₦airaland Forum

temitope27:
How old are you

I'm 17

it's been a year now, since I finished my secondary school.
little did I know that life had a different plan for me.

I've always lived in Port Harcourt, with my Mother and Sisters, I am the only son and the third child of my mother. I was raised by her alone. she's my world, she's the only thing in this life that keeps me going.
Things were not so rossy for us, I'm sure you get the picture, A single Mom with five children. it's a long story.

2018 was the day I left my mom, I was only 13 years then when I left Port Harcourt to Anambra State. I was to live with an elderly woman whose children all lived in the United States. my Mom accepted, when the daughter of the elderly woman told her, that she wants me to live and help her mother in the farm.

You know what, I'm just going to skip the whole process, it's been a long four years of suffering for me.
I feel my eyes getting wet already.

Now I live with my Mother's elder brother, and I work for him in his Saloon, but I don't like him and the environment.
I want to leave, I don't know where to go, I can't go back to my mother in Port Harcourt.
I have a friend whom I met in my Uncle's Saloon where I work.
I explained things to him, and he understood, and said I can come live with him in his house. but I'm feeling sketchy about this because the said guy, is a fraudsters.

I don't want to move in that direction, but I feel like I don't have a choice anymore.
I just want to be able to provide for my family, I want to get my sisters through school and take good care of my mother.

Now my Uncle feels like I am being wicked leaving his Saloon, because he can't barb, and he has a different job, so he only opened the shop as an investment.

I'm tired, I can't figure out what I'm doing with my life.
I don't even have a single savings, and it's just bleeped up. I'm depressed and frustrated.

I want to go somewhere far, where no one will know what I'm up to, or what I do with my life.

I've not been a good boy lately, because, when I cut people's hair, i don't give my Uncle all the money, sometimes i keep some to myself.
I feel guilty about it. but I can't help myself.

I am just confused.

I mean what is this life even about?



....




Suicide is becoming an option, because I can't find a reason to live anymore.
I love my Mom,. she's all to me, but I'm sure she'll be fine, with me gone.

I mean, I can't even remember the last time I smiled.