₦airaland Forum

zed7:
It' has been said that we should concentrate on those who love us but in reality it isn't always easy, especially as there may be no attraction or chemistry whatsoever.

A wise adult shouldn't chase love. Look for whom likes you and you like in return. Look for chemistry and one who meets at least a good percentage of your requirements. Leave love for teenagers.

Lol! Hmm

Tayorshd2:
God bless u 100% I have tried this and it's working for me now..

The lady that I later married was a lady I like but not love but due toy experience Abt love so I forgot everything Abt it ... I just focus on compatibility.

But from d side of the girl to me she was too acttracted to me like she can do anything for me just to satisfy me .there was a time I want to end the game because she sees it iny eyes and my feelings that I like her but not love meaning we may not last..

Then she held my two hands and look into my eyes and called my name and said I really love u with passion with kiss 💋..
You know something came to my brain that since have found someone that really loved me then why can't I wait to develop my own for her too 🤔

But thank God after giving birth to a boy for me now the love has skyrocket from my heart too and she keeps loving me more more and more ...
Like anytime she sees me I am like an angel to her life ..

So in conclusion a man should forget love and look for campanion and campatibility later una go develop love if those things has been found..

Peace ✌️

Good read. It shows that love can be developed it can be built.

GeorgWashinton:
Another man might have been digging your wife steadily since your wedding night.


What you paid for, someone is getting it freely on a daily basis.


Be wise.

Hmm... When you find someone that loves you, it makes your loving in return easy.

GeorgWashinton:
Love does not exist anywhere in the world.

Love is a myth.

Love is a veil behind which women extort men.

Hmm. Reading your response, I know you have been through the pain. Yet, humans were created with the capacity to love.

Winterhaven:
Interesting read. I have been in this scenario in the past when i used to love. Now i realised that Nigerian women can't love, they are only interested in your pocket - this is their default mode and there is nothing anybody can do about it. So now, nothing like I'm falling in love, it's of no use.

Hmm. It can be hard though. But me I know you will still love when that one person with genuine interest for you for you show up.

I want to start like this, love is beautiful. And we humans were created with the heart to love. It is our nature, and there is nothing you or I can do about it.

So to those of us who have been through the receiving end of loving and not being loved, find comfort and find peace. And as I wrote above, we were created to love and be loved. You will find your own. The someone that will make your heart do "GRAGRIGRO"... Smiles😊

But Why is it so hard and so painful at the same time to truly love someone whose affection is with somebody else? Why does this happen?

You saw her, beautiful, smart, and caring. Every time you are around her she just makes you flustered. You don't why she has that much effect on you. But the more you try to make a move, you can see it written on the walls, " My heart is with someone else"

Whereas there is another who sees you, whose heart is warmed by your presence. But whom you choose not to see. Hmm!!!


It is a very sad state to be in. In this state, your eyes are completely blinded. So blinded that you will refuse to see the one who truly loves you right by your side.

Then I will ask again, do you pursue the one that loves you or keep pursuing the one you love but who does not see it? I have my comment on this but I will reserve it.

I know one thing about love, it can be built. It just takes an eye that can see something that will be the spark for that fire.


I believe in true love and I know that what is meant to be will be. So don't kill yourself.

I have been there I know what it is.

To others who have been there too, how was it? If I see your response, I know you did not die. How did you heal? How did you move on? Did you finally find love in the person who truly sees you for you?

Your response who knows might help someone else.

Uptheante:
As for me, my appetite is directly proportional to my mood.
Once a woman spoils my mood by annoying me, I automatically lose appetite for whatever she cooks.
I can decide to cook for myself or eat outside.
Let her understand the fact that I can comfortably do without eating her food & she has to adjust quickly or I replace her.
A woman should apologize sincerely when she offends her husband instead of trying to use food to cover up her bad behavior

True !!!

etrange:
Why is it extremely difficult to have a reasonable adult conversation with some males on this platform? Why do they type like tribal people or kids at best? These are the men the ladies will end up with as husbands? Wow.

Like seriously oh!!!

Gohs:
Now that we're talking about food....

Let's vote Peter Obi for president so we can have plenty food to cook!

Vote Labour Party

Lol!

DaCharis2016:
Why will I eat after she arrogantly asked me to fetch the food myself and serve myself?

Ahhhh! That is not nice at all. Maybe she is angry at something. Because what I wrote was you should not skip a good food prepared by your woman just because of an offense. There are better ways to resolve it. One major one is talk.

Zanxx:
I tell you. He keeps saying he is staying because of the children. My mom and aunts have advised him but he still insists on staying. I can’t live that way , I swear.

The best I think is for them to sort things out. Let them talk. He is not eating am also sure he is not also doing his inner chamber duties too. So staying because the children is not it. Those children is not your wife. They would one day leave. But this woman you once claimed you love and can't do without is your wife. He should not just stay. He should be humble to sort things out. My opinion.

Albertone:
Makes absolute sense. Thanks for this.

Hmm... This looks good. In my own opinion, Why would I assuming am a lady and keep giving you suggestions when I know you won't consider them? ?o even if what I suggested to you is the best for that situation, you will still do your mind.

Am of the opinion that your lady isn't in competition with you. So you should trust her to be a part of your decision. This is what effective communication should do. Mixing ideas and making a decision base on the best opinion. And this does not reduce your authority as the man.

MrDoGood:
You took it personal

Vawulence LoL!!!

highchief1:
do u know what they call disciplinary measures?

