You write intelligently.I am going to ask you a few questions.

Do you have little resources to take care of both of you?

Do you still live with your parents or do you live alone in an apartment comfortable for two?

Are you willing to marry her now?

Above all Bro,you should not allow your emotions to enslave you.Marriage isn't just for now,it's for better or worse.I hope you understand that you've not really known this lady too well until you guys tie the knot?Please search yourself prayerfully and decide if you want to start a journey with her now.

But wait,what if her parents refuse her marrying you even if she agrees to marry you?

I was really moved and close to tears after reading your post.

You seem to me like a jelly fish,it's glaring that your wife is not being truthful to you regarding somethings.I weep for men like you because you sounded like a good man and husband from your post.What I do not understand is whether you are a lover man or a coward that you cannot strike the blade on the edge.You need to let your wife know that she has betrayed the trust you have in her.I am not insinuating anything but you don't have to wait till the young man in question start sharing your matrimonial bed with you before you take action.

You do not need to be confrontational or violent,just lay down the rules,no more loans from anyone without your knowledge.If you must know,she doesn't respect you at all.Can you just be a man and earn your respect by being firm?You do not need to be violent to be a man,just let your stand be known to her.

Do you even know her too well before marriage?I think I should just stop here,God wanted you to see what's been happening with your very eyes that's why you witnessed that with your very eyes.Shalom!

He allowed his emotions to becloud his sense of judgment and here is the consequence.Nigerian judges still sentence condemned criminals to death by hanging when no one wants to do the job of hangs man again.

The absence of certified hangs men in Nigeria explains why there are many condemned criminals on the death row waiting to be hanged.

I actually know one of his descendants.According to his only surviving male great grand-son,his father, who was a judge in Gambia(or Guinea) died in a plane crash along with five of his six male children on his way to Gambia(or Guinea) for a Court proceeding.His only surviving male great grand child told me he survived because his mother just had him and she would not be able to fly at such time. Late Mrs. Abimbola Da-Rocha Afodu Omoloulu-Mulele the owner of ADRAO international school in Lagos was one of the descendants of Da Rocha.

Da Rocha's story is never complete without the article below.I copied it from a source I cannot actually remember the source because I have had it for a while....Enjoy.

Olowo bi "Darosa" in my Ibadan accent....

Nigeria's first millionaire...

Mr. Candido Da Rocha was a native of Ilesha and was a slave returnee from Brazil. He returned to Nigeria in 1870 from Salvador Brazil, and quickly built a small fortune plying the lucrative South Atlantic trade route. Da Rocha was arguably the first Nigerian millionaire.
He was popularly known as “BaBa Olomi” and had his head office at Kakawa Street, Marina Lagos. He became a testament to the industrial will, that led to the establishment of the Iju Water Works, that served the entire Lagos in the 1920’s before it was taken over by the colonial administration.
Da Rocha laid pipes from Iju to Lagos Island, Yaba, Ebute-metta and other communities in Lagos where there were high demand for pipe borne water. He was selling to individuals until it was taken over by the Colonial Government, who was paying Da Rocha for the supply of water to Lagos and was thus a pioneer of private ownership of utilities in Nigeria.
He was so wealthy, that it was the popular saying in Yoruba- that, if you lure someone into spending money, the person would resist your trap by saying “do you think I am Da Rocha”. A rich man’s wealth is always comparable to that of Da Rocha –“he is as rich as Da Rocha”.
Da Rocha in his time was highly influential, his intervention during the scarcity of water in Lagos in the early 1920’s gave him the appellation of“BabaOlomi”.

#WhatWillYouBeRememberedFor?

A re-engineering may come soon at the NPA and it would bring happiness to everyone who has worked there in the past and those who are still working there(If NPA is owing your mother and other pensioners,they may soon get paid).Shalom.

Friend,I will advise that you pray very well about this and follow your mind. "Leaping before looking" has caused a lot of issues in marriages these days and the truth is that devil is at work to ensure marriages collapse.His target is the women folks knowing that they are weaker vessels,some weak men too are being infiltrated.

I was in your shoes for four years but I never for once beat her nor did I share bills with her.Mine was a very abusive and one sided relationship.She would rain curses just like your case and the curses really affected me until I decided "never again" and I began to pray to counteract the curses with prayers.I moved out exactly 2 years and 2 weeks ago with just a back bag containing my certificates with some clothes when all efforts proved abortive.

