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Marrying Last As First Child - Family (6) - Nairaland

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Re: Marrying Last As First Child by Newboss(m): 2:28pm On Aug 09, 2021
yanabasee1:
If all the children in your family have gotten married and began to raise a family and you don't seems to bother about it.....than you are yet to grow up.... You still have a childish mentality...


No one is forcing you to get married... But marriage shows that one has gotten to a stage in their life that they'd begin to take responsibility....

Being a man isn't just sleeping around with different girls... but going to get a woman traditionally to become your wife .


Go and marry and gettat from here....

Marriage does not show anything. Stop following the crowd. Take charge of your life

1 Like

Re: Marrying Last As First Child by CryptoRepublic1: 2:40pm On Aug 09, 2021
Don't jump into marriage, marriage ain't worth it anymore.

I won't get married if I can change back the time.

There's nothing in it for men.
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by Oshokalo: 2:43pm On Aug 09, 2021
scrolldown88:


I totally disagree with this. Marriage is not a standard to measure maturity or how responsible a person is. I'm not endorsing the OP play boy behavior, however there's lot of single people who are more responsible than some married folks. There's also a lot of married Playboy's, would you say they are highly responsible on account of them being married?
Besides this days we see people just in and out of married, or father children they can't care for, will you call that being matured/responsible?
And why most you take responsibility for another person. It's hard enough taking responsibility for your self and your immediate family. You can't shame a person for refusing to take up a leech.
Lol. So single men are not men because they aren't married?
This uneccessary pressure put on young people is the reason why we have broken homes littered all over.
true, I have heard this nonsense before, somebody told me am still a boy because am not married yet
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by mechanics(m): 2:53pm On Aug 09, 2021
Take your time and stop all forms distraction that's hindering you from getting married.
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by 2kurupt(m): 3:28pm On Aug 09, 2021
michlins:
It's all good until you start raising kids when others are planning retirement.


Get married when you are young especially when you have the resources. Raising children is one hell of serious venture. You need all your skills and resources to be topnotch
Words on marble.

This is what people forming woke and always copying the West would fail to tell you. They only copy the negative aspect of things
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by MummyD2020(f): 3:34pm On Aug 09, 2021
Chuky7:


Thanks bro

I tell you that idea of staying with an unknown girl all your life is frightening.

What happens if you don't like her presence anymore or she becomes a pest do I just leave her like that?

What makes u think the feeling is not mutual? She may even end up getting fed up of u first. Unknown girl u say? What happens to dating first or courting?From the look of things, u aint serious sef. U sound like u are doing someone a favour. Marriage is an option
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by Nobody: 3:35pm On Aug 09, 2021
Chuky7:
Has anyone experienced this. This is where I find myself. And I keep getting talks like it's a bad thing. Talks like your last has married before you shouldn't you be ashamed. Some even go to extent of proclaiming abomination.

For me all this one's no concern me. I am a playboy at heart and will marry at my own time or not at all. Depends on how I feel.

Peace of Mind and Freedom is Priceless. Don't Take it away from me.

So have you had similar experience please share
do you even know the meaning or reasons some guys turn playboy?You found the word and you are feeling fly on it...foolish mentality...what do you have that you are calling yourself playboy?

1 Like

Re: Marrying Last As First Child by MummyD2020(f): 3:36pm On Aug 09, 2021
Benz4pimp:
do you even know the meaning or reasons some guys turn playboy?You found the word and you are feeling fly on it...foolish mentality...what do you have that you are calling yourself playboy?


Im more pissed than u bros. He sounds like hes a trophy. Mtheewwwwww
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by engrchykae(m): 3:37pm On Aug 09, 2021
Rubbiish:

@bold why would u say that? Lol
Are u that old? Are u more than 45?
am 35
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by MummyD2020(f): 3:39pm On Aug 09, 2021
CryptoRepublic1:
Don't jump into marriage, marriage ain't worth it anymore.

I won't get married if I can change back the time.

