₦airaland Forum

bdchange:
sorry to tell you this, your family is in dissarray. And you seems not to know your left from your right as well. A person above 18 is an adult and should bear the consequences of their actions. The earlier you understand this, the better your life becomes. Men of these days are so weak, how then can they raise a fearful and discipline children. God help this generation of weak men everywhere.

johnkey:
weak men everywhere, at this my age sef my mama no fit follow me reason nonsense talkless of when I reach 32. As long as you give your mom and dad money for their upkeep, I see no reason why you should act like a dumb hypnotized chicken. Imagine 40+ year old man and she's still sleeping with him, lol sorry to say but you are a family of fools. pray tell, you attend Lord's Chosen, right?

anthonyuncle:
you better stop whatever you are doing for her and that child.
it is not wickedness, it is you being fair.

1. they will never be satisfied and it won't make her(your sister) change.

2. the little respect your family is giving you is because you are now made (without their support and influence)

3. (God forbid!) if you go broke tomorrow, they will show you hell.

start focusing on yourself more.

if you are still living in the family house, move out and get your own apartment.

start investing your money in things that can secure a better future for you and your children.
buy landed properties.
advance your education - go for masters and other advance studies.
sponsor the enrollment of people for apprenticeship.
take yourself out and relax more frequently.

peepydelano:
Bad advise,very bad advise.This is how you self acclaimed good African people drives people into depression with your holier than thou attitudes. He has his own life to live and as such he should totally cut off from responsibilities and people who do not appreciate him for his own mental balance.QED

DonEd:
Its not ur obligation.

Just do ur best as a brother and uncle.

A person standing on one foot doesnt carry someone on his back.

kendological:
Your comments shows that you really came from a foolish home.

Richy4:
This story is just too annoying to be honest…. If I should say what’s on my mind now, It will be …..

I will only say that you should take the money that you have with u, rent a house somewhere so that you won’t be seeing, hearing and listening to iniquities …

Before you do that, meet/call the irresponsible father of that kid, Ask him that his son will son be in Nursery school. what's his plans... Since your sister cannot say it then say it on her behalf...Tell him to contribute that it takes two to make babies... If your sister confronts you, and insinuates that you should mind your business and not interfere , then that's the perfect excuse to leave that house and strictly mind your business...

kendological:
Thanks, I live alone, when I said the man is irresponsible, it was an understatement. He has no place of his own, he squats with friends, no job , let me not spill everything.

Karleb:
Oga don't let your parents use your head.

Don't train that child. He's not yours.

If the child's parent are old enough to have sex, then they are old enough to shoulder the responsibilities.

You won't die if you disrespect your parents. You are not their puppy.

...maybe they don't really love like you think.

Ammishaddai:
My dear brother, there is a proverb that says " you can choose your friends; but you cannot choose your family ". So my advice is this :

1. You are Nancy's brother, and as it stands she is your sister ; you cannot turn your back on her irrespective of her behavior : you shall surely help her.

2. Do not look at the grudges you have against Nancy, for that would deny the child the right to an education. Remember, she is a victim of a situation that is beyond her control

3. You need Jesus. Forget what your mother has done. For if you follow the dictates of men and what men do, you will never serve God, and that would certainly do you more harm than good.


Peace

kendological:
She does not stay in my apartment , I live close to my parents apartment, partly for my father's sake, and partly for mine. she stays with my mother.
In fact, my mother is the primary nurse of the child, I always protest she leave Nancy to play her role as a mother. She cannot respect her parents. I have told my father to send Nancy out of his home if she cannot abide by his rules, then he told me she has nowhere to go and she is still his blood, like I don't know.

AishaYesufu:
Your father can't send her away but... he errs by indulging her irresponsible behavior.

As for the child's education, do whatever is in your mind

AishaYesufu:
This kind of advice can only come from a woman.

OP disregard

AishaYesufu:
This kind of advice can only come from a woman.

