₦airaland Forum

No one does it better. He's the boss!!!

mencade5: ooo pee,

make i confess i have done most of what you wrote there. God forgive me.

It wont happen again i promise

Confirm!!!

Zedric: broda, those girls wicked o. Dem chop u sotey, u see am as normal tin. I dey sorry for u

Truth is scary!!!

sweetellar: Wonderful piece. Onye nwere nti, ya nuru. Dudes want a good looking, classy-looking, well- put- together lady. Know it comes with a lot of baggage.

Ukpara okpoko gburu, nti shiri ya!!!

Houseofglam7: I find this piece quite entertaining.

Thanks boss!!!

Waspy: Funny but gospelly true....... You'll be suprised how many Naija boys and girls are playing out the Op's post Pls Mods, this has got to reach FP, lots of Naija youths are pipedreaming.

Mods should help move it to Front page ASAP!!!

corisande:
Lmao
Runsbabes them don see justification for their thing

wasak: breathtaking piece i should say.
bottom line; let every man live according to his means. both d lover and d runs girl.

Yeah bro...

5naira: What poem is that

Poem? Hmmmmmm

My Dear Bros,

I am tired of you whining about your girlfriend. What is it that you want? What are your expectations? She grew up in a city where “chop my money” by P-square is the soundtrack of our existence. She has Eldee singing, “ki lo fe, shey moto ni?” (what do you want, is it a car?); where Skuki is telling her to stop complaining that the sex is sore after obtaining a Prada purse; and Olamide is demanding that she “go down low” before she can get whatever expensive bric-a-brac she wants.

She is on the internet watching flamboyant proposals on YouTube- one guy pays for the whole seats in a movie theatre just so he can propose to his girlfriend over a Sex and the City footage. Another pays for advertisement space at a basketball game just so his popcorn-loving babe can see herself on big screen as he pops the question: “Will you

marry me?”

She has friends in school who drive around in Kia Optima bought by boyfriends working in Abuja.

That is her reality. You met her that way- a broke student with expensive dreams, living with a retired father and five siblings waiting every month, with gluttony for a cape, ready to dive into the old man’s pocket to gobble their own share of his pension. Sometimes they wait for months, and months turn to years, while sons become petty thieves and daughters convert to part-time prostitutes.

You met her that way- with an expensive ipad and no job. You didn’t question the Louboutin she wore on your first date; you didn’t raise an eyebrow when you saw her rocking a N75,000 swatch; you admired her head full of weaves and nodded approvingly. That weave costs N230,000. Don’t you know? Have you been living under a rock? So what are you complaining about?

After six months, the excitement of what she must have felt when her eyes settled on your good looks have worn off considerably; her true needy nature is in full bloom, and you start to rant, turn to a preacher yelling: “Money is not everything. Why are women so desperate and greedy? Money cannot buy happiness…”

Is love going to pay her fees and keep her greed for the good things of life at bay? So dad’s pension has been delayed for the fifth month. The last time he almost died on the queue waiting for hours, now he has announced to all his children- all shacked up in one sorry Nigerian University or the other- to go fend for themselves. Their only source of support is as good as dead.

Your babe is in her second year studying business administration. She has bills to pay and no clue how to get it sorted. She has a mop on her head (been sitting there for over nine weeks) that she needs to get rid of (to affix another more glorified one); her knickknacks are running out…and there you stand, with your portmanteau and a badly beaten golf car, talking about love and beautifully written letters.

Why do we like to buy trouble in the open market like this? How do you expect a struggling student of the Federal Republic of Nigeria with zero parent/government support, and siblings who are just as deprived, to worry about love and constant pings, or care about plastic red flowers you buy once a year on Valentine’s Day?

Think

Leave the student to focus on her life and the ugly challenges threatening to consume her. Stay away, your love is the last thing she needs. Unless that love comes with pocket money and a Hyundai saloon car, just forget it. You are complicating her life even more with your N70,000 job.

Why don’t you find a woman…you know? A woman with a job, who would shriek with joy when you ping her? One you can spend hours with talking about love and sweet nothings and she wouldn’t ask for recharge cards.

Aren’t you tired of being an ATM? It’s not like you have anything really. Your salary can barely sustain you. You’ve neglected your mother just so you can take Miss Under-graduate to the cinema every weekend to make up for the Blackberry Q300 you couldn’t buy for her.

Hian! Wake up, man! If you were my brother I’ll slap you out of this thick delirium. Be wise. Love with wisdom. With a N70,000 pay slip every month, the last thing you need is her love.

Soon you’ll start planning a wedding and children in your state of lack- the two of you walking into the arms of penury; claiming to have been captured by love. You see why you deserve a material lover? –Because your brain is on permanent retreat.

Missjargo: The topic says "for the girls" I don't know what u are doing here sef.
Me? I never get tired of reading this

Thanks jare!!!

For the girls - your vagina

Looking after your vagina

The vagina is the opening that leads from your external genitals (between your legs) to the uterus (womb) and your other internal reproductive organs. The skin you can see between your legs on the outside of your genitals is called the vulva. The neck or opening of the uterus inside the vagina is called the cervix.

The Hymen

Many people think the hymen is like a piece of gladwrap that seals the end of the vagina and that the first time you have sex it is broken. The hymen is actually a collar of tissue attached to the vaginal wall just inside the vaginal opening, with an opening in the centre. All women are born with a hymen.

The thickness and elasticity of the hymen varies according to the level of oestrogen (female hormones) in the body. Before puberty, the hymen does not have much stretch, so would usually be damaged if a large enough object passed through it. Once you go through puberty and start to develop oestrogen, the hymen becomes thickened and more elastic in nature. At this point, it looks like a hair scrunchy. It will easily accommodate an object such as a tampon or penis and simply stretches out and back.

