₦airaland Forum

common rubie, the guy shot his friend cos he misunderstood the operator.

this joke was rated the world's funniest joke in a study by psychologist Dr.Richard Wiseman, from the University of Hertfordshire.

why

rubie:
No beefs

what does that mean anyway?

come on guys, i'm here just like every other person to learn, have fun, and share stuffs, not to be a predator to anybody.

get it?

cos we are rulers


what in the hell am i talking about?

hitsales:
Which service provide should I get connected to as there are lots of them like Starcomms and the rest having their service charge for a 24/7 browsing for #10,000.

wrong thread but starcomms charges N10,000 per month.


location : P.H.

isp: starcomms

device type: modem

speed: 230.4kbps

prons: N10,000 (more cheap)

cons: none

the probs is not from ur system but ur flash drive. format the flash disk.if that doesn't work, change the flash disk.

cos they wants to please me

is money and fame not the most important thing in life?

@clem
i'm just hoping the following joke with cheer you up

two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. he doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed.
the other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. he gasps: "my friend is dead! what can i do?" the operator says: "calm down, i can help. first, let's make sure he's dead."
there is a silence, then a shot is heard. back on the phone, the guy says: "ok, now what?"

common mr.

heeeeeeeee

let bygone be bygone

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1. ELTIMA.SOFTWARE.SMART.CALL.MANAGER: (record calls, blacklist, answering machine e.t.c). download link=> http://www.4shared.com/file/24019200/a47c134f/EltimaSoftwareSmartCallManagerv5228S60SymbianOS7CrackedReadNFO-BiNPDA.html

the meaning of na wa is veracious


what is veracious?

4. GOLD XP: (theme)

3. ARSENAL: (theme)

6. ULTIMATE VOICE RECORDER: (record all your phone conversation and play it back anytime)

5. BEEP OFF: (this application will take off the beep during recording)

8. MUMSMS: (protect your sms against unauthorized access)

7. ADVANCE DEVICE LOCK with key gen: (protect all application in your phone including your phone book, fileman and any other application installed on your phone against unauthorized access)

my top 10 favorite smart phone softwares

10. FILEMAN: (manage all files and folder on your phone with ease)

9. GUARDIAN: (protect your mobile phone against theft)

there is an underlying inner sleep system which the quality of your sleep and your
daily energy levels highly depend on.

It’s this inner sleep system that plays a key role in:
• When you go to sleep and when you wake up.
• How energized you feel in the morning, and throughout the day.
• When your body produces feelings of “sleepiness” to send you a signal that you
later interpret in a way like… “I feel tired, I better get to bed…”
Most people don’t know how to use this system to their advantage…
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first 30 seconds after waking up to your advantage and boost your energy levels in the
morning dramatically.

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download password: nawa

omg thanks man

this thread is created with the intention for file sharing and request. so if you are a "shareful" giver or a "thankful" receiver, this thread is for you.

you can share/request the following: -

links
e-books
softwares
music files
video files, e.t.c

personally i have dozens of files to share with everybody. enjoy

yours in sharing

nawa

You can conquer almost any fear if you will only make up your mind to do so. For remember, fear doesn't exist anywhere except in the mind.


Shallow men believe in luck. Strong men believe in cause and
effect.


If you expect the best, you will be the best. Learn to use one of the most powerful laws in this world; change your mental habits to belief instead of disbelief. Learn to expect, not to doubt. In so doing, you bring everything into the realm of possibility.

because alcohol and cigarrette reduces the strength of the guys so they (the guys) would not kill the girls when doing "like that"


why do the girls scream with pleasures when doing "like that"?

i was in the house yesterday, and was hitting hard on myself mercilessly for not address this

Never even made one meaningful comment on this thread.

i regretted the fact that some people do not understand the silent voice of a message. if to you i haven't made any meaningful comment on this thread, then i take it as a challenge to solve the mysteries behind this tree, and i also will

loves to show himself (myself).

first i shall state here that some trees has one, all, or even more of all the characteristics of this tree stated on this thread.

in my village a particular tree is known as the "umbrella tree", cos its leaves and branches spread wide above the stem just like an umbrella. the leaves are so bunched up together that it provides shades against the sun and small rain showers to every thing underneath it.

i love this tree so much that i planted one at our compound in my mothers village for relaxation in the hot afternoons. this tree grows rapidly that my grand mom always cut parts of the branches. whenever i confront her, she will give me an excuse that if she don't cut it, snakes and other creeping creatures may have easy access to the house.

now if you can get the picture of this tree and also know the process by which green plants forms nutrients to grow (photosynthesis), then you can imagine why

No grass grow under it

i do not have time to point at all the characteristics of trees, but i will like to discuss this one

when you cut the tree with knife blood will come out.

i can say with facts that this one is very true. when you cut this or many other trees blood will come out. but its not human blood, "tree blood" that is it. most of these blood varies in colour, some are white, black green yellow, red etc.

some of the red blooded trees are so red that u can mistake it for humans'. you can stain urself with it and deceive an unsuspecting person that it is an actual human blood.

now pictures these characteristic mentioned above and imagine an old man in your village who doesn't know anything about photosynthesis and how seed germinate, saying

This particular tree is a deity.

if this tree still sound mysterious to you then you have seen or heard of nothing yet. there is a plant in the forest of my village that is called "water rope". when we are in the forest and testy, we do not drink water from the pounds or lakes in the, rather we search for this plant, cut it and some cool clean water will gush out from it just like a tap. this particular plant really amaze me. some times i will just cut it, sit back and watch how the water gush out of it.

i don't think these trees are mysterious, but i think human are. the human mind can think of anything and bring it to reality.i also think that the creator of everything is beyond mysteries and also beyond human comprehension.

haven said all these, i will also state that if you still

don't want any beef with

me, you can go ahead and grab a bunch of candles, 7 eggs, 1 chicken, and every other thing that is necessary, locate where Nnunu Ebe is, tire a white cloth around the bottom of the tree, build a shrine there and do your thing. then i will grab my frying pan and all other necessary condiment, fry the eggs, use the chicken for pepper soup, and also

vandalised and sell to the whites

every thing in the shrine.

