₦airaland Forum

Shugavee:
So this is for the single ladies out there, please don't reduce your standards for any reason I was single for a while and i understand the fact that you just want to date anybody, like anyone who you feel cares or who shows you some kind of attention even if he aint ur type!! Funny enough those are the people that will use you n dump you, when you reduce your standard you open yourself to so many rubbish, so always keep your standard and if he doesn't possess the qualities you like not only physical qualities but mental too n u just go with it because "let me manage, let me just go into the relationship n stop being single and see how it goes", it's always bad most times!!(not always) its when you fix your mind on a particular goal that's when n how you meet a better person but when you're more focused on just dating for dating sake ur eye go open!! it's better you go for a guy that's your spec and your type and he dumps you, not you go for a riff raff, someone not worth it and he dumps you too put that on a scale!! No guy is perfect thats the lie we tell ourselves!! A guy has to be perfect 4 you, maybe not 100% but atleast 70%!!

this is interesting piece.

I'd like to know if you don't mind, on what basis do you gauge your standard?

Freeman50:
Jenny baby had said it all ..... wow
am surprised & happy that this is coming from a young pretty lady. You ain't looking bad, those eyes of yours are charming.


Mr letsdowhatever, you don't give out what you don't have. As a matter of fact, If you continue doing so, when will it end.

Just a crush you say? not even a soulmate, Pls come off it.

I still believe that any woman that cherishes you for what you are & not who you are would never ask you for a dine ( i.e. if she knows your current predicaments) no matter the condition she might have seen herself.

Just be stable in whatever you are doing, cause women loves success in all ramifications and see them dance to your tune.

Someone that earns way above an average Nigerian graduate can't be thought to be in a predicament

Meanwhile, Your forth paragraph caught my attention. That too cannot be trusted. Because guess what? What I am now is quite scarce so which average lady wouldn't "cherish" that? It's really not that hard to figure out you know. Alsoz this is Quite evidenced in the comparison between being broke and my present situation.

Thanks though

Ignored*

Thegeneralqueen:
Go back to the club where you belong and stop quoting me...... stingy guy

No, i won't trade words with you. have a nice day

Thegeneralqueen:
Oh lord this lie go fit kill person

You can't do it doesn't mean others can't you know

Yoshy:
You're definitely not the weird one out.

Perhaps you are right.

Belafonte:
Flesh and blood hath not revealed this to you, my friend.

Hahaha,

men who hear from gods huh?

alexialin:
Op the best you can help yourself with is this : stop dating for now and focus on building your financial reserve. Have self control on your feelings and emotions. Cut your girlfriend loose. You don't need her for now.
Just forget about love affairs. Focus on platonic relationships. Then later when u are strong money wise, u can then focus on having a meaningful relationship that will lead to marriage.

That's my two cents.

i got that. that's why am kinda single now.
Last year i had several but had to call it off because of the stress.

Thanks

mgtow:
Don't fvck small small girls in your area learn to keep your business private. Besides they can't take care of themselves so could very easily accidentally get pregnant and she could be so stewpid to point a finger at you. Who is going to believe your cries that you always used protection?

Pay as you go, is the way to go.

My biggest problem with women is their hypergamous nature and as such, I never go above and beyond for anyone. If pursuing a babe is going to stress me unduly financially, emotionally and pschologically, I cut my losses and run. Nigerian guys need to be better at doing a cost benefit analysis when it comes to women. If the cost of the undertaking is worth more than whatever benefit you feel might accrue to you, then it is not worth it. Most of the time what is the man's benefit? To thrust back and forth between the thighs of a woman before spilling forth seed. Some men pass through hoops and unspeakable ordeals (to the detriment of their own dignity and self respect) to achieve this aim which begs the question: Is it really worth it?

TIPS:

1. Never go for a girl if she shows zero interest in you. Go for the ones who "innocently and unassumingly" orbit around you. She messages you randomly, compliments you, calls you to just say hi, etc. We all have admirers but most guys are blind to green light or as I have come to discover lately, they don't even bother to decode the subtle signals that these ladies are passing because like me, they have decided that it's really not worth the stress.

2. If she calls you 3 to 4 times, make sure you only call her once or twice.

3. Never be the first one to say I love you. It makes you appear needy and clingy. If she says it reply. If she doesn't, don't bring it up.

