My daughter Elizabeth is three and half years old, and she cracks me up all the time. See below for two of her stories, and share some of your children's funny comments.


Elizabeth tends to fuss a lot when it's bedtime. So a while ago, I told her an hour in advance that it was almost bedtime, and I didn't want a tantrum tonight. To which she replied, "okay mummy, you can count on me!"

That was funny enough in itself, but come bedtime, my daughter looks at me crossly and says:

Elizabeth: Mummy, I told you, you can count on me

Mummy: Yes, and I am proud of you for keeping your word

Elizabeth: Well, you didn't count on me, you are supposed to say (touching her head) 1, 2, 3, 4. . .

I think I laughed my head off!


One more. . .

I have been trying to teach her the value of money and how you can't have everything you want. So sometimes in the store, when she wants a toy I say, "Elizabeth, you can't have that because it costs two (or three) moneys, and mummy only has one".

Well, one day we go to the mall and I enter this really expensive store. After looking at two price tags, I decide that I have no business being in there and start to hustle Elizabeth out the door. At this point, she turns around and says to me, in a very loud voice so everyone in the store can hear, "Mummy, are we leaving because you don't have enough money to buy the things?" Embarassing!!!

Nice my friends nephew came to spend xmas at his house. They came 4rm d uk unfortunately NEPA in dere usual glory struck and d kid screamd "mom i cant see i am blind, i am blind" it was so funny we culdnt stop talkin abt it 4 days.

I have a younga broda who is 5yrs old . My mum told him to sweep a small portion of d compound to enable her concentrate on wat she was doin. In d usual style of children tryin to get of chores he said "God will see my bom bom if i do like dis (demonstratin d sweepin positn ). I am sure d Almighty was bored my brodas butt was a good distractn.

shut up daddy

Amasing wat kids can say without considering the embarssment

My dad came back home one day very tied trying 2 get rest without any disturb he says to u the children

"Anybody ask of me, am not home" while wallking into his room 2 rest.
Some minutes later a friend of my dad came checking, approaching the least child he says
"Little boy how r u 2day, where is your dad"

Our last kid of 4years replies; "He is inside but said i should tell u he is not at home"

children are funny to be with. and if u are the type that like staying with children, u ll never have a dull moment.
my daughter that is 2+ was was asked to pray fr us one night when we were saying our night prayer and she said(Lord i thk u fr daddy n mummy amen,pyss Jejush dont yet oduudu(ojuju ie evil spirit and kiilappersh ie kidnappers catch my mummy in jejush name) the amen was hilarious

when my ant.came from UK with his kid,on their way home he saw molue with smoke
he started shouting fire inside the car fire mum call 911 pls our car is beside it i don't wanna die plsssss'

Nice                    my friends nephew came to spend xmas at his house. They came 4rm d uk unfortunately  NEPA in dere usual glory struck and d kid screamd "mom i cant see i am blind, i am blind" it was so funny we culdnt stop talkin abt it 4 days.

Funny, and as usual a sad commentary about the situation in Nigeria. Out of the mouth of babes. . . .

jlee:

Amasing wat kids can say without considering the embarssment

My dad came back home one day very tied trying 2 get rest without any disturb he says to u the children

"Anybody ask of me, am not home" while wallking into his room 2 rest.
Some minutes later a friend of my dad came checking, approaching the least child he says
"Little boy how r u 2day, where is your dad"

Our last kid of 4years replies; "He is inside but said i should tell u he is not at home"

Te he he.I have experienced same scenario when i went to see an aunt.

My sis went to visit her friend sometime ago and bought biscuits for her friends son. When she gave them to the little boy,she was a bit surprised at how greedily he tore at the wrappings and starting grubbing. so,she asked him, bobo,why're you eating like that? and he says
'i have to start eating them before aunty comes.she begs too much!'
he was talking bout his mum's sis!

Kids can embarrass people some times, but they remain cute and sweet.

enmwata:

My sis went to visit her friend sometime ago and bought biscuits for her friends son. When she gave them to the little boy,she was a bit surprised at how greedily he tore at the wrappings and starting grubbing. so,she asked him, bobo,why're you eating like that? and he says
'i have to start eating them before aunty comes.she begs too much!'
he was talking bout his mum's sis!

***LMAO*** dat boi mean ooo

Funny and interesting world of kids!