Welcome To My World Lyrics & mp3
Artist(Band):Jim Reeves


WELCOME TO MY WORLD.

WELCOME TO MY WORLD
WON'T YOU COME ON IN
MIRACLES I GUESS
STILL HAPPEN NOW AND THEN

STEP INTO MY HEART
LEAVE YOUR CARES BEHIND
WELCOME TO MY WORLD
BUILT WITH YOU IN MIND

KNOCK AND THE DOOR WILL OPEN
SEEK AND YOU WILL FIND
ASK AND YOU WILL BE GIVEN
THE KEY TO THIS WORLD OF MINE

I'LL BE WAITING HERE
WITH MY ARMS UNFURLED
WAITING JUST FOR YOU
WELCOME TO MY WORLD

Download mp3=> http://www.4shared.com/file/23947962/daeaad01/01_welcome_to_my_world.html
download password: nawa

[quote author=krs-2 link=topic=75388.msg1481479#msg1481479 date=1189437102]@ na wah[/quote]please spell my name correctly

[quote author=krs-2 link=topic=75388.msg1481479#msg1481479 date=1189437102]OK,I don't want any beef with you.[/quote]am not sure what that's suppose to mean

[quote author=krs-2 link=topic=75388.msg1481479#msg1481479 date=1189437102]I just tried to see if you could change your perception of life[/quote]what the hell? have you changed yours

[quote author=krs-2 link=topic=75388.msg1481479#msg1481479 date=1189437102]you win homie.[/quote]what in the hell did i win?

[quote author=krs-2 link=topic=75388.msg1481479#msg1481479 date=1189437102]No more hard feelings aight?[/quote]never had one

[quote author=krs-2 link=topic=75388.msg1481479#msg1481479 date=1189437102]at least we are even now in the barrage of insults.[/quote]i never intend any insult.

cos the humans eat up the animals on a daily bases


i stuck my thing on the zipper, what can i do to ease the pains

[quote author=krs-2 link=topic=75388.msg1481258#msg1481258 date=1189433867]@krs-2
who the hell are you?
who talked to your ass? just because I told kashif not to be embarrass doesn't mean that drama kings exists,punk!

I even wonder what sort of trash fills up your feeble mind.

Once more,Asshole,punk!![/quote]

same joke, different version.


LAST DAY ON THE JOB

it was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood.
when he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope.

at the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars.

the folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.

at the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee .
she took him by the hand gently led him through the door, and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced.

when he had had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast, eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh squeezed orange juice.

when he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee. as she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge. "all this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the dollar for?"
"well," she said, "last night, i told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. i asked him what to give you" he said, "screw him, give him a dollar."
the lady then said, "the breakfast was my idea."

TOP 10 SIGNS YOU ARE AN INTERNET GEEK

10. when filling out your driver's license application you give your ip address.

9. you no longer ask prospective dates what their sign is, instead your line is "hi, what's your URL?"

8. instead of calling you to dinner, your spouse sends e-mail.

7. you're amazed to find out spam is a food.

6. you "ping" people to see if they're awake, "finger" them to find out how they are, and "AYT" them to make sure they're listening to you.

5. you search the net endlessly hoping to win every silly free t-shirt contest.

4. you introduce your wife as "my lady@home.wife" and refer to your children as "client applications".

3. at social functions you introduce your husband as "my domain server".

2. after winning the office super bowl pool you blurt out, "i feel so "colon-right parentheses!"

1. two words: pizza's here!"

TOP 10 THINGS NOT TO SAY ON YOUR ANNIVERSARY

10. i stopped caring about anniversaries when you stopped caring about cooking.

9. today is our what?

8. okey, let's celebrate, but do we have to celebrate together?

7. i thought we only celebrated important events?

6. you can celebrate anniversaries with your next husband.

5. you don't like what i pick out, so i thought why bother.

4. i got you a present worth a dollar for every time you were nice to me this year. here's a $5 gift certificate for mr.biggs.

3. if you want me to pretend like i care about our anniversary, i will.

2. you want to go out to dinner? okey, okey, i'll take you to pizza hut if it'll shut ya up.

1. i thought you only had to celebrate anniversaries while you were still in love.

i have 100s of joke on my phone. let me start sharing some here.

TOP 10 LIST


TOP 10 SIGNS THAT YOU ARE TOO DRUNK:

10. you have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.

9. mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you.

8. the back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.

7. your idea of cutting back is less salt.

6. you can focus better with one eye closed.

5. the whole bar greets you when you come in.

4. you haven't had a driver's license in such a long time that you have forgotten what one looks like.

3. roseanne looks good.

2. you don't recognise your wife/husband unless seen through bottom of glass.

1. you spent more time on the floor than you do standing up

common guy, you can't be embarrass just yet

never be afraid to express yourself.

The greatest pollution problem we face today is negativity. Eliminate the negative attitude and believe you can do anything. Replace 'if I can, I hope, maybe' with 'I can, I will, I must.


It's takin' whatever comes your way, the good AND the bad, that give life flavor. It's all the stuff rolled together that makes life worth livin'.


The difference between a successful person and others is not a
lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of
will.

request

woman from an engineer point of view