₦airaland Forum

Wow! I'm so in so let's go, its been a while I participated in the projects here have been very busy with my little shop I just opened trying to grow it into a bigger fashion house. Thanks aunty val for your mentoring God is taking you to a greater height beyond your imagination love you plenty.

EfemenaXY:
Well he certainly can't afford it. Not from what she painted. He's got too many more important projects to attend to.

If she can, then she should go for it. Like I said, privacy doesn't come cheap. So far, he's bearing all the financial bills and she isn't.

As per his mother, there is no MIL / DIL issue there. His mother sees not just the here and now, but also the future as per what's priority and what isn't. She is right and it shouldn't cause any problems. If this lady can't bear the thought of living with him in his family home till that house is completed, and she won't bring forth that 70K to get her much coveted private accommodation, then she should consider waiting till their financial situation has improved.

your submssion really made me laugh. Here what we have now is like a scale of preference and he has really weighed all the options and taken the decision to get the apartment.

babyosisi:
Ok then
Have you fixed a wedding date?

Whatever you do,you must be in your own place from day one of marriage ( rental of your own property)
Never make the mistake of living in your inlaw's house with your new husband
You cannot start a marriage off that way

Thanks for your advice, I was actually very scared of starting a marriage off that way I donteven mind staying ina room apartment with him to avoid stories that touch the heart. But I'm glad the decision he took was his own cause I belivied he is seeing things from that angle too. The wedding date has not been fixed yet.

EfemenaXY:
Your fiancee as you say, is a low income earner - so it makes perfect sense that he lives with his parents to save up and cut back on unnecessary expenditure as much as he possible can. He's also got quite a lot of projects going on which needs a lot of financial input too.

~ He's building a house for you both. Your future home, and that is no small feat.

~ He hasn't got any household appliances / furnishings for the house when completed and that too requires money.

~ You want to get married (Court, church, and traditional wedding) I presume and that too will cost money

The way I see it, the poor man is overloaded with financial costs and rather than support him, you at the ripe old age of 31 begrudge him for not spending his meagre resources on a privately rented apartment for you both. Little wonder he turned to his mother for advice and she didn't fail him.

Look, I understand your need for privacy, but privacy doesn't come cheap. You're working aren't you? So which of these projects have/are you assisting him with? Why does he have to bear the whole load on his shoulders? You act like money grows on trees and you even had the guts to mention unashamedly that he came into some money but rather than spend it on your "want", he's decided to hold back having discussed with his mum.

If you really, really, do want your privacy, then you bring forth the 70K to pay for that apartment. Let the poor man concentrate on completing his building. Your future family home. I also think that as a mature, working woman, you should start looking to furnishing your home with the appliances you say you lack.

Even in the wild, the male builds the house while the female decorates it to her taste. You aren't a naive twenty something year old fresh out of Uni, but a mature woman. So please act your age and support your man. As he focuses on completing the house and footing the wedding bills, you dip your hands into your pocket and assist him with something substantial.

To say your post annoys me is an understatement.

Thanks, but the mum is not saying he should bring me to her house after the wedding but that he should wait and finish the house before going ahead with our plans although she gave it as an advice not that she is enforcing it on him, as for what I'm contributing, I will also contribute my own qouta but my fiance doesn't really like me doing what he is supposed to do as the man as in he sees getting the apartment and furnishing it as his responsibility as the man but I'm going to buy the kitchen utensils. The building project is just a little above the foundation level and the available money can't even be enough to finish the project.

babyosisi:
Great
Its the 70k house 70k a year's rent?

The. 70k is for a year's rent.

Thanks for all the replys, I asked him now what was his reply to his mum he said he didn't say anything but I think he has made up his mind to get d house I just hope the mum won't be thinking I'm the. One behind his decision cause its too early to be having issues with MIL.

Thanks thorpido, he seems to be behaving like a mummy's boy I am really upsett when he told me too I'm just trying to keep my Cool cause he has over stayed in his parent house his two younger brothers had left the house for long but I'm still waiting for his decision on the issue cause if he didn't get that apartment, it will definately extend our marriage. Plan I'm just confused now.

Good morning everyone, have been folloing this thread for a while now but I wanted to finish reading all the pages before I acknowledge the op and everyone that has contributed so far cause have learnt a lot here but I have a pressing issue to attend to now pls I really need your candid advice on this issue. My fiance stays in his parent house but he is dohouse project but I feel he should rent an apartment now since we a planning to get married before the end of the year, he is a low income earner but he has an access to some cash recently and fortunately we are able to get a room and a parlour self contained yesterday for 70k we were about going to see d lanlord for payement when he said I should let him inform his mum first before he pay which I said ok. He called me this morning that his mum said he y can't he wait and finish his house first and move there from there house, the problem I have with her idear is that the money e have is not enough to finish the house and also do the wedding besides my fiance does not have any house appliances he will have to furnish the house as well I don't know what to tell him now and I don't want to be in between mother and son. I will be 31 soon and he is already 34years

Yes! Onari I still have her picture on my phone I can never forget her she inspired me a lot, I'm doing fashion designing today cause she encouraged me never to give up on my dream when I wanted to. Thank God Efosal started this too we never knew onari won't stayed long on sew along thread, she is doing this as a legacy cause we would have long forgotten about online training I'm sure onari will be smilling in her grave now. I'm just so happy her lagacy leaves on God will contineu to bless u Efosal, this is ur project and its also onari's project

Happy new year to Efosal and everyone in the house.