₦airaland Forum

I haven't really had one.


Anyway, Agriculture is life

LadyD22:
Stopped talking to my real mom coz its been more than 15 years and the woman is still making excuses to not come and see how big I am , I just wished her goodluck and never responding to any of her messages or her calls ever, not even invited to my wedding or whatever it is , she has her reasons for staying away so I leave her to God

sigh

Moz22:
One of the most difficult thing I've ever done has to be.... Stopped talking to the one that I genuinely loved, that shit hurt as hell.. but it is what it is mehn! We move

What's yours

when my girl leave me without any reason

learning how to trade professionally and the shit is fucking hard because it take years to be perfect with it.

everybody just they talk love, love here , well investing my last card in stock market, I am currently denying myself of luxuries, good food ,, good clothes, but I know all those things are temporary, I think long-term not short term.

LadyD22:
Stopped talking to my real mom coz its been more than 15 years and the woman is still making excuses to not come and see how big I am , I just wished her goodluck and never responding to any of her messages or her calls ever, not even invited to my wedding or whatever it is , she has her reasons for staying away so I leave her to God

This is painful... please don't give up on her yet... do you live in two separate countries? Can you not go to her if she can't come to you? I pray God fixes your relationship with her because it's an important relationship (Amen).

Double0h7:
This is painful... please don't give up on her yet... do you live in two separate countries? Can you not go to her if she can't come to you? I pray God fixes your relationship with her because it's an important relationship (Amen).

Same state which makes it all the more pathetic , same pH I just need address nobody want to give me any address , I've sent my address to her severally , I've called and begged and cried and attempted suicide , nothing hurts more than a rejection from someone you love , she had me with my dad when he was still married with my other mom and she left me coz she was too young to give me a good life , but its been ages since I last saw her , it would've have been okay if my second mom didn't rub it in my face every single time , but no, rejection in all angles , I only have one dad and I'm eternally grateful for him , he's the only thing I'm holding onto , my mom can live her life , I'm honestly stronger without her

Funny how she's literally stalking every social media account I have , I accept out of respect but no conversations , even when I recently signed up for Facebook again , she sent a request like maybe she comes and searches my name every week until it showed up , comments on all my pics , I mean all of them , very strange woman , she has a baby now , I don't even know if she's married , I'm not curious enough to ask , our relationship is that bad but you learn to adapt to things as you grow

Divoc19:
Thank you so much.

Can I get to you at least to make ur day?

LadyD22:
Same state which makes it all the more pathetic , same pH I just need address nobody want to give me any address , I've sent my address to her severally , I've called and begged and cried and attempted suicide , nothing hurts more than a rejection from someone you love , she had me with my dad when he was still married with my other mom and she left me coz she was too young to give me a good life , but its been ages since I last saw her , it would've have been okay if my second mom didn't rub it in my face every single time , but no, rejection in all angles , I only have one dad and I'm eternally grateful for him , he's the only thing I'm holding onto , my mom can live her life , I'm honestly stronger without her

Funny how she's literally stalking every social media account I have , I accept out of respect but no conversations , even when I recently signed up for Facebook again , she sent a request like maybe she comes and searches my name every week until it showed up , comments on all my pics , I mean all of them , very strange woman , she has a baby now , I don't even know if she's married , I'm not curious enough to ask , our relationship is that bad but you learn to adapt to things as you grow

Wow. It sounds so complex. The fact that she searches for you and reaches out often is a blessing. Maybe she is not proud of her life and afraid of you seeing her and maybe rejecting her or not being proud of her... There might be a lot of guilt she is carrying and she might be afraid of the questions she has to answer to.

I'm not making excuses for her, I just don't want you to blame yourself, and take the 'rejection' personally. It might have nothing to do with you and more about her. I'm sorry for the pain this must cause you.

I have a few friends who had to grow up without their mothers for similar reasons and it really missed them up. The rejection took a toll on them, and one of them couldn't be a good mother herself because of her experience. She lost her children and her life went down the drain after she lost her own children. It's a vicious cycle if one is not careful. Please try and get counseling so you could heal from the trauma if you can. I wish you peace of mind.

LadyD22:
Stopped talking to my real mom coz its been more than 15 years and the woman is still making excuses to not come and see how big I am , I just wished her goodluck and never responding to any of her messages or her calls ever, not even invited to my wedding or whatever it is , she has her reasons for staying away so I leave her to God

Tell us why your real mom will abandon you?

22o62021:
Tell us why your real mom will abandon you?

May God help us.

