I suspect he took a feminist olosho Bini witch for an all night romp.

She killed him while he slept and disappeared back to her coven which explains the locked door.


Moral of this story:
Never associate with a feminist.


*spits

iGISTMORE:

Peter Adedeji James

Na dem...

Bobrisky, Denrele and all their Afonja gay cronies can relocate there ASAP before we catch them.


Tonto Dikeh, Princess Shyngle and all other lesbian sextoys can however, remain here.
They are safe.
Anybody that discriminates against bisexual women will be killed even if it is my own mother.


Signed,

Dictator-in-Chief
Vaseline & XVideos Crew
Nairaland Chapter

Chenzee:
I seriously have a crush on this lady. I was told her birthday is very soon. While passing through the market earlier, I saw this nice looking set of pants on display in a shop, and am very sure they will size her. I wanted buying the pants for her, but am contemplating.
Do you think it will be nice and romantic to buy such a gift for someone I just met?
Do you think that would not cut off my chances of getting closer to her?

Buy the pant jare.

Don't listen to naysayers. They wish they were in your shoes.

NnennaG6:

Because it’s true.

Hotkinkyjo's asshole can take a baseball bat is also true.

Should I believe in it?

fatdon2:

What do I do to make my marriage work?

Try anal.

Did they find traces of Afonja in his DNA because I really don't know his tribe.


*spits

The recent move of Super Eagles captain, John Mikel Obi to Championship side Middlesbrough is a painful reflection of the quality of our players.

It is worrying that the captain of our national team is only good enough for a second tier side. To add salt to the injury, it is even possible he will not be a regular starter for Middlesbrough. Mikel’s case is not peculiar either, almost all his team mates suffer a similar fate.

Before I go on, here’s a breakdown of Nigeria’s squad to the last World Cup and their current club sides to lend perspective.

Goal Keepers
Ikechukwu Ezenwa – Enyimba - Regular
Daniel Akpeyi – Chippa United - Regular
Francis Uzoho – Elche CF – Bit-part

Defenders
William Ekong – Udinese - Regular
Leon Balogun – Brighton & Hove Albion – Bit-part
Kenneth Omeruo – CD Leganes - Regular
Bryan Idowu – Lokomotiv Moscow – Bench warmer
Chidozie Awziem – Caykur Rizespor - Loan
Abdullahi Shehu – Bursaspor – Ball boy
Elderson Echiejile – Without club
Tyronne Ebuehi – Benfica - Injured

Midfielders
Mike John Obi – Middlesbrough – N/A
Ogenyi Onazi – Trabzonspor - Regular
John Ogu – Hapoel Beer Sheva - Regular
Wilfred Ndidi – Leicester - Regular
Oghenekaro Etebo – Stoke - Regular
Joel Obi – Chievo Verona – Bit part

Forwards
Odion Ighalo – Changchun Yatai - Regular
Ahmed Musa – Al Nassr - Regular
Victor Moses – Fenerbahce - Loan
Alex Iwobi – Arsenal – Bit part
Kelechi Iheanacho – Leicester – Bench warmer

Looking at the breakdown of Nigeria’s squad above, it is sad to note that Nigerian footballers play for either relegation threatened sides, clubs in mediocre leagues or second tier clubs. The ones that manage to sign for decent sides end up as bit-part players (Iwobi), bench warmers (like Iheanacho) or get loaned out to smaller clubs (like Omeruo, Moses).

Funny thing is, these names are the assured starters in the Nigeria squad. Only Wilfred Ndidi can boast of starting regularly for a decent club side (Leicester City) when fully fit. Abdullahi Shehu even had the nerve to be so bad that Bursaspor, a mid table Turkish side cannot find space for him on their bench!

Gone are the days when Nigerian footballers like West, Kanu, Agahowa, Finidi, Yakubu, Yobo, Enyeama, Martins & co featured regularly in the Champions League or Europa League (a sign of top level football).

It is not bad having a talent drought - it happens - Germany, Belgium, Netherlands, France have all suffered talent droughts immediately after their golden generations but adequate measures were taken to ensure that the upcoming generation could halt the rot. The result of these projects resulted in the mass production of world class talents that even find it hard to make it into their national teams due to stiff competition for places. The wonderkids of football today are found in German, Dutch, French & Spanish academies.

In Nigeria, however, the reverse is the case. Our academies and local club sides cannot boast of presentable players for our national team. In the build-up to the last World Cup, a few of them were tried and they offered little or nothing different from what their Europe-based team mates could (which isn’t much by the way).

Considering that the average level of football has fallen globally in the past ten years, it is embarrassing that our footballers cannot keep up with today’s top internationals. Yet football-mad Nigerians blinded by emotion always expect their country to win every tournament they participate in – including the World Cup – when in reality, the talent available is not fit to win a beach soccer tournament.

Needless to say, Nigeria has not won any major tournament in the last five years.




*spits