₦airaland Forum

Morning greetings to you my dearest e-family,

I am so excited this morning because the bestest thing happened on Saturday. Lifetitudes won the "Best New Blog" Award from the Nigerian Blog Awards. Results were announced on Saturday the 18th of April 2014 via twitter and i couldn't stop grinning. Can you dig it? We WON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A while ago when i started blogging as anonymous1803 i had no exact motive in mind. And although i put up stories that were real and sometimes, I still did not understand or even analyse the direction of the blog.

Then one Wednesday morning, i received an email from a lady who spoke about how the story i had posted the day before had inspired her. Apparently she had been at a crossroad and the post/the comments "you" posted had helped her make up her mind. It was at that moment that i realized what the blog was meant to be about.

Subsequently i decided that each post would contain a life lesson or more that were either visible or could be drawn out by your comments. Some days i am so "taught" that i maul over the comments picking out the day's lessons before going to sleep and other days i am so tickled by your comments that i fall asleep with a smile on my face.

The blog has changed me in so many ways and a classic example was my reaction to an offensive tweet i was tagged in on Saturday during the Nigerian Blog Awards E-Ceremony. My old self would have responded to the tweet with sarcastic words, but i realized that that reaction would be disgraceful for someone who hosts a blog that aims to inspire people. So i became a sheep and belted out sweet words.. I think the words were like water on the poster's "hot" body because he immediately apologized and promised to love me for life.

So in summary, by hosting this blog i have found an "elixir" of change and i hope you have too in some way.

Thank you very much for nominating, voting for the blog, visiting daily and sharing pieces of "you". Thank you for also voting for Naijasinglegirl who won in the Personal/Lifestyle and Best Humour Blog categories. I say a big congratulations to her.

Let us remember that by sending in our stories, sharing our thoughts or sharing the links to the posts, we might be helping someone somewhere make a better choice and at the end of the day we would potentially stopped one heart from breaking.

This poem summarizes the blog's journey for me.....

If I Can Stop One Heart From Breaking

If I can stop one heart from breaking,
I shall not live in vain;
If I can ease one life the aching,
Or cool one pain,
Or help one fainting robin
Unto his nest again,
I shall not live in vain.

poetry source

xoxoxxoxoxo...MFA

image source

Then you probably didn't listen to all the answers she gave because if you did you would have realized that she had those traits. Asking the questions alone does not guarantee that you will end up with the right person, being able to decipher hidden meanings from the answers the persons gives as well will go a long way in ensuring you marry the best person for you.

achinaboy:
but what if u aask all those millions of questions,and gets what u thought to be satisfactory answers,and finally says I do,and then after 1 or 2 kids,u finds out that ur confirmed partner is nothing but a fake,,once u left the house they he or she ends up grinding all ur neighbours and doing sall sorts of thing,,??

And then when you marry the baby girl or guy and find out they are not as normal as you thought, would love be able to dry your tears? Just asking......

achinaboy:
I don't have time to read all that ,but if u finally meet ur lost rib,i mean if u are really in love,,u will not have time for any question,other than baby or guy,will u marry me?

Really? Thanks for sparing some minutes to upload the rude picture

Slimzjoe:
Mcheew

lol

MzNelly:
How do you insert "What kind of sex do you like?"

Or "Do you like men or women?" into your conversation?

Makes sense. After a while the guy or girl will start expecting your conversation bullets. lol

Justfollowit:
You can not ask them at once

You insert them in your conversation

Thanks for your comment

[quote author=vjsmiles post=32756804][/quote]

Thanks for your comment

jhydebaba:
By the time you still dey clean ur papa's house at 40, u go trim the question down to only one.

Very valid questions.

One cant know it all. Thanks for the addition

adioolayi:
@Op too many questions you have up there... yea, they seem important to you and many readers.. But to me, you've omitted fundamental ones...like..
What's your Genotype and Blood Group
Have you had any surgical operations before...What type of operation?
Do you have any ailments requiring time to time drug intake?

Hello dearest ones,

A week ago while discussing the post on “worries of a single girl” Timi requested that we discuss questions to ask a potential/future husband. The questions can be flipped both ways and be used by guys as well. These information are essential and should be known before you say i-do. There’s a yoruba adage that says “he who asks for descriptions, never misses his way”. Would you want to miss your way? If not please ask away!

