₦airaland Forum

Fvckhypocrite:
Eiyyaaa i feel your pain pele
But your husband is somehow wicked oo he can't even care for a good wife like you, can't you buy those shoes by yourself or u prefer he get it 4 u?

I want him to be able to buy me things. It bothers me he invests time contacting women with sexy shoes at their house goes to their house sometimes at night to get them, come home leave them in my closet ... and I dont see any money we have gotten from this "investment" so some girls shoes are in my closet from a strange woman my husband sent money, then he sends back home to Nigeria, to what girls I wonder?

How can he hustle so hard and he cant buy me one thing after all the bills I pay?
Why does he have to buy sexy womens things go to their apartments? And why cant I see the bank account statement?

It pains me every time. One time he left a chat open I saw at 10pm at night he went to some young womens house. I cried so much that night I went into labor. He should know how much I hate it and now it comes up again because he has done this for one year now knows it put me in labor two years ago but he still goes? Now he wont show me the bank statement

And also which girls are getting them in Nigeria? Are they just exes? My mind goes everywhere because the burden is becoming heavy

He should know I just work come home pay bills pay all bills and my physical health has suffered and so to have these sexy womens items in my closet that are not mine, while I just feel more stressed, dont feel beautiful at all. Why do I have to be in pain like this?

Fvckhypocrite:
it is well

pele ijeoma

But ehnn from your write up your husband is properbly cheating

For him declining to show u his receipt means there is something his hiding

Don't you have any elders over there that you can consult?

Its not to the point where elders are needed but what is it hes hiding? I am very transparent. I could not think of doing bad to my family in anyway. But i am getting grey hairs, working more hours and I have scars and weight. I want shoes and nice things. I think I deserve it. If someone is so savvy to buy such nice girl things for other women and this is my husband, why cant I get any shoes? Car? Something. I stress over money constantly.
When i was young i had good income as well I had a car, I could go out to eat, go spend money at the mall and not bother. Now every ounce of money goes to my family. I dont feel good when I look in the mirror. I see a woman who once was. I would like to feel beautiful again. I would like my husband to hustle to buy me nice shoes, a pedicure.

[quote author=BaddieFreak post=96908371][/quote]hahaha �

BaddieFreak:
That's why we have refused to buy things and spend on guys. These men are not loyal.
Keep pressuring him to provide you his bank account and his bank statement since you've done yours and try to find out his phone password to check his chats, it might be helpful. I really feel for you

Yes ooo.. one time I did get to see it because it was left unlocked but I noticed he is deleting chats before I see them. I dont want to believe he cheated or had something romantic but what was he really doing at these ladies apartments?

I dont want to bother a man who loves his family but the thing ways on me. There are facts you know? As a woman, what would i look like going to buy sexy mens underclothing late in the evening? Would a man not be suspicious of such a lady?

But the thing I really want to see is the bank spendings

Dear Nairaland,

I know this place can be vicious and also insightful so please take it easy on me!

I grew up abroad by one Igbo/ one Ijaw parent and my husband grew up in south east before he came to study here in Lithuania. I completed my studies, learned lithuanian and would say I have a good job here. I have learned to fit in here but my husband only came a few years ago and after studies didnt learn the language yet. We talk about maybe moving to London but in the mean time we are here. He has only been able to get a menial job, but he is a good man and we are taking care of our two year old son just fine.

We are for the most part stable. He has the idea like many of us abroad to start shipping items to Nigeria. I like this idea and with the little money he gets he picks items from a website where people are selling brand new items for sometimes 10% of the price almost give away and then sends home. Its smart however I have had to buckle down and take care. Its not like village life over in Nigeria we have big bills with rent almpst 30% of our total income. I have been hustling to keep us together and I only spend on us. I have gotten grey hairs and only think of family and spend on family. I pay for some of his bills too and for the most part it is fair because untill he learns the ropes here, a man does what he can.

I was fine with this but this past year we have been bickering. I havent seen that much money be made from our shipments to nigeria. Also he has been buying sexy womens items, pumps, sexy tops. His means of doing this has been contacting the ladies and going to their homes to buy. I for the most part thought well he is shipping home to Nigeria right? Why not but the thing is weighing on me. I recently told him I think we need to rethink our financial planning should we save to move to London. We use a payment service to send money back and fourth. I have been very transparent with him what I spend on and keep a sheet with all my spendings and showed it to him. I asked him can he do the same and he declined... this has me suspicious of the fact that he buys these sexy womens items and sends them money. Meanwhile i have not gotten a new pair of shoes for two years but he with the little money he gets is sending sexy womens items to nigeria in container but his wife gets no clothing?

I miss being beautiful, pampered. I dont know why this man with the money he gets he is buying sexy womens items going to womens apartments and getting these beautiful things but cant get me one thing.

And the last straw was that he wont show me who he is sending money to..

I feel betrayed and very suspicious.

I work a lot and have bought him several gifts make sure his bills are paid but he cant show me his bank statement? He cant buy me one pair of shoes?

Ladies and gentlemen I love this man but I feel suspicious of a cheat and someone who is taking for granted that I work hard to keep this family together. I have wanted a pedicure for so long.. but I get nothing. What does he get from buying these womens clothes?

This is my condition: i want to tell him only focus on other items like mens club clothing and shoes, no more womens clothing, no more going to womens apartments to buy sexy things and that he should show me his bank statement.

Is this not fair? I think I have done more than enough and asking him to change what he buys for container is not a big deal. Mens clothing is a big thing in Nigeria. This arrangement is ruining my trust.

I dont want him going to womens apartments and I want to see his bank statement. Would you not want the same in your relationship.

Please advise

Thanks so much

IJ

Yo