LadyD22:
Same state which makes it all the more pathetic , same pH I just need address nobody want to give me any address , I've sent my address to her severally , I've called and begged and cried and attempted suicide , nothing hurts more than a rejection from someone you love , she had me with my dad when he was still married with my other mom and she left me coz she was too young to give me a good life , but its been ages since I last saw her , it would've have been okay if my second mom didn't rub it in my face every single time , but no, rejection in all angles , I only have one dad and I'm eternally grateful for him , he's the only thing I'm holding onto , my mom can live her life , I'm honestly stronger without her

Funny how she's literally stalking every social media account I have , I accept out of respect but no conversations , even when I recently signed up for Facebook again , she sent a request like maybe she comes and searches my name every week until it showed up , comments on all my pics , I mean all of them , very strange woman , she has a baby now , I don't even know if she's married , I'm not curious enough to ask , our relationship is that bad but you learn to adapt to things as you grow

I can help you locate her if you want. It comes at a price tho

ajahinnousa:
The day I asked for assistance from one man that I have known for long here in Abuja. I called him that I needed a favor from him and he said I should come over to the house.

I went to his house and waited for him to come back and I explained to him that I want to learn a digital skill like video editing and other related skills.

He told me bluntly that if it's money that I need he is sorry he can't help me. Thank God I didn't die of shame that day, because that was the first time I begged someone for financial assistance

Such is life. No think am

Double0h7:
Wow. It sounds so complex. The fact that she searches for you and reaches out often is a blessing. Maybe she is not proud of her life and afraid of you seeing her and maybe rejecting her or not being proud of her... There might be a lot of guilt she is carrying and she might be afraid of the questions she has to answer to.

I'm not making excuses for her, I just don't want you to blame yourself, and take the 'rejection' personally. It might have nothing to do with you and more about her. I'm sorry for the pain this must cause you.

I have a few friends who had to grow up without their mothers for similar reasons and it really missed them up. The rejection took a toll on them, and one of them couldn't be a good mother herself because of her experience. She lost her children and her life went down the drain after she lost her own children. It's a vicious cycle if one is not careful. Please try and get counseling so you could heal from the trauma if you can. I wish you peace of mind.

I've thought about counselling , its not cheap , I know I want it and I need it but I can't afford it right now and I'm not a fan of pastor counseling its usually biased , I think it affected me especially in my friendship and relationship life , I have few friends remaining but I've chased a lot of ppl away coz I always feel they want to be around for selfish reasons and they will leave me too and I leave them first to feel good , its worse with my exes , they weren't much better but I would constantly look for reasons to prove that they don't want to be with me and then I find myself leaving sometimes without a fight , I only have one person that has adapted to this and that's my bff , she knows when I want to be alone and when I'm ready to be with her , I can stay a month I won't call her I won't pick her call , she NEVER STOPS CALLING she's never upset , when I start explaining she just says " its okay , I understand " and its been happening for years , I think I'll be okay sha I'm coping at least

22o62021:
Tell us why your real mom will abandon you?

I don't know

LadyD22:
I've thought about counselling , its not cheap , I know I want it and I need it but I can't afford it right now and I'm not a fan of pastor counseling its usually biased , I think it affected me especially in my friendship and relationship life , I have few friends remaining but I've chased a lot of ppl away coz I always feel they want to be around for selfish reasons and they will leave me too and I leave them first to feel good , its worse with my exes , they weren't much better but I would constantly look for reasons to prove that they don't want to be with me and then I find myself leaving sometimes without a fight , I only have one person that has adapted to this and that's my bff , she knows when I want to be alone and when I'm ready to be with her , I can stay a month I won't call her I won't pick her call , she NEVER STOPS CALLING she's never upset , when I start explaining she just says " its okay , I understand " and its been happening for years , I think I'll be okay sha I'm coping at least

hmmm

LadyD22:
Stopped talking to my real mom coz its been more than 15 years and the woman is still making excuses to not come and see how big I am , I just wished her goodluck and never responding to any of her messages or her calls ever, not even invited to my wedding or whatever it is , she has her reasons for staying away so I leave her to God

So you are saying your mom stayed away from you that long....she wasn't even invited to your wedding??
Na wa ooo

LadyD22:
Same state which makes it all the more pathetic , same pH I just need address nobody want to give me any address , I've sent my address to her severally , I've called and begged and cried and attempted suicide , nothing hurts more than a rejection from someone you love , she had me with my dad when he was still married with my other mom and she left me coz she was too young to give me a good life , but its been ages since I last saw her , it would've have been okay if my second mom didn't rub it in my face every single time , but no, rejection in all angles , I only have one dad and I'm eternally grateful for him , he's the only thing I'm holding onto , my mom can live her life , I'm honestly stronger without her

Funny how she's literally stalking every social media account I have , I accept out of respect but no conversations , even when I recently signed up for Facebook again , she sent a request like maybe she comes and searches my name every week until it showed up , comments on all my pics , I mean all of them , very strange woman , she has a baby now , I don't even know if she's married , I'm not curious enough to ask , our relationship is that bad but you learn to adapt to things as you grow

So sorry about this, sis.
You may have to come to terms with the fact that you may never have a normal mother and daughter relationship.
I'm sure you know that already, but hope is quite seductive.
If she doesn't want to have anything to do with you offline, it's best you block every access she has to you online and simply accept reality.
As for your step mom, keep ignoring her. I'm happy your dad is doing his best, as you imply.
Keep your head above the water, dear.
Your mental health comes first.

