₦airaland Forum

iRepNaija1:
OP, please ignore the people who are insulting you. It's unfortunate but this woman was using you, just like people can use others. She was familiar with your financial situation and still pressured you to buy her things and used emotional blackmail (e.g. silent treatment, canceling plans last minute, comparing your relationship with that of her friends). It would have been better for you to end the relationship months ago. Going into a relationship based on familial or outside pressure should not come at the risk of your personal and financial well-being and happiness. The woman for you will understand your financial situation and you'll still be able to purchase her budget-friendly but thoughtful gifts.

In the future, please be extra discerning about women who are always asking you to buy them things, items you know are not in your budget. Please pay attention to how she reacts. Then it will easier to cut them loose if you need to end the relationship. Please don't this one experience with this selfish person turn you off to women entirely. Block that girl and never call her back. Good luck.

Thanks man

He chose violence

Ishilove:
You no get sense. I'm sorry if my words are harsh but I can't find any other words that can convey the weight of my irritation at this your post.

You are earning 35k in this deadly era of Covid + Buhari, yet you are telling a jobless person to be patient while you raise money to buy iPhone 11. Even those of us in the corporate world will have to do our accounting well before we think of buying an expensive phone, talkless of a jobless person.

Don't you have a plan for your life? When last did you buy an expensive item for your mum or female sibs (if you have any)? Instead of you to save a little out of the kobo and a half you're earning, you are pampering a leech. See, if you were my younger brother I will slap the taste out of your mouth so that the sense you have refused to get at this your old age will jump in by fire.

The girl in question is not crippled. Let her go and find work so she can buy all the expensive material things she yearns for.

I don get sense na I don move. I have savings stashed somewhere else that I can’t access and I will not access it except in life or dear situation or for emergency . That is my emergency fund and my emergency fund is not doing bad at all. Well I told her about this emergency fund whilst trying to explain the importance of her saving One day and that is the crux of the matter. She asked me to touch it for the phone. I might be stupid in love o but .. I will not touch my emergency fund for no damn girl . It is only money coming in I can touch. So yes I got plans for my life.

All these insults just for me.. nairalanders na wa �
first I am not preserving any girl. I don’t see sex as reward of dating. If she no wan do I no go force am.

2nd - yes I earn 35k it’s small I know thanks I will not talk to any woman again until I hit millions abi.

3rd - call it self worth or anything I am just a nice guy I guess ... it’s easy to sit on that keypad out there nd talk say this no fit be u... before meeting this clown Na wetin I dey talk. I just genuinely help people even my close make friends know that . How to set a boundary to how much help I can render without it affecting me is my issue.

MickzyDonald:
She wan use iphone that her father cant buy her ...
Anyway Congrats man, i know some simps might borrow the money but you didn't

I can’t borrow money, I hate the idea of borrowing money . I always try save no matter how little I earn.. so as not to put pressure on another person. But babe no send that iPhone she craves for the main goal is to show others she has arrived . What happened to using lesser phone.. I will be fine sha , few days time and little distraction . We move.

karkinase:
Sorry bro..this shit hurts. Nigerian ladies are the worst on planet earth no iota of single love from them, it's always what they will benefit.

Like I don’t understand .. it is sad why can’t we both add value to ourselves not trying to drain a person because you are dating.. I have met other non Nigerian girls and they don’t behave like this.

So I really don’t know who I have offended my love life Is a course I always fail. I have been seeing this girl since June 2020 but friends before then. She is been a financial burden to me as she doesn’t work, well in my own way I support her, my salary is actually 35k per month here in Abuja hoping it will increase but it didn’t.

Now I am not financially strong but I do my best, this girl borrows money from me claiming family issues But she doesn’t give me back. I give her to the extent that all my savings in PiggyVest turned to 0. She claims she is a virgin Nd no sex rule. I Obliged. And I haven’t cheated even though I was sexually active before I met her. So it is not because of sex I do what I do . Just wanted serious relationship cos I am getting old and pressure to marry is coming already.
Cut long story short she asked me to buy her iPhone 12 for her birthday in February. She made this request in November. I told her I honestly don’t have the money.. we argued I said ok let me give her my iPhone 7 she said nope that her friends are using iPhone 11 upward. Let me try buy iPhone 8 now she say no. She sha said she will settle for iPhone 11 Pro Max . Just to kill the argument I said ok and anytime she brings it up I tell her I am working on it. Deep down I knew I can not raise that money . My salary for 10 months will not even be able to buy the phone. She has been hopeful always saying when are we buying it. Anyways her birthday has passed. I wasn’t around as I traveled but now I am back on Tuesday she called telling me hope I am giving it to her on Sunday that she can’t wait to get it bla bla bla . She was excited . Had to tell her the truth that I don’t have the money yet and she should be patient. She just kept quiet on the phone. Babe what’s up? I asked . She said nothing I want to sleep and she cannot come over to my house this weekend again. Our conversation went from 100 to 0 real quick. I then texted her to calm down that I will try raise the money. Anyways like play like play this girl hasn’t read my message since Tuesday nor pick my calls. Like how can somebody be so insensitive. Ignoring all do times I have helped her financially but a freaking gadget that can be stolen is your problem. Even my salary no dey do me for a whole month . Men are only loved by what they can provide, Nd I do provide to this girl God knows. E pain me sha. Anyways just writing this to ease my pain.

gunners160:
I don't think u are actually concerned about the baby but you are still finding it hard to belief you got dumped by her.

my advice just let her be and forget the issue of whether the baby is yours or not. Get a new gf ; this will help in facilitating a healthy mind.

stop creating a mountain out of a hill

Obviously still finding it hard to believe. No problem

Hi so I will give as much details I can give I had a girlfriend and last year as at Late June 21-24 2019 We were together. She got pregnant.but she was not willing to keep it. I was of the opinion that she should keep it and I can take care of the kid but she said she wasn’t ready for a baby bla bla bla. She traveled to uK In July and did the abortion. We stopped talking as we started having issues .

But as at late July 29 she was still in UK. She came to Nigeria around August I soon started seeing her with another guy and she was posting him on social media. Fast forward to December 2019 she blocked me on all social media. I saw a pics of her and a baby Boy In a contact she forgot to block. Hence I created a fake Instagram account and followed her then I saw the baby boy she claim was born 6th may.

So I felT maybe she didn’t do the abortion and is in fact giving this man my child. But when I calculated with when she told me she got pregnant that is late June? The baby should be due in March.
I am not sure? so is there any chance this is my baby or she got pregnant again for another guy.
I am so pained right now. Like did she actually abort a baby to get pregnant the next month to another man cos he is loaded.