There's nothing in it for men.

But the kids are yours and bearing ur name. And will end up continuing ur generation
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by victorazy(m): 3:49pm On Aug 09, 2021
Chuky7:
Has anyone experienced this. This is where I find myself. And I keep getting talks like it's a bad thing. Talks like your last has married before you shouldn't you be ashamed. Some even go to extent of proclaiming abomination.

For me all this one's no concern me. I am a playboy at heart and will marry at my own time or not at all. Depends on how I feel.

Peace of Mind and Freedom is Priceless. Don't Take it away from me.

So have you had similar experience please share
Guy you lie
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by Rubbiish(m): 3:50pm On Aug 09, 2021
engrchykae:
am 35
U are not old na...
The right lady will come, na just patience
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by engrchykae(m): 3:52pm On Aug 09, 2021
Rubbiish:

U are not old na...
The right lady will come, na just patience
am tired of waiting,you know I am not the outing type,I come back from work and watch film or browse with phone.
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by LiveLifeHub(m): 4:05pm On Aug 09, 2021
Chuky7:
Has anyone experienced this. This is where I find myself. And I keep getting talks like it's a bad thing. Talks like your last has married before you shouldn't you be ashamed. Some even go to extent of proclaiming abomination.

For me all this one's no concern me. I am a playboy at heart and will marry at my own time or not at all. Depends on how I feel.

Peace of Mind and Freedom is Priceless. Don't Take it away from me.

So have you had similar experience please share


Marriage is actually a choice.
But you being a playboy is criminal, is either you are married or a celibate.
You might think you are a smart playboy, but nah your destiny and glory the devil dey use play.
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by litaninja(m): 4:06pm On Aug 09, 2021
That is what responsible means to you? so i build 10 houses and feed 100 people ...but because I didn't buy pampers i'm irresponsible? You people need to start thinking above basic level so that you can progress.

Trustedpronet:


Oga if you don't know the cost of pampers, child depriving you from sleeping at night, paying school fees, providing daily bread and browsing a website for 10years without intention of changing IP address man! You are not responsible.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Marrying Last As First Child by kaboninc(m): 4:07pm On Aug 09, 2021
Jorge91:
This our nigeria mentality that a man must marry, if the man dies tomorrow leaving the wife and kids with nothing, those that pressurized you to marry will not do shit for your family. Marriage you have to be mentally and financially ready.

Is it really an Nigerian mentality?
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by kaboninc(m): 4:08pm On Aug 09, 2021
LiveLifeHub:



Marriage is actually a choice.
But you being a playboy is criminal, is either you are married or a celibate.
You might think you are a smart playboy, but nah your destiny and glory the devil dey use play.

Criminal?

To be a playboy?
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by litaninja(m): 4:09pm On Aug 09, 2021
There is no right time. The right time is when he chooses. Simple.

okine4real:
let me just add something, OP, there are stages in life, there is a stage at which a man should get married,i peg it at 30 years. as a man, maximum of 38 years or worst case, at 40 years you should be done with child birth. Practical lesson, whats the age of your father when you turned 20 years? if you are 40 years and you give birth to a child, it means at 60 years your child would be 20 years. Now ask yourself and look around your environment, how many men are doing financially ohk @60 years? If you are 60 years and you are not doing financially well, how do you want to take care of your 20 year old Son or Daughter? If you can;t take care of them, mostly the females goes into prostitution, the male would join bad gangs.

