₦airaland Forum

PRESERVE YOUR CULTURE
Whatever is done in Europe or the
Americas MAY NOT be acceptable
in Africa.
A guy was watching an American
movie in which he saw a man
propose to a lady using ice-cream.
The man put a diamond ring into a
cup of ice-cream. The lady caught
it in her mouth, saw the ring and
happily accepted the man's
proposal.
The Nigerian guy decided to try it
with his South African girlfriend.
*Come see drama.*
He put the ring into a bowl of ice-
cream which he offered his very
hungry girlfriend.
*Hunger is a serious thing o.*
5 minutes later, the bowl was
empty. Both ice-cream and ring
have been swallowed.

wrong[quote author=T.ice]isn't it air??[/quote]it isnt o.do air travel by foot?

Riddles
I am found in the sea and on
land but cannot walk or
swim.
I travel by foot but I am
toeless.
No matter where I go, I'm
never far from home. What
Am I?

Annoying Questions Females Ask
And Suitable Answer!!
Q: Are U a player?
A : Yes I play For Liverpool
*do dey expect U 2 say yes?
Q: why do U wan't my Pin ??
A:i want to use it to burst balloon.
*wetin dem dey use BB pin do
again?
Q: Can U die 4 me?
A: My name is surely not Romeo.
*Let me die for you so you can
come to my burial with another
guy?
Q: My Bis will soon expire, what
am i going to do?
A: return the BB to the seller and
get a Nokia 3310
*You no know say dem dey do BIS
before you buy am?
Q: if I sleep over hope Nothing
funny will happen?
A: No, trust me we would just
perform night vigil
*Abeg park well
QHope U won't break my Heart?
A: if u don't put it at the edge of
the table...
*Your heart na Glass cup?
Q: can U take me out?
A: sorry are U in prison
*Make we start new prison break
season?
Q: pls come and pick me..?
like say she be beans
*Come enter Tray make i start.
Q: I think have missed my period..
A: then ask the class captain for
the next class!!
*Where you go when the period
dey on?

Annysat: helo nairalanders pls is dere any info abt oau 2nd batch admission list ?

welcom to nairaland!d oau secondlist wil b release sooner.


Buh i pray it nt d sooner our president dey say dz day nd d strike z 4month old.
Or dt of jesus.

Ur que simple pass abc

Vetolips: michaeltotti ans d above.. na u dy ask.for nxt question

Tuesday or wednesday sha

Vetolips: The day before the day before yesterday was 3 days after Saturday. What is it today?

next question plx

brake

peternonso: A motorcycle always has
a. Driver
b. Gear
c. Brakes
d. Wheels

next question plx

Fynestboi: coffin

and koboko,pankere also:8

Coffin

peternonso: d maker doesnt want it
d buyer doesnt use it
d user doesnt see it
wt is it?

next question plx

Chiamaka01: No, oh. I'll be there till we finally resume( you know that stallites haven't started second semester, right?). Cos' it looks like ASUU strike will linger on till next year.

na u ooo.

ehen

Chiamaka01: No, oh. We'll resume on the 12th of November.

buh wat if ur name z on d secund list?shey d 154k waste niyen abi what?

Chiamaka01: ^^^
Yes, oh. Michaeltotti, you are right.

tanx jawe.u neva go ur 4 d pd?abi ASUU affect u pple also?

If you've tried and have not won,
Never stop for trying;
All that's good and great is done
Just by patient trying.
Though young birds, in flying, fall,
Still their wings grow stronger,
And the next time they can keep
Up a little longer.
Though the sturdy oak has known
Many a wind that bowed her,
She has risen again and grown
Loftier and prouder.
If by easy work you beat,
Who the more will prize you?
Gaining victory from defeat,
That's the test that tries you

