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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn (2663 Views)
Nairalanders Please Help, My First Son Is Behaving Somehow / How Do I Stop Behaving Like My Dad / Mummy Has Calmed Down And Boy Is Smiling In Short Interview After (2) (3) (4)
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Hathor5(f): 11:35am On Jul 30, 2021 |
MufasaLion: That's the only way they know. Some people have even attacked the OP for asking how to handle the child like it is a crime to ask for alternatives to beating. Nigerians don't like any kind of progress. 1 Like |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Hathor5(f): 11:35am On Jul 30, 2021 |
ThothHermes: Really? So all these armed robbers and ritualists were not spanked as children? 1 Like |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by MufasaLion: 11:49am On Jul 30, 2021 |
Hathor5: Some Nigerians are just dumb! Beating doesn't change anything just like putting hardened criminals in the box doesn't change anything. It toughens 'em more, but that doesn't mean criminals shouldn't be jailed. However, this little child's tantrums/anger can be controlled without beating. |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Mindlog: 11:54am On Jul 30, 2021 |
MufasaLion: Many Nigerians believe beating the child is the magical solution when there are tons of resources online to better manage such behaviour. |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by MufasaLion: 12:04pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Mindlog: Exactly! Nigerians are among the reason most Nigeiran Psychologist and Therapist don't have clients. Some Nigerians would rather beat the hell out if the kids and some go to the extreme of taking their wards/children to a policeman, vigilate, relatives to beat the crap out of them. As a child I understood myself that I hate being beating or shouted at. I could remember I saw beating as wickedness and sign of hatred. I was never a bad child, but I hated beating. Till now, I detest beating of children, maids etc. I believe more in having conversations than beating. 1 Like |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Mindlog: 12:13pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
MufasaLion: I will have clients when I eventually decide to set up practice in Nigeria! Beatings do not reform as intended but rather represses to generate blind submission and in most times, only for it to resurface when no longer under the control of the authoritarian figure . 1 Like |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by MufasaLion: 12:17pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Mindlog: You a shrink? |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Mindlog: 12:20pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by MufasaLion: 12:22pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Mindlog: Really? That's nice! I'm just good at conversations but not a shrink. |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Mindlog: 12:25pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
MufasaLion: Being a conversationalist is a skill. |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by MufasaLion: 12:28pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Mindlog: Damn straight! |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Hathor5(f): 12:36pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
MufasaLion: bold Yes! |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Hathor5(f): 12:38pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Mindlog: This is what I have learned when I moved abroad. The oyinbo kids would behave even in the absence of their parents whereas our children have only learned to do the right thing under observation. Once the threat of punishment is gone, they are out of control. They were only taught to avoid punishment, not moral reasoning. 1 Like |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by MufasaLion: 12:40pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Hathor5: I hope many people get to realize that I had an argument with someone couple of months back about buying expensive to us for kids and he was of the opinion that expensive kids doesn't prepare the kids for the future, doesn't give them morals or whatever. I had to tell him that there are tons of expensive educative toys you could buy for your kids. Africans believe you have to be harsh towards kids while the West have different view on that. I believe you can raise your kids and they will grow to become changemakers without depriving them of the basic things that will let them actualize their goals. There are many kids abroad that have turned their hobbies to something we all are proud of now globally. In an average African home/community they tend to deprive kids of things and most especially deny them the opportunity to explore their hobbies. Now, people are getting to realize that football is lucrative hence the reason some sport professionals are setting up Sport Academy etc. |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Hathor5(f): 12:41pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
MufasaLion: I am afraid they will continue to quote the Bible to justify violence against children. 1 Like |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Mindlog: 12:52pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Hathor5: What has Nigeria benefitted from the beatings majority of Nigerians received during their childhood...... the beatings like drums, like criminals.....attempted murder? Has the beatings made majority of Nigerians trustworthy in personal life and business? Has it infused ethical thinking in us? With the level of dysfunctionalities in many families, crime rate and insecurity.... beatings has not worked for Nigeria! 1 Like |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by MufasaLion: 12:54pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Hathor5: Devil is always the culprit |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by MufasaLion: 12:55pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Mindlog: It doesn't work anywhere! |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Mindlog: 12:58pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
MufasaLion: Well we tend to believe our beatings is so unique, that it makes you stand out in the world! 2 Likes |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by MufasaLion: 1:02pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Mindlog: African parents always use that beating and being feared to nurse their ego. I don't even fear anybody in this world, not even my parents but I respect them. Beating kids these days is like filling up a basket. |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Mindlog: 1:05pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
MufasaLion: It is a waste of time and energy! 1 Like |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Hathor5(f): 1:23pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Mindlog: And yet you will always hear/read the 'spare the rod, spoil the child' misconception left, right and center. As if it has helped raise the best behaved, most honest, least corrupt human beings on earth. |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by cococandy(f): 1:46pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
So we are okay with beating babies now? 2 Likes |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by cococandy(f): 1:49pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Hathor5: 100 % That’s every single one of us that was raised with cane and beatings. It doesn’t teach you to be a good person. After you grow up, you have to retrain yourself to act properly for the sake of itself not just to avoid getting punished. 2 Likes |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by MufasaLion: 1:49pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Mindlog: Abso-fvcking-lutely! |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Hathor5(f): 2:06pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
cococandy: Exactly. However, bringing children up to have this kind of integrity requires a reorientation, time, energy, mental and emotional strength and a whole lot of self-discipline because it doesn't come natural to those of us who were raised with cane and beatings. Corporal punishment is the laziest and least creative form of upbringing. |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by SonofGod231: 3:11pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
In my experience,It is normal for kids to throw tantrums especially when they feel they have options to choose from and then display their displeasure and when a normally well behaved child starts having tantrums completely out of the blue,they are trying to tell you something that they cannot put into words. It is important to listen to them. |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by myforty68: 3:49pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
watch super nanny and learn |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by myforty68: 3:50pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
watch supernanny and learn |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Assumptabeke(f): 9:01pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
gfon: Lion nor dey born goat. |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by Assumptabeke(f): 9:02pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
gfon: Lion nor dey born goat. |
Re: My 18months Old Boy Is Behaving Stubborn by ThothHermes: 9:17pm On Jul 30, 2021 |
Hathor5 post=1042448q43:Not early enough. |
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