You have to make Hay while the Sun shine. if you neglect the right time for you to get married, it would hunt you when you grow old. When you grow old you now want your Daughter to marry a rich man, yet you did not train your own Daughter very well. Marriage is not easy, if anybody tells you marriage is easy, the person is fooling you, but you still have to do it. If by 30 you never marry, you have started missing it, this is the plain truth. Marry a younger woman, you see when getting married, always put your old age into consideration, if you marry your age, whom would take care of you when you grow old, or when you cant see or walk again? at the extreme of my street, there is a papa there, about 100 years, he cant hear again, but his wife is doing the walking about, going to buy this and that.... i have lots to tell you... But you see this life and you are enjoying, flexing, drinking beer, clubbing, am not saying its bad ohh, but if you are doing all this and yet you never put woman for house and your children are not growing while drinking beer, it would hurt you when you turn 50 years. My wife is 32 years, we have 4 kids, 10 years, 6 years, 2 years and 5 months.. If my wife and my first son is walking, you would think my first son is my wife's elder sister Son. He is almost as tall as the mother. i even delay in giving birth to all my kids because am suppose to push all my children at once, but at least i try... Feel free to quote me if you like.


Regards
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by scrolldown88: 4:10pm On Aug 09, 2021
toren:


So a man's wife and children are leeches because he takes responsibility for them? You're sick in the head.

Again you mistake my point. Once a man decides to get married and have kids then I suppose he is responsible for his wife, his wife is also responsible for him and they both should be responsible for any children they choose to have. That said, a man who decides he'll rather remain single that take up the responsibility of a family is still 100% a man... and could be as responsible as every other married man out there

1 Like

Re: Marrying Last As First Child by kaboninc(m): 4:10pm On Aug 09, 2021
2kurupt:

Words on marble.

This is what people forming woke and always copying the West would fail to tell you. They only copy the negative aspect of things

Don't you think we have people like the op, same thinking, same mentality in the West too?
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by kaboninc(m): 4:12pm On Aug 09, 2021
litaninja:
There is no right time. The right time is when he chooses. Simple.


Until he lives the consequences of what time he chose, then can he say it was the right time....or not.
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by kaboninc(m): 4:13pm On Aug 09, 2021
CryptoRepublic1:
Don't jump into marriage, marriage ain't worth it anymore.

I won't get married if I can change back the time.

There's nothing in it for men.

For you. And you only.
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by scrolldown88: 4:14pm On Aug 09, 2021
Trustedpronet:


Oga if you don't know the cost of pampers, child depriving you from sleeping at night, paying school fees, providing daily bread and browsing a website for 10years without intention of changing IP address man! You are not responsible.

Lol, I am responsible enough to know that I don't want that for myself...at least not yet. I am responsible enough not to let the pressure of you lot get to me forcing me go into something at the wrong time. I'm responsible enough to have other responsibilities and seeing to them

2 Likes

Re: Marrying Last As First Child by kaboninc(m): 4:14pm On Aug 09, 2021
Oshokalo:
true, I have heard this nonsense before, somebody told me am still a boy because am not married yet

Sorry he called you a boy.

You're a man.
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by MrNipplesLover(m): 4:15pm On Aug 09, 2021
Chuky7:
Has anyone experienced this. This is where I find myself. And I keep getting talks like it's a bad thing. Talks like your last has married before you shouldn't you be ashamed. Some even go to extent of proclaiming abomination.

For me all this one's no concern me. I am a playboy at heart and will marry at my own time or not at all. Depends on how I feel.

Peace of Mind and Freedom is Priceless. Don't Take it away from me.

So have you had similar experience please share

My lil sister is married.

My lil bro is planning his as well, go take place early next year.

I no get any plans to marry cos na only coded runs girls i dey stack... My lil sis know say na olosho I dey carry.

If I'm to start pro creating, I go just find one fine babe put prick in her toto make she dey born my babies and I go dey take care of her (baby mama shiit), and nobody go question my decision... It's my life... Not anyone's.


So, bro, live ur life the way it pleases you.

What dey say no dey concern me... Be like say u feel more concerned.


I hail u, gee.
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by kaboninc(m): 4:16pm On Aug 09, 2021
scrolldown88:


Lol, I am responsible enough to know that I don't want that for myself...at least not yet. I am responsible enough not to let the pressure of you lot get to me forcing me go into something at the wrong time. I'm responsible enough to have other responsibilities and seeing to them

Yes bro, you are very right. And I support you.