If actually the National conference
is aimed at consolidating Nigeria's
unity as being speculated, then it
should be able to address the
following questions:
1. Why more than 15 youth corps
members of Southern origin were
murdered in some parts of North
after 2011 presidential elections
simply because Buhari did not win
and nothing has been done about
it.
2. Why Southerners are not safe
living in some parts of North
while Northerners work freely
and do their businesses in the
South without being harmed.
3. Why a Southern christian is not
welcome freely in cities like Kano,
Maiduguri, Bauchi, etc while aliens
from Niger Republic, Lebanon,
Chad, who are muslims are
wholeheartedly welcome.
4. Why a small group of persons
who believe power belong to
them publicly said they will make
Nigeria ungovernable if they lose
the election and what they said
has being hurting Nigerians till
date.
5. Why in this period of 21st
century, terms like quota system,
federal character, educationally
disadvantaged states are still
enshrined in our constitution.
6. Why for more 20 years, Fulani
herdsmen have been maiming and
killing people in their communities
and the only thing federal govt
does is to deploy troops to such
areas when it happens but people
behind it are not brought to book.
7. Why in all govt Ministries,
Departments and agencies (MDAs),
more than 80% of the directors
and permanent secretaries are
either from North East or North
West.
7. Why someone who steals a cell
phone gets 15 years
imprisonment while our politcians
who steal and loot millions and
billions are either fined N1 million
naira or their cases remain in
court forever.
8. Why petroleum Resources of
the Niger Delta are being used to
develop Abuja to the envy of
other nations while the places
these resources are gotten remain
slumps and the indigenes
suffering.
8. Why there was nothing as
ASUU strike during the era of
Awolowo, Azikiwe and Ahmadu
Bello when we hard regional govt.
9. Why since GEJ became
president, Nigeria has never
experienced peace but
Northerners ruled peacefully.
10. Why 80% of oil blocks in the
Niger Delta are owned by
Northerners.
11. Why despite our petroleum
resources and money acruing
from it, Nigerians are still
suffering.
12. Why some states reject
biometric census that help to
solve census crisis in Nigeria and
correct the imbalance in revenue
sharing among states.
Where this conference is not able
to ask and address the above
questions, then it becomes a mere
political jamboree. The agitation
for self determination and break
up of Nigeria by mainly Southern
Nigeria groups will continue

c question of life

Fynestboi: are u dumb U asked question and i replied u what else

u cn b dumb.

Fynestboi: peevish

u gt prob o.wat concern peevish wit d joke nw?what irritating u?

My girlfriend Broke Up With
Me ;shee Said I act Childish:> I
took a Deep Breath & Calmed
Down.:| I Went to Their House:>
Pressed The DOOR BELL & Ran
away. Am I Childish?.

Fynestboi:

fynest what dd u see?hope u dint c anytyn?

emekakelvin: na my mummy oooo
Lover you called it!
A sincere lover cant do this ooo,rather she is in lust with you.

what if it RAPE?

IamDavid: I wanna see yo answer first

ma anwser is mum.bt mke i no dciev u,u wil b shock.u wunt know wu to attend to first.buh if na mhe,na mum awil attend to.Bleep lover.
Sumone dt let me to suck her breast widaot askin 4 iphone,android.bb porshe.shez wat dyin 4.buh girl frEND.Wt dd u c at d bck?no b end.she cn leav me if d lov z nt dia again.bt mum,cum rain,cum sunshine,she wil alws b dia 4 me.

Final anser:MUM OOO

papindinho: Baba keh........ #looks back only to see Michael twisting her(his) waist# O boy!! No be small tn o.

BTW, na thinking thinking and thinking tns o

her ni o.mako bami o.dnt let fynest crew catch me,

**Read and Comment
You came back from work feeling
tired, only to find someone
beating your MUM.
Out of anger you went in to get a
weapon.
On Reaching in ..You saw your
lover with another person on bed.
Question is : Who would you
attend to first?
(A) Mum
(B) Lover
Please be sincere in your
comments!!

emekakelvin: Say it's funny ni ? thank God you just laugh!
Flying out iS nt a bad option sha, but always remember dignity!
Dignity! dignity! dignity! oh dignity is better than riches that finish with time

i hear ma oga

Oluwatola5: Not on my life, i have got my reputation to protect. I wouldnt even be caught dead in bikini in public.

ahahaha.formin101

funny u!!

emekakelvin: Wetin 10million wan do 4 ur body? you walka naked 4 street,d nxt day they mannap (kidnap you) who wan tel d story?

dd u know d new law sha?any kidnapperz shud b sentence to death.i cn fly out wit d money gan

Amb Fitsaint: A man can still do dat with some styles but for a lady......... CAPITAL NO!

As for me oo, I can't practise dat *m*dn**s*

ahahahaha.fitsaint,wat of 30bn?even burna boy perform naked in shrine.so wu r u nt to?u sev b girl oo

Gud aftunun ma broda nd 6ta


If You Are Offered N10 Million
would you walk around your
street Naked For an Hour?
Comment Sincerely!!


For mhe o.awil walk nd play around.nd relocate oo:PTEN MILLION?dd u know ao many month martha wil spend in d jungle to av dt?

Oluwatola5: Today is Ilorin's convoc?

yes nw.today nd tomao.
Shud we attend tomao own togeda?

sighz.

Adedayo516: @All who replied my post, Thank you. No I am not a science student neither am I an arts student, am a commercial student. Got a B3 in english and economics, Credits in Account, Commerce, Biology, and Agricultural science. Then sadly, a D7 in math☹.

i leav dz to ma ogaz at d apex.thO.hard to say.dd u av geo or govt?

Viewing this topic: michaeltotti
(f), Olastep1(m), Miracy(f),
Chiamaka01(f), s1 and 2 guest(s)

i greet ma broda nd sister o.


Y z d trend(thread) dry like dz?
Where is tola,kjile,papinx?
Abi u pple go to unilorin convocation nih?