OP disregard

kendological:
Lol.
My elder sister has been giving me the same advice, last Sunday my mother came to discuss some issues with me, she brought up complaints about Nancy, I told her to drop the matter, she was telling me she is still my sister.
I am the only one always being admonished to be nice.
Pure white blackmail.

kendological:
Thanks, when I told him to send her away, it is a way of resetting her brain. If she sees that seriousness, she will start responding to instructions.

My father raised about half of the money I used in starting up my business. I am his treasurer anyways, I keep things in trust for him and he is my most trusted person, followed by the young chap in the university. But where Nancy is concerned my father loses his logical self.

I told him to his face to put things in order, and not create issues for me to inherit.

kendological:
Thanks, I live alone, when I said the man is irresponsible, it was an understatement. He has no place of his own, he squats with friends, no job , let me not spill everything.

All I can tell you is to give money to your parent for their upkeep as always........ whatever they do with it, just act like it's not your business....
For example, If it was #10 you give every month, make sure it's just that amount... If they like, let them use it to train the kid.. If they ask for money for the kid, tell them that your sister is old enough to work she should find a job.... if she's old enough to get pregnant... she should be old enough to face what goes with it

If you wanna go overboard, Tell your parent that you are saving for your wife's bride price... that you too are old enough to have your own kids and Family.. .

foreveryoung1515:
If care is not taking, she's coming home with a second pregnancy soon. As for you, don't start what you can't finish, thos type of sister won't give your wife a breathing space if you renege on your responsibility on the baby. Y"all indulged her too much.

kendological:
Mr strong man, do you always have everything figured out? Seeking for opinion to have a balanced view is not weakness.

foreveryoung1515:
If care is not taking, she's coming home with a second pregnancy soon. As for you, don't start what you can't finish, thos type of sister won't give your wife a breathing space if you renege on your responsibility on the baby. Y"all indulged her too much.

Klass99:
Please do not listen to anyone who tells you blood is thicker than water.

A man's worse enemies are from within his own household - na bible talk am not me.

Why have you taken on responsibility that isn't yours in the past? When Nancy and her baby daddy are not cripples incapable of doing honest work to cater for their child?

bdchange:
Let me simplify it for you. There are 3 set of people in this case that is causing nuisance to the society. Firstly the said girl, who opens her leg to every tom and dicks available so she could get laid. Secondly the supposedly impregnator who goes about putting his dick in every hole available just to test his manhood and bring miscreants to the world because he will never be responsible. Thirdly the poster who doesn't know how to make his stand and let people be aware that they are responsible for what they create. Believe me if this three set of people dont exist, then we can be dreaming of a better society. Lastly becuase we have sympathisers like you who refused to call a spade what it is then we are in a long shit in this country since we have many of your category out there.

Richy4:
[color=#000099]All I can tell you is to give money to your parent for their upkeep as always........ whatever they do with it, just act like it's not your business....
For example, If it was #10 you give every month, make sure it's just that amount... If they like, let them use it to train the kid.. If they ask for money for the kid, tell them that your sister is old enough to work she should find a job.... if she's old enough to get pregnant... she should be old enough to face what goes with it

If you wanna go overboard, Tell your parent that you are saving for your wife's bride price... that you too are old enough to have your own kids and Family..

kendological:
I already told my parents to prepare for that, although I took her to a hospital, some months after giving birth, where she was put through a family planning procedure, I think that will last up to 3 years plus. She keeps a card for that.
Nobody then agreed to take her to the hospital then, because they want to keep their "good names".

I have never indulged her, she fears no one like she fears me. Sometimes I dealt with her without caring about our parents, but these days I really don't care about her any more, without my parents influence, I wouldn't be making this post, but I think, I will let them drink from the cup they served me for years.

kendological:
You are so right!
I currently live alone in a 2 room apartment, not far from my parents place. I pay my rent.
When my younger brother comes back from school he prefers to stay in my place, he is a nice and respectful young man, and a repented Christian.
My father has really been there for me as a father, if not for him I would have rented an apartment far from home, he is aging, but that cannot cancel the role he played in Nancy's life.