MufasaLion:
So beating is the best option? The way y'all reason is just myopic.

That's the only way they know. Some people have even attacked the OP for asking how to handle the child like it is a crime to ask for alternatives to beating. Nigerians don't like any kind of progress.

ThothHermes:
Na talk be this one? This is how people grow to become nuisance to society.

Proverbs 22:15
Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of correction will drive it far from him.

Really? So all these armed robbers and ritualists were not spanked as children?

Hathor5:


That's the only way they know. Some people have even attacked the OP for asking how to handle the child like it is a crime to ask for alternatives to beating. Nigerians don't like any kind of progress.

Some Nigerians are just dumb! Beating doesn't change anything just like putting hardened criminals in the box doesn't change anything. It toughens 'em more, but that doesn't mean criminals shouldn't be jailed.

However, this little child's tantrums/anger can be controlled without beating.

MufasaLion:


Some Nigerians are just dumb! Beating doesn't change anything just like putting hardened criminals in the box doesn't change anything. It toughens 'em more, but that doesn't mean criminals shouldn't be jailed.

However, this little child's tantrums/anger can be controlled without beating.

Many Nigerians believe beating the child is the magical solution when there are tons of resources online to better manage such behaviour.

Mindlog:


Many Nigerians believe beating the child is the magical solution when there are tons of resources online to better manage such behaviour.

Exactly! Nigerians are among the reason most Nigeiran Psychologist and Therapist don't have clients. Some Nigerians would rather beat the hell out if the kids and some go to the extreme of taking their wards/children to a policeman, vigilate, relatives to beat the crap out of them.

As a child I understood myself that I hate being beating or shouted at. I could remember I saw beating as wickedness and sign of hatred. I was never a bad child, but I hated beating. Till now, I detest beating of children, maids etc.

I believe more in having conversations than beating.

MufasaLion:


Exactly! Nigerians are among the reason most Nigeiran Psychologist and Therapist don't have clients. Some Nigerians would rather beat the hell out if the kids and some go to the extreme of taking their wards/children to a policeman, vigilate, relatives to beat the crap out of them.

As a child I understood myself that I hate being beating or shouted at. I could remember I saw beating as wickedness and sign of hatred. I was never a bad child, but I hated beating. Till now, I detest beating of children, maids etc.

I believe more in having conversations than beating.

I will have clients when I eventually decide to set up practice in Nigeria!

Beatings do not reform as intended but rather represses to generate blind submission and in most times, only for it to resurface when no longer under the control of the authoritarian figure .

Mindlog:


I will have clients when I eventually decide to set up practice in Nigeria!

Beatings do not reform as intended but rather represses to generate blind submission, only for it to resurface when no longer under the control of the authoritarian figure .

You a shrink?

MufasaLion:


You a shrink?

Doing my specialty in clinical child psychology.

Mindlog:




Doing my specialty in clinical child psychology.

Really? That's nice!
I'm just good at conversations but not a shrink.

MufasaLion:


Really? That's nice!
I'm just good at conversations but not a shrink.

Being a conversationalist is a skill.

Mindlog:


Being a conversationalist is a skill.

Damn straight!

MufasaLion:


Some Nigerians are just dumb! Beating doesn't change anything just like putting hardened criminals in the box doesn't change anything. It toughens 'em more, but that doesn't mean criminals shouldn't be jailed.

However, this little child's tantrums/anger can be controlled without beating.

bold

Yes!

Mindlog:


I will have clients when I eventually decide to set up practice in Nigeria!

Beatings do not reform as intended but rather represses to generate blind submission and in most times, only for it to resurface when no longer under the control of the authoritarian figure.

This is what I have learned when I moved abroad. The oyinbo kids would behave even in the absence of their parents whereas our children have only learned to do the right thing under observation. Once the threat of punishment is gone, they are out of control. They were only taught to avoid punishment, not moral reasoning.

Hathor5:


bold

Yes!

I hope many people get to realize that

I had an argument with someone couple of months back about buying expensive to us for kids and he was of the opinion that expensive kids doesn't prepare the kids for the future, doesn't give them morals or whatever. I had to tell him that there are tons of expensive educative toys you could buy for your kids.

Africans believe you have to be harsh towards kids while the West have different view on that. I believe you can raise your kids and they will grow to become changemakers without depriving them of the basic things that will let them actualize their goals.