Women sometimes bleed the first time they have sex, because some hymens are more elastic than others. There is no way of predicting who has a stretchier hymen, and who will bleed and who won't. However, many women will not bleed the first time they have sex. Some women develop a small tear in the hymen edge when it stretches and this may bleed. Usually this is not serious and heals quickly. Others may feel some pain or discomfort. The important message here is that we cannot tell by looking at someone's hymen whether they’re still a virgin or not.

Vaginal discharge

What’s normal?

Following puberty, a milky white discharge without any smell from the vagina is normal. This discharge is due to the female hormone oestrogen and bacteria that are normally present in the vagina. The amount of discharge varies from woman to woman, and can vary according to different stages of the menstrual cycle (your periods).

What is not normal?

It is normal and healthy to have some vaginal discharge. A healthy vagina usually feels wet. The wetness is a healthy discharge that keeps the vagina clean. The healthy discharge is clear or whitish and dries yellow on your underwear. There should be no noticeable smell if you wash every day. If there is any change to the colour, smell, amount or texture of this discharge, this could mean something is going on inside your vagina and could be an infection, especially if you have had unprotected sex.

An abnormal vaginal discharge may:

-be an increased amount of discharge
-have an unpleasant smell
-be a yellow or green colour
-be accompanied by itching, irritation or swelling and pain (in the vulva or vagina).

Abnormal vaginal discharge may be caused by:

-a sexually transmissible infection
-a tampon that is left in too long
-something put into the vagina and left there
-an allergy to latex (condoms) or medicated vaginal creams
other irritation.

Vaginal bleeding

What’s normal?

Normal bleeding (the menstrual period) varies a lot from woman to woman and usually persists for three to seven days every month. Some women have light bleeding while others experience heavy bleeding for a day or two, which then becomes lighter. A normal menstrual cycle occurs every 22 to 35 days.

During adolescence, as girls grow older, the interval between periods can be quite irregular with each woman tending to develop her own pattern.

What is abnormal bleeding?

Unusual vaginal bleeding, such as between periods or after sex, may be a sign of an infection or another problem. Some of these can be serious. For example, bleeding during pregnancy is serious and may indicate that you might lose the baby. Abnormal bleeding may also cause problems later in life if it is not treated.

If you are experiencing abnormal bleeding, you may have the following symptoms:

-excessively heavy periods (with a lot of blood and over more than just a couple of days) needing double pads or a pad and a tampon
-clotted blood (blood in thick clumps)
-irregular and unpredictable bleeding (happens all of a sudden and not at the expected time of the next period)
-bleeding between periods (including spotting of small amounts of blood)
-bleeding after sex.

Common causes of abnormal bleeding include:

-a sexually transmissible infection, such as chlamydia or gonorrhoea
-a uterine fibroid (a muscular growth in the wall of the uterus)
-a hormonal disturbance.

What to do

For advice, see your local doctor, family planning clinic or sexual health clinic.

[quote author=irun-obo] [/quote]Wetin? Abeg leave me joor. I hate it when you guys hate this guy to your bones... anything he does is bad for where una dey... Nawa even when he's making and creating giant strides... before una go say I dey support am. I'm an igbo guy, my native name is ndubuisi... Abu'm nwa afo owerri. so you guys won't bring that una tribal ish here....

[quote author=irun-obo]FORMERLY IT WAS KOKO PHONE WHICH WAS DEAD ON ARRIVAL. NOW KOKO GAARI WHICH TO ME CAN NEVER OUTSELL THE LEGENDARY GAARI IJEBU

MAY BE HE SHOULD TRY KOKO BITTER LEAF AND KOKO PALM OIL. WACK CONCEPT FROM A WACK MUSICIAN. [/quote]Are you a sadist or what? Look at who's calling someone wack... abeg make person hear word joor...

Straight from the Lee temple!!! Nice bangalee!!!

The koko master himself d'banj a.k.a skibanj, a.k.a banger Lee is the boss!!!

- -

Mc Power: hmmmmm...i will rather speechless in this mata
bt if medic is anyfin to go by,then i fink dey shud just wif doc advise n stay away frm compoundin der issues
God will give us wiosdom if we sincerely crave foe it

What did u write? You really need the healing water sef!!! Smh!!!!

danbrowndmf: Yeap MI pass am,cus MI stil gt storyline pass am MI na poetry,go listern EPIC,i also have sarkodie album on ma list MI is better dou sarkodie is Good dou,MI cnt sing a song wifout a story,do sarkodie do same,buh smtymes he fell out of story line,d only tin im gt pass MI na im flavour,cus even if u knw dy understnd sarkodie u go jus stil dy enjoy him rap...apart from der every other thing MI pass am,MI the 1st nigga to brng hip-hop nd high-life together.on a single track,bros MI na d best thing to happen to hip-hop for africa as a whole,dou sarkodie is good dou

I feel like clapping for u, u nailed it.

M.I passes subliminal rhymes into your brain, sakodie passes jagons..

MORN DEW: Comparing MI with sarkodie ar u trying to insult MI. Pls pls pls

Ask am

[quote author=Mynd_44]Is this a joke? Do you compare death with sickness? You should compare Sakordie with vector(and vec still wins) not MI[/quote]Precise and Onpoint!!!

We go beg una before una go carry this thread to front page? Nawa oooo

airmark: Reminisce tried on this album. But Olamide's BGEL still edged him.

@Ikelvin, that Zoro dude gat game. I like that 042 song though i did nt understand most of his lines. He should look for better record label and with collabo with a rave of the moment in Lagos he may blow more than phyno soonest.

Yeah bro, he's signed under wizboyy's No Time records but he needs a better record label