4. If a woman tries to use her pvssy to exert some form of control over you, disqualify her immediately. For instance if she says "Hmm if you don't buy me that Peruvian hair I asked for you're not touching me tonight. You'll never get a piece of this." Reply with: "Who wants to touch a ugly baboon like you? Keep dreaming, mumu!" Always let her know she can't control or manipulate you by dangling her pvssy in front of you like a carrot. Invalidate her and put her in place. Wreck her self esteem. They know deep down that they are all hoes, and in their quiet moments they feel bad about it. Use this knowledge to your advantage..

5. If you are in a relationship and you notice her slipping away or changing in front of you, resist your impulses to MAN UP. What do I mean by manning up? Don't start giving her more attention or start calling her more or showering her with gifts, you will lose her faster because she is already on her way out and will see you as a beta male who can't get something better if or when she leaves. If you notice her slipping away - DO NOTHING. Act like you don't even notice. Preferably, stop making any effort altogether. JUST STOP. Assume a siddon-look disposition and she will think twice before leaving you. If she does, good riddance. What you are doing is valuing and respecting yourself above all else.



The media has brainwashed men in thinking they need to jump through hoops or pass through the jaws of the tiger to win the affection of a lady you love. The result of this is an overabundance of supplicating men and a bunch of females with an over-exaggerated and over-inflated sense of worth. Refuse to be part of the crowd. Stand up tall and proud, which is what a real man should be. You will discover that the women that want to be in your life will jump through hoops and do whatever it takes to be in your life. I'm speaking from experience.

I took the time to write this because the dating game is stacked against men and most times we end up the losers, holding the short end of the stick. However this phenomenon is not new. The dissatisfaction has spread from Asia down to the West, as more and more men are feeling more alienated and deciding altogether that relationships and marriage aren't worth it any more. And how can it be worth it? Over there the woman you have married and invested in can destroy your life on a whim by taking away almost everything you have ever worked for. The white girls aren't any better guys. No where is safe. In the near future women will begin to complain about a real scarcity of men and it will be obvious for all to see, especially as they grow older and options begin to dwindle. Shebi wen you don flash green light tire and nobody gree respond you go dey run go shiloh? Contunu!

The major problems of woman have always been their unrealistic expectations. Nothing is ever enough. Once you realize this you won't even stress yourself no more. Life is eazi mehn!

You made lots of good point.
cant emphasize it more.

Good points bro.

idu1:
All your loose girls are tall?


You mean you can't do 20 years old lady?

20 yrs is not a small girl

pocohantas:
It's a very simple sturv.
Tell her dating her has been very expensive...

Next time date a financially independent lady.
That's if you won't end up feeling emasculated.

I don't like your last statement though but am not offended. Thanks for contributing.

busybrains:
Omo I so love this thread. Everything una dey talk for here dey resonate wella with me. If say I get energy na to dey preach this tin everywhere make boys hear. In many ways, relationships/marriage isn't what it used to be, especially for men. I could write a thesis on this subject and I might.

Omo this thread na our beer parlor o. One bottle of alomo for you OP. When I settle down at the office I might share more on this subject.

The good thing is that we are still in the month of January so there is still plenty of time for guys to realign their orientation and plan accordingly before they wake up wondering where 2018 went. Time waits for no one.

2008 still feels like 2 years ago to me.

Time waits for no man true talk brother.

One needs to protect his interest first as that is paramount.
I dey office too but mine is not that strick

idu1:
Run away from broke and demanding leeches (girls).
Use your money to enrich and setup your life and marry a highly matured lady later.

My friend op what you need now fuvkmate. Look for smallie for your area and be fuvking her and be giving her small small change like 1k make e no pass 2k o I warn u Don't keep anyone say na your girlfriend.

fvck small small girls ke? Bro I don't do that. Once in a while I go clubbing and have sex with a loose girl and pay.
I always try to keep my private life private

From the numerous advice I got here which positively correlates with what I was thinking prior to the thread, I'll have to let her go gradually I can't kill myself. It's a burden staying single but it's a more burden being in a relationship at the wrong time or with the wrong person.

Fingers crossed.

Amadaz:
Lol... No be small thing bro. She says if I truly love her there should be no limit to what I can do for her. I've admitted to her I'll buy her a phone and a laptop but inside me I know I won't do any of those.

hahahaha if you truely Iove her hmmm that one strong oh.
It's not as though if you were broke she would stay.

Yoshy:
We all know the truth, when God finally starts giving you money, satan provides you a girlfriend.