I ensure my children don't lack anything financially and I visit them once in a while.I miss not seeing them daily though but I cherish my life.Devil is wise,he has seen a potential in you and probably has tried everything to no avail then decided to help you supervise the choice of woman to marry.What happens most times is that your wife may not even know what she is doing,maybe she is being controlled by a force,the force speaks through her and all sorts.She must have a feature which attracted the evil forces to her(likes attract likes).It could be anger,malice,jealousy etc.

Don't beat her again,you need to understand that we wrestle not against flesh and blood,try and sit her down and understand why she's bitter,involve your pastors if need be and go for deliverance together.Encourage her pray with you in the morning and night. If these don't work then use your head Bro.

Inspite of the fact that we paid 45K to register our official truck with a commercial plate number in Kogi state,we were made to pay another N19k on the Edo-Ondo high way when travelling from Lokoja to Ondo state last week.Those thugs were drunk,had long sticks with nails on it and were ready to cause accident if we tried to outrun them.

The guys were drunk and could even pass for armed robbers and kidnappers.They were just not ready to let go of the truck despite the fact that we had all our papers.I thought it wise to pay the money,get the papers and leave quickly since it was just my colleague and I.

As if that was not enough,we were stopped like 1 km away from the place by Federal High way patrol.The Inspector that took our papers began to rain abuses on us for nothing.He said I stood beside them when checking the particulars.We had to cough out another N2k to get our papers back when he said the back glass is tinted and since we didn't have license,we must go with them to their station.

Thank you,she is yet to change.

It's been 2 years since I left the house and,I have relocated to another state.I will say I have peace of mind(and she's good too because she did not care to look for me nor call any of my family member).I talk to my children on phone and I visit them once in a while.I still take care of my children the way I used,the only thing that has changed is that I do not see them everyday as I would have loved to.I have been living alone for a while and there has been temptations and trials.I have fallen and risen many times(please don't judge me).

The issue is I have yet to have have any steady relationship since then.I even tried to get serious with a lady in my office but when she said she only wanted children and would not want to live with a man, I backed out.We have yet to start the divorce plans as I do not have the originals of the marriage certificate(dunno if this is a bottle neck to filing for divorce anyway) .

Do you think it is the right time for me to start a relationship?Please advise me.

*Please read the story

It's been 2 years since I left the house and,I have relocated to another state.I will say I have peace of mind(and she's good too because she did not care to look for me nor call any of my family member).I talk to my children on phone and I visit them once in a while.I still take care of my children the way I used,the only thing that has changed is that I do not see them everyday as I would have loved to.I have been living alone for a while and there has been temptations and trials.I have fallen and risen many times(please don't judge me).

The issue is I have yet to have have any steady relationship since then.I even tried to get serious with a lady in my office but when she said she only wanted children and would not want to live with a man, I backed out.We have yet to start the divorce plans as I do not have the originals of the marriage certificate(dunno if this is a bottle neck to filing for divorce anyway) .

debrief08: So sorry about this.
Please don't be quick to file for divorce, seems like a huge communication gap, have you tried counseling?

I am not trying to tell you what to do just please use the period of seperation to evaluate things. The Spiritual issues you brought out am usually careful about because when Spirtual issues enter Nigerians matter dey change, reasoning can be hard.

Whatever you both decide please have a healthy environment for your kids, no hating or insulting each other or using them as pawns. Bless you for putting their welfare first, also keep a relationship with them.
Sorry about your pain. God heal you

Thanks a lot and i really appreciate you.I discussed with her to let's ensure the kids don't get affected,as such we should be in talking terms while we stay apart.As i said,I will continue to provide for them,I don't intend to cut down on the monthly bill,I won't take her off my health insurance plans etc,etc.

Hello All

I finally left the house on 01 January 2013.People please read my story and learn. Even if you suspect foul play on the wedding day, please quit and save yourself the headache rather than struggling to make things work. If you are a lady and you have a brother who is too nice or a Jelly fish(like I was),please watch his back so he would not end up falling into wrong hands. I was in love, will I say I was a fool or so? I think its the fear of God.

It’s been close to a year and 3months since I last commented on this issue, not because it died down in November 2011 or I got solution then but I chose to live with it as my cross. A lot of things came to play which to an ordinary eye would seem impossible. Whilst I would have loved to mention those things here, I choose not to. For those who did not read my story in 2010, let me do a quick flashback.