Who are you disciplining? Your wife? Ahhh you don't get the gist. She is not your younger sister or class student. She is your wife, she is your other half. You don't discipline someone who is supposed to be you. You communicate and resolve things.

highchief1:
let’s see ur response when u get married.this message is not for university students bro

Lol! I tell you.

highchief1:
u be off? why will u eat the food of someone u r not happy with? U Dey alright so?

You don't get it. The someone you are not happy with is your wife. The girl you claim you love. So she offended you. And you refuse her food. Why not talk it out and eat? Because you know she will still cook for you despite anything.

Buddha3:
When I'm upset, I completely lose appetite for food.

So all this yan no be am!

For how long?

JohnieWalker12:
Wow I know this your topic has met the reality in many marriages. Once our wife makes us provoke the next thing na to abandon her food and that thing can pain them ehn... But on the other hand, there is no food I have eaten outside that tastes as sweet as my wife's homemade food. One time for all the good cooking women out there

Thanks for this input. A mature man knows that to ignore your wife's hard sweet cooked food is not to do well just because she offended you. It's better you talk and resolve than ignore food.

mu2sa2:
Most men don't know that the worst insult to your wife is to refuse to eat her food. Even if you have a genuine reason not to eat much, take a little but never, never refuse to take your wife's food. Also, eat whatever she has prepared without complaining about the type of food or even the salt content. Reserve your comment for a later time.Women in every culture an d clime across the world are the same on this issue.

I stand with you.

pho:
That is if actually she begged, most ladies this days lack manners, even if you give most of them all the care they will still abuse you and find fault at you. For me if i actually see a woman who beg I will forgive but the thing is alot of ladis now are days will not beg o especially if God come bless am with little chenge for hands.

Hmm. But a sincere lady who truly loves you will apologize. She will beg. That I know.

shantti:
Please Which food are you really referring to?
Is it normal food like chin chin, fufu, beans etc
Or is it the other food, I call it the figurative food

Lol! Its the normal normal food.

Robenna:
Keep playing

Lol!!! Help me tell him oh! But I know he also just playing. Refusing to eat because you were angered instead of talking and resolving is not maturity. It's not just right. If you don't want to eat, tell her. Then talk. Don't then begin to give attitude and make life hell.

Bahamas95:
What is food? Nonsense!


I don't think about anything else when am really angry, not even sex can make me act stupid. I eat everyday so not eating her food for sometime won't take anything from me.

Hmm. But at least tell her not to cook for you so that she does not waste her time. But the point is that, when you truly love, offense truly comes, but to now withdraw from eating instead of talking it out is not the way. To now deny her sex is even more somehow...

Exceed15:
The food is my sweat in the first place.

I tell you. He now didn't eat. What will you do? You just got back to the dining table and there all your meal still covered and untouched.

Rocktation:
Well, people are different..because I really don't know how you can hurt me, if you refuse a meal I prepare. Far as I know, it's one cooking session less...for another meal time.

Lol! So how many times before he finally finishes his cooking card?

Zanxx:
It doesn’t always work that way and that person might have his reason for rejecting the food. Real life story, there is this man I know personally. He had issues with his wife but had that mentality of staying together for the sake of the kids. He got back from work one evening to meet his dinner served. He said immediately he saw the food, his instincts told him not to eat it. So he went out and gave the food to the dogs. In the morning all 3 dogs were dead. He confronted the wife and she confessed poisoning the food, while begging him not to tell anyone and that she wouldn’t do it again . He refused and told her family what she had done. Her family pleaded with him not to involve the police. Guess what, they are still together but he doesn’t eat or even drink water in that house. The money he gives is for the children.

Wow! This one is serious. Thank God for that instinct. In this case, the woman must have had series of things or offenses not resolved piled up in her to want to kill her husband. But am talking about just being human and your woman offends or angered you. You should not abandon her food because of that ... But this was worth the read.

Albertone:
How? Illustrations will do.

Two wrong does not make a right ooo... And this is the woman you love oh

Reelmii:
..eat wetin....first off ,, wen am angry she knows she is not souppsed to cook for me,,, i will cook myself....

E dey good make man sabi cook basic food...even if na noodles...run am


Not because say i dey fear poison oo...just that wen i dey vex,, i like my privacy 🤣🤣🤣

Oga you sure sey no be because you dey fear? The point is refusing food cooked does not solve the matter...

superCleanworks:
you are in NO POSITION and you have NO AUTHORITY to tell any man on this earth how, when and where to eat.
You are NOBODY to tell any man what to do in his house.
Even Solomon in all his wisdom and Jesus in all his glory did not give such RULES. Who are you?

True. But don't you think not eaten because you are angry is not the way to easing your anger? And it does not show maturity. This is your woman. Abandoning food because of offense is not it.

yomi007k:
He is a to-to worshiper. Look at his former threads. He can't think.


Imagine his personal text states ; " living daily for my lover".

Is he not FINISHED?

Lol!

BigBrother9ja:
Mumu
Not all these daughters of Jezebel of this generation...
Eat her, eat poison and DIE!
Few months after, she'll be riding another man while you rot underground.

STAY WOKE!

But she be your wife na? So because she offend you now she has also now become poison? No now!!! The matter is you are angry with something she did, does not eating her food solve the anger? That's my point though.

Fahvvy:
Food that I provided for, I shouldn't eat it because I'm upset? Lol ....

That will only happen if she returns back my money ...

And besides...
Why throw a tantrum when I can communicate my displeasure to her in ways that doesn't out my stomach or peni.le infrastructure at risk ....

Hmm. It's completely lack of maturity to abandon food because you are angry. So I agree with you. WHY THROW TANTRUM WHEN YOU CAN COMMUNICATE?