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Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 9:27am On May 04, 2018

princfred:
If you respect a man just because he pays the bills i sorry for that man if something happens in his life and he cant pay. And i sorry for you if the man finds out that your respect is based only on the fact he pays the bills cuz he will bail before anything happens to him thay may affect him paying the bills. From the day he knows he will only see you as pay as you go not wife. And that is the reason why there are so many baby mamas.

It's conditional, the day that man experiences a network failure, i pity such a man. These people have programmed themselves to vacillate and function by the external factors of life and have not conditioned themselves on how to behave first internally,and then make the most out of any situations they find themselves

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 9:26am On May 04, 2018

Ladyhippolyta88:
Not really religious but a good bible student.You are right and I acknowledged that time would tell.Also know that views changes from time to time.Your perception and my perception cannot be the same even outside social media and we focus on on own realities going conservative may work for A and not for B like wise other ideologies theories and beliefs.I believe we should carve out visions for ourselves life itself is a risk so we may lose some and win some when we fail we should not lose hope but work harder to repeat such mistakes.Nice one.

But against these there are no rules, joy, peace, happiness, love, goodness, meekness, being nice, good, Godly, righteous has more gains, or rather has no downsides, i've never heard anyone dying from being good. Let's practice the habit of being good, we're the beneficiaries of our practice down the line my lady. As you lawyers say, i put it to you, we make ourselves of inestimable value when we practice these things and will attract , rather men will die to keep women with such qualities, take it to the bank and deposit it. cheesy

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 9:21am On May 04, 2018

LivingFree:
Men do the bolded and still expect to be respected.

It is earned by being respectful. You get what you give. If a man doesn't show me respect then I won't give him respect.

You want men respected on the grounds that he is a man! I can't do that. I don't respect for the sake of it. I don't do that with anyone! If a pensioner disrespects me I will tell then where to go! Respect is earned!

If a lady has to keep proving herself to earn love then she's not loved. It's also the case with respect. Listen my lady, if you have to beg me to date you, then we have a crisis at hand, in love, respect, loving, admiration all comes without conditions. Conditions strife happiness, peace, joy in relationships. Ask anyone that constantly make permutations sets rules, and reviews them like it's a KPI, they're never genuinely happy, cause happiness isn't meant to be hinged on rules,but upon liberty and expression of one's soul.

Respect and submissiveness isn't slavery or controlling a woman, feminism preaches it. I like to agree we disagree on this subject but it's cool, to each one according to his and her beliefs.

2 Likes

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 9:17am On May 04, 2018

princfred:
This is whole truth. The Bible never gave preconditions before a man earns respect. As long as man(in this case woman) uses sense differing from Bible they encounter problems. Marriage is not law. Thats why many lawuers lafies have priblem in marriage. If earning money and paying bills is the main reason to respect the man then divorce him once you can do all that since you wont have reasons to respect him anymore.

The pre-conditioning is from a combative mental posture that encapsulates arrogance, belligerence, contentiousness, needless argumentativeness , insolence and a lot more. They simply can't manage been successful and been of exceptional character at the same time.

All these negative attributes no matter how educated a lady maybe makes her worse than an educated soul, what is education without character refinement?

Cc: Chillychill

1 Like

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 9:16am On May 04, 2018

Ladyhippolyta88:
How did you know they were not happy?Well try meeting other set of people.As for your last statement I won't try to ascribe it to gender either way I haven't tasted the things you highlighted for now so I can't say although I am happy.

[b]There is a parable Jesus quoted, he says a man that listens to my words is like one that builds on a strong foundation, and without notice, the storms come, the winds come and it hits against it but it remains, the other man that doesn't listen is like one that builds on sand, and the storms and wind came, and mighty was it's fall, my dear young lady, in life, " our present state " isn't the reality but a passing phase, the reality is what the process forms through us and pushes us towards. In the house and wind analogy, the two houses looked good for a moment before storm came, it's storms and issues of life that tests our building materials after, not before we construct but after we have constructed, it's at this phase life reveals who was wrong and who was right, which is why everyone can shout on social media for a moment, but a day comes that reveals the quality of our convictions, and it's always in the future, not in the moment, there's time, reflect on what people say on social media even your friends and as life extends, watch whose beliefs and convictions created happiness and success down the line.