There are many kids abroad that have turned their hobbies to something we all are proud of now globally. In an average African home/community they tend to deprive kids of things and most especially deny them the opportunity to explore their hobbies. Now, people are getting to realize that football is lucrative hence the reason some sport professionals are setting up Sport Academy etc.

MufasaLion:


I hope many people get to realize that

I am afraid they will continue to quote the Bible to justify violence against children.

Hathor5:


I am afraid they will continue to quote the Bible to justify violence against children.

What has Nigeria benefitted from the beatings majority of Nigerians received during their childhood...... the beatings like drums, like criminals.....attempted murder?

Has the beatings made majority of Nigerians trustworthy in personal life and business? Has it infused ethical thinking in us?

With the level of dysfunctionalities in many families, crime rate and insecurity.... beatings has not worked for Nigeria!

Hathor5:


I am afraid they will continue to quote the Bible to justify violence against children.

Devil is always the culprit

Mindlog:


What has Nigeria benefitted from the beatings majority of Nigerians received during their childhood...... the beatings like drums, like criminals.....attempted murder?

Has the beatings made majority of Nigerians trustworthy in personal life and business? Has it infused ethical thinking in us?

With the level of dysfunctionalities in many families, crime rate and insecurity.... beatings has not worked for Nigeria!

It doesn't work anywhere!

MufasaLion:


It doesn't work anywhere!

Well we tend to believe our beatings is so unique, that it makes you stand out in the world!

Mindlog:


Well we tend to believe our beatings is so unique, that it makes you stand out in the world!

African parents always use that beating and being feared to nurse their ego. I don't even fear anybody in this world, not even my parents but I respect them.

Beating kids these days is like filling up a basket.

MufasaLion:


African parents always use that beating and being feared to nurse their ego. I don't even fear anybody in this world, not even my parents but I respect them.

Beating kids these days is like filling up a basket.

It is a waste of time and energy!

Mindlog:


What has Nigeria benefitted from the beatings majority of Nigerians received during their childhood...... the beatings like drums, like criminals.....attempted murder?

Has the beatings made majority of Nigerians trustworthy in personal life and business? Has it infused ethical thinking in us?

With the level of dysfunctionalities in many families, crime rate and insecurity.... beatings has not worked for Nigeria!

And yet you will always hear/read the 'spare the rod, spoil the child' misconception left, right and center.

As if it has helped raise the best behaved, most honest, least corrupt human beings on earth.

So we are okay with beating babies now?

Hathor5:

Once the threat of punishment is gone, they are out of control. They were only taught to avoid punishment, not moral reasoning.

100 %

That’s every single one of us that was raised with cane and beatings. It doesn’t teach you to be a good person. After you grow up, you have to retrain yourself to act properly for the sake of itself not just to avoid getting punished.

Mindlog:


It is a waste of time and energy!

Abso-fvcking-lutely!

cococandy:


100 %

That’s every single one of us that was raised with cane and beatings. It doesn’t teach you to be a good person. After you grow up, you have to retrain yourself to act properly for the sake of itself not just to avoid getting punished.

Exactly. However, bringing children up to have this kind of integrity requires a reorientation, time, energy, mental and emotional strength and a whole lot of self-discipline because it doesn't come natural to those of us who were raised with cane and beatings.

Corporal punishment is the laziest and least creative form of upbringing.

In my experience,It is normal for kids to throw tantrums especially when they feel they have options to choose from and then display their displeasure and when a normally well behaved child starts having tantrums completely out of the blue,they are trying to tell you something that they cannot put into words. It is important to listen to them.

watch super nanny and learn

watch supernanny and learn

gfon:
Beat am small wen he misbehaves,but don't beat him till he starts to fear you and become a weakling,a man is suppose to have a bit of stubborness in him.I get strong head,i wouldn't expect less from my boy likewise.

Lion nor dey born goat.

gfon:
Beat am small wen he misbehaves,but don't beat him till he starts to fear you and become a weakling,a man is suppose to have a bit of stubborness in him. I get strong head,i wouldn't expect less from my boy likewise.

Lion nor dey born goat.

Hathor5 post=1042448q43:


Really? So all these armed robbers and ritualists were not spanked as children?

Not early enough.