But if I'm to give an unsolicited advice, if you really desire to have and raise kids, please have them on time. It may not be when you're ready....because truly, we are never ever ready.
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by kaboninc(m): 4:23pm On Aug 09, 2021
MrNipplesLover:


My lil sister is married.

My lil bro is planning his as well, go take place early next year.

I no get any plans to marry cos na only coded runs girls i dey stack...

If I'm to start pro creating, I go just find one fine babe put prick in her toto make she dey born my babies and I go dey take care of her (baby mama shiit), and nobody go question my decision... It's my life... Not anyone's.
So, bro, live ur life the way it pleases you.
What dey say no dey concern me... Be like say u feel more concerned.
I hail u, gee.

Yeah... Our choices, we're free to make them. Yes. But let's remember that our choices have serious consequences especially as to how these children will live either in a good home with both parents or single homes with single parents.

3 Likes

Re: Marrying Last As First Child by kaboninc(m): 4:31pm On Aug 09, 2021
adanny01:


The problem with responsibility is that the decisions you make today affect tomorrow.

So being a playboy now and choosing to settle and have kids far later in your life is an irresponsible decision. This is because having kids at 50 doesn't give the best for your children. Believe me or not, time is part of responsibility. So to be responsible, you have to decide early if you will marry or not. Delaying that decision alone is irresponsibility.

Responsibility is also bravery, imagine knowing you like women but you chose to have a stable family against your personal desires. That means you have made a sacrifice. That sacrifice is an act of responsibility to the wife and children you have.

If you have decided not to have a wife or children, it means you have chosen not to be responsible for anyone other than yourself. Don't forget that you still have a responsibility towards your old parents and relatives.

If you choose to have a wife and children, you are required to be responsible for them.

It is always looked at as irresponsibility if you have no responsibility towards a person other than yourself.

You have simply avoided any kind of responsibility so you can be said to be irresponsible.

Any woman who dates you is dating an irresponsible man because you have no intention of assuming any responsibility in her life.

In contrast, you are being responsible for using protection so that you will not become a full blown irresponsible man. The only thing here is that you are still only being responsible to yourself.

For me, responsibility is relative

I would say at this point, you cannot be judged as an irresponsible man, but if you let yourself reach 50 before deciding to have kids, you can be said to have lived an irresponsible life.

This I strongly disagree.
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by yanabasee1(m): 4:32pm On Aug 09, 2021
Emmani360:


If marriage is your yardstick for measuring maturity then you ain't mature.
It's not only priests and nuns that are exempted from staying single and if it's God's wish that we all should get married then the ratio of male to female birth/death in the whole world should be 1:1
It's Better to stay single and happy than to get married and stay unhappy for the rest of your life

Mumu.... I never said it measure maturity....


You idiots just read to quote and not to understand...


Gettat
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by yanabasee1(m): 4:34pm On Aug 09, 2021
kestolove95:
what if someone doesn't have the means?

Only if you don't want to...


It's a mental situation...


It's like staying broke... if you don't sit up... you'd remain broke...

Anybody who wants to get married will eventually settle down...
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by yanabasee1(m): 4:39pm On Aug 09, 2021
Semaj77:


Being single doesn't mean you can not take care of yourself , there are philanthropist who donate to worthy causes and are single , are you saying they can not take care of themselves or that they are irresponsible , you seriously need to change this your thought process

You read and don't understand.... You need to work on yourself....
Re: Marrying Last As First Child by yanabasee1(m): 4:42pm On Aug 09, 2021
Semaj77:



Marriage isn't proof of responsibility , I know a lot , and I mean a lot , of men who are highly irresponsible and are married. Also this backward mentality that we have as Africans is just dumb , anyone can choose not to get married if they so desire , it doesn't take anything away from you.


This is a child's mentality....


This Africa and we hold some traditions.... if you don't by this... go out and claim citizenship of a foreign country and let Africa be...

You people will selectively agree to some Western countries traditions and abolish some.... Yet wants Africa to change and follow the white's traditions...

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