Bottomline, to test any notion in life and make it a theory, subject it to time, time will reveal what's right and waht's not.[/b]

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 9:08am On May 04, 2018

LivingFree:
If no bride price is paid, and the man is not older, and we earn the same income... then what?

I agree with you on your grounds... the woman should borderline worship the man who puts food in her belly and a roof over her head, but if she can meet those needs for herself then should she just stay single?

Respect is earned and it is mutual respect; in my world, anyway.

"Respect is earned " The same problem we've been talking about, if respect must be earned, must you marry? Why date or marry when you will withhold respect? Is the home a battle ground where wits and fists are to be used in a game of challenge? Some of you ladies just won't learn the easy way. We await the sad tales in days ahead. If on the flip-side, a man withholds love, financial responsibility and moral responsibility and sleeps around and tell you it must be earned listing conditions will you settle for such an unhealthy situation? Place the same standards on yourself. If respect must be earned, then it's not love, it's a battle ground

Cc: Chillychill

2 Likes

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 9:04am On May 04, 2018

Ladyhippolyta88:
No I don't plan on heading towards that direction in the first place.Your perception about female lawyers remains your opinion some women have had happy lives with that field and are doing well.And please don't try to pray for such next time I may not know what the future holds but as far as Hippolyta is concerned it is bright for he use your own experience to judge yourself we can't all agree on the same thing and time would tell but as of now I am happy and not on the path to sorrow.

I've come across over 50 single female professionals in the past 6 months, never met a happy one huh

It's almost as though our ladies can't handle power,success, fame and happiness in a healthy mix

1 Like

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 9:03am On May 04, 2018*

LivingFree:
If you can't respect a man without a basis for it, remain single, it's not by force to accept proposals.

I must remain single then... no be by force to marry. Wow!

Can you help me understand what a man's inner soul yearns for because most of us believe that most men are controlled by their sexual needs... we didn't even think he had a soul talk less of a yearning one

My bad, i feel like slapping the back of your palm for this one

Simply put, the process in life it takes a man to achieve his potential is a daunting one, by the time, he arrives, his soul just want to be pacified, nothing but peace. Because women exert lesser energy physically and psychological towards financial establishment, there's so much unused energy that is channeled into frustrating a man abusing him psychologically and otherwise, at this time, a man wants peace and rest, the woman on the other hand is insatiable and want a lot of things even she doesn't want. My lady, give a man peace and you've given 50% of what it takes to get a peaceful home.

2 Likes

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 8:53am On May 04, 2018

ruffDiamond:
I have one as friend whose son is almost a teen now..I discovered she a stubborn streak and unnecessarily argumentative and opinionated for a gal that's even uneducated,that's a lot of baggage.. I have lesent that the best thing about Ladies is their smile..any other thing is left for actual experience.. don't ever assume you know everything about them..like some men do...and finally 98% of them usually learn through the hard way before calming down

stubborn and unnecessarily argumentative and opinionated

they learn through the hard way before calming down

EOD

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 8:49am On May 04, 2018

chillychill:
Play mind games with me kee.." Won kere" I had said my mind Dere is nothing wrong with what I said everyone is entitled to their own opinions. Na Dere wahala b dat make dem Dey do 50_50 with Dere husband like u said "their end is certain and predictable ". Thanks

No emoji for hugs, i'm sad embarassed

1 Like

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 8:47am On May 04, 2018

Ladyhippolyta88:
Thanks for the advise and try not to paint all women lawyers as such not all aegis miserable or sorrowful it necessarily has nothing to do with one's career or a gender thing.And also channel your advise to yourself actions speak louder than words have a love day sir.