The questions she suggested are listed below:

What do you think the role of a wife is?
How do you feel about your wife’s rights in a home?
Will you insist on having every meal cooked from scratch, or will you be able to have convenience food or take-away on busy days?
Do you love to entertain guests in your home?
What do you expect from your spouse when your friends visit?
To the best of your understanding, are you able to have children? ( this cracked me up )
Are there household responsibilities you believe to be the sole domain of a man or a woman?
Why do you believe this?
Do you believe that marriages are stronger if a woman defers to her husband in most areas?
Do you need to feel either in control or taken care of?
Do you believe that roles in your family should be filled by the person best equipped for the job, even if it is an unconventional arrangement?
Additional questions to be asked as preached By Pastor Creflo Dollar

Whats your motive for asking me out?
What do you when you get mad?
Have you ever beaten any one up?
Do you have a job?
Where do you work?
How much money do you make?
Do you have a bank account?
Is it funded?
What percentage of your salary do you save?
Do you have a house? Or do you live with your parents?
If you live with your parents what amenities do you help them with?
What do you like to eat?
Do you plan on looking this good all your life?
How do you want to maintain your outlook? Or do you intend on adding weight?
How many children do you want to have?
Do you have insurance?
How do you look without your make up? Can you please not put on some tomorrow, i need to see the real you.
Is the hair on your head yours? What does your natural hair look like? I need to see.
Are you in debt?
Are those your natural eyelashes? If no do you ever remove them? I need to see you without them.
Do you believe in taking showers at night? Whats your level of cleanliness? What is your relationship with soap and water?
Are you attracted to men or women?
Are you trying to marry me because you are hiding something?
What are you hidden secrets?
Did your dad and mum commit adultery? I need to know.
Do you have kids?
What kind of sex do you like?
And some i added:

Whats your opinion on how kids should be raised?
Whats your opinion on financial responsibility in the home?
Whats your opinion about gifts giving in marriage?
Whats your opinion about in-laws and marriage?
Whats your opinion about me?
What do you not like about me?
What do you like about me?
Are you a sports fanatic? Would you require me to become one?
Do you like games? How many hours a day must you play them?
Phew the list is long and endless. Do you have more to add, please share. Married readers please enlighten us on questions you asked or didn’t ask.

Also when do you feel is best to ask these questions? Too early will chase away prospectives, too late will mean you have entered a one-chance-bus. When is the best time to ask these questions?

xoxoxoxo…MFA

OH OH

Dannidom:
once i felt butterfly but now i feel spiders

LOL. I must be white then

justmag:
noo...only white ppl fall in love like this.

and hopefully you decdided u gotta keep this one

skiLLzTohSLick:
Hehehe,the 1st thing i thought when i saw her was **damn,i gotta hit diz one**

Awwww, so sweet

Ayowumie:
Well, i can remember cos it's not long ago. And the feeling? It's still very much alive.

Fear of what please?

edozie04:
The first feeling was actually fear

Lol @ white people ish... Is it only white people that fall in love?

justmag:
Meechewwww. ...white people ish even though i can relate.

Several years have passed after you met him and he’s become a “regular” person to have around. You joke, you fight, you play, and you strife. But do you remember how you felt when you just started talking to him?

Can you remember the little notes you used to write to her, or the never-ending midnight calls that used to make the both of you giggle so? Do you remember the excitement and the fervor you felt at the beginning?

It was for a reason and shouldn’t be for a season. Lets all spend some minutes today reflecting on the first feelings that nourished the love we now share with our significant others.

I love this quote for it reminds me of how i first felt…….

As he read, I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once. John Green, The Fault in Our Stars

xoxoxoxo..MFA

Originally posted on www.lifetitudes.com

Hmmm. That's another angle to this matter. If you dont mind, pls visit my blog and drop this comment. Thanks

Welepamilayo:
I know your friend might think the boss is her biggest problem but actually her husband is. Any man that respects his wife would know how much grieve this behavior would cause her. He wants to make money at all cost. She better get wise and get her matrimonial home together before the dabarus enter.

I totally agree with you. If he has stopped complaining and is not taking action then he has been converted

Mprex:
The lady should just brace up for this because obviously the husband is comfy with the overtures of his boss

In today’s society, everything and anything is fast becoming acceptable. The lines of normalcy are thinning out and everyone seems to be taking advantage of this. Even female bosses! Or how else does one explain a female boss repeatedly calling her male subordinate in the middle of the night?

A friend of mine was lamenting bitterly to me over the past weekend about how her husband’s boss seems to have become a third wheel in their marriage. The boss (code-named Lady-T) had resorted to engaging her husband in all sorts of activities which included:

Taking her to lunch (under the guise that she hated to eat alone).
Dropping documents for her at home after the close of work.
Picking up stuff from her house during the weekends for use at the office.
Accompanying her for outside town meetings and conferences.
Buying him gifts
The worse part (at least to my friend) was the nightly calls. She divulged that at least 3 times in a week, Lady T and her Husband would spend nothing less than 30 minutes on the phone, talking work gibberish interjected with chuckles. And every time she confronted her husband about his closeness with his boss, he would ask if she would prefer him to be jobless!

The issue started 6 months ago, and the possibility of her husband becoming jobless is starting to look rather appealing to my friend. At least, more appealing than the thought that her husband sleeping around with his boss.

She concluded her story by letting on that at the beginning of the Lady-T’s drama series, her husband used to get so upset at the personal errands and duties. But his irritation had metamorphosed to acceptance and now he considered his boss’s behaviour “normal”.

What can I do MFA, she asked with tears in her eyes. If it was in my “hey” days, I would have advised her to properly investigate the situation and ascertain if anything weird was going on and take quick action. You know what I mean when I say properly investigate abi? lol. Any ways being a repentant woman I had to ask her temper justice with mercy and lets take it to the Lifetitude House for proper dissecting.

