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 Christianity Etc › Re: 15 Type Of Pastors You Will Meet in Church by kingcomet(m): 7:22am On Jun 05, 2016 |
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| Christianity Etc › Life Of A Typical Nigerian Teenage Christian by kingcomet(op): 7:18am On Jun 05, 2016 |
Life of a Nigerian Teenage Christian Scene 1 My friend Emperor came to my place yesterday and asked if I would go to church on Sunday. I replied with the affirmative because I was keen on going to church after being absent in church since January. EMPEROR: Comet Howfar na, shebi we go enter church tomorrow? ME: Yeah, I suppose enter o, I never enter church this year and I know say God go dey vex gan. EMPEROR: You suppose enter, you suppose enter, na wetin you dey talk everytime but finally you no go come enter again. Why your life dey like this sef? ME: (smiling) No worry we go enter, just prepare come make we go together. EMPEROR: No wahala na, I go show tomorrow. Scene 2 10AM, Sunday morning. ME: Presido howfa na? PRESIDO: I dey o, you no go church today? ME: I go go second service by 12. You Nko? PRESIDO: Nna eh, my clothes are rumpled, you know say light no dey. ME: Same story every Sunday Oga Presido. Nawa for you oh PRESIDO: So nobody for this hostel go church? Chai (both laughing as Emperor hurriedly walks in) EMPEROR: Oboy nawa for you oh you never prepare? ME: Ah Ah, I no know say you mean am say you wan go church. EMPEROR: Go prepare jor make we go. ME: See guy, I no get change for offering, na only 100# I hold. EMPEROR: NO worry e go do, just prepare make we dey go first. SCENE 3 In the church (Sitting) EMPEROR: Chai, see fine fine girls ME: Even the the ushers sef dress like models. So this kind church dey na em I come dey miss church since eh? EMPEROR: jesus, see that girl dress like say na party em go, why person go wear bangle for leg come church? Chai, some people can dress to kill. Pastor: Offering time! Bring out something tangible that you wanna give to the Lord. ME: Emperor na 20 box remain for my money after calculating transport oh but I go put am like that. Emperor: Me too oh, I go put am like that. ME: Ok na. EMPEROR: Oboy, their offering box dey transparent, how I go take put 20 box there na. Chai I don cast. i go put 50 box instead we go trek go house. ME: Na you sabi oh. Me na 20# I dey put there. (After the offering) EMPEROR: Comet I for put that 20 box o, no body been dey look sef. Now we go come trek go back house. Phew. (After the Service) ME: How many numbers you collect na? EMPEROR: Just four oh, this church make sense die, the girls na confirm. ME: So how today go be na? EMPEROR: There is a birthday party coming up later this evening ME: Oya na, I go arrange the girls, you go arrange weed. EMPEROR: No shit na. First make go see those new catch, to see if we go collect na. ME: (laughing) So after going to church you still wan collect eh, dis guy. Chia, Christians of nowadays. Oya na Make we dey go na. |
| Education › Re: 16 Pictures Some Students Playing Bet9ja Virtual Soccer Can Relate To by kingcomet(m): 7:21am On Jun 04, 2016 |
nice |
| Romance › Re: Five Funny Styles Nigerian Guys Use To Toast A Woman(find Yours) by kingcomet(m): 12:57pm On May 30, 2016 |
curring |
| Celebrities › Re: 7 Artistes That Are Not Making Money From The Music Industry by kingcomet(m): 9:41pm On May 26, 2016 |
who is your daddy? |
| Business › Re: Naira Depreciates Further At Parallel Market- ( pic) by kingcomet(m): 5:54am On Oct 06, 2015 |
alright |
| Science/Technology › Re: How Tears Look Like Under A Microscope by kingcomet(op): 6:37am On Jul 24, 2015 |
Cy4praise:Some guys dey cry of heartbreak too |
| Science/Technology › Re: How Tears Look Like Under A Microscope by kingcomet(op): 10:40pm On Jul 23, 2015 |
DharmyYinks:If you aint gonna believe it, get a microscope and do it yourself. |