My wife and I started as friends at the Obafemi Awolowo University, Ile-Ife and after we left school we met agian in Abuja where i had to accommodate her thinking one good turn deserves another. One thing led to the other and we became intimate, she wanted to know the plans I had for her. It was as if she proposed . Within 2 months she asked that I come to meet her people so we could fix a date for introduction which we did exactly after 4 months. I was gullible, I thought I had seen a lady free of charge because I didn't have a girlfriend and, had kept myself from ladies for close to 2 years( I didn't have sex
).

Her attitudes became worrisome in the fifth month.Initially we used to kiss for long and make love well but she changed 2 months before our wedding.I ignored all warning signs from her thinking she would change after the wedding(People would say I should have ran,thinking its that easy,especially where an extra terrestial transaction was in force).I even recall her saying she would call the wedding plans quit because I told her I was expecting some money for the remaining things we needed to buy(a month to the wedding.We married in the seventh month(meaning we courted or dated whatever for six months).

My wife became a different person entirely almost immediately after we got married and I developed thick skin (after it appeared as if sex which was one of the earliest warning signals was a mode of punishment).I could stay for 2 months or 3 months without having sex.It could be just once or twice in 2 months.She would tell me she never intended to get married but for her Mum who pleaded with her to get a man whom she would marry and that she never had the intention of marrying.In 2011 December when the issue became so intensed,I resorted to fasting and prayers and I began to see things(please don't think its a joke).My people its more of a spiritual warfare than physical battle.The long and short of it is that I had to leave the house I paid for,I abandoned the 2004 model Nissan Jeep I acquired in May 2012 and every other things to save my dear life.I liKe to remind those who read the story initially that my first toyota jeep was being used by her and,when it started having faults she left it for me which I sold and got a facility to buy another one.

I loved her to a fault that Inspite of all her shortcomings,I handed the new Nissan's key over to her when I bought it in May/June 2012.We had just one car and were living inside University of Abuja staff quarters.Her office is around Airport road while i work in Maitam.I choosed to go by public transport so she could drive the Jeep and drop my son-off at school.What an experience!I remember she called me sometimes in August 2012 on a Monday morning that I should come and pick my Jeep on the road because according to her,I deliberately exhausted the fuel in the Jeep on Sunday evening didnt fill it as a result of which the fuel finished in the morning on her way and the Jeep stopped(truth is I didn't have a dime one me and I needed to go to town to source for money to enable me go to work next day).We had an agreement before fuel subsidy era in Jan 2012 and I give her monthly allowance for fuelling the car (though I did not review it post subsidy because I din't get a pay rise at work too).I didn't remember to say that I pay close to NGN70,000 monthly to service the facility I took for the jeep.

Whilst I would not like to appear as a saint because I have my shortcomings too,I like to state that I am a man any woman will love to live with all her life.I did not ask her to share in any of the bills,even to the last kobo I was responsible.She had refused to collect our first son's school fees from me on 2 ocassions insisting I take it to the bank myself because she said I gave her 24hours after the normal day she requested I bring it.I stooped for the marriage to work but it fell apart.I have been working for 7years with a good organisation here in Abuja and my take home pay is okay enough to save and buy land in the outskirts of Abuja but,I could not save to buy half a plot let alone one.I worked earnestly to get promotion but it eluded me for years.My colleagues(three of them) whom we earned the same salary and were given same number of task to handle got 65% raise and I got 10% in June 2012 for no reason.I handled several projects between July and December 2012 which were applauded by our mother company In Germany only for my immediate boss to get recognition and was promoted in December 2012 for 2 projects I handled successfully.

This may sound like another Nolly wood or rather an over hyped story but its true.Several events unfolded and it turned out that the woman I struggle to satisfy, in collaboration with her mother were the ones behind my predicament,at first I did not believe but my people the Bible says out of the mouth of 2 or 3 people shall the truth be established.I went as far as 7 and not 3 and if I request that they pray with me concerning my work,the next thing would be "Where is your wife and her mother"?Each time you sleep with her she drains you spiritually.

None of my people could help me, It was so bad that everyone ran for their lives, my Christian parents (that live in Gwagwalada,a stone throw to my place abandoned my house)never stopped praying that God should set me free which eventually came on 01 01 2013.My story is incomplete without thanking God Almighty for sparing my life. Currently, my 2 sons are with her, and I call to speak with them every week,I paid my son's school fees on this morning(14/01/2012),paid off our Nanny's bill(both close to NGN 200,000) and I have promised that if she maintains the 3 bedroom apartment in Kubwa,I will continue to pay and will come around to take my children out and even come to my place to spend the weekends. For me, its like the proverbial Dog that enstranged into the lion's than and escaped unhurt, then it should thank its star."