It will be better you take heed to the advice you read on this thread now that the day is young, you're on a path that only leads to sorrow down the line. I've met hundreds of unhappy women and all had the time to work on themselves while they were young but refused, i hope you'll listen. I won't take back my word about " female lawyers ", it's how it is. Even the ones that are not lawyers that are contentious are single and miserable not to talk about female lawyers

1 Like

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 8:42am On May 04, 2018

Adamummya:
the person you quoted is talking trash.....I have been there ..but what did I get in return after all submission ? twas beating even with pregnancy and after birthing, verbal abuse and emotional abuse , and in this case u expect me to remain with such abusive partner ?
I ran away ..now I a single mum..I've got nothing to be ashamed with

Madam, you did the right thing, some people don't deserve goodness, never pin the fault on yourself. Treat some people nicely, you end with psychological abuse, their normal is maltreatment, that's the situation they grew up in and that's what they pass down. I'm sorry my dear. But then, you can't disagree that in a normal scenario, good character from a lady, and respect and love for the wife produces a harmonious home.

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 8:38am On May 04, 2018

Ladyhippolyta88:
First of all don't try to bring in the words of an holybook in rational discussions.Secondly some good women have not gotten the reward you highlighted.Speak for yourself sir you are not every man and it all varies.I don't like to be have relationship with people where one person is doing it all be it giving or receiving so I prefer it goes both ways and we do it together it is called an egalitarian relationship.You earn what you get from me simple and short.

Look at such energetic release, typical of the kinds of women who are combative even when there's no fight. " rational discussions " atypical of a lawyer, no wonder most female lawyers remain miserable and sorrowful, you see everything through the mould that has formed in your mind in your career training. Like they say, if you see every problem as a nail, you're default response is to bring out the hammer. Learn how to communicative without needless posturing or being on a combative posture, better a word communicated with peace than through strife,you are a typical representative of the ladies this thread addresses

1 Like

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 8:34am On May 04, 2018

princfred:
Unfortunately, there are much more like that than not and is evidenced by high baby mama rate.Mostly after they become baby mamas, they get sense and.....CHANGE.

It's a sad tale of following complicated and sophisticated routes that only causes problem, pain and trauma and changing when it's too late. Character is better developed through adolescence and adulthood, which is long enough to produce good character, that no sane man can resist, we await their bitter tales as they age in the next few years

1 Like

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 8:23am On May 04, 2018

Ladyhippolyta88:
Same way two heads are better than one.A captain in a ship earns the post and is not given because of the gender he/she came with.

You just typified what many men have been saying on this thread with this part " A captain in a ship earns the post ". Why earned? Why settle in a relationship where you can't respect freely? You're posturing, and locked in combative mode even without a fight? This is the belligerent and contentious culture permeating the minds of many ladies that makes them remain single. Many of you folks just don't understand what a man's inner soul yearns for, i feel sorry for you.

No one licks honey and spits it out, the same way no sane man will dump a good lady,failed relationships can be grossly attributed to bad character of the female no matter what anyone says. Even God in his infinite wisdom through Solomon clearly states " A wise woman builds her home, but a foolish one tears it down " negative vibes and energy like the one that emanates from it should be earned will only push you into divorce. If you can't respect a man without a basis for it, remain single, it's not by force to accept proposals.

Chillychill, what do you think about this?

3 Likes

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 8:20am On May 04, 2018

princfred:
Exactly.
Many African ladies interpreted feminism as being belligerent and arrogant to men. Other factors are double dating for money and selfish and greedy attitude of many ladies.