| Science/Technology › Re: How Tears Look Like Under A Microscope by kingcomet(op): 10:38pm On Jul 23, 2015 |
DharmyYinks:If you aint gonna believe it, get a microscope and do it yourself. |
| Science/Technology › How Tears Look Like Under A Microscope by kingcomet(op): 9:39pm On Jul 23, 2015*. Modified: 10:36pm On Jul 23, 2015 |
Have you ever wondered how tears Iook like under a microscope? . Dutch photographer Maurice Mikkers wasn’t sure so he put all kinds of tears under a microscope and composed an eye-opening photoseries to show us what tears look like from really close up. He asked a couple of friends to use their tears for this experiment. It revealed an unexpected beauty of these little salty water drops, that symbolize our strongest emotions.. . So think again before you waste your tears because of heartbreak. LoL. See the amazing pictures below. Source': www.wherecoolthingshappen.com/this-is-what-tears-look-like-under-a-microscope/ 1 Like
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| Politics › Re: Chad Seizes Suspected Boko Haram's Weapons Cache- PM News by kingcomet(m): 3:32am On Jul 04, 2015 |
good |
| Poems For Review › Re: A Nairalander's Dirge To His Aunt by kingcomet(op): 10:20pm On Jun 22, 2015 |
basille:thanks |
| Poems For Review › Re: A Nairalander's Dirge To His Aunt by kingcomet(op): 11:48am On Jun 17, 2015 |
Thank you |
| Poems For Review › A Nairalander's Dirge To His Aunt by kingcomet(op): 11:16am On Jun 17, 2015 |
My Other Mistress. Dirge To My Aunt On the bed of stones she lay, dark chants to see another day, oh a miracle she prayed, in a very strange language. Knocking on the door of loneliness, I could see her depart, opening the door of loneliness, I could see her depart. Like a leaf losing it's grip, falling, swaying side by side, other leaves watching, hoping and gnashing their teeth. Like a China this earth is, continuous movement but forever still, like a cave with no roof, you hide there but can still be seen. A wish forever not granted, a prayer forever not prayed, a song forever not sung, a woman forever remembered. In a lonely building you lay, with no joy or pain, I shall come see you there, where we meet to meet again. In loving memories of my sweet aunty, Anadu Florence Ngozi, who rested on the 22nd of February this year. Jee nke oma. |
| Politics › Re: Capital Oil Is Currently Selling Fuel At N100 Per Litre In Nnewi(photo) by kingcomet(m): 6:31pm On May 25, 2015 |
Other marketers should follow suit 1 Like |
| Education › Re: Tension In UNIZIK As SUG President Queries VC On Alleged Corruption by kingcomet(m): 9:09pm On May 13, 2015 |
solely behind Noble. God bless you |
| Politics › Re: Jega To Announce Presidential Election Results: Part 2 by kingcomet(m): 8:18pm On Mar 30, 2015 |
yes o. 1 Like |
| Business › Re: Th by kingcomet(m): 10:16am On Mar 29, 2015 |
blue. I mailed you. I wan follow chop o |
| Politics › Re: INEC's Voter Education - Election Accreditation And Voting Procedure by kingcomet(m): 8:51am On Mar 27, 2015 |
vote wisely |
| Christianity Etc › Re: How Righteous Must One Be To Receive The Holy Communion by kingcomet(op): 10:11pm On Mar 02, 2015 |
Thanks a lot. The priests always cries" Let all without sin come forth" I usually stay back but now I know better |
| Christianity Etc › How Righteous Must One Be To Receive The Holy Communion by kingcomet(op): 6:01pm On Mar 01, 2015 |
Answers o |
| Phones › Re: How Can I Hack Top Eleven Football Manager In Nigeria? by kingcomet(op): 6:52pm On Feb 28, 2015 |
OK O. I do run out of tokens when bidding. That is my major problem |
| Phones › How Can I Hack Top Eleven Football Manager In Nigeria? by kingcomet(op): 1:44pm On Feb 28, 2015 |
How can I get unlimited tokens? 2 Likes |
| Literature › The Gods Took Offense by kingcomet(op): 6:48pm On Jan 14, 2015 |