So people, when is close, too close? When should the line be drawn with female bosses and bosses in general? What should a woman do if she suspects her man and his boss are fooling around?

xoxoxoxo….MFA. (i blog at www.lifetitudes.com)

Photo credit: dailymail

lol at lomantic

dechandel:
Just within 30minutes.. The two Lomantic friends were already spoon feeding each other..
Isoraii..

What about girls who had plenty older bros and male friends. This is learning by association

johnbuck81:
na u talk am o...bad sharp girls were once gud girls until dey learnt their lesson.

lol. Me ke? Nevers. Am a bad sharp girl.

johnbuck81:
i guess u've been played a couple of times by d playas.
i luv d story sha.

Ah ah, clap clap. What kind of evil strategy is this?

edozie04:
oya clap for yourself, u wnt 2 show dm ladies all our strategies

Standing in the banking hall wondering what had happened to good customer care, i noticed a good-looking man queue up behind me. He said hello and i responded with a shy hi. We quickly bonded over the nonchalant attitude of the bank’s staff and kept each other company until it was our turn to be attended to.

He signalled for me to wait for him and I happily obliged. You see, during the short conversation we had i had become mesmerised with him and his cute mannerisms. The way he talked, the way he carried himself, the way he looked at me, the way he made me feel, everything was just enticing.

Once he was done with his transaction, he offered to buy me lunch and I eagerly accepted because I wanted to get to know him more. Lunch was divine. We laughed over drinks and the conversation flowed like we had known each other for ages.

He pricked my senses in ways I never thought knew. Just seeing him created an awareness in my soul of possibilities that could abound from being with him. A beautiful life, beautiful children, cultured lifestyle, so many beautiful things.

We chatted for 3 hours over shared food. He fed me, I fed him and he tenderly wiped crumbs from the corner of my mouth all the while gazing into my eyes.

I was voting for him before he even campaigned. Honestly if my mother had walked by at that moment i would have ignored her. He begged me to spend more time with him and I readily accepted. He said his father owned the hotel next to the restaurant and we could spend some time in one of the lounges.

Funny thing I was too mesmerised to question him when instead of the lounge, he steered me to a room. We got in and he asked me to look into his eyes. He said he wanted me really badly and couldn’t wait. I just nodded and before i knew it, i was having the best sex of my life.

I couldn’t believe my luck when he turned and cuddled me tight. I sighed and thanked God for this unexpected but long-awaited blessing. After 30 minutes of cuddling and whispering sweet nothings, he excused himself to get his Ipad from his car. As he left, he blew me a kiss and I couldn’t help but giggle. Omo ti hit e. I got up and danced for 5 seconds, a good-looking, rich, sexy guy. Kai this bread has been surely buttered and this single girl was off the market.

All i could think of was a destination wedding……..

After 45 minutes of waiting for his return, i got worried and decided to search for my man. I approached the receptionist and before I could say anything she asked if I was ready to check out with a sly look on her face. I answered in the negative and informed her of my search for the guy I came in with.

She responded with a sarcastic smile and uttered words I couldn’t believe. “He left 40 minutes ago after he paid the bill”. Left to where I ask in shock? How will I know madam, she retorts and shakes her head at my apparent confusion.

Quietly and with a full complement of shame I make my way back to the room, pick my bag and head out of the hotel.

It dawns on me that I have been just been sexually used. Played and royally 419’ed in Lagos, and I feel sad and powerless to do anything. Hitching a bus to the mainland I wonder if i did anything to deserve the treatment meted out to me? All I wanted was love but instead I got played.****

Moral of the story: In the words of Lauren Hill, “don’t be a ho’ when you truly are a gem”. Refrain from giving yourself too quickly and cheaply to anyone. Most often than not nothing good ever comes from it. If he likes you that much he will put in effort to get to know you and not screw you immediately. Pardon my french. PS: the story is a work of fiction but there are so many ladies out there who mistake attraction and desire with love at first sight.

photo credit: www.funnyjunk.com
story originally posted on www.lifetitudes.com

Good men are rare!!!! God bless the good men.

While you are on this journey, please visit my blog www.lifetitudes.com and tell me what you really think.

harrysterol:
we will reach the destination

Pele. Keep being with him on it. You are in a one-chance bus.

harrysterol:
am with u on this too

Its alright jare . I realise that one should expect punches when venturing into the social sphere.

kallmemrB:
wow...seems my comment pissed u off. ..sorry op i was just telling the truth.. there are lots of fake bloggers on NL

I know you are, just cant wrap my head around it. If its true then lesson number one in relationships should be "always have food ready for your man if you dont want some violence"

bundur:
i am jst saying

How do we know if you are who you say you are and your very existence is not a lie?
check my blog www.lifetitudes.com its all about inspirational real life stories. I dont have to cook up stories just to get people to read, if its fiction i will state so!

Sunkyphil:
ao am i sure the story is not cooked up

We dont hate people who hate blog stories

Sunkyphil:
I HATE BLOG STORIES