₦airaland Forum

brain54:
If you waited for 2 years of courtship...

You should put back your waiting cap for 9 months of pregnancy.

By the way I am not a fan of no sex before marriage for the simple reason of sexual compatibility.

I believe these are part of things that should be observed during courtship.

Just be decent about it and not use it as excuse for waywardness!

A legally married man should put his cap on hold for 9 months? And who told you you can start knacking you wife again immediately after 9 months? U must at least give her 8 weeks to heal after delivery
And it differs from women to women
Some could take more time

motymop:
If she missed her period about two weeks after your wedding night, it might be a bit early for a pregnancy to be detected by a missed period because ovulation and conception usually happen midcycle. But it's still possible if timing aligns.

When she started having cramps we both it's her normal menstrual cramps.... After 3 weeks we confirmed the result of pregnancy
Her pregnancy was just 3 weeks old whe we did the test
And from our calendar the date of conception is about the time we had our first sex.... The second night of our wedding

We got married in ending of August
We didn't have anything to do together at all during our 2 year courtship
She's really adorable and a Godly babe to the core
On the second night of our wedding I confirmed she was a virgin
Sadly our honeymoon only lasted Barely 2 weeks before she missed her period
Here is the issue;
Since over a month and some few weeks now she won't let me touch her, in fact it's like my touches irritate her, no sex, no kiss, no smooching, no touching
It sometimes feels we're just house mates who shares same matrimonial bed together
I have tried to talk to her many times about my sexual wellness but she seems not interested at all
My marriage is less than 2 months and I am already over a month sex starved
Perhaps she sometimes complains of pregnancy cramps but this should not com at the detriment of my sexual well being.....
And besides she's goes to work everyday but the moments she gets home she won't let me touch not even slight touches not to talk of sex or romance....
I am already tired 😩

She's happily married and she's respectful
I'm worried because her sister fit dey control her

femmy2010:
Is she respectful ? Is her sister happily married ?
If yes , you almost have nothing to worry about .

We barely gossip about her sister but obviously there certain things I know about her sister through her

Mariangeles:
You deliberately ignored my question.
That says it all.

She talks to you about her sister, but you have a problem with her talking to her sister about you.
Just know this; you alone cannot be everything to her.
There are other people in her life that makes her who she is.
You don't even if it's the advice from that her sister that has kept your relationship going.
Her sister will always want what is best for her.

You see this post below, it is so true.

I dey try reason am too but what if the sister wan dey use style control am for marriage??
Whereas the sister and I have smooth relationship as well

Anijay1212:
Op come and see this 👆.
I have a feeling this could be the case here.
Don't try to fix what is not broken. Instead be grateful that you have confidencial go to person that she listens to in case of a protracted issue between you and your partner in future.

No she didn't.... But whenever we had misunderstanding her sister is the go to person she vomit everything to

Mariangeles:
Going by what you read, did she discuss you with her sister in a bad way?

I've been dating my woman since 2021 we did introduction recently and already fixed our wedding to next month
Yesterday, She gave me her phone to fix so I used the opportunity to go through her chats...
So, I went through her chats with her sister only to observe that she discussed almost everything we discussed within ourselves with her sister too unprovoked
Although I've always known that she and her sister who is happily married also used to be 5&6 but I never knew my fiancee could be spitting everything we talked to her sister just like that....
I went through their chats even though there's no toxic discussion about me between them
But I'm not fine at all with the fact she debates almost everything we talked about with her sister...
This lady Is everything a man could ask for, she's beautiful, hard working very decent and I met her a virgin
I've not spoken to her about it though I still don't know how best to go about it
I am very displeased

Still doesn't make sense... Her sister fit dey control am for marriage

Nowayback10:
You should be happy she is not even telling it to a guy.
Go and rest.

I've been dating my woman since 2021. We did introduction recently and already fixed our wedding to next month.

Yesterday, She gave me her phone to fix so I used the opportunity to go through her chats...
So, I went through her chats with her sister only to observe that she discussed almost everything we discussed within ourselves with her sister too unprovoked.

Although I've always known that she and her sister who is happily married also used to be 5&6 but I never knew my fiancee could be spitting everything we talked to her sister just like that....

I went through their chats even though there's no toxic discussion about me between them
But I'm not fine at all with the fact she debates almost everything we talked about with her sister...
This lady Is everything a man could ask for, she's beautiful, hard working very decent and I met her a virgin.

I've not spoken to her about it though I still don't know how best to go about it.

I am very displeased.

hustler2828:
I don't recommend quitting your government job for now. Although the pay is low, these jobs are quite secure, and there can be room for lapses like missing a day or 2, coming late to work, etc. I recommend having a good relationship with your seniors to create some room for your pen-testing career path.