To all Young men like me, unless it's a carefully defined relationship(dating to marry), with a girl that has something doing or something to offer, RUN, I repeat, RUN, don't waste your energy, time, emotions and money.

I sadly see some guys that will make little money, the next is to look for a GF, SMH.

you are right bro. The amount of attention can lead one to doom. this January man needs to set priorities right and plan for the future well.
This thread has made me see that am not the only weird one out. No time

Amadaz:
yiure so on point... My babe have been on my neck to get a phone for her after she lost her phone but on a second thought I said to myself....if I buy this phone she would use it to chat and connect with some dude she thinks is better than me and richer than me, so I decided to play her each time she talks about it. I prefer her sharing phones with her mum or siblings

phone ke. Lol that's much oh.
Except you do yahoo or you are super boxed up why would you buy a gf phone.

Y

donsimo:
White woman, that's a. No no for me oh. I used to dream and swear I would only marry a White woman. I respected the class, the lady like attitudes, the reserve. But that is a culture long passed, na the things I see and hear just make me shake my head. I would never consider it anymore, British girl's are loose like hell, sex doesn't even phase them.
American women, mostly golddiggers, without an ironclad prenuptial, don't try it.
I don't think Asiana marry blacks but even their men are complaining. Latinos may be good but the cheating would really bother me.

I think find one young pretty poor girl and build here to your specifically, she must be a virgin too oh, I that's the best approach, cause all this other girls are doing competition and aiming to be the next toke.

you have good points though. Watin man go do now, I really want peace in my mind all these girls drama and wahala I no sabi at all.

Where man go run go now

donsimo:
Am pregnant card abi, girls sha, you would think that being the emotional ones they should be more considerate but no, they do the most retarded things, I understand why in times gone a 40 year old woman would need a guardian, he might be 17 years old but as long a he's still a male his sense is complete.

I blamed myself having such girl in my life. Am seriously contemplating marrying a white rather than a black girl.

prodiG:
You talk true my brother.I'm currently passing through the same ordeal.Used to manage what i had comfortably before i met this girl.Since then she has bled my dry Looking for a way 2 dump without it being obvious.I no do again

club girls seem a better option really. Just pay and do what you want and move on. Rather than stress yourself.
It's crazy

Richie0974:
I thought I was the only one who has such issues with relationships.

not just you oh. We dey.

apharm:
that's a gold digger...

. many of us have been gold diggers at one point of our lives though. Lol

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Thanks

Rukkydelta:
Bros no kill yourself
Let babe know of your financial strength biko

I don't know why most ladies take relationship as a business venture they can derive income from

my dear let me wail as I like. When am done I'll be OK.
Things are hard but your specie thinks people pick money from trees and your specie forget we have future and even family too.
So selfish.

Aside from financial stress there's this girl I had last year. while I was writing my professional exam this girl just came from no where "am pregnant" long story short I failed that particular paper I had after that rough play. Just that paper.

Why would someone not have sense to that extent to be sure before telling me or to wait a few days after my exam.

You can imagine how insensitive and wrecking that was.

J

Adaomalight:
Lol....chill bro, I was referring to someone else.

OK #Chilling

Elzends:
Lol.. My situation was way worse than urs. She's still ur crush nd ur already complaining, when she upgrades to gf nko.
It's simple, learn to say no and ask yourself if she's worth what you spend on her.
A lot of young guys are wrecked by this belief of "ur to Cater for who ur dating"

I am seriously contemplating on being single for now. After all I would still have sex with some so why bother with responsibilities and emotional disturbance? It's too tasking. Worse comes to worse I'll go clubbing and bang a loose girl who wants little cash.

The future is just too scary not to plan well and focus. Gone are the days

johnbuck81:
u already know how it goes.

my brother the matter tire man. Wish I was like some bad guy who give less fvck about emotions but I get attached one way that's the bad thing. Well, thanks

Adaomalight:
Just imagine!


He is lucky tho

if you intended to refer to me what do you mean?

Jennifer15:
. I reserve my comments

what you wanna say?

johnbuck81:
dating broke and demanding girls is way too stressful...at the end of the day she'll leave you when she meets someone doing better.

just focus on making urself better.

been trying to do that. The economy is too bad to be wasteful. First things first

Jennifer15:
Most NL girls are properly trained to be self dependent. Them full here oo

I spent months viewing before joining NL so I know what am saying.