My 2013 resolution:"Shed-off all unwanted loads and travel light".Shalom.

Thanks House,I need to ask here that is it actually a crime to express love for a woman?

I am back again after 5 months and this time there is no going back as I have made up my mind that come what may,I'm no longer going to stay with that woman.2 weeks ago we had a misunderstanding just 24hrs after I returned from a 2 week official trip to Malaysia.The problem is that this woman doesn't see me as her husband despite the fact that i do everything a man should do to make a woman happy.I had accident in the month of August on my way home at around 7:20pm and when I got home my wife kept mute.This went for like 2 weeks all in the name of being angry over the fact that I didn't come home early(I came home around 8:45pm) whereas I called and told her severally that I had accident.

I guess she wanted all the freedom in this world to herself and I am not bossy either.She became pregnant again months back and while we were in the middle of a conversation,I told her my stand on the matter of discourse and the only thing that could come from this woman was that she would terminate the 2 months pregnancy. I told her off and made her realise I never felt threatened by her utterances again.I must confess that I had been too soft in handling things with her in the past,I danced to the tone of her music even when I played the piper.

I bought her a blackBerry Torch Last month before going to Malaysia just to make her happy. I also gave her sufficient money to cater for the homefront just to satisfy her,I never disputed the choice of school she wanted our son of a year and 9months to attend(a little below one hundred thousand naira).I ensured that I satisfied all her needs but she would not let me rest for one day.When we were in Malaysia,some guys brought ladies to make our stay "worthwhile so to speak" but I held my grounds that I would not join them in the act only for me to get home and the woman at home was behaving funny.There was even a lady who slept in my room one of the nights when we were in Malaysia and we did not touch each other,I had to sleep on the rug that night. This lady came from Togo to attend the same seminar we attended.She came for a night out organised by the training facilitators in our hotel that nights and after the event at about 10:15pm she decided to relax a bit in my room before going back to her hotel but slept off.All my pleads to her to go to her hotel fell on deaf ears.She claimed to be feeling dizzy and tired due to an anti Malaria drug she took during the day.

House,it's been 3 weeks since this woman stopped saying goodmorning to me.To cap it all,she deleted me from her BB contact list last weekend,a phone that I bought for her just a month ago.There was a day she was even asking if i was the one that broke the key to the cupboard where she keeps provision.I was baffled because I never could have imagined that a woman I gave money to buy provisions and so on could be asking such questions.It turned out to be that her younger sister was the one who forced it open when she wanted to take somethings there.

My point is this,People may say whatever they like after hearing that I have moved on with my life but I don't give a hoot at this time because I had lived like a total stranger in my own house for close to 3years all in the name of love but now my eyes are widely opened and all I want now is to get her out of my life.Many thanks to the advice by some of you guys that I should not distant myself from my friends because I was really weighted down by these events but thanks to God Almighty and some friends whose company now gives me a sense of belonging(though I didn't discuss it with them).

She is at home while I have been in Makurdi on an official assignment since Sunday trying to make ends meet and I still performed my financial responsibility by dropping a token before leaving home,though she asked my little boy to collect it from me.She is 5months pregnant but I don't want her again,what do I do?Should I wait till she puts to bed before I take action or should I file for a divorce immediately?What steps do I take to ensure I have access to my children?How do I go about it?Please save a soul!

Regards
Oladelove.

House it about 6 or 7 months since I told you about my wife & the treatments i get from a woman I agreed to live the rest of my life with.

If this is what marriage is all about I bet i would rather stay single.My wife is killing me emotionally,I only have access to her as long as she wants me.I am a slave in my own house,I try everything within my capacity to please her and make her happy but it seems each time I do so,she gets to hate me the more.I am a man that a woman would like to have anyday!I am Godfearing,I perform my roles as a husband and father,I don't keep late at night,i don't womanise,i don't take alcohol.

I could see the hatred in her face,I could sense it,and what I get for being a good husband is to be treated like an outcast.One thing i don't understand is that each time we are apart she would call severally to ask for my whereabout but when we see face to face,the war starts.Recently she went to the hospital & Doctors told her her BP was too high,they could observe from her records that it's been consistently like that for close to 2years.One of the doctors asked if she had anything she was thinking about and she could not answer it.I knew she was not just happy with herself,either in the marriage or something but she would not let me know what the issue(s) is/are.After one month and the BPwas still like that,my wife called me that when the doctor asked if she had anything that bothers her that she could not think of any other thing than me being her issue.She then said she would like me to let her get an apartment close to where she works so she could monitor her BP for 6 months or 1 yrafter which she would come back home.Immediately I agreed but I think she realised I was willing to let go of her so i haven't heard about that since April.