That aside, I intend to learn cyber security and later on focus on pen-testing. Given so many learning platforms available I feel overwhelmed on which to pick and stick to. Can you recommend any or at least give me tips?

If you intend on learning cybersecurity under pen testing
You can use Portswigger web security academy to learn the basics

parcydrix:
I don't think this story is true. What website exactly did you bug hunt?

Hackerone... Hackerone pays as high as $25k for critical vulnerability

ChinemeremFidel:
If you are not too sure don't resign though..just make sure this new path is reliable..
I am into cyber security as well but a cloud security

My full time job is getting too busy these days ...
I have lesser time dedicated to this new path

ChinemeremFidel:
The decision is yours to make at the end of the day because you are the only one that knows what you want..
Whatever that can pay you 15k is worth your full concentration

Thank you.... I've been thinking about it too I just don't want to gamble it

Hi, Nairalanders
I'm a civil servant since 2016 I work in a federal Teaching Hospital and I earn 250k currently
I felt the need to earn more and I got into IT skill. Cybersecurity (Penetration tester) to be precise
So I've been doing bug bounty hunting for quite some months now
And I got my first huge payout last month through a platform called hackerone.com which is about $15k
Should I resign from civil service or just focus on this IT fully?
I'm confused at this stage and I need to make a decision asap
Thank you

rohangold:
Senior man. Try learn how to cope with the two.
Just try. I know it's hard but you can do it.

I work from 8 to 2pm morning shift and 2 to 6pm afternoon shift
Sometimes I get too busy at work

.

Hi, Nairalanders
I'm a civil servant since 2016 I work in a federal Teaching Hospital and I earn 250k currently
I felt the need to earn more and I got into IT skill. Cybersecurity (Penetration tester) to be precise
So I've been doing bug bounty hunting for quite some months now
And I got my first huge payout last month through a platform called hackerone.com which is about $15k
Should I resign from civil service or just focus on this IT fully?
I'm confused at this stage and I need to make a decision asap
Thank you

GreatVocalist:
Bro, just give her some space and see if she'll seek. If she doesn't, then move on.

Next time, you'll check your tempraments properly so you don't hurt someone with your words. People handle things differently.

48 hours after ignoring her I woke up to her message.... Lol

luvyaself95:
You don enter trap
But nigga give her space mek she miss you and if she doesn't.
Move fuckin on

I ignored her barely 48 hours I work up to her message this morning....
I still ignored her

anthonyuncle:
she has obviously relegated you to the lower league.

stop apologising, focus on yourself and hustle.

Bruh I realised that lately

iInjureHerYansh:
I also have the same experience recently. In this case I didn't drag I just move on with my life. I gave a time space of when she will contact me. She didn't contact tull elapsed.
Case closed.

I ignored her for 24 hours only and I woke up to her (hi) on whatsapp 😂

Afonjacrusder:
Honestly if you chat or plead with her again I won't be happy with you.

Bruh i deleted numbers, pictures
I moved on

ghettochild:
Deep down you know what to do n u r asking us

I knew what to do just throwing it up to know if I'm taking the right step

SenecaTheYonger:
No. Your chat will give us a clue. Most people chat like proper simps without knowing

Very unnecessary to screenshot chats here.
Let go bruhhh

SenecaTheYonger:
Can we see some of your chats? Especially the one she called u insecure

Lmao.... U kidding right

Donvalentino55:
That's a narcissist you're dealing with. Guilt tripping and gaslighting are their trademarks. Don't fall for such antics no more. Move on!
On the contrary, learn to manage your anger. Always keep your shits together especially when provoked by the opposite gender.
There's more to life than fighting a lost cause.

Thank you I moved on already

MechanicMike:
Are u gay sir? So u sayin u r gay BECUZ you behave like female but u need male masculine to help u be like man?....bro we don't understand you!!(no offenscce?)

It's not compulsory to comment... I asked for advise not insults

Black44:
her mind do dey the r/ship again
Bro u have been served breakfast
You need igbo and shayo

I saw it coming... Nah why I wan distance myself G

Sonnobax15:

Bro,give her small space make her brain for reset small..... Because the more you dey try to bring the relationship back to normalcy,she go just dey reason you like say you dey stalk her . Or probably too weak . Na so bannies be...very manipulative in nature..

I've been thinking of giving her the space t focus on more important things. I just wanted to be sure if the decision is right
Thank u

Afonjanistan:
Keep spending.
She will return once you go broke.

Anyway i only bought her stuff to pacify her. I stopped when I noticed it didn't even change a thing.
Already thinking of moving on and giving her space but I just wanted to be sure if it's the right decision for me
Thank u

doggedfighter:
Give her space.



Move on !

Already what I'm thinking of I just wanted to be sure if I'm thinking in the right direction
Thank u