The tranquil movement of peace, Soaring when I was asleep, In my sleep I harvested wheats, With my workers thriving on sweat and grief, Apparently aware of their master’s flying whip. An embodiment of abundant grace, Crooked smiles scattered all over his face, Wealth as little as the sands on the earth’s surface, Flying on the ground, his steps no man can trace, Is he god or just made in god’s image? The gods are wise, so are we, The gods pervert justice, so do we, The gods are strong, so are we, Ruthless the gods are, so are we Roared the mooing voice which could be killed not, that of the king. Do not breathe the air meant for the ancestors, Do not covet the virgins meant for the ancestors, Do not speak the tongues meant for the ancestors, Thundered the wiggling mouthpiece of the ancestors, As he conveyed the less intimidating message of the ancestors. Oh Old man, Why were you blessed with sickness? Why do you steal my peace so frequent? Why do you love me with plenty hatred? What is the message you brought so urgent? The body of your wooden god I should cleanse? Remorseful laughter romanced the air, Its wailing tone the king refused to hear, sinking deep in the ocean of thoughts he could not bear, for death has kissed his heir, and all his sheep’s first alpha have been saluted by death. Sleeping bodies scattered like ridges in a farm, The flowing river has become so silent and calm, The mouthpiece of the gods found dangling on a tree, With his tongue staring at all men who cared to see, The king really had invited mayhem into the community. He lay peacefully on his ivory mat, Like a man no better than a dead rat, His skin as fresh as the mind of a rift raft, The community’s river gushing out from his swollen mouth, Now all he wished for was to head south. |
| Poems For Review › The Gods Took Offense by kingcomet(op): 8:36am On Jan 14, 2015 |
The tranquil movement of peace, Soaring when I was asleep, In my sleep I harvested wheats, With my workers thriving on sweat and grief, Apparently aware of their master’s flying whip. An embodiment of abundant grace, Crooked smiles scattered all over his face, Wealth as little as the sands on the earth’s surface, Flying on the ground, his steps no man can trace, Is he god or just made in god’s image? The gods are wise, so are we, The gods pervert justice, so do we, The gods are strong, so are we, Ruthless the gods are, so are we Roared the mooing voice which could be killed not, that of the king. Do not breathe the air meant for the ancestors, Do not covet the virgins meant for the ancestors, Do not speak the tongues meant for the ancestors, Thundered the wiggling mouthpiece of the ancestors, As he conveyed the less intimidating message of the ancestors. Oh Old man, Why were you blessed with sickness? Why do you steal my peace so frequent? Why do you love me with plenty hatred? What is the message you brought so urgent? The body of your wooden god I should cleanse? Remorseful laughter romanced the air, Its wailing tone the king refused to hear, sinking deep in the ocean of thoughts he could not bear, for death has kissed his heir, and all his sheep’s first alpha have been saluted by death. Sleeping bodies scattered like ridges in a farm, The flowing river has become so silent and calm, The mouthpiece of the gods found dangling on a tree, With his tongue staring at all men who cared to see, The king really had invited mayhem into the community. He lay peacefully on his ivory mat, Like a man no better than a dead rat, His skin as fresh as the mind of a rift raft, The community’s river gushing out from his swollen mouth, Now all he wished for was to head south. by kingcomet |
| Romance › Re: 5 Funny Ways Guys Embarrass Them Self In Front Of Ladies. by kingcomet(m): 10:28pm On Jan 11, 2015 |
Op. you too dey talk .minister of women affairs |