You just said it all with this comment " Many African ladies interpreted feminism as being belligerent and arrogant to men. Other factors are double dating for money and selfish and greedy attitude of many ladies " It is extreme bad luck to cross paths with many of these kinds of ladies we see frolicking around thesedays

2 Likes

Politics › Re: Dino Melaye: Ozekhome Explains Why Judge Refused To Send Kogi Senator To Prison by kunleweb: 8:06am On May 04, 2018

This Dino epic is becoming something else

Family › Re: Why Do We Have A Lot Of Single Mothers? by kunleweb: 8:05am On May 04, 2018

chillychill:
You just said my mind... U'll see dem arguing with you now cos dey it's d true. Y would a female think she has equal rights with her husband

You spoke well all through the thread, don't let anyone play mind games with you that you hate your fellow ladies.God blessyou for speaking the truth and the parents that raised you, leave the others to turn their relationships/marriage to battle ground, their end is certain and predictable.

1 Like

Business › Re: I Want To Renew My International Passport, Help ! by kunleweb(op): 1:19am On May 04, 2018

deliciousgeh:
Pm me

I sent you an email

1 Like

Romance › Re: .. by kunleweb: 8:49pm On May 03, 2018

ranmoor:
Why not wait "in the marriage"? Why wait outside? Isn't that one-leg in, one leg out?

Sharp, yet strong sound bite. Perhaps " some " ladies chose wrongly and ended up in the newspaper clique,this is caused because they refused to settle for a guy before the fullness of his potential, they enter relationship with their eyes, and feet unstable, assuming that if he gets rich they'll marry, and incase if he doesn't blow, they'll move on, so they don't give their best to their relationships, they continue jumping froom one relationship to the next, before they know it, they become " newspapers " caused by their greed and selfish motives ( thinking they were wise ), it's the scheming that put many of these ladies into this situation and cause them to become stale, old and wasting.

Like you said, wait inside a marriage, marry a man with potential even before he blows and by complementing him, earn yourselves the title of loyal wives by supplementing his efforts in achieving his potentials. I believe the ones that become evening newspaper were not just greedy but didn't make the right choices or strategy to achieve their marriage objectives.

1 Like

Politics › Re: Fulani Herdsmen: Read The Reasons Why Gowon Is Silent. by kunleweb: 7:56pm On May 03, 2018

Wow

Romance › Re: What Is The Concept Of Love And Romance To The Nigerian Man? by kunleweb: 6:50pm On May 03, 2018

BlaqCoffee109:
What is the concept of Love and Romance to the Nigerian Man/woman especially in Marriage?
So I was on a thread where a Nigerian Husband came online to seek counsel to save his marriage and obviously stop him from looking outside (very brave and commendable to think a Nigerian Male will go the extra mile not to cheat even with readily available excuse to do that..hmmm); I humbly gave my own suggestion to help remedy his situation and some young folk insisted I had been watching too much romance ! To validate this question the more, look around you the spate of divorce, extra-marital affairs, cheating...hence this question.
Please mature folks let's talk about this...who knows,some marriage might be helped with some contributions and some miseducation of the expectations in marriage can be handled whatever the social trend to marriage

Romance › Re: .. by kunleweb: 6:49pm On May 03, 2018

Hanseel1:
I wonder how someone will be pressuring a grown ass lady..

If she has stayed with one of both guys, then she has a standard she could measure him against. If this party is cool, why search for a replacement? Was she out of a relationship before she hunted for a spare? It's whorish, that's a whoring spirit, a real lady chooses and sticks with her choice, whether, it's for good or worse. This one is confused and doesn't have standards she's consdiering for a lifetime.

Only she can pull herself out of the pit of confusion she threw herself into.

1 Like

Romance › Re: .. by kunleweb: 6:43pm On May 03, 2018

Hanseel1:
stop talking about the pressures thing..

She's pressuring you because you're allowing her to pressure you.
by the time you shout for her that a woman's life isn't all about marriage she's going to stop pressuring you .

Trust me

Don't let her bait you nor anyone, she's off age, she's only looking for whom to blame incase something happens down the line with whichever she chooses, she's off age, let her choose herself and deal with whatever's ahead. That she has a spare means she doesn't have genuine love for both guys, genuine love doesn't create room for replacements.