Don't get me wrong pls,we don't scream or yell at each other at home but,there is the unassuming silence when we are at home that gives me the impression that something is not going right.I have yet to celebrate a week without misunderstanding with my wife at home since we got married in 2009 and all these are not known to the outsiders.She would always find a fault in whatever I do,even when I'm driving,it's either i am too rough or something else,when we are making love(which i would have to dance to her tune before she agrees to:e.g ;no foreplays,no fingers,no kissing;no styles just bishops & it's just one round) she would also complain, its either she 's not enjoying it or she's tired.

We have a lovely child & each time I look at my child,I weep within.House I think I am ready to walk away now but she has always promised that I won't see my child again if we break up until my child is of age and desires to know who the Dad is.

What do I do please ?

So what is NCC doing about the excesses of all the telecoms companies?Today its Airtel,tomorrow it will be MTN!Yet these people cannot even try all these nonsense in their respective countries."Indians!Very inhuman set of people, in the name of "managing resources" or better still "cutting cost" they can make a person work 24/7 for no significant pay.

I weep for this country because all these incidents a traceable to bad leadership.Our leaders don't have the interest of the citizens in mind.you dare not try this in South Africa.Our leaders can likened to the biblical Esau who sold his birth right for a pottage.What a piteous fate!

There is absolutely nothing wrong with it .But wait a minute,what happens the day you don't do it and your wife picks an offence and tells you to your face "You are just a lay about,you only like to eat,sleep with me,"when was the last time you helped in washing my Pant/car etc".Funny though!

To answer some of the questions,I can't even expalain what her relationship woth God is like.She doesn't fear anybody!When you talk about God she looks at you and move on.She is hardened,doesn't fear even her parents.I must confess that the past 24 months we've been living together has been like living in the prison.My friends are far from me,my people are far from me,she hates seeing people in our home.She reacted same way to my mother who would rather leave instead of exchanging words with her.

@ the question on spiritual angle of it,
When we were courting,she told me she had about 2 other relationships(courtships) that she became disinterested along the line and opted out.I cannot rule out the place of her choice of character as not being under the influence of a spirit.



Just on Friday 04/12/10, I saw that my wife added some men on FB living abroad.She threatened to elope with my son,says i will never see him again.She was telling me about one of them who chats well with her,I pretended as if i was not interested only to check her phone and what i saw was "Hello dear how was your, ",a stranger.

I don't understand the kind of wife that chats with men she didn't know from Adam.She has really caused me lots of worries.People i am not a fool but i don't just understand what has come over me.

I never knew it would be like this.I bought a jeep,gave her to drive to the office while I would join friends to the office because she works in a private firm in the heart of Abuja(we live in Kubwa) and they don't have a staff bus,i fuel the car,but she still believes I don't love herwash the car again aas i used to.

She has also said she is waiting for an appointed time to move,I don't know what time she'e waiting for but i told her i would be ready to gladingly part with all we share in common rather than loosing my life.That i am not crying doesn't mean i am not emotional!

I really need you people to help me,I love mySon so much.

Thanks to everyone for the advice,I know I have a battle to fight and I must conquer by God's grace.I will continue to seek the face of God.


*Please join me in prayers that God should have mercy on me,my home and replace the heart of a beast in my wife with the heart of a sheep.

@Oladelove. . .it just occurred to me to ask and I will appreciate your answer. If you cannot write here, please email me. I have very good reasons why I ask:

1. What is the relationship with your wife and parents like, especially her MOTHER?

*They are not close at all,imagine a lady would hide things from her mother.She went through a trauma she could not even discuss her mother.

2. Do you have any idea of the relationship between her father and mother?
*Father:Proud, a bully ,sadist,highly temperamental and unappreciative.Mother :Down to earth,caring,xtian-an example a Virturous woman .

3. Do you have a good idea of her relationship between her and her siblings?
*Though they all grew up together,they’re not so close cos she had serious issue with her sister when she was living with her to the extent that she had to pack out.Of the 8 children,5(very temperamental and proud),3 down to earth.

4. How about her closest friends?
They’ve been at logger heads for some time now.She is domineering,doesn’t trust anyone and believes in just herself alone.

Don’t know why you’re asking but I will be happy if you can provide ur email address s I didn’t see it on your profile.