Sure

Athemisia:
Can I get to you at least to make ur day?

Divoc19:
Sure

Ok, I'll email you...

LadyD22:
I've thought about counselling , its not cheap , I know I want it and I need it but I can't afford it right now and I'm not a fan of pastor counseling its usually biased , I think it affected me especially in my friendship and relationship life , I have few friends remaining but I've chased a lot of ppl away coz I always feel they want to be around for selfish reasons and they will leave me too and I leave them first to feel good , its worse with my exes , they weren't much better but I would constantly look for reasons to prove that they don't want to be with me and then I find myself leaving sometimes without a fight , I only have one person that has adapted to this and that's my bff , she knows when I want to be alone and when I'm ready to be with her , I can stay a month I won't call her I won't pick her call , she NEVER STOPS CALLING she's never upset , when I start explaining she just says " its okay , I understand " and its been happening for years , I think I'll be okay sha I'm coping at least

mind we talk?

Starz825:
So you are saying your mom stayed away from you that long....she wasn't even invited to your wedding??
Na wa ooo

I'm not married oh , I said she's not invited if I were to be getting married someday , nor is she expected to show up at my graduation , I never marry oh , not even close to marriage yet

Loreettaa:
So sorry about this, sis.
You may have to come to terms with the fact that you may never have a normal mother and daughter relationship.
I'm sure you know that already, but hope is quite seductive.
If she doesn't want to have anything to do with you offline, it's best you block every access she has to you online and simply accept reality.
As for your step mom, keep ignoring her. I'm happy your dad is doing his best, as you imply.
Keep your head above the water, dear.
Your mental health comes first.

Yes I'm trying to , I just allowed her to be on Facebook but she doesn't have my numbers to call again , I don't have hers either , I swear I've accepted it already , I leave her in God's hands

Moz22:
mind we talk?

I don't mind but I'm not depressed or anything , so i won't appreciate pity , if its about other things , sure , you can drop ur number or email I'll reach you

LadyD22:
Stopped talking to my real mom coz its been more than 15 years and the woman is still making excuses to not come and see how big I am , I just wished her goodluck and never responding to any of her messages or her calls ever, not even invited to my wedding or whatever it is , she has her reasons for staying away so I leave her to God

Pls try and reconcile with her. it is not really healthy like that. I know it is pride on both of u. but try and bend to her,lf not for any thing,she is d one that gave birth to u..But for d sake of God Almighty and me,forgive her wat so ever she did to u..it is well.I don't know u in person,but do that for me possibly before d end of did month.

olaxm:
learning how to trade professionally and the shit is fucking hard because it take years to be perfect with it.

Nottin good comes easy man

Double0h7:
Wow. It sounds so complex. The fact that she searches for you and reaches out often is a blessing. Maybe she is not proud of her life and afraid of you seeing her and maybe rejecting her or not being proud of her... There might be a lot of guilt she is carrying and she might be afraid of the questions she has to answer to.

I'm not making excuses for her, I just don't want you to blame yourself, and take the 'rejection' personally. It might have nothing to do with you and more about her. I'm sorry for the pain this must cause you.

I have a few friends who had to grow up without their mothers for similar reasons and it really missed them up. The rejection took a toll on them, and one of them couldn't be a good mother herself because of her experience. She lost her children and her life went down the drain after she lost her own children. It's a vicious cycle if one is not careful. Please try and get counseling so you could heal from the trauma if you can. I wish you peace of mind.

Amen

LadyD22:
I don't mind but I'm not depressed or anything , so i won't appreciate pity , if its about other things , sure , you can drop ur number or email I'll reach you

primekeys2020@gmail.com

Divoc19:
Giving up on my dreams to live a quiet and peaceful life

And if you don't mind, I pray you tell me what's the dream?

Chances I might be rocking your shoe (a size lesser or more).

Happy rocking to you.
Maybe one day e fit still happen buh, I ain't pushing it.

jojothaiv:
And if you don't mind, I pray you tell me what's the dream?

Chances I might be rocking your shoe (a size lesser or more).

Was moving on from my ex!
It hurt cus We actually grew up together!