wgaf Abeg who wan open bakery.. Contact me biko

How far? I dey reason am. Wetin e go entail?

Guy i heard there are loads of snakes there, na so?

@Gbadexy, egbo, how can i get in touch with you?

eshiosunday123:
Booust is a training academy where you LEARN TO CODE & GET EMPLOYED.

Are you a proven self starter and passionate about becoming an elite software developer? Do you thrive learning in a community driven environment?
Apply here http://www.booust.com/page/home#ch-section-form

How am i to get in touch? please can you help with a contact phone number?

How do i get in touch? I am unable to send an email to them and there is no followup phone number