My little niece and I once engaged in the following conversation

Me: Lope, how old are you?
Tomi: I'm 3years old
Me: How old am I?
Tomi: You are 6 years old'
Me: No, am older than 6
Tomi: Ok, you are 7

(When I said 'No' she kept increasing it by 1yr and by the time she got to '10' I was bored and I said

Me: Tomi, how can I be 10yrs old, can't you see how big I am? She kept quite for about a minute and I guess she did some mental calculation she looked up to me and said with excitement

Tomi: "Aunty, you are BIG years old'!!!

Kids and their funny ways

A friend shares a conversation between her 8 yr old son and 5 yr old daughter,

Daughter: You are sagging, you are sagging

Son: I am not sagging. It's the trouser, the waist is big.

_{(Their mum, overhearing the conversation between the two call the son)}

Mum: The waist is big? Come and wear another trouser.

Son: (In response to mum). No. I like the trouser like that.

@ the kid that said his aunty begs too much.


When I was a kid we had a guy that used to visit with us and he was blind in one eye. I was so fascinated by the eye and I just had to know what happened to it. I knew I could not do it while my mom was around so I waited for the perfect time. As soon as I thought it was safe I said "Brother what happened to your eye". Unfortunately what I thought was a whisper was loud enough for my mom to hear. She and my Aunty brushed me that day.

I think the way my lil brother answers his name is so cute and funny.

"Yeeehh" So cute

awww blesss

LOL, even though we spent time screaming at each other throughout this week

He'll answer and look up to you with the cutest and most innocent eyes.

Just a few hours ago:

Lil brother: I wan don (or down)
Me: What? Down?
Lil Brother: No!! don don. Mama don
Me: Mommy, what does he mean by don?
Mommy: He wants you to put him down
Me: ok. puts him down
Lil Brother: Starts crying No no [raises his arms for me to carry him) I wan don.
Me: Picks him up Ok, sorry. Down it is.

We went over this for some minutes Had to give him some juice to keep him quiet

lol that thing confuses me
the squirm when u carry them n claw at u when u try to drop em

So you gave him sugar so that he could start bouncing off the walls. Remind me never to ask you to babysit LOL

rotfl. It was the mid afternoon jare. And he was crying too much.
He wanted "don" and I couldnt understand what don meant

sugar+kids+mid afternoon is a certified disaster
i should know

bluespice:

sugar+kids+mid afternoon is a certified disaster
i should know

LOL, at that point I just wanted to either understand what don meant or to keep him quiet.

titilaelae:

Funny and interesting world of kids!

My little niece and I once engaged in the following conversation

Me: Lope, how old are you?
Tomi: I'm 3years old
Me: How old am I?
Tomi: You are 6 years old'
Me: No, am older than 6
Tomi: Ok, you are 7

(When I said 'No' she kept increasing it by 1yr and by the time she got to '10' I was bored and I said

Me: Tomi, how can I be 10yrs old, can't you see how big I am? She kept quite for about a minute and I guess she did some mental calculation she looked up to me and said with excitement

Tomi: "Aunty, you are BIG years old'!!!

Couldnt stop laffing

My sister’s husband was trying to compliment his little daughter who just had her hair done and he said to her ‘Nene you her is looking sweet’. His son who is just 3 asked in surprise ‘is it a Rice’? (as far as he was concerned, its only food that could be sweet)

What made his question so funny was the complete innocence and surprise he expressed. It was so hilarious!! After his dad gently explaind what he meant to him. He actually saw the humour in his question and turned it to a joke.

Immidiately my sister (his mother) came home, he rushed to her and said 'Mummy, Nene's hair is looking Rice'

LOL. Poor baby actually thought he now understood the whole thing

enmwata:

My sis went to visit her friend sometime ago and bought biscuits for her friends son. When she gave them to the little boy,she was a bit surprised at how greedily he tore at the wrappings and starting grubbing. so,she asked him, bobo,why're you eating like that? and he says
'i have to start eating them before aunty comes.she begs too much!'
he was talking bout his mum's sis!

This is the joke of the millennium, this child has to become a comedian when he grows older

lol

Daddy I want to eat.

,mama-gee:

Daddy I want to eat.

Aunty,
You are black and uncle is fair small. How come your baby is very yellow
The mother kept apologising, i just kept laughing, it was so funny!!

My 5 yr old boy was reporting my friend's daughter

He: mummy Sade kissed Sean in school today

Me: Yeah its only a greeting you know like when i kiss you

He: No mummy is not the kiss that you want to be friends its the kiss that you want to be boyfriend and girlfriend

I cld not believe my ears.