₦airaland Forum

mine was NOW,
im having one rite now,

my gurl just broke me up 12 days ago, she thought i was into her body only coz ive been eager into heavy physical body contact with her, (not sex), and when she rejected that, i questioned her whether she loves me or likes me, she got really sad and disappointed doubting her like that, and i said is it possible if we go out again, and she said it will be different coz, i dont really trust u anymore, and the trust ill give to u will be not bigger than our last time,

oh it hurts me so much knowing that im the one that breaks the relationship, right now im trying to get her back, hope she wants me back also,

hmm, i deny this principle of my girlfrend, "not being touched by any man until married" and i took the principle of her really lightly, i ended up losing her, i love her so much but shes thinking that im into her body, not love, i shudnt have force her to let me touch her, still regret it until now, realised how wrong i was,

hmmm i thought so too,
but she seem to be waiting for it,

well we broke up already, too late i think,

hmm its not about touching her hands or anything, i mean touching her breast or other stuff, she doesnt want it, she said noone will touch me, only my husband will, means after getting married,

anyway we broke up already, then i realised maybe i was forcing upon her to let me touch her body, i really regret losing her, i mean breaking up this way, i think this is just not right, im planning to get her back, i said ill chase u again in 2 weeks, wat do u guys think, ?

no not that stubborness im talking about, of course we quarrel about other things and there are some things where i should get mad and shes the one who got mad, strange isnt it?

im 20 and shes 21, i love her so much but shes been like so stubborn, maybe i shudnt be forcing her to do that, ?

eveseh, i thought that too, i dont know if tats true or not,
until now to the people i tell this story, most of them said that im wrong, only u eveseh understand wat i mean, thanks T_T

so ur saying that i dont have to be so persistent, ?
the time will come when she thinks shes ready, ?

well i love her not bcoz of her body,
everytime we did it she didnt comment anything,
only until yesterday she really put this problem into a big one,
am i wrong, ?

okay,
i have this problem with my girl,
i wanted to have, not sex, but just a physical contact thingy but she doesnt want to,
we dated for like 5 months and these 5 months we keep arguing about it, about how i really want it and she doesnt, we still did it tho, everytime we meet,
recently this problem got bigger, this time she keeps avoiding the topic and when i started touching the topic, we got into a quarrel again,

is it wrong for me to touch my girl? is it wrong for a couple to just touch each other, ?
i don't see this problem is a big deal for most couples, but why does this problem post a big deal in my relationship, ? can someone answer, ?

im a chinese and so is my girl for your info,

well we've been dating for nearly 5 months,
and i felt that its time that her dad knows our relationship,
but she keeps avoiding the topic when i was talking to her about tat, she said that she'll tell soon, but she never did,
well i saw her father once or twice, and he looks like the strict type,
im a chinese, and its our custom to introduce our gf/bf to their parents, bring them to our house and bla3,

i dont really mind if she can go out with me freely even if her father dont know me,
the problem is, i felt that i have limited of time when we're dating, like we have to get back at around 10:30 (the latest) so that her father wont get mad and got suspicious,
and we cant go out for like 3 consecutive days coz her father doesnt like her daughter going out on weekdays, i mean, for gods sake shes 21, isnt a gurl around that age supposed to be given a mature thought by her parents that shes an adult and not be tied by a rope by her dad, ?

i really feel that by telling her dad that we've dated, her father would give us more time together when we're dating, and we cud go out easier, without thinking that her dad will get angry or somthing,

so guys, wat about ur opinion about my story, ? T_T

so, shud i just wait for her till she succeed in her career or push her into marriage, ?
well im not that rush in marriage, we still gotta long way to go,
But still, knowing her point of view of prioritizing career than marriage hurts me,

Maxflame:
Thats not a bad thing, what does she do exactly? She might just be trying to cover up a complex. Or mybe she's a Geek! Can i have her number? What course are you studying? I can tell you ways to get yourself more busy than she is and watch reverse psychology at play.

we are medic students, im 20 dis year and PLEASE, TELL ME how to get myself more busy than her,
i feel like im relaxing too much, seeing her so busy,

nicetohave:
If my girlfriend loves her job more than me, id drop her, its not about spending more time at her work its about how she sees herself and you in the relationship.

hmm i really dont want to let her go and so does she,
btw she and me are medic students,
im a man who just go with the flow, when the situation comes, then ill act accordingly,
but shes different, shes planning so far ahead, shes definitely not a geek, -.- but shes planning wat to do when she graduates,

my fren advised me to keep the relationship if i can, but if i couldnt stand it anymore, he said "you might as well break up, " T_T

Seun:
Such a girl is best referred to as "smart". When you finally dump her - yes, you will - she will not fall apart since she has other pursuits in her life that are arguably more important than ephemeral boyfriend/girlfriend relationships. It's a positive quality. Maybe she's a finance minister in the making?

