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Six Signs You're The Selfish Partner - Romance - Nairaland

Nairaland ForumNairaland GeneralRomanceSix Signs You're The Selfish Partner (751 Views)

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Six Signs You're The Selfish Partner by eneazi(op): 7:48am On Jul 10, 2021
Relationships should be a 50/50 split where both partners meet in the middle, taking and giving equally.

But, if you're exclusively concerned about yourself and have zero regards for your partner's needs it becomes negative and psychologically unhealthy.

Being the selfish one means you receive without giving in return, and think your partner needs you more than you need them. The purpose of this post is to help you turn the tide around and focus on your partner's emotions and needs if you're the self absorbed one in your 'ship.'


1) You're Unaware of your Partner's Needs

In order for balance to exist in any relationship, it is important you pay attention to your partner's needs, but in a situation where you consistently put your needs ahead of your partner's and expect them to constantly do things for you, there is bound to be a problem.

The point is, If you're unaware of your partner's needs, and would rather take than give and find nothing wrong with your one sided agreement, then there is a good amount of selfishness sprinkled all over you.


2) You're Emotionally Unavailable

I am aware that some people hold back emotions and give a tiny fraction in bid of protecting their hearts, as a result of past trauma from relationships.

Sometimes, this post traumatic stress disorder can cause a person to be genuinely fearful of letting their feelings show, even when its obvious their partner's feeling are pure and unharmful.

As long as you're in a relationship, it is important you're emotionally available. Remember expressing your emotions does not make you vulnerable or weak, but rather will make your partner feel safe with you emotionally.


3) You're Overly Critical of Your Partner

You belittle, look down and criticize your partner's interest, values, beliefs and acts unpleasant towards their families and friends.

Judging your partner's every move directly and indirectly, comparing them to others will make them lose confidence in themselve and result in low self esteem where they feel every other person is better than them.

4) You're a Manipulator

This generally refers to a person who seeks to control situations and circumstances.

As a selfish partner your manipulative skills come to play when you feel the best way of handling any situation is your way, and this includes meeting your needs.

As a manipulative person, you most times use your partner's fear against them, you blow up and even withdraw affection If your needs are not met thereby, pushing your partner to do things that solely benefits you even against their wish.

5) Everything Revolves Around You

Simply put, you're the bossy one, and act like the solar system revolves around you.
You seldom check up with your partner in matters that clearly requires a joint decision, and when such wrong decision backfires it's against your unspoken commandment to take responsibility for your actions.

You're self centered and only think about yourself, and always want to put you first, you're only happy when things are done your way.

And as most selfish people your satisfaction is priority while your partner's is neglected.


6) You Play the Victim Card

You crave your partner's attention in a way and constantly look for sympathy. You consciously and unconsciously drive your partner to the wall by blowing hot and cold, giving and retrieving. When your partner decides to take the back seat because of your mixed messages, you play on their emotions making them feel they've committed a crime against humanity.

If you're a self-absorbed energy sucker who is obsessed with receiving attention and not giving, then you're toxic to your partner.
Re: Six Signs You're The Selfish Partner by detectivejones: 8:22am On Jul 10, 2021
You're right as always
Re: Six Signs You're The Selfish Partner by Lovebliss2(f): 1:47pm On Jul 10, 2021
eneazi:
Relationships should be a 50/50 split where both partners meet in the middle, taking and giving equally.

But, if you're exclusively concerned about yourself and have zero regards for your partner's needs it becomes negative and psychologically unhealthy.

Being the selfish one means you receive without giving in return, and think your partner needs you more than you need them. The purpose of this post is to help you turn the tide around and focus on your partner's emotions and needs if you're the self absorbed one in your 'ship.'


1) You're Unaware of your Partner's Needs

In order for balance to exist in any relationship, it is important you pay attention to your partner's needs, but in a situation where you consistently put your needs ahead of your partner's and expect them to constantly do things for you, there is bound to be a problem.

The point is, If you're unaware of your partner's needs, and would rather take than give and find nothing wrong with your one sided agreement, then there is a good amount of selfishness sprinkled all over you.


2) You're Emotionally Unavailable

I am aware that some people hold back emotions and give a tiny fraction in bid of protecting their hearts, as a result of past trauma from relationships.

Sometimes, this post traumatic stress disorder can cause a person to be genuinely fearful of letting their feelings show, even when its obvious their partner's feeling are pure and unharmful.

As long as you're in a relationship, it is important you're emotionally available. Remember expressing your emotions does not make you vulnerable or weak, but rather will make your partner feel safe with you emotionally.


3) You're Overly Critical of Your Partner

You belittle, look down and criticize your partner's interest, values, beliefs and acts unpleasant towards their families and friends.

Judging your partner's every move directly and indirectly, comparing them to others will make them lose confidence in themselve and result in low self esteem where they feel every other person is better than them.

4) You're a Manipulator

This generally refers to a person who seeks to control situations and circumstances.

As a selfish partner your manipulative skills come to play when you feel the best way of handling any situation is your way, and this includes meeting your needs.

As a manipulative person, you most times use your partner's fear against them, you blow up and even withdraw affection If your needs are not met thereby, pushing your partner to do things that solely benefits you even against their wish.

5) Everything Revolves Around You

Simply put, you're the bossy one, and act like the solar system revolves around you.
You seldom check up with your partner in matters that clearly requires a joint decision, and when such wrong decision backfires it's against your unspoken commandment to take responsibility for your actions.

You're self centered and only think about yourself, and always want to put you first, you're only happy when things are done your way.

And as most selfish people your satisfaction is priority while your partner's is neglected.


6) You Play the Victim Card

You crave your partner's attention in a way and constantly look for sympathy. You consciously and unconsciously drive your partner to the wall by blowing hot and cold, giving and retrieving. When your partner decides to take the back seat because of your mixed messages, you play on their emotions making them feel they've committed a crime against humanity.

If you're a self-absorbed energy sucker who is obsessed with receiving attention and not giving, then you're toxic to your partner.
Very correct
1 Reply

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