₦airaland Forum

he didnt give off the impression it was a life or death problem-had i had known i could have either changed or been aware so it wasnt such a surprise.it was said with a smile on his face-i didnt no.
I was with an abusive man for about 9 years-apart from the abuse he also had horrible habits and if i mentioned them for himto rectify them he did nothing to make it better.Had he have said-oh sorry-and e.g-put the toilet seat down-i wouldnt have minded.
If ever the guy that just dumped me commented on anything-i would rectify it,

its weird i just laughed at the children in need show thats on BBC(its Children in need day in the UK-raising money for children)-and i thought-wow i laughed, How much of a complete stupid cow am i-its not like someones died-but i just keep crying on and off-since last weekend-i went to an appointment with my sons headteacher and i just burst out crying!!!what an idiot

i will eat something-i had weetabix for breakfast and a couple of yoghurts for lunch.

no exactly how you feel-ive cried every single day since it happened-i cried at 2 appointments i had this week,i cried going shopping-i am crying now-its such a horrible feeling.
ive never been in a relationship that was going well and had it snatched away-the only other relationship i had was abusive and completely different feelings.

I havent been eating very well since it happened-i just have an appetite but cant find the will to do anything about it.

lol-no my above answer was the correct one!!!

I was looking for information on the Grail message as he follows this and it directed me to this forum. that was my only other thread on here-wanting to find out about that,as i am a cHristian and i'd never heard of the grail message

i see-as i said, I am English-the man i'm talking about is Nigerian.

he wasnt moody we got on very well although hed be quite quiet and withdrawn sometimes if he had a problem with something

My initial answer was to say women suffer heartbreak the most-but-1-i'm a woman and 2-i just got dumped so i would say that i suppose.
whoever is the dumpee suffers the most-the one who got dumped-be it male or female but thats kind of obvious-i'll shut up now!!!

Thank you-
what country are you from if you dont mind my asking?

Its like a flower-growing absolutely fine, might need a little trim to keep it healthy-then someones come along and instead of pruning it theyve just-chopped it, it might grow back it might not.

I said yesterday to him-well i text him to say i would improve the way i do things-we can keep in touch and maybe meet up and see how things go.
All he said was-just keep in touch.
This is the same man who used to send me the most lovely messages-couldnt get enough of me up until Sunday-he used to compliment me all the time.

Funny you said that because i mentioned OCD to him-yesterday-and sent him some links from the internet about it-thing is-for him even if it was-he can cope with his own ideals and expectations-i have fallen short of his expectations-despite the fact that we got on so well in EVERY way-i am now not with him.
he says he is the way he is because he was bought up that way in his home country-his Dad is the same-apparently.

sounds like you may have a hygiene problem.
Guys dont normally complain about things like this, it tends to be the ladies. The face that he mentioned it means there is a big problem.
YOu need to sort yourself out. You based in London ?



Also-he knows alot of people arent like him-and i do have a problem myself when someones not clean in fact i said to him a few things i do which he doesnt-but i wouldnt dump someone over it.
Its a very big issue to him.its about his personal safety.

And yes I am English-i live in London.

Obviously i will say i dont have a hygiene problem-but i really dont.
he has even said-this is his problem not mine-well he didnt use the word problem but anyway.
i would never be with someone without being clean-i just, he says he saw what he saw and cant get it out his head.

Noone has ever complained of my cleanliness before-apart from the fact i'm too clean-and dont stop cleaning, if anything but he said for a while now hes been observing me-this weekend was the straw that broke the camels back.

he has ways of doing things that he says are as important as breathing-well they were my words which he agreed with.
if i sat on his bed i would occassionally forget and put my slippers on there, i kept a tissue i'd used next to me before i put it in the bin-what else-i forgot to wash my hands once when i came in from outside and ate,i wiped my hands on my trousers-i dont know why-after i ate.
what made it worse-and this is quite personal i had an all over shower but didnt wash myself in, a place, because i didnt have a flannel which i would normally use.its not like i never wash-i am a very clean person but for some reason i cant really answer i didnt-this freaked him out and he said he cant trust that i ever properly wash myself-or words to that afffect.
if hes with someone and they are going to be close to him he has to know that he can be free around them and he doesnt feel that way anymore.he no longer feels safe around me.
he said his sexual desire for me has decreased and it may come back but he doesnt know but i can keep in touch with him
in the last day i stayed after this happened he couldnt sleep because he said he cant get the thoughts out of his head-that my hygeine is low-and he has regularly been "close" to me-he wouldnt kiss me or even really touch me-it made me feel like a leper and it hurt so much.
he is one of those people that -well you cant change his mind-and i wish he would but i dont think he will.
On the way back-what made it worse was i had bought him a keyring and i couldnt get the other part as it was never in the shop-the first bit he had-i walked past the shop and ironically they had the 2nd part of the keyring there.i feel so bad.

i am crying writing this-i REALLY liked him-still do but for reasons he couldnt control he said he couldnt be with me.We got on so well.

I have just got dumped basicallly-.I'm a grown woman-i have kids and got into a relationship not even for that long-a few months so why do i feel like crying all the time.
I feel so heartbroken.

To be honest, I am still wondering how some of these White women do it. Strange!!! But that's not to say, if one should look closely that, one would not find pockets of Black men/women here and there practising it. They certainly do as our people are good at emulating/copying any thing they see in the West. If some of them would participate in party which is equally another name for 'wife/husband/girlfriend/boyfriend swopping' what makes anyone here doubt this? Hell, no!!!
Posted on: Yesterday at 08:55:54 PMPosted by: Theblessed



AS i said before-not so good at the quote thing.
why is it that if black people are having threesomes/being unfaithful-or the like -they are "emulating/copying anything they see in the west"?
So if black people are doing it -its not their fault they got it from white people?
How ridiculous is that.
If i made a comment like that against black people it'd be discriminatory.
AS i said before-it has nothing to do with colour.Although saying that obviously people have religious beliefs in which they follow-but that doesnt mean they dont get tempted and thats not to do with colour-but to do with what religion they are.

WE still base our ideas on people we know-or friends of friends-or a story someone heard at a bus stop one day.
Dont we not realise in this day and age you cant tar all people with the same brush just because they happen to have the same skin colour-arent we beyond that now people?

Nothing that money can buy thats for sure,

oh is also in a serious relationship-i see what it means now!!!!

although black women cheat too but in a decret manner
,

So you personally may hear more about white womens shenanigans but black women do it in a more discreet way-possibly-just picking up on what you said-not agreeing or disagreeing.

WEll it doent mean it doent happen then-just means you dont hear about it

I must be living in another universe because this is not a world i know.

Maybe i'm stupid