₦airaland Forum

He want's us to settle down.

I want to meet the family to guage their reaction.

If they don't like me, I will forget about it.

I have no clue what 'don't overdo things' means.

Do I take a gift?

I'm 34 and he is 24.

I do not look my age. In fact, I have to carry around ID to prove my age.

He says I look 25. The visual aspect really isn't a problem.

And his mum does not know how old I am.

I previously posted a question about whether a significant age gap can work in relationships where a woman is 10 years older than the man.

Many of you thought that that the relationship was doomed and his family would never accept me especially as my boyfriend is only son.

Well after telling my boyfriend that this relationship is unrealistic, he now wants me to meet his mother because he's convinced she'll love me just as he does and wants to prove to me that we can work things out.

Have you got any tips on what I should do and say when I meet her? For example, I know I have to bow but what do I call her? 'Mrs' or 'mum'.

I'm learning Yoruba. Should I greet her in her language to show I'm trying? Should I bring a gift? If yes, what?

I just don't want to embarass my boyfriend given that he has put so much faith in me despite all hurdles in our way.

I previously posted a question about whether a significant age gap can work in relationships where a woman is 10 years older than the man.

Many of you thought that that the relationship was doomed and his family would never accept me especially as my boyfriend is only son.

Well after telling my boyfriend that this relationship is unrealistic, he now wants me to meet his mother because he's convinced she'll love me just as he does and wants to prove to me that we can work things out.

Have you got any tips on what I should do and say when I meet her? For example, I know I have to bow but what do I call her? 'Mrs' or 'mum'.

I'm learning Yoruba. Should I greet her in her language to show I'm trying? Should I bring a gift? If yes, what?

I just don't want to embarass my boyfriend given that he has put so much faith in me despite all hurdles in our way.

Didn't need juju. Neither of us knew how old the other was initially.

Anyway many thanks for your comments and advice. Some more helpful than others. Pray for both of us.

Kind regards

In reply to the comment about marriage, I don't want to rush into anything that is why I'm asking whether it is doomed or whether it is worth the risk.

I genuinely care about him and do not want to create friction for him and his family.

We met when he was 19 and I was 30.

Please no juvenile responses.

I do not love him because he owns property. I own my own property. Love built on material wealth is shallow.

Just for the record we do not have to engage in illegal activity. We are both educated and qualified Chartered Surveyors. ie. we work in the property industry and have been lucky when there was a property boom in London before the recession.

His friends know about us already and he is already a sucessful businessman and has bought two houses.

Just want to know whether the relationship is already doomed or there might be a chance that we are accepted. What can I do to help his family to accept me.

I met my boyfriend 5 years ago and it was instant mutual attraction but I did not pursue it. Over the years we have remained in contact via phone, email and sporadically seen each other at events but because we were both in a relationship, we never met just the two of us. However, it was obvious to everyone that knew us that we both liked each other a lot.

Now, five years later, we are both single and have just started spending a lot of time together and getting to know each other properly. Despite my resistance to get involved with someone so young, It already feels comfortable and right. It is clear to both of us that we are both falling for each other deeply but there is a big problem.

There is a 11 year age gap between us. I am 34 and he has just turned 23. I know many will ask me why I am with a 'boy' and ask him what is he doing with 'Old argo' etc.

He is Yoruba and the only son for his mother and they have a very close relationship. I am from a Caribbean background, have no children and have a sucessful career. I do not look my age and in fact have to carry ID around with me to prove I'm older than I look. He is independent and has his own money so I do not believe that there is any financial motive.

The problem is that he seems to be burying his head in the sand when I try to speak to him about how his family might react to our relationship. He won't discuss it. I do not want his family to shun him because of me but I also don't want my heart broken by continuing with a relationship that is doomed. He is a close to a friend of mine that I have known for 15 years and he assures me that he is genuine but this friend also said that he has to show respect.

I'm just not sure whether to take a risk or accept that the relationship is doomed. I wish I could have faith that he would be able to stand up to his family but he is only 23 after all. I cannot expect him to act with the strenght of a 30 year-old when he is only 23.

Morayo

I met my boyfriend 5 years ago and it was instant mutual attraction but I did not pursue it. Over the years we have remained in contact via phone, email and sporadically seen each other at events but because we were both in a relationship, we never met just the two of us. However, it was obvious to everyone that knew us that we both liked each other a lot.

Now, five years later, we are both single and have just started spending a lot of time together and getting to know each other properly. Despite my resistance to get involved with someone so young, It already feels comfortable and right. It is clear to both of us that we are both falling for each other deeply but there is a big problem.

There is a 11 year age gap between us. I am 34 and he has just turned 23. I know many will ask me why I am with a 'boy' and ask him what is he doing with 'Old argo' etc.

He is Yoruba and the only son for his mother and they have a very close relationship. I am from a Caribbean background, have no children and have a sucessful career. I do not look my age and in fact have to carry ID around with me to prove I'm older than I look. He is independent and has his own money so I do not believe that there is any financial motive.

The problem is that he seems to be burying his head in the sand when I try to speak to him about how his family might react to our relationship. He won't discuss it. I do not want his family to shun him because of me but I also don't want my heart broken by continuing with a relationship that is doomed. He is a close to a friend of mine that I have known for 15 years and he assures me that he is genuine but this friend also said that he has to show respect.

I'm just not sure whether to take a risk or accept that the relationship is doomed. I wish I could have faith that he would be able to stand up to his family but he is only 23 after all. I cannot expect him to act with the strenght of a 30 year-old when he is only 23.

Morayo