Shes definitely aiming high for her career, she wanted to work hard so that the money her father had spent for her for college doesnt go to waste, its really hard for me if shes really focusing on her career, i love her and i really dont want this problem to disturb our relationship,

Seun:
The basic problem is that our young man doesn't like her lifestyle. Therefore they should separate peacefully and maybe when next they meet she will be in a position to offer him a lucrative job.

But under no circumstances should he try to discourage or change her because such girls are rare and it's not good to deprive Nigeria of what she's going to achieve if encouraged. if you can't keep up, drop out - no shame in that.

well yea its not like i dont like her lifestyle, but she said y didnt u support me instead of discouraging me, she said it like that and it kinda struck me hard, is that really the thing i shud be doing, ?

see i got myself a busy girlfriend,
she got set in all kind of organization works in my uni,
and i felt that i got so left behind,
seeing her so busy and working that hard, i feel that its hard for me to keep up with her,
she knows how to do this and that and i think that i shud be able to do the things that she can do but i dont know how,
seeing her taking EXTRA work that she doesnt actually has to take makes me wonder why is she so willing to get so busy when she doesnt has to,

Also, she prioritize her carrier than marriage,
she wanted to give back the efforts that her father gave her by supporting her financialy till uni,
when shes busy shes like a totally different person, focusing on her work all the time,
tell me guys, wat shud i do to get rid of this feeling? the feeling of getting so left behind,

well my gurl is a year older.. and she still behaves like a kid lol..
doesnt matter as long as u two can get along with each other well ya.. XD

well it kinda struck me hard when my gf chooses her family as her no 1.. and me as no 2..
i think its normal but somewhere in my heart it hurts..
so boys and gurls.. wat about u guys?

operation successful... XD
thanks guys... really... thanks alot..><

waw layi... ur an expert ya..><
those r some great tips...
thanks alot guys.. ill be trying those 'techniques' tonite
wish me luck...

well yea i think tats lame of me for not having any topic to talk about.. T_T
anyway she got pretty mad yesterday coz i keep telling her to talk.. to find a topic..

im 20..

see yesterday we talked on the phone and i keep asking her to speak coz i cant think up of any topic..
and my gf got made coz she was like being ordered to talk.. and whenever i keep asking further questions such as 'why' to a topic, she said im in too deep to the matter..
and we ended up quarelling..

so guys.. am i wrong to keep asking her to talk? and wat wud u guys talk about when ur on the phone with ur gf/bf..?

thanks a lot hot-angel...
good advice.. T_T

well its not giving me headache..
just giving me some deep thoughts so that i can choose the right one...
but still.. how would u guys think? if u were me... XD

Future Doctors Help Me

well im a medical student as well..
ive been thinking..
will i become a doctor..? coz doctors either take or give life to a person..
and im afraid to take the risk..
ive been wondering.. are doctors successful in their careers..?
well its not that i hate blood or somthing..
its just that i don't know what course i want to take when i become a doctor..
either dermatologist, cardiologist, obstetrician, or something else..
what about u guys.. i mean other medical students..

see this is wat ive been thinking lately..
both me and my gurl are students in the same course of profession...
ive been thinking what if i, by any chance, failed in my career..
well for girls i know u can depend on your guys if u dont not succeed..
u wud just think 'im a gurl, its alrite if i fail.. my bf/husband can do it for me..'
but wat happens if us guys are the one thats failing..? and u gurls are the ones that succeeding..
how wud u gurls feel if u make more munny than ur bf/husband..
Girls.. pls answer this one.. i need ur opinion..

im worried about my work, my own success..
im worried that i might be the one losing to my gurl..
shes definitely a hard worker and shes definitely smarter than me..
my confidence just went away when she told me about her plans for her career..
i myself admit that i have not think that long for my own career..
so guys.. pls tell me about ur opinion..
how would u feel if ur gurl is more successful than u..?
and i mean only in career..

Thanks..

James.. just be urself men..
i too once considered myself unattractive..
i tried to be myself and be4 i knew it..
my fren told me that my juniors were all over me.. (not bragging )
either way.. just be urself.. dont think urself as UGLY or sowatever..
try to be more confident in urself..

michelin89:
did you say you are from an Asian country?? i think this explains it all and it could explain it better if you tell us the country you are from!

im from indonesia.. im chinese tho.. not muslim..
sbm is definitely taboo in indonesia.. especially among us chinese.. ><
so ill take sbm out of ma mind.. just want a kiss.. thats all..

Oracle:
IS IT THAT NECESSARY?
MUST U KISS HER?
CANT U DO WITHOUT A KISS?

yep i definitely can do it without a kiss... but.. u know theres always somthin missing in a relationship without a kiss.. T_T