Romance › Re: .. by kunleweb: 6:29pm On May 03, 2018

Juliuss01:
he's not the type that is after my money, he spends and cared for me when he was still working at least I'm certain of that. I don't want to say this but then, i lived in an area where water was an issue to get, he bought kegs, and always arrange water to my house, even sometimes when I go to night shift, he will cook and bring food for me in the morning before he goes to work, he just have his way of knowing what I want at any point in time and he will get it @least to his capacity and he will never demand from me. I'm always happy to be with him. The issue is my mum and the guy that is ready, just want to know if i could go on my life and settle down with the guy that is ready even though i don't love him, not only that, he looks older than his age.

By spilling all these here, you just reduced your future to mere permutations, if you need a more educated guess, why not try professionals or counselors ?

Business › Re: I Want To Renew My International Passport, Help ! by kunleweb(op): 12:53pm On May 03, 2018

deliciousgeh:
Pm me

Right away, thanks

Romance › Re: .. by kunleweb: 12:46pm On May 03, 2018

ImaIma1:
Please do not let anyone put you under pressure to marry.

Who says you have to pick one of the two options?

There can be option C also.

You need love to marry and you also need money.

You don't love option A and marriage is probably the last thing on option B's mind because he doesn't even have a job yet.

And if you really loved option B the way you claim,you wouldn't have an option A.

You have said what truly matters my sister, whoever says she must marry between both huh

Romance › Re: .. by kunleweb: 12:39pm On May 03, 2018

Juliuss01:
Hello house, pls kindly assist.
I am a working class lady, I'm 25 years old but I'm confused about an issue. There are two guys proposing to me, one is financially ok and he has a good job, even his dad has been the one playing front for him before he gained the courage to propose to me, his dad has also been acting so nice, telling me to go get visa that we may travel out, that his son is also about to finish his house, we can move in after wedding.

The father even told his son to call my mum and now my mum is having interest in him but i don't love this guy no matter how much I try to, though he's financially ok. At a time I prayed over it but the revelation I saw was against the guy, I told his dad about the revelation because his dad will not stop pestring me but his dad said I should not be bothered about the dreams as a believer.

However, I love the other guy, he loves me more, always ready to do anything to see me happy, he's so nice, caring and love God but he has no JOB, not even an apartment of his own, though he's a graduate seeking for job, i have interest in him but my mum wants me to settle down so soon with the guy that is ready that I will later love him in the marriage.
What can i do pls. should wait for the guy I love or follow my mum’s advice.

God's counsel is our basic instincts. You know what to do but you are trying to push yourself to do the wrong thing. There's nothing love can not conquer, i'm on my knees pleading with you IJN, don't take this petty as your lifetime happiness is connected in all of this, never you marry someone whom you both do not love each other unequally, love can conquer a lot of circumstances, i'm kneeling down to beg you Nne, please marry that guy that is broke, if he's broke and has aspirations and dreams you consider realistic, please go for him, if he's broke, but if he doesn't have goals you feel will become big in the days ahead, please consider the rich guy, if he loves you, then you're a bit safe, since he's the one that loves more, but you must train your heart to love him even before marriage please. Speak to an anointed minister of God, don't take marriage jokingly, many women through marriage have died untimely please o Nne.

Romance › Re: My Fiancee Is Not Trustworthy, She Had Sex With Her Ex Boyfriend by kunleweb: 10:45pm On May 02, 2018

Confidant010:
I met my fiancee for 6months now and when I approached her she told me that she was in a relationship then, after telling her my intention she decided to quit with her ex and be my own.

This is an unrepentant wh0re, i advise you do the needful

14 Likes

Travel › Re: Cost Of A Nigeria International Passport by kunleweb: 2:20pm On May 02, 2018

Emmyk:
Thanks for the reply, I had all these, I was only making enquiry for my nephew.

So, we went to Gwags, I paid #25,500 for mine and my little nephew paid same amount too!

My sister didn't come with her ID card, so she couldn't stand in place as my Guarantor, I paid #1,000 to the officer for that.

The network was bad yesterday, I couldn't collect it, I went there this morning and collected for the two of us.

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