Thank you everyone,I will keep praying for her and I will tell the pastors.

@ Yorisb

Thank you for the advice too

Thanks people, we dated for like 6 months before we decided to tie the knot,I am trying all I can but i don't just know where the communication link got broken.My wife is such that would rather keep issues to herself .I have begged her severally,on ht issue of pre-intimacy,my wife sees it as a taboo,she believes pre-intimacy should not even be introduced "Just do it".Infact she has to even be in the mood no matter what you tell her or how you try to play with her.I am sorry i am saying all these but I don't want to die that's why i have to say it out because I have been living with this since our day one in marriage.

On the issue of knowing her before the marriage,we had already sent invitation cards out when she started misbehaving.I really love her and i am willing to do everything to save the marriage.

@ Free cocoa,how I wish u know how long it took before i decided to open up you would not doubt me.If still in doubt leave your phone number in your response and i will call you.

Hello House

I have read various stories on this trend about couples and marital issues but I used to think it was all lies not until I got married in 2009.

I met my wife when I was in University of Ife,we were so close to the extent that people thought we were dating though we were not because she was really helpful in the areas assignments,paying for handouts (which I would later pay back) etc.I would like to add that I knew her fiance then who was serving then( a graduate of Ahmadu Bello University).

We were so close that she would rather confide in me than in her female friends.When we were in our final year,she told me that her boy friend of 7 years had broken up with her for no just cause.According to her,the guy was a confused fellow who did not know what he wanted because she felt it was the mother's handiwork.I really pitied her because she was deeply in love with this guy.

Years after we left school,we met again in Abuja,she had accommodation issues so i decided to help her since one good turn deserves another. One thing led to the other and we decided to give it a try.No sooner than 3 months had we started when she began to show her real self ,it did not really occur to me that i was playing with fire.There was a day she called me a fool in the presence of a friend and i decided i was not going to give her back since that was about the first time she would be doing that.I called my wife to be and advised her that a woman does not say that to her husband but she didn't see anything wrong with what she said. My love for her kept waxing stronger by the day and it didn't occur to me that I was playing with fire. Before we got married,I remember we had a disagreement over the issue of friends,my wife to be threatened to leave the house because she asked me to send away my friends staying with us and i told her no.

That night she cried and said i preferred my friends to her,I later begged her.It was at this point that i realised i was in for a show.Before we got married ,we enjoyed having sex with each other though she was complaining at a point that she was not feeling the sex as it was painful to her or something.She also told me she did not really liked sex.All these while we were making love.it was either during day time or before bedtime,I noticed that my wife would resist every attempt to make love to her at night claiming she would not be able to sleep again.

I remember a night my wife told me her love for people fades away after 6 months .She wasn’t very active in bed but I remained faithful to her with the notion that one day she would change.

I told my wife about it nut she would rather lay the blame on me.Before we got married,she told me one night to be prayerful( I will like to quote her) “You better be prayerful because I don’t know what’s happening to me ooo”.I tought shetaughtoking and I debunked it.

Before we got married, we used to kiss for close to 5minutes or so, I remember the day she told me she wanted us to kiss for 1hour as she said she would only kiss a man she loves .My would be wife stopped kissing me for no reason, I asked if I had mouth odour which she told me no(which i confirmed) just that she would rather prefer me make love without kissing. It became glaring to me that something was wrong and we had already sent out wedding invite, my wife began to misbehave she began to threaten, became wild; she would yell at me as if she was talking to her mother’s last born, at time she would not even speak with me for days and we were living in the same house. I forgot to say that my wife told me she used to keep grudge with her mother for Weeks and the mother would have to come and beg her finally.

My people let me go straight to the point ,as it is now,I have a wife I cannot kiss,my wife complains anytime I ask her for sex,she would rather give a date than to yield and i will have to beg and beg before she would allow me.she would be motionless on bed whenever we are making love and she would rather treat me like I am visiting a prostitute whom you cannot kiss or do some pre-intimacy with.Since we got married (even before we became legally married) I have never slept with my wife in the middle of the night before,she will fight it to a standstill.

Before we started dating,I did not make love to any woman for 2years so I made up my mind I will not make love to any other woman even we started seeing each other(before marriage) till today that we are married.
House,help me where did I err?We are married for over 2years and the union is blessed with a baby boy but my wife would rather wait for me on bed as she believes that’s the only weapon she could use to fight me.

I don’t want to be a divorcee as it is against my religion as a Christian and